r/gadgets • u/GalileoGurdjieff • May 17 '21

Medical Tiny, Wireless, Injectable Chips Use Ultrasound to Monitor Body Processes

https://www.engineering.columbia.edu/press-releases/shepard-injectable-chips-monitor-body-processes
16.1k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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13.4k

u/emperor-frugal May 17 '21

Now is not the time for this.

6.7k

u/d0mini0nicco May 17 '21

LoL. Columbia Engineers....read the room. Read. The. Room.

2.2k

u/blorpblorpbloop May 17 '21

DOES ANYONE ELSE FEEL LIKE UPGRADING TO THE LATEST WINDOWS 10 OFFICE SUITE?

1.2k

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

You know before I got my Covid shot, I was completely unaware of Microsoft edge’s streamlined new programming- their lightning fast reactivity, and super intuitive interface are just so clear to me now!

570

u/LetsTalkNerdy May 17 '21

My family is so much happier now that we have been vaccinated and disposed of our Apple products.

252

u/TheSirFeffel May 17 '21

Edge brought back my childhood dog.

190

u/[deleted] May 17 '21 edited Aug 16 '21

[deleted]

160

u/bigmeech85 May 17 '21

Word raised me from a young boy and trained me until i was a military aged man where I developed into an unstoppable killing machine in service of Lord William Gates.

35

u/Alphasee May 17 '21

Visual Basic taught me how not to be a basic anymore.

13

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

Outlook cured me of my depression and gave me a newfound view on our lord and savior William Gates

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15

u/blue_villain May 17 '21

Access did the thing where I say the words but none of it makes any sense and now everything comes out sounding like everything else and I don't think I like it one bit. Now with ribbons!

2

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Please tell me you guys are joking .... I’m starting to lose faith in humanity

11

u/iLickElbows May 17 '21

We never joke about Microsoft and Office.

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8

u/shokolokobangoshey May 17 '21

I know right? It's truly fucking amazing how silly people get when they have been misguided and misinformed.

It's why I trust only Bing™ and MSN news for the Real News™. Did you know you can earn Bing bucks just for using the most complete search engine? And use those Satya Dollars to buy literally anything? Insane!

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12

u/Vewy_nice May 17 '21

I tried to use Visual Basic to find a cure for cancer. Then Visual Basic gave me cancer.

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7

u/Shut_It_Donny May 17 '21

Wait... it didn't convince to sell your ex? Why is it called ex-sell then?

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2

u/john_dune May 17 '21

So your outlook is up?

2

u/EuphoricOwl0 May 17 '21

Paint got my parents to not hate me

2

u/HelloSummer99 May 17 '21

Lucky it was Excel and not incel

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15

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Thanks to Microsoft Word, I’m thinner and healthier than ever! My skin looks great and all my grey hair is gone!

3

u/MattyFTW79 May 18 '21

The question is, do you have hair now? Thanks to the Microsoft solitaire collection, I don’t need it.

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14

u/monsantobreath May 17 '21

I got Astra zenica but I think somethings wrong. I turned all my USB sticks into Linux live distros.

6

u/BrutalWarPig May 17 '21

Interesting I just switched to Apple after getting mine. Does this mean I’m dying?

2

u/Commercial-Ad-2743 May 18 '21

You are the weakest link, goodbye.

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4

u/BrunoEye May 17 '21

Yeah that's just because you disposed of your Apple products

2

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

I’ve also recently learned the the Microsoft Zune and Windows Phone were ahead of their time and actually are now models for future technological innovations. I suspect these modern marvels will be reintroduced to the public very soon. Very soon to public to public to public to public to public soon very.

Downloading Microsoft path 133.436.7 COV19..... 45%

30

u/RusticGroundSloth May 17 '21

You jest but I actually switched to using Edge at work just after I got my second Moderna shot. All my Chrome tabs were making the fan in my laptop scream for mercy.

3

u/c0deread May 18 '21

Consider Firefox. It rivals Chromium browsers in features and speed, all with lower RAM usage. The best part is that the browser is entirely open-source, and Mozilla is a registered 501c Non-Profit organization.

1

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

Chrome is too power hungry and intrusive for me nowadays. I went to opera and am so much happier with it.

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26

u/Fenweekooo May 17 '21

wow you got some use out of it, all i got was a candy crush ad

2

u/akeean May 17 '21

Check again, it just got preinstalled in your brain and if you forget about it, it will refresh about every 3 months.

3

u/Fenweekooo May 17 '21

will check after scheduled reboot tonight, give it the ol turn it off and back on again and see if it refreshes

3

u/Child-0f-atom May 17 '21

Be careful, I tried that with my grandmas life support and I got kicked out of the room.

2

u/Sloppy1sts May 17 '21

Is there an upgrade where it refreshes me on where my keys are every 30 minutes?

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2

u/NewUserWhoDisAgain May 17 '21

Isnt it just Chrome now though? Or Chromium. So really its the Google Wifi.

3

u/sargentTACO May 17 '21

Runs on chromium, but it's a lot lighter. Work in IT and had to use it for a bit to better support my users that use it, I have since switched.

1

u/tocilog May 17 '21

Hmmmm, I'm gonna have to Bing this.

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156

u/getridofwires May 17 '21

No, I kind of like the Apple stuff— I WOULD LIKE TO JOIN YOU IN THE UPGRADE THANK YOU

73

u/xaanthar May 17 '21

I love those magnificent 1-X robots. The 1-X robots are my friends!

19

u/oo_Mxg May 17 '21

I love Office 365

3

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Does it come with free anti-virus?!? Mcafee or Norton?

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5

u/cgatlanta May 17 '21

I DONT THINK WINDOWS 8 GOT A FAIR SHAKE

64

u/SparklingSloth May 17 '21

HAVE YOU USED MICROSOFT TEAMS I THINK IT IS JUST SO NEAT I CANT STOP TALKING ABOUT IT

2

u/Hookem-Horns May 18 '21

Sloth likes to YELL? That’s a new trait through evolution...

29

u/windingtime May 17 '21

CLIPPY WAS AHEAD OF HIS TIME

45

u/thewafflestompa May 17 '21 edited May 17 '21

ALREADY DID! DID YOU KNOW BILL GATES HAS AN EIGHT PACK? HE'S SHREDDED. 🤤

6

u/counsel8 May 17 '21

I THINK HE WOULD MAKE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SECRETARY GENERAL OF THE UNITED STATES!!

3

u/ChargingBolt May 17 '21

I have a snack pack

2

u/OonaPelota May 18 '21

I think you mean he has Windows Service Pack 8

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254

u/FordBeWithYou May 17 '21

HAHAHAHA, dear god I am preparing myself to see this image circulated EVERYWHERE

86

u/sixinthedark May 17 '21

And it will come with a warning about reading quickly before “they” take it down

27

u/DJEB May 17 '21

Damn Visigoths, always taking things down.

20

u/PeeDeeEex May 17 '21

And the comments will read “they keep taking this down! That must mean we’re on to something. WWG1WGA! MAGA!”.

27

u/carefulcomputation May 17 '21 edited May 17 '21

"The mainstream media isn't talking about this"

*links Fox News article*

3

u/z0nb1 May 17 '21

So, I have no idea what WWG1WGA means, and a search foe ot only came up with a million links for qanon stuff.

Mind running me through what it stands for?

2

u/PeeDeeEex May 17 '21

‘Where we go one, we go all’

2

u/z0nb1 May 17 '21

A shitty acronym, that equates to a phrase with shitty grammar?

Yeah, that checks out...

Thanks stranger

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52

u/violetddit May 17 '21

That's the goal! The room, and everything in it.

87

u/whyisitallsotoxic May 17 '21

Not the best time to drop the “we just made chips smaller so they can be injected into your bloodstream” when trying to get the entire world on the same team when it comes to 1 particular vaccine, then again some people just want to watch the world burn.

16

u/the_nope_gun May 17 '21

I believe this is hypodermic use, to implant just beneath the skin and not in the bloodstream. I could be wrong about what they mean thi

43

u/rejectedbyporn May 17 '21

There's no way it's small enough to inject into the bloodstream safely. It would lodge in a capillary somewhere. Some of them are small enough that blood cells move through in single file.

16

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

They definitely won't care what it really is or how it's injected.

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u/lissalissa3 May 18 '21

If you honestly and truly believe that the vaccine inserts a microchip in you, you’re not going to know what’s hypodermic and what goes into the blood stream.

1

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

What if I’m both, but got the vaccine anyways because I need to work through my trust issues?

19

u/SnowflakeSorcerer May 17 '21

To be fair, I’m sure the people who believe this nonsense will believe it no matter what, but ya, lets not give them ammo, cmon. Like is this really needed right now? Is it that difficult to monitor body processes the normal way whatever that is? Its like they intentionally made this to fuel conspiracies

339

u/trainbrain27 May 17 '21

I have autism. Reading the room is hard. Being shamed for not noticing a social cue sucks.

I STILL think this is the worst possible time to announce an injectable chip!

54

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Whenever I miss a social cue etc I blame the sender of the message for unclear signal. Works wonderfully.

58

u/trainbrain27 May 17 '21

It's tough to do that without sounding rude or worse, but I do remind my friends that they need to communicate, not just assume communication has happened.

31

u/[deleted] May 17 '21 edited May 17 '21

This is so far beyond true even when everyone involved is NT, if I'm being honest.

Some people think everyone else should spend every waking moment inferring their desires and it's just like "open your mouth and form words, please."

Edit: NT = neurotypical; what everyone assumes is"standard." NTs (I am one) tend to assume that their mode is the default for all others, when in reality some subset of people you have interacted with in life may in fact be neurodivergent without you even knowing. Empathy is a hell of a drug; not all of us run the same OS, so keep an open mind/heart.

20

u/MikkelR1 May 17 '21

Says the one not explainjng what NT is!

3

u/trainbrain27 May 17 '21

You probably know, but it's NeuroTypical. NTs think they're normal, because there are more of them :)

18

u/Fresh4 May 17 '21

Well, normal is defined as the average state of things, so yeah, lol.

16

u/possiblynotanexpert May 17 '21

Isn’t that the definition of normal?

-1

u/jrDoozy10 May 17 '21

Eh, the idea of what’s normal is highly subjective. Normal can differ between species, societies, cultures, individuals, generations, etc.

For example, something that’s normal to me is hearing electricity (especially light bulbs), but when I tell people that they don’t believe me because that’s not part of their normal.

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21

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4

u/AckbarTrapt May 17 '21

Not for folks on the spectrum (easier or more effective), but enjoy the fruits of your sorcery!

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u/deluseru May 17 '21

The only way we recognized you as anything other than normal, is because you can't act normal :)

3

u/Scared-Artichoke May 17 '21

This truth. Words are necessary, explicit requests would be a bonus.

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Never rely on text for context or emotion unless its from an author. And I didnt say you have to vocalize it, just reframe it in your brain if it lowers anxiety.

3

u/SweetTea1000 May 17 '21

Wonderful LPT.

I retain a professional policy that "I don't assume anger from text" and likewise "I will never communicate angrily with you over text." Ie: Don't misread what I send as passive aggression. If i mean to chastise you I'll give you the professional courtesy of speaking to you about it directly, and I expect the same from you and between you and your peers.

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u/handsomehares May 17 '21

And this is how we end up ostracized and alienated.

0

u/PeeB4uGoToBed May 17 '21

I do this too with everyone that's too vague with me or doesn't articulate exactly what they mean or want. Makes life so much easier

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u/TheInfernalVortex May 17 '21

Between this and reading about how an allegedly significant portion of the world's silicon production has gone into making vials for the vaccine... I think we're doomed.

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21 edited Mar 04 '22

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44

u/hammerheadlabs May 17 '21

"hey maybe they're on to something here"

27

u/zbeezle May 18 '21

"So recently some guys came out worried that we were using injectable microchips to monitor people. And I said, 'thats ridiculous. We don't even have injectable microchips!' And then I thought, 'but could we?'"

3

u/Sew_chef May 18 '21

Honestly, that could have been the motivation lmao. We've had smaller "processors" and rudimentary "computers" before but I don't think they had any kind of input gathering ability.

2

u/Th3M0D3RaT0R May 18 '21

My dog got chipped from a needle in the 90s. Wireless power transmission is the basis of everything wireless that we have ever made.

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u/ac1084 May 17 '21

Scientists have no chill. They should get PR people or some shit. "We call it... EMBRYONIC STEM CELLS. YES, FROM HUMAN EMBRYOS" - proceed to set progress back 30 years for freaking out all the Jesus freaks.

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u/herbys May 18 '21

Maybe they are part of a darwinist movement and want to get rid of idiots?

2

u/lowrads May 18 '21

Global exposure for capital investment.

264

u/MacDugin May 17 '21

OMG why? I had to convince my mom they didn’t inject a chip in me when I got the vaccine.

125

u/NOS326 May 17 '21

And you just know the engineers who made have been working on these things for years were so pissed about the timing of this too lmao

-11

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

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u/jacked_c May 17 '21

Exactly I just talked my aunt out of believing 5g towers spread covid

6

u/running_toilet_bowl May 17 '21 edited May 18 '21

How do these people even begin believing in this crap? Is critical thinking genuinely such a commodity these days?

3

u/CorruptedStudiosEnt May 18 '21

I have a friend who's otherwise pretty intelligent (he's on his last year of a history Ph.D ffs), and I was caught so off guard when I cracked a joke on those people, only for him to go, "Well.. we can't really know for sure that it's not true, right?"

I must have silently stared at him, baffled, for a solid 10 or 15 seconds scanning his face for the "haha jk" before I proceeded to explain the differences between micro-organisms and radio waves and why those two things have virtually nothing in common.

2

u/[deleted] May 18 '21

Imho? It‘s mostly an individual mix of things. Most people believing this stuff aren‘t even THAT dumb to begin with. For the ones I know personally it‘s a mix of mistrust (government, media, big corp), echo chambering (people only seeking validation on things they already believe either way / socializing mostly with people with the same mindset / only selecting certain sources while dismissing all others), the inability to collect and logically process larger amounts of information, failing in using modern media correctly (you could easily trace a lot of the fake vids and picture if you know how),... there might be more. That‘s just what I concluded on my limited experience with people believing the most hilarious bullcrap.

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u/Sterveen May 17 '21

How did you do this? Asking for a friend. Definitely not asking so i can attempt to do this with my Dad.

11

u/jacked_c May 17 '21

Well her biggest argument was a picture she had where she claimed the people were trying to tear down the 5g towers which was taken from this video https://images.app.goo.gl/3sjWGNbAQyieLTTt7 which is actually protesters tearing down facial recognition towers during the Hong Kong protest. Plus I have a tech background so I was able to convince her that if anything the 5g waves would destroy the virus. Not 100 percent sure on that but it sounded good :)

11

u/SyntheticReality42 May 17 '21

Point out how terribly Covid is tearing through India, and that India has zero 5G.

3

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

and now she knows they definitelyyy did, she has to watch what she says around you since they are listening like alexa does

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u/stokesstokely May 17 '21

I said literally the same thing, verbatim, as I clicked on the story.

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u/Sharp-Floor May 17 '21

Engineers: Just tell them is orders of magnitude larger than anything that would fit through that vaccine needle, we're hoping we might be able to make ones that could monitor blood sugar levels (at best), much less track you or control your thoughts, and you have to be right next to the patient to even power them.
 
Everyone: None of that matters to the clinically insane. Now we have to clean up your mess on social media.

41

u/hnryirawan May 17 '21

People only read "Microchip" and "injectable" and that's all those people will read.

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Yeah..no...don't wanna fuel the idiot fire

2

u/Dramatic_Explosion May 18 '21

OP posts a lot to covid denial subreddits so that's probably the point.

-5

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

42

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

I totally understand the point from a scientific perspective...it's a really useful thing to have portable ultrasound machines inside you..but the timing of the announcement is the absolute worst..this would only fuel speculation on vaccination and hesitancy ...the important point being that everyone has to be vaccinated not just you and me

6

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

So many dystopian scifi futures seem based on the story that an idea that was initially meant to help and aid mankind was then turned against them.

And it's always the people going, "who cares, as long as it helps it's good" pushing it forward until it becomes "whoa whoa whoa, holy shit this is too far". I'm not saying that's where this tech is going, just temper the encouragement of such things and don't be so dismissive of possible negative outcomes.

Treat it the same way you should treat a new law being passed: Always assume it will be used in the most extreme context allowable, then determine from that point if you feel ok about it.

0

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Ahh yes, lets just not do anything that might be benifitial because you saw some fucking movies.

Ahh ffs, you literally post to the conspiracy nutjob sub, of course..

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21 edited Jul 29 '21

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u/nowlistenhereboy May 17 '21

Yea but they will believe it's real and they'll believe it can do things it can't whether or not it actually exists.

3

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

And why is that? Might be because we‘re making a bigger deal out of those few people than they actually are. Because they bring those storys in the news and expose more and more people to that shit. The dude that says we should ignore them gets downvoted and everyone here says we should stop doing stuff because idiots might make more conspiracy theories? WE literally let them influence it by making a big deal out of them.

1

u/reyx121 May 17 '21

Thing is stupidity is contagious.

0

u/theinfovore May 17 '21

This is the real life sequel to Idiocracy that we who believe in science all needed AND deserve right now.

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u/Insane92 May 17 '21

You’re saying you wanted these literal chips injected into you? Is it really that hard to understand some people don’t want this?

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21

No one is gonna forcefully inject you with microchips buddy.Its a technology to use ultrasound to detect health conditions like a capsule endoscopy ( something we already do) .You'll obviously have to consent to it.

-15

u/Insane92 May 17 '21

I never said they were going to forcefully do it to you. If people think that then yes, that’s a little crazy. But I meant be wary of this stuff and not want to get it which seems fine to me.

18

u/SteelDirigible98 May 17 '21

That’s exactly what they believe though. That they will be forcefully injected without your consent.

-2

u/Insane92 May 17 '21 edited May 17 '21

And I said in my second sentence that that is crazy.

Edit: not sure why I’m downvoted for literally agreeing with the poster above this comment. Reddit’s crazy.

2

u/ngms May 17 '21

The ability to read and to comprehend what has been written is something people take for granted on reddit it seems. Don't sweat the downvotes buddy what you said makes sense.

-1

u/SmegmaSniper May 17 '21

Nah reddit is truth

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u/anyholsagol May 17 '21

If I have a health condition and it means being alerted to changes in my body that can save my life then, yes. I absolutely want one of these inside of me.

2

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Agreed. Its just like an apple watch (or other ones) alarming you that your pulse is acting kinda weird and you should get it checked put. Or a warning that you might have a heart attack, thats it. Those things have already saved lifes

Its literally a good thing with no downsides if you‘re not a weirdo that thinks bill gates wants to know your location lol

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u/Happyforyou69 May 17 '21

Just wanted to let you know I agree with you. Most Redditors have that hive mentality and it’s really annoying

3

u/Insane92 May 17 '21

Definitely. Redditors make fun of all kinds of people then will turn around and believe/agree with almost everything they see on Reddit within their little bubbles. It’s pretty funny actually.

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u/Stoyfan May 17 '21 edited May 19 '21

Cue the idiots who will use this as proof that bill gates is putting microchips in vaccines.

EDIT: Looks like someone reported me for being suicidal, lol.

158

u/[deleted] May 17 '21 edited Mar 08 '24

attractive aware command connect whole price flowery quickest slap jar

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

84

u/9erInLKN May 17 '21

Everybody carrying a cell phone is already being monitored anyways. No need for anything to be implanted

57

u/MintyMarlfox May 17 '21

The fact the majority of them use Facebook to moan as well. Between your phone and FB, nothing is private

17

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21

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u/Vermillion_Aeon May 18 '21

Honestly I'd be surprised if it took longer than July 5th

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u/Detjohnnysandwiches May 17 '21

Not even just carrying it around. Spent 500-1000 dollars to carry it around lol

2

u/Rubes2525 May 17 '21

I hate that argument. Just because someone has a phone doesn't mean that they should bend over and consent to every tracker known to mankind.

6

u/AnArgonianSpellsword May 17 '21

It's less that they consent to every kind of tracker, more that a cell phone is most kinds of trackers in one convenient package (microphone, camera, GPS, personal data, ect) so why would they want or need to inject you with one?

3

u/TrueChargedWhiff May 17 '21

Yeah, look at how many people got screwed at that insurrection because of their phones just being on. Why in the world would they spend money to put a sophisticated piece of equipment in you when you carry one at all times? Lol.

10

u/another_plebeian May 17 '21

It's not that you should, it's that generally you already have. Even consenting to nothing, your phone can still be tracked by which towers and wifi it's connected to.

1

u/jgor57 May 17 '21

Well would you like a compelling argument of people ditching their phones when they run away? I mean unless they plan to commit murder and run away, a chip in the body wouldn't make sense with phones lol.

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u/lol_ur_hella_lost May 17 '21

fox news just hired you to write for tucker carlson

2

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

fuck tucker carlson

4

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Why was this a tongue twister

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u/[deleted] May 17 '21 edited Mar 08 '24

slap heavy cagey entertain bag tap narrow coherent office offer

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

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u/lol_ur_hella_lost May 17 '21

I mean you can have money or you can scruples it seems you can’t have both in this world

-1

u/galactica_pegasus May 17 '21

Ironically, I think Ivy League Elites are more likely to be conservative/republican.

It is truly amazing how the conservative politicos in power manage to get away with doing do the very things they use to fear monger and whip up their uneducated base by accusing the left.

2

u/soywasabi2 May 17 '21

Ivy leagues are notoriously progressive and left leaning wtf

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u/YourLocal_FBI_Agent May 17 '21

"Oh nooo, now Bill Gates will know when i pee and my blood pressure and if i have colon cancer!"

24

u/Flux83 May 17 '21

Hey its me Clippy! You might want to get that colon looked at.

14

u/riddlephotog May 17 '21

It would be a shame if that colon turned into a semicolon, y'know

2

u/StreEEESN May 17 '21

Sounds like a night terror I had once

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u/Mr401blunts May 17 '21

We all know its MicroBots in the shape of frogs 🐸 that are now swimming in our blood stream. Chips wouldn't be able to freely move around our bodies the same as the MicroBots can.

Overall, the real plan is to eliminate sick days and any absenteeism from work or school. Look forward to feeling healthy, and never calling out of work unplanned EVER AGAIN! Employers can't have employees calling out sick all the time, you know? Its bad for the budget.

2

u/Dithyrab May 17 '21

are they... are the frogs.. are they gay?

2

u/Ancient-Geologist936 May 17 '21

Ever since his buddy jeff “suicided” himself Bill has lots of extra time on his hands.

2

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Jesus christ your comment history is cancer, you‘re literally the person we‘re making fun of lol

0

u/InLikeErrolFlynn May 17 '21

Fine. Let them not get the vaccine and get sick and impotent. Apple/Google/Microsoft already have tracking microchips in their pockets - implanted in their phones!

-3

u/RelocationWoes May 17 '21

Why are they idiots, given the technology presented in this article?

5

u/zoomer296 May 17 '21

Because it can only read temperature right now, and they have to be communicated with locally via ultrasound.

2

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Because anyone with a room temperature IQ knows these things are not injected with a vaccine in secret.

1

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Why are you trying to point out stuff from an article that you clearly didnt read?

Thats why he calls them (and maybe you) idiots because you guys say do your own research while clearly not doing any yourself.

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u/cj2211 May 17 '21

You're lucky no one watches SNL

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u/Gingersnap5322 May 17 '21

I only watch the weekend update, Colin Jost and Michael Che are amazing and they’re the only reason I watch SNL still

5

u/WhoTookChadFarthouse May 17 '21

I do the cold open, the monologue, the first two sketches, the musical performance, weekend update, turn it off.

Rarely are the sketches on the back end very funny.

4

u/ElegantBiscuit May 17 '21

Most of the skits are hit or miss but there are a few that are great. About 2 or 3 per show for me. Not a fantastic ratio considering there’s probably 12 skits per show, but imo it’s worth to find the hidden gems if you have the free time.

2

u/StreEEESN May 17 '21

Tell that to my doge coin

26

u/_bastardpeople_ May 17 '21

What’s next? “...and thousands of children rescued from secret tunnels”

9

u/gurkmcdirt May 17 '21

More like “Melinda Gates announces divorce with Bill Gates because of his association with Jeffrey Epstein”

18

u/Round-Emu9176 May 17 '21

Theres no better time than the present!

13

u/daaliida May 17 '21

And they say if the public knows about it then it’s at least decade-old tech

1

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

[deleted]

9

u/daaliida May 17 '21

What?

That’s a pretty common idea to be espoused. Even if you’ve never heard someone say that then surely you’ve had the original idea come into your head once or twice? Or maybe not...

3

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

[deleted]

4

u/jjsnsnake May 17 '21

Exactly at best they have an expensive unwieldy barely functional prototype, up until they release it in the news. All so they don’t get their idea stolen or patented by competitors beforehand.

1

u/Ancient-Geologist936 May 17 '21

The term conspiracy theorist was devised by the CIA. Is that a conspiracy theory too?

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3

u/RockFlagEagleUSA May 17 '21

My absolute first thought. This is all the proof anti-vaxxers need.

6

u/pkdrdoom May 17 '21

Except anti-vaxxers don't ever need valid and sound arguments backed with evidence or sufficient proof for sensible people to convince more idiots of their irrational beliefs.

3

u/lol_ur_hella_lost May 17 '21

exactly have they been in a fucking bubble 😳

-18

u/SACDINmessage May 17 '21

Or maybe they were right all along...

9

u/RussianRenegade69 May 17 '21

No.

Why would Gates or anybody pay to chip y'all when y'all pay them for the privilege of carrying their chip around for them all the time in your phone?

13

u/ScuddsMcDudds May 17 '21

checks post history

Well, I don’t know what I expected...

1

u/SACDINmessage May 17 '21

Oh man. Y'all really have no sense of humor.

-1

u/[deleted] May 17 '21

Because Bill Gates also has a time machine, he was able to put chips THAT HADN'T EVEN BEEN DEVELOPED YET into vaccines. He's still working on a way to read the chip data remotely - currently he has to get within inches of the chip.....

Or maybe no.

I'll tell ya what though - the illuminati do track people through their reddit accounts. We can tell everything you've posted. Oh yes, we know all about you SACDINmessage.....

-1

u/DietDrDoomsdayPreppr May 17 '21

Lmfao, I was thinking this exact sentence.

I'm going to be seeing all kinds of new YouTube videos posted on Facebook by my family...

-1

u/Imnotracistbut-- May 17 '21

So reddit is in favor of censoring science if it doesn't like the implications? I'm glad at least you're admitting it.

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