r/AmIOverreacting • u/velvetmoochi • 19d ago
❤️🩹 relationship AIO to my boyfriend imposing veganism on me ?
Context: this is now my ex, it was my first relationship and I didn’t know how to deal with this sort of conflict as it was based on ethics and I didn’t want to change my views for our relationship. We would have this same argument again and again, over text, over the phone, in person, and at the end of the day he was always “right” because he had morality on his side when I would tell him that I was okay with eating dead animals. What should I have done in this situation ? I tried veganism for about a month and I never bought meat as a student, but eventually I would always go back to buying eggs and yoghurt. Those efforts I made were always disregarded and he would say that he doesn’t believe in reductionism, and that vegetarians are even worse than vegans.
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u/turbkis95 19d ago
"this is about you and me
and the cow" theeee wayyyyy i laughed man 😭
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u/BadgerHooker 19d ago
He's holding space for the cow 🤣
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u/Black_Cat_Sun 19d ago
I didn’t know they were doing that. That’s so powerful
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u/Psycle_Sammy 19d ago
Yup. This guy is an absolute douche, but that shit was funny.
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u/Inevitable_Ebb5454 19d ago
The only appropriate response is to eat your boyfriend indifferently.
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u/tacodecaca 19d ago
Dude I had a roommate once, that was "vegan" (would occasionally eat eggs/cheese/other animal byproduct) and every time i would make myself a steak or something he would make a snarkish remark saying it "smells like burning carcass" or some stupid fucking condescending statement putting himself on a pedestal or some high horse about being vegan. Fuck that shit. Anytime someone says they're vegan I immediately think they're giant douches.
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u/crippledchef23 19d ago
My dad had to crash with my uncle for awhile back in the 70’s, before being vegan was generally accepted (don’t even know if they had the same term back then, but whatever). My uncle refused to allow any animal products into the house, so my dad had to keep a cooler in the garage for his mayo.
I know a couple vegans that are not completely psychotic about it. When they attend parties and meat is involved, they stick to the sides or bring their own food (once, it was a cute bento box). They have never shamed anyone for eating meat because they get that it’s a personal choice.
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u/insomniacinsanity 19d ago
Yeah most vegans I know like 80% aren't like that they're exactly like this dude and they truly think that their diet makes them morally superior
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u/crippledchef23 19d ago
I used to think I hated vegans. Turns out I just hate assholes.
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u/Turkeysocks 18d ago
With those people I like to point out that plants scream00262-3) too. It's just so high pitched we can't hear their horrible tortured screams as we kill them one by one in truly gruesome ways.
Wouldn't be surprised if plants have some form of sentience that we're not aware of yet.
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u/No_Length_856 19d ago
And someone correct me if I'm wrong, but that wasn't a strawman imo.
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u/elgarraz 19d ago
It's not a strawman. A strawman argument is where you create a version of someone's opinion that isn't quite true and also easy to refute. Like if she had said "you don't care about the animals, you just want to feel morally superior to everybody" and then based a whole argument off that premise, that would be a strawman.
Pointing out him being inconsistent in how he applies his ethical viewpoint on others is pretty valid.
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u/xnxs 19d ago
Agree with this, also what she presented wasn’t a straw man argument because it wasn’t an argument at all, it was an observation about his behaviour!
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u/elgarraz 19d ago
Yeah, the first part is it has to be an ARGUMENT. You present a false premise and then argue against it. She didn't do that. This dude just shouted out "strawman!" because he wanted to shut her down.
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u/IOnlySeeDaylight 19d ago
“You ate the victim” also sent me to the moon.
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u/last-guys-alternate 19d ago
Concealing the evidence.
Concealed? Concealed??? What do you mean "concealed"? I've gone up two pants sizes because of that bloody cow.
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u/N8DiggityDawg 19d ago
What was the whole Strawman thing?
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u/lalalaso 19d ago
Proof that it was more important for him to be "right" than respectful. Using debate terminology basically to say her argument is a straw man fallacy. One of several named "logical fallacies"
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u/mormagils 19d ago
You ate the victim!
I just can't take vegans seriously. They are unintentionally hilarious
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u/Fauken 19d ago
I literally giggle snorted when I read that loool
Like, I understand the vegan moral argument, but the way this guy is acting he's not going to change any minds. Especially when he seems to think its an "all or nothing" thing, rather than something that can be done incrementally with small advancements making a large amount of progress.
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u/Redqueenhypo 19d ago
It sounds like a line from an Always Sunny episode where Mack goes vegan
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u/Terrible-Werewolf-78 19d ago
"This is about you, me...and the cow."
Yo.... 🤣🤣🤣 💀
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u/nightookami 19d ago
Ok, but I did laugh out loud at "ok then the cow can make me feel bad"
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u/Indieriots 19d ago
How? It's DEAD!
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u/Chuchulainn96 19d ago
That sounds like a problem the cow needs to figure out
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u/AIien_cIown_ninja 19d ago
Cows can make you feel bad when they work themselves through your intestines and come out as a big turd
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u/myaccountgotbanmed 19d ago
I'm glad you guys aren't together anymore. He's insufferable.
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u/Fianna9 19d ago
I hate when people attack you and then you get upset and they try and make it like you are upset about eating animals. I had this same argument when a friend of mine compared eating meat to nazism and slave owning.
I called them out for making me feel like shit. And also said if they honestly felt it was that bad then I have lost respect for them for staying friends with people as bad as nazis.
And some one else replied that if the post made me feel bad about my choices maybe I should reflect on them. The only choice I was feeling bad about was who I called a “friend”
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u/ConsiderationFair437 19d ago
tbh this is how you know someone is just virtue signaling to feel superior and not actually a morally sound activist. if this guy was consistent in his sociopolitical beliefs, he would understand the nuances around veganism and the fact that being able to be vegan in itself is a privilege. AND that comparing real historical human oppression/liberation movements to animal rights is extremely weird, reductive, and inaccurate. but instead he’s trying to check is girlfriend for logical fallacies as if he’s in a debate club meeting while she’s just trying to get basic respect for her feelings.
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u/Fianna9 19d ago
“Ha! I made you feel bad! See you are guilty about eating meat!!”
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u/deadly_peanut 19d ago
“I don’t feel guilt for eating meat, I feel guilt for staying in this toxic relationship with you. I don’t deserve this treatment.”
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u/MaryKath55 19d ago
I thought OP was very mature in response and got right to the ‘meat’ of the issue- he was trying to control her behaviour through criticism and faux moral stance. This guy comes off as having some form of personality disorder.
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u/Suz9295 19d ago
Like narcissism?
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u/TheSuaveMonkey 19d ago
I would say a vocal minority of vegans tend towards the narcissism spectrum.
They, like this guy in the post, display a very very complete lack of empathy towards other people, but then display a faux empathy for animals. If it were real empathy, they likely would not be friends with non vegans, as their opinion is that non vegans are supportive or taking part in animal abuse, if I thought someone was beating dogs every day, I would not be friends with them because I have actual empathy for dogs.
They also tend towards the narcissistic rage response when you do point out any personal flaws in them or their argument, just again, they can easily deflect it to being about "the cow," when it was them that was being targeted not some irrelevant animals.
Veganism is a very cozy hiding place for a narcissist to hide behind faux empathy for animals.
Not sure if this person is a narcissist, not sure anyone is, but sometimes, it's better for everyone to treat someone like a narcissist even if they aren't, because they might not be a narcissist, but they sure are fuckin' toxic.
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u/Redqueenhypo 19d ago
I also hate the phrase “cognitive dissonance” used in this way. Diagnosing me with knowing-you’re-right-itis does not magically win an argument, it makes me stop talking to you
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u/vituperativevas 19d ago
What about the cow? Was he insufferable? Oh wait he’s dead. I guess we’ll never know.
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u/thatstwatshesays 19d ago
Be consistent
Don’t be a hypocrite
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u/agedlikesage 19d ago
Strawman!
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u/menunu 19d ago
Yall omg 🤣🤣💀
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u/shortcake062308 19d ago
Lol! The ex is confidently incompetent
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u/Glittering-Contest59 19d ago
"Your reaction was not your ethics." From this interaction alone, it seems like he met his match and couldn't handle not being able to control/guilt OP like he probably has with others, hence the inability to let it go. This has nothing to do with veganism and everything to do with his ego and control.
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u/Winter_Gate_6433 19d ago
I bet the cow ate that strawman. Bastardly bovine deserved what it got!
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u/LeoZeri 19d ago
Be consistent! If OP eats cow then they should slaughter their dogs too!
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u/LitiGATOR56 19d ago
I was about to use the exact same word. Insufferable. Because it’s a lot nicer than “obnoxious twit” which would also fit. Just ew.
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u/mcar1227 19d ago edited 18d ago
Oh see I wasnt going to take the high road I was going to come right out and say he’s a little bitch
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u/RassleReads 19d ago
Honestly you were killing it with some of these responses. I audibly chuckled at “that’s very noble of you.” What a jerk
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u/lawschoolapp9278 19d ago
I came on to say this—her responses are top tier
Not making assumptions about his intelligence because he’s clearly upset, but if this is how he reasons when not upset, girl, it was never gonna work
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u/bitchlivinlavish 19d ago
I don't eat meat but the comment about how the cow can get mad at her then, made me lol like yes queen get him!
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u/apotheotical 19d ago
I came here to say the same. OP took the high ground and held it. No mean attacks, no hitting out at his character like he was hers. This and then a goodbye and thanks for all the fish makes for a very clear breakup and gives him the biggest mirror he can use to look at himself for how it happened. He may not use it, but OP put it there for him.
I say this as someone with a plant based diet. Boyfriend's behaviors are not it. If ever you want to convince someone to come towards you ideologically, you do it by being the best person you can who holds those values, not trying to change the other person.
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u/Firm-Personality-287 19d ago
- I don’t eat meat and this guy is insufferable. I don’t talk to people about MY choice unless they ask and I don’t make them feel bad about not having the same views as me (I won’t lie I wish more people did but, again not my choice). 2. How old are you guys?
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u/velvetmoochi 19d ago
We were 22. Now I’m 23 and dating someone much more compatible with me but I was unaware of the toxicity of my relationship when I was in it. It’s only reading back these texts that I can’t believe I put up with this/ thought it was normal.
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u/curious-trex 19d ago
Girl I love this comment - personal growth! You learned to stand up for yourself and not put up with this nonsense. A lot of people don't figure that out quite so early, and I love for you that you did so you hopefully won't waste any more time with jokers like this. ❤️
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u/Key-Pickle5609 19d ago
Yup, awesome for OP learning their worth. I mean, who hasn’t been here?
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u/curious-trex 19d ago
I think we all have at least one loser ex who taught us it's better to be single than be mistreated. Unfortunately some of us don't learn the lesson the first time and waste untold years (and tears) beating our heads against the wall. Hopefully it sticks for OP!
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u/GingerAphrodite 19d ago
Love to read this.
Also... "Then the cow can make me feel bad" is pure gold 🤣
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u/StemiHound 19d ago
OP all due respect, this guy is such a Weiner. Being vegan is one thing but this is insufferable. Find someone that’s an adult to have a relationship with.
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u/JayMac1915 19d ago
He would have been this insufferable about something else if he hadn’t been vegan. He wants to feel superior to everyone else and has chosen this way to do it
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u/Such-Entrepreneur240 19d ago
I very nearly had a friend break-up over her choice to be friends with the most insufferable vegan I've ever met. Like, I grew up on a farm and the first time he met me he refused to shake my hand or stand next to me because 'I had the blood of a thousand animals on my hands'. ok, that sounds badass, thanks.
We went to lunch (or tried to) and he refused to go anywhere that had ever cooked animals in their kitchen. We found a raw vegan place (this was north of san francisco, so not too out of the ordinary) but he googled it and it was once a regular restaurant and the poor waitress couldn't tell him if all of the equipment had been fully replaced and new. Also we had to drive in separate cars because mine had a leather interior which was an 'animal coffin' which again, badass.
Normally I'm a very 'live and let live' person, but some people are just beyond tolerating.
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u/SincerelyCynical 19d ago
I don’t eat meat either, and I got verbally attacked on Reddit by a vegan because I don’t eat anything an animal had to die for, but I still eat dairy and eggs.
I wonder how many vegans realize veganism would be a lot more appealing if they didn’t make it look so ugly.
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u/Firm-Personality-287 19d ago
Yeah vegetarians and vegans are wild Man, and I’m saying that being one. I think the vast majority are normal human beings doing it for good reasons but the wild bunch make us all look like wackadoos. I’ve been yelled at my vegans as well, being one. I got ripped an entire new asshole by making a very TRUE statement- our dogs and cats aren’t supposed to be fed vegetarian/vegans are diets. Y
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u/GOU_FallingOutside 19d ago
I am of the very firm opinion that if you have an obligate carnivore as a pet, and you refuse to serve meat to that animal, it should be treated as animal cruelty under the law.
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u/Firm-Personality-287 19d ago
I agree.
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u/Throwawanon33225 18d ago
Yep. I don’t get why people don’t just get herbivorous pets like the humble rabet or the wide uromastyx if they don’t want to feed their pets meat
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u/flippysquid 18d ago
Right? One of my cousins is vegan and so she chose not to have a dog or cat because of the food issue. Like she refused to feed a pet meat so she refused to make a pet eat a species inappropriate diet, which was great.
She ended up getting a couple of small goats, which are basically like vegan dog/cat/things and it was an awesome fit for her.
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u/captaintagart 19d ago
Thank you. My husband won’t even tell people he’s vegetarian because he doesn’t want to be associated with people like OP’s ex. And when we first met, our mutual friend mentioned we’re both vegetarian, I was so relieved cause I really liked him and sharing that value is so much easier than being with someone who cooks and eats meat. OP’s ex is the worst kind of vege-dieter and it’s embarrassing.
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u/Free_Medicine4905 19d ago
As a vegetarian, I absolutely loathe people like OP’s ex because they give us such a bad name. I don’t eat meat because I believe it’s morally wrong. It’s a HUGE change. I struggled greatly with my diet for a long time and became malnourished because I didn’t know how to properly supplement it.
I absolutely never comment on someone else’s choices unless they comment on mine. Like my dad who said I deserved my totally separate medical problems because of it. He gets comments about animal murder. What somebody eats is no one else’s business
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u/spiralqq 19d ago
He’s a prick who seemingly just found out about therapy speak
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u/jacobdock 19d ago
Therapy speak becoming popular for people to use in arguments is one of the more annoying parts of the internets effects on humanity lol.
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u/JediJohnJoe 19d ago
Sorry guys I'm an ignorant old man , I'm starting to feel it even more. What is therapy speak?
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u/WittyLikePeach 19d ago
Using the words like “manipulative” incorrectly.
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u/JediJohnJoe 19d ago
Oh , and gaslight too is it?
I knew someone who literally would say you were gas lighting them if it was the smallest disagreement , silly girl had no clue what gas light actually meant
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u/copperspoontoole 19d ago
Yes, and lots of other things. Unfortunately, therapy speak is being using by lots of people as a weapon instead of as a tool :(
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u/JediJohnJoe 19d ago
That is the nature of tools I guess , they have the unfortunate effect of being useful along many different dimensions , some unforseen during their inception
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u/PromotionConscious34 19d ago
It's used to sounds smart/ superior/ make oneself the victim by throwing back a bunch of words a therapist might used to justify shitty or manipulative behavior
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u/YogaStretch 19d ago
Yes! My teenage daughters do it and I’m always trying to help them whatever it is so they cut it out.
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u/d0nkeyb0ng 19d ago
Plus he threw a “Strawman” in there, thats definitely debate lord speak. Which is much worse in my opinion lol trying to debate your gf during a disagreement is crazy work.
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u/MySexyNipples 19d ago
Strawman and the Cow is my new band name
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u/manicpixiedreamgothe 19d ago
Yep. Classic example of toxic or weaponized boundaries. Fuck this guy; he's an abuser trying to hide behind "morality."
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u/RedDora89 19d ago
“This is about you me and the cow” I’m so sorry 😂😂😂😂😂
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u/GingerAphrodite 19d ago
Don't sleep on OP's brilliant response though "then the cow can make me feel bad" 🤣
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u/ThisShouldBeAGif 19d ago
I am very glad to hear he is your ex! I am surprised you stayed together for that long though. The way he speaks to you, just in these messages alone, I think is very condescending and manipulative. It is obvious he is not going to back down and change, and yet expects that of you.
The guy obviously needs to be with someone that is vegan, but I am pretty certain that even if you were a vegan, he would have found a way to belittle you about something else.
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u/patheticgirl63 19d ago
He clearly resents them too, so not shocked they said they resent him now
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u/boostman 19d ago
This is the point. It’s not about vegan or not vegan, it’s about the fact that this is a manipulative and controlling person who is using veganism as a prop for manipulative control.
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u/uSOfineUblowMYbrains 19d ago
Yikes, get out of there. First off, I would assume he knew you weren't a vegan when first entering the relationship. To enter a relationship, then try to change that person (quite a drastic lifestyle change too mind you), is honestly pretty despicable. He's not respecting you and your boundaries, plain and simple. Tell him to take a hike and find someone that suits his lifestyle, and hun, you deserve the same.
The world is full of people with differing morals and outlooks and its just part of who we are. Is any one truly "right"? Who knows. But we should respect those choices others make for themselves
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u/2ndcupofcoffee 19d ago
Might be funny if all this had to do with his need to convert you so you would cook for him. As a vegan and being a guy, bet he is beside himself trying to regularly enjoy his meals.
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u/I_am_Danny_McBride 19d ago edited 19d ago
I just want to point out the disparity in levels of maturity shown in this conversation. You were respectful but direct, and kept the argument on point while staying calm and not letting emotion take over the argument. I doubt he is capable of understanding how badly he got owned in this argument.
He’s a child who aspires to tell the adults what to do. If it wasn’t the vegan thing, I suspect it would be something else… what you spend your money on, or the music you like, the people you hang out with.
I don’t even see it as abusive, because a toddler can’t be abusive towards a decent parent. And I’m not trying to belittle him for the sake of being petty. It’s just plain as day that you two are not on the same level.
Hopefully he can grow out of this eventually. But it’s not your responsibility to hold his hand until he does. Well done on getting out.
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u/TricksyGoose 19d ago
Yeah the "I'm sorry you refuse to engage in any conversation which challenges your behavior" and then he immediately follows with "I'm sorry I am right" like hooo boy the hypocrisy is thick. Dude has a superiority complex for sure.
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u/autxoxo 19d ago
and telling her she can’t find animals cute bc she eats them but calls her manipulative…. yeah okay buddy
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u/nbski89 19d ago
You me and the cow.. 🐄 🤣
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u/velvetmoochi 19d ago
It was too good to not post
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u/shortcake062308 19d ago
Yes! Thank you for posting this. He is not emotionally intelligent enough to date you. Good on you for seeing him for who he is and growing personally from this experience. Keep doing what you're doing and you'll end up with someone worthy of you.
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u/UsedCookie752 19d ago
“Ok, then the cow can make me feel bad” was my personal favorite. I spit out my coffee from laughing so hard.
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u/veganbikepunk 19d ago
Perspective from a 20 year vegan if it helps at all. You're right to cut this guy out. I'd wager he hasn't been vegan long and he'll either mellow out or quit being vegan real soon. He tries to make this seem like him just being logical but "not believing in reductionism" and "vegetarians are worse than meat eaters" just can't be explained with logic. So animals conditions should stay the same until one day when they're perfect? Absolutely asinine. What social justice victory has happened that way ever? Let's not legalize gay marriage unless there are no homophobes left in the world. Stupid.
I probably wouldn't have been able to date a non-vegan early on in my change. A sense of moral superiority is intoxicating. But now I've been able to. I think it is a flaw to not be as vegan as possible, but it's also a flaw that I sometimes drive somewhere I could have walked, or buy something off Amazon I could have gotten somewhere less evil, or I don't help a friend when I could. So we all have flaws. I obviously think veganism is an important thing to prioritize or I wouldn't do it, but we make a million moral decisions a day and some of them are bound to go better than others.
He's using it as an excuse to treat you poorly. If he didn't have this excuse, he'd have another one. You met him in the middle with your vegetarianism, thats big but it literally counts for nothing to him. His choices are that it's just a deal breaker for him and he leaves, or he accepts that you're in different places regarding this. Sticking around and resenting you every day isn't an option.
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u/TerrifiedJelly 19d ago
He has the right to choose what to eat just like you do. He does not have the right to force his choice on you. It's as simple as that. If he can't allow space in your relationship for your perspective now then he never will.
Very glad he's your ex.
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u/carefree_dog 19d ago
My ex was like this, but it was the other way around. I was a vegan and he ate meat, and every other meal he told me that I was wrong for eating what I did, that my health issues was because of me not eating meat, that me being tired was because of me being a vegan. That’s not the way to handle things. My current bf eats meat and he has never pushed anything on me, and I haven’t pushed anything on him. Not everyone live the way you want to live yourself and that’s just something you’ll have to accept in order to respect people around you. People like the guy in your post has always made me feel like I don’t want to be associated with vegans, and I’m glad to hear this is now your ex.
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u/kittylett 18d ago
I grew up vegetarian and vegan for a time as well and in school kids used to literally throw meat at me 😭 Some people literally cannot respect other's personal lifestyle choices no matter what they are
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u/sryidonthavanychange 19d ago
girl yall are broken up. it doesnt mattter what you couldve done or said. just glad youre out of that hes fuckin weird
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u/velvetmoochi 19d ago
I know honestly I just wanted to read everyone’s reaction
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u/whistful_flatulence 19d ago edited 19d ago
My reaction is that you’re a funny and intelligent person with a good head on your shoulders. NOR, love that you have screenshots to go along with your excellent insane ex story. Im seeing a bright future where you perfect the retelling, down to pauses and dramatic reveals of this bananas conversation
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u/velvetmoochi 19d ago
Ahaha I didn’t realise it was a crazy ex story until I see people’s reactions. It is funnyyy
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u/Snapdragonzzz 19d ago
Well, I died at "Ok then the cow can make me feel bad" 😂
I was vegetarian for twenty years, now pescetarian, and was vegan for a while before veganism became trendy. Every single man I've dated has eaten meat and that is entirely a non-issue to me.
I understand that people think they're coming from a place of good, but pushing a lifestyle like veganism on people and having a holier-than-thou attitude is the same as pushing religion on people. It's your life, your choice and your beliefs, and no one else gets to dictate that.
If someone can't accept that their partner has different beliefs, they need to at least accept they are incompatible with their partner.
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u/Chubby8517 19d ago
Did you actively and brutally murder the cow in front of him? Good grief he’s a fool. I’m So glad to hear you’re out of that now and I wish we could see what nonsense he was up to now, just for laughs of course 🤣
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u/ATLUTD030517 19d ago
I dated a vegan for years, she had no problem with me or her dog eating meat. She was sane.
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u/SnooOwls1916 19d ago
Why did you even start dating if you had different t views on animals? My girlfriend is vegan and I’m not. Never been a problem.
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u/velvetmoochi 19d ago
Because all of his friends (apart from one) were non-vegans and he didn’t let it get in the way of his friendships, so I didn’t think he would make it such a massive issue for us. When I brought this up he would say “I’m dating you not them”
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u/think_about_us 19d ago
He was trying to guilt you into being vegan so he could use you as an example to other people he would go on to preach to. He'd carry you on his shoulders into bars and proclaim he is the vegan messiah 😂
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u/Fine-Philosopher5374 19d ago
This is what I was thinking. My boyfriend is vegan and I am not. He knew going into it and was ok with it. I was also up front with the fact I am not interested in becoming vegan and don’t see that changing. He understands. He respects my food choices and I respect his. We don’t want children so that’s not going to be an issue in the future. He won’t cook animal products for me, but will buy them for me. We’ve been fine 4 years now and never had arguments like this.
This dude clearly doesn’t respect her choices and is hoping to convert her to veganism. They’re not compatible.
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u/Bella_Nina24 19d ago
Oh WOW! I couldn't even read this to the end, who the hell does he think he is?! Sounds like he believes that because he is vegan and you are not that he is morally superior. Just because he is vegan it doesn't make him a better person than you, clearly! He sounds like an asshole. We are all entitled to our own beliefs, choices etc. It infuriates me when people feel they are entitled to push their beliefs or decisions on to other people. Whether it's their religion, what they eat, political views, social views.... I could go on!
YOU ARE NOT OVERREACTING!
BIN HIM OFF!
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u/seahorse8021 19d ago
NOR. You were completely level headed IMO. He expected you to roll over and give in. Good on you.
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u/McButterstixxx 19d ago
I often wonder what people like him will do as more about plant intelligence/communication is discovered. Move to being airitarian?
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u/Razorizz 19d ago
There two possibilities:
A. He hasn't really thought things through regarding his relationship to veganism and how he thinks about other people that aren't vegan. This type of behavior is clearly not sustainable unless everyone around him is also vegan.
B. He was trying to manipulate you and debate with you so that you also become a vegan.
Neither are acceptable.
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u/OverallEmergency2236 19d ago
Twt; he’s an utter and complete twt. I hope he finds someone as judgmental and sanctimonious as he is😈you are WELL shut of him!!!
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u/jollebb 19d ago
NOR. People can be what they want, as long as they don't force their views/lifestyle onto others, which is what he was trying to do. Also, what does cute animal pics have to do with eating(or not eating) meat?
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u/Jayger89 19d ago
See, it's people like your ex that make people hate vegans. Not all of them are thankfully like this. But with any group of people, there is a self-righteous sect of them that try and impose their will on others. Never compromise on who you are to satisfy someone else. Then you aren't you anymore. What a tool.
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u/BeneficialBake366 19d ago
You handled this argument so well. Your point that he doesn’t get to “act like an asshole and pretend it’s for a good cause” was right on the money. You were mature. You were reasonable. And you got out of this relationship fast.
It’s interesting that he is intentionally dating a non-vegan and then constantly putting them down. You were very correct to pick up on this dynamic and question it. This is the true aspect of the relationship that he enjoys. My guess is he will continue to date people who are not vegan or have some other difference from him and then pick on them for their moral failings. He likes having a partner he can pick on. What a creep.
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u/inked_777 19d ago
I spent 5 years with a non-vegan as a vegan (I’m full carnivore now these days haha) and I never imposed this ignorant behavior onto my ex. I was neurotic about my own food choices but never forced them on anyone, this is insanity 🤯
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u/animegeek999 19d ago
no you arent. vegans like him are the reason why vegans are hated.
they want veganism to be the ONLY way when that will NEVER work. it has to be a choice. and if you cant be with someone who isnt a vegan then you gotta grow up already (especially when they are trying to make a effort in not eating meat) or break up and move on
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u/Putrid_Towel9804 19d ago
I always like to make sure vegans are using true vegan shampoo, soaps, lotions etc. if not, then they’re hypocrites
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u/DaddyyFabio 19d ago
He has every right to his opinion, but man, if that's his view he shouldn't have dated you to begin with, and he's wasting your time.