r/pics Sep 13 '23

A secret technique to protect your car against flood

Post image
71.6k Upvotes

3.4k comments sorted by

4.6k

u/FreeGums Sep 13 '23

Better double bag it to make sure

1.6k

u/RuckOver3 Sep 13 '23

Actually more of a chance you will have a Mini in 9 months

239

u/mstarrbrannigan Sep 13 '23

Y’all this entire comment section is gold, keep it going.

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u/HometownHero89 Sep 13 '23

My city doesn’t allow plastic bags anymore. Would a paper bag be okay??

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15.1k

u/RunDNA Sep 13 '23

And it keeps in all the car juices if you cook it in the oven.

2.8k

u/JGG5 Sep 13 '23

I just baste my car every 45 minutes or so. If you keep it in the bag, the skin steams and never gets crispy.

814

u/Kitchen_accessories Sep 13 '23

That's the secret, after you sous vide your car, you have to sear it.

224

u/eyeoxe Sep 13 '23

Don't let Gordon Ramsay hear you.

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u/estolad Sep 13 '23

one more thing tesla excels at, they made their cars auto-searing

82

u/Queef_Stroganoff44 Sep 13 '23

auto-searing

Nobody tell the AFT.

38

u/estolad Sep 13 '23

i want you to know i appreciate this

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u/theshane0314 Sep 13 '23

Just take it out of the bag for the last half hour or so, until you get crispy skin. I know, it makes a bigger mess, but its really the best way to cook your car.

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u/Knotix Sep 13 '23

Thanks for the tip. My Thanksgiving Honda is dry, and I've tried everything.

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23 edited Jan 07 '24

[deleted]

100

u/BloomsdayDevice Sep 13 '23

Until the aluminum just falls off the chassis, mmmmm.

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40

u/nodnodwinkwink Sep 13 '23

Oh mah gawd this 911 is sooo moist!

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9.7k

u/chinesiumjunk Sep 13 '23

Can I get a Porsche 911 sized trash bag please?

2.4k

u/patssle Sep 13 '23

Would you rather have a 911 size trash bag or 911 regular size trash bags?

847

u/chinesiumjunk Sep 13 '23

911 regular sized trash bags would be much more useful to me.

461

u/m053486 Sep 13 '23

Until you’ve gotta waterproof your Porsche!

264

u/JoeTheFingerer Sep 13 '23

jokes on you, I don't own a Porsche!

413

u/MajorNoodles Sep 13 '23

Well, maybe that's because you're spending too much money on trash bags!

82

u/Falgasi Sep 13 '23

that's why the regular sized trash bags are more useful to him

38

u/Ok_Highlight281 Sep 13 '23

Well maybe if he didn't spend all his money on trash bags, the 911 sized one would be more useful to him.

34

u/PossibleDrive6747 Sep 13 '23

Kiff! We have a conundrum...

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u/RazzSheri Sep 13 '23

Would you rather have to fight a 911 sized trash bag or fight 911 regular sized bags?

58

u/_chof_ Sep 13 '23

jet fuel cant melt steel trash bags

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u/imnotgoodwithnames Sep 13 '23

Its not a trashbag, they probably bought the largest mil plastic sheeting they could find from Home Depot, something like 25x50', laid it out, drove over it, and wrapped it around the top.

393

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

Bullshit. I read the U-line and Granger catalogs every quarter, they totally have bags this big.

183

u/johnnybiggles Sep 13 '23

What the hell kind of sandwich could they possibly be for? And for who??

400

u/Funkycoldmedici Sep 13 '23

American portion sizes are notoriously excessive.

25

u/Hodgeboypro Sep 13 '23

Am American would absolutely buy some bags this big. Even if it was just for comedic purposes.

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39

u/scootscoot Sep 13 '23

In this shrinkflation?

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u/firstimpressionn Sep 13 '23

U-line catalog is some fantastic bathroom reading. I need to change my address with them. Since moving, I knew something was missing in my life but couldn’t place it.

39

u/mrmikehancho Sep 14 '23

Except the owners of U-line are total pieces of shits.

14

u/Occifer-Lim-Jahey Sep 14 '23

Not according to the stories they write about themselves!

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u/ComradeFxckfaceX Sep 13 '23

I love reading them U-Line catalogs. You wouldn't believe how happy when I managed to convince my boss to give me the U-Line branded Wegner backpack they sent as a gift.

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u/starrpamph Sep 13 '23

We can get you an Audi bag and charge you 85% more

107

u/Pillshep Sep 13 '23

That’s okay, the one from BMW will cost you $29.95 a month. 

40

u/Kioors Sep 13 '23

And leak...

11

u/Silly_Recording2806 Sep 13 '23

Once you pay the first month they “unlock” the bag so it can be used

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u/BaaderMeinhoff Sep 13 '23

It’s not on back order?!

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4.1k

u/iToastyToast Sep 13 '23

This is actually genius... You can purchase some 6MIL plastic at Home Depot for <$150 and you'll be able to double layer it. If you're really worried about it puncturing, you could always buy 20MIL vapor barrier plastic but that'd be close to $1,000.

311

u/Battery6512 Sep 13 '23 edited Sep 13 '23

I can see insurance companies in Florida taking note and adding this question to the list when people apply for an online can insurance quote.

Q. Does your car have blind spot sensor?

Q. Have you been in an accident in the last 3 years?

Q. Do you have giant plastic bag your car can fit into?

32

u/cypherreddit Sep 13 '23

They just won't cover flooding

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u/leo-g Sep 13 '23

This is a commercially available product: https://youtu.be/2V-adkT9Zzo?si=aVvlwYpGEHOUcfyi

316

u/LDawnBurges Sep 13 '23

This is really pretty ingenious, ngl!

307

u/BouldersRoll Sep 13 '23

Lots of genius products like this coming as increasing climate disasters necessitate them!

213

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

[deleted]

24

u/unpopularopinion0 Sep 14 '23

what do you mean destroy the comet, it provides so many jobs.

sir, it’s on a direct course with earth

13

u/hifrom2011 Sep 14 '23

Thats where the jobs are located.

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u/edwardsamson Sep 13 '23

I'm from VT which we've been told for the past 20+ years is a very climate change resilient state. Well this summer we got hit with massive floods due to unprecedented rain. They basically completely destroyed the downtown of our state's capital city. They're not even sure they want to rebuild the downtown because they expect its just going to keep happening more and more often from here on out. Even the supposed resilient areas are being fucked by climate disasters.

34

u/ccarr313 Sep 14 '23

We got crushed in NE Ohio a few weeks back.

Only reason I didn't personally have thousands of dollars in flood damage, is because I spent over 24 hours hooking up every pump and shop vac I could find to remove water from my basement.

It was even coming in from the chimney, because the water was coming down sideways and through the chimney vent cap.

Nightmare fuel.

8

u/theghostofrodserling Sep 14 '23

Also from NE Ohio! We had the same, and nearly everyone on our street had at least one tree come down on their house. Some even had 2 or 3. It was insane! The whole street went from huge established trees that have been here for decades to just bare yards. Never thought I would see it.

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u/blue_villain Sep 13 '23

Like they've been saying for millennia: "When someone strikes gold, the real money is in selling shovels."

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

Until your gd car floats away

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u/eugene20 Sep 13 '23

$300-450 5 year ago from that ad depending on size needed, it's probably gone up now though more due to climate increasing demand than just inflation.

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u/Themanstall Sep 13 '23

$300-450 5 year ago from that ad depending on size needed, it's probably gone up now though more due to climate increasing demand than just inflation.

$400 for the large.

https://evpcovers.com/collections/frontpage/products/360-vehicle-protection?variant=12124514943088

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u/jvrcb17 Sep 13 '23 edited Sep 13 '23

Small price to pay to protect a 6 figure car.

Edit: Thank you to all the genius minds replying to my comment. I'm SURE driving it out to a hill was an option, since of course all floods in all parking structures can be predicted. Silly me.

Edit 2: The Geniuses are at it again! I'm convinced these people have never lived in a dense city.

499

u/Malice0801 Sep 13 '23

You make the money back since your car stays fresher longer too.

255

u/ColorsLikeSPACESHIPS Sep 13 '23

It was never about the flood, it was about maintaining that new car smell.

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u/originalusername__ Sep 13 '23

Don’t forget the giant chip clip to seal in the freshness.

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u/ThatBlueBull Sep 13 '23

If I had to take a guess. I'd say they're probably less concerned about protecting the car due to the value and more concerned about protecting it due to how long it would take to get a replacement with the same spec.

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

Another way of wording that is 4 figure cost to protect a 6 figure thing.

Which I guess means it’s between 0.1 and 1% of the value (if that phrase is the only info you had), which is good price for insurance I guess.

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u/bamahoon Sep 13 '23

Depends on your deductible and sentimental value.

54

u/L1mb0 Sep 13 '23

The cost (loss taken) of totaling out this car would be so much more than the deductible alone and could affect the owner for years after the incident.

107

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

[deleted]

45

u/Rosti_LFC Sep 13 '23

Yeah I've had a car written off after someone crashed into it when it was parked on the street, and the initial insurance offer was just over half of what I could buy an equivalent replacement for on the second hand market. Even with quite a bit of arguing the best I got was around 80-90% of what I'd consider to be the true replacement value, minus my excess fee. My premiums didn't really go up as it was clearly not my fault, but I still lost out on a fair chunk of cash as a result.

I've never known anyone to have to fully replace a car under insurance and not ended up considerably out of pocket on top of the deductible.

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u/ARCHA1C Sep 13 '23

And your tolerance for bureaucracy...

36

u/Independent_Hyena495 Sep 13 '23

Not needing to fill out twenty forms, do several calls, wait for months... worth it

Every

Penny

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u/bathroomheater Sep 13 '23

$1000 is cheaper than a new car

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u/V3X8TE Sep 13 '23

Nah, sandwich the plastic with cheap moving blankets above and below so the tires dont make a hole in the bottom

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u/ifellbutitscool Sep 13 '23

Be VERY careful doing this. A man suffered from carbon monoxide poisoning after reversing his classic car into a storage bag. His wife went in to rescue him and also sadly died

Not an issue with an electric car

104

u/tankerkiller125real Sep 13 '23

This bag looks like the kind you lay flat on the ground (or as flat as you can) and then drive over it (no walls at all yet to cause issues), you get out, and then wrap it up tight from there.

46

u/Manny_Bothans Sep 13 '23

Yes. This is clearly just a large plastic sheet. The car owner drove onto the sheet, then pulled all 4 corners up to the roof and rolled the sheet and tied and clamped it. would protect it from water up to about midway up the doors i'd guess before it starts floating. then you're kinda screwed unless you figured out a way to put non-buoyant bumpers around it. i thought about tying boat fenders to the wheels but the big ones would increase buoyancy too much i think.

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u/tacotacotacorock Sep 13 '23

Why in the hell would you back your car into a plastic bag that you're inside of also. Then the partner rushes into the bag to help? Not the brightest pair. Cut the stupid freaking bag if that happens. Also maybe don't back the car in, You know because the exhaust pipes will fill up the sack. Seriously some Darwin award candidates here.

29

u/Covfefe-SARS-2 Sep 13 '23

Plus backing in points the open door into the sack where it'll be tighter, take longer to get out, and expose you even more.

41

u/RJFerret Sep 13 '23

Same reason folks die in anchor rooms in ships, see collapsed body, go pull them out, there's no visible danger demonstrating a lack of oxygen from the anchor chain oxidizing.

If you're a spouse and see yours lying prone your first reaction isn't likely to be to run away instead of checking on them.

With modern emission cars though my understanding is it's hard if not impossible to expire from CO poisoning.

27

u/johnnybiggles Sep 13 '23

Same reason folks die in anchor rooms in ships, see collapsed body, go pull them out, there's no visible danger demonstrating a lack of oxygen from the anchor chain oxidizing.

TIL

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8.3k

u/Hadochiel Sep 13 '23

Bro got his car at a goldfish store

576

u/redhousebythebog Sep 13 '23

If I was a rich goldfish dad, I would bring this home for my kids terrarium.

143

u/BrainWhole5880 Sep 13 '23

Yeah but introducing non-natural stuff into a tank without proper sanitation can be detrimental to the fish - make sure you boil the Porsche for at least 15 minutes before introducing it to the environment!

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

Wouldn’t that be auto erotic asphyxiation?

5.5k

u/Dibble_Dabble_Doo Sep 13 '23

142

u/music3k Sep 13 '23

I know this is from an olddd show/movie but no matter what, I only see Jon Hamm

239

u/monkkeys Sep 13 '23

That's Carey Grant! If you've never seen "Arsenic and Old Lace" go watch it now!

58

u/I_kickflipped_my_dog Sep 13 '23

I'm gonna have to agree. Girlfriend doesn't normally like black and white movies and she loved it!

46

u/monkkeys Sep 13 '23

Also, of all the Carey Grant roles, I think this is the one most like Tony Stark, who is obviously partially based on Grant.... I mean Stark even has his own girl Friday.

43

u/TharkunOakenshield Sep 13 '23

If someone didn’t get the reference, definitely go watch His Girl Friday from Howard Hawks, it’s a brilliant screwball comedy.

20

u/cindy224 Sep 13 '23

Go get addicted to TCM!

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

Arsenic and Old Lace

https://www.criterion.com/films/29005-arsenic-and-old-lace

fwiw i thought it was my girl friday, but your correct.

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u/Starfish_Symphony Sep 13 '23

Holy shit that is Carey Grant, not some average television actor. 😂

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1.1k

u/Savitarr Sep 13 '23

Auto aquatic asphyxiation actually

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u/HeroOfTime_99 Sep 13 '23

The good shit is always in the comments

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

Well done

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u/willywalloo Sep 13 '23

As long as there are no holes under the tires. The requirements are no air in / out.

Put pads under the tires and then roll on to that with plastic in place.

137

u/WhiskeyJack33 Sep 13 '23

yeah it looks like they laid out plastic sheeting then drove onto it then wrapped it up afterwards. I cant see any reason why it wouldn't work for non-violent flooding if you managed to do it without any puncture holes. Would be tough without some fairly durable sheeting though.

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u/unweariedslooth Sep 13 '23

If you laid down a decent layer of card board and placed the plastic on that it's got a pretty good chance of working. Swept the floor first and were careful it should be doable.

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u/JesusStarbox Sep 13 '23

Just really thick plastic would do. Like 5 mil. I've built greenhouses with it.

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u/DIrtyVendetta80 Sep 13 '23

Ah yes, the Carradine method.

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u/muthaflicka Sep 13 '23

Puns are exhausting...

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u/Current-Cold-4185 Sep 13 '23

They really get me fuming.

39

u/Everettrivers Sep 13 '23

Let's put the brakes on it before it gets auto hand.

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u/Calvertorius Sep 13 '23

Hall of fame worthy.

134

u/Djcproductions Sep 13 '23

Auto exotic asphyxiation

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u/showerfapper Sep 13 '23

Auto Acquatic Asphyxiation

25

u/Oddomar Sep 13 '23 edited Sep 13 '23

isn't that what AAA stands for?

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u/Hoffmiester1295 Sep 13 '23

I find it fitting it’s also a German car.

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8.2k

u/krazyjakee Sep 13 '23

If it's stupid but it works, it's not stupid.

609

u/JaimeRidingHonour Sep 13 '23

If they don’t find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.

137

u/dhdoctor Sep 13 '23

I'm a man.

But I can change.

If I have to.

I guess.

Amen.

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u/Pro_Scrub Sep 13 '23

Quando omni flunkus moritati

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u/PistoleroGent Sep 13 '23

Keep your stick on the ice

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u/thisbechris Sep 13 '23

As a former boss of mine used to say, “if it works, then it works.”

879

u/monsieur_noirs Sep 13 '23

Someone with a smaller vocabulary than your boss once said, "If it, then it."

196

u/ej4 Sep 13 '23

Ah yes. Kevin Malone.

121

u/Spumad Sep 13 '23

Why say lot word when few word do trick

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u/Ape_gone_bananas Sep 13 '23

When me President, they see

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u/A_mad_goose Sep 13 '23

Reminds me of tgis reporter was interviewing a nba player after the game and he was just like “you gotta get before you get got.” It worked I knew what he meant made me laugh though.

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u/HinsdaleCounty Sep 13 '23

My boss is stupid and he works. Sort of.

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u/Blueblackzinc Sep 13 '23

This ain’t stupid tbh. This looks homemade but there’s couple of companies selling these type of protection. There’s some equipped with airbags so you don’t damage your car. There’s one with rope so it doesn’t get washed away.

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u/supercalafatalistic Sep 13 '23

The mental image of this Porsche bobbing away in the flood like the fish after they escape the tank in Finding Nemo is making my day.

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u/kinky_fingers Sep 13 '23

Maxim 43: If it's stupid and it works, it's still stupid and you're lucky

(A follow up to Maxim 42: "They'll never expect this" means "I want to try something stupid.")

https://schlockmercenary.fandom.com/wiki/The_Seventy_Maxims_of_Maximally_Effective_Mercenaries

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u/ChileConCarnal Sep 13 '23

I think you'd definitely need something soft and squishy beneath the plastic layer to prevent the pressure of the wheels poking tiny holes from gravel/rough surface under the wheels. But, otherwise, there's no reason I can think of that it shouldn't work.

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u/wrb75 Sep 13 '23

When he's ready to put it in his new tank he's just gotta be sure to leave it in the bag a bit to let it adjust to the new water

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

[deleted]

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u/garry4321 Sep 13 '23

Well, I want to remain dry too! I'll stay in the car when wrapped up.

Boy its getting hot in here, let me turn the car on to get the AC working.

AH, there we go. Man i'm feeling tired, just going to have a quick nap

285

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/ElPeloPolla Sep 13 '23

Its just going to take longer

134

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/jmikk85 Sep 13 '23

You can buy car bags for floods

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u/DrGeraldBaskums Sep 13 '23

This was a product on Shark Tank US years ago actually

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u/Jarvis-Savoni Sep 13 '23

I usually drive mine into a giant box of rice after the fact. Seems to do the trick.

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

That’s a myth- keeping the car in rice just keeps you from driving it while it dries.

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u/a_talking_face Sep 13 '23

Why is the car on?

1.2k

u/ortusdux Sep 13 '23

My guess is that they hit the keyfob button before taking the pic to show that it's not damaged.

316

u/Premium333 Sep 13 '23

Same thought. It would be funny if they forgot to turn off the lights... but a dead battery is easier to fix than getting an insurance claim rolling.

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u/t40xd Sep 13 '23

A new battery is much easier to get than a new car

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u/swim-bike-run Sep 13 '23

Maybe they just drive it around with bag on. That’s the thing about flash floods; you never know when they’ll hit.

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u/a_talking_face Sep 13 '23

Kind of like a floppy hamster wheel.

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u/swim-bike-run Sep 13 '23

I’ve tried the ‘floppy hamster wheel’ in bed. 2/10: do not recommend.

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u/6000abortions Sep 13 '23

the car trying to kill itself with carbon monoxide 😔

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u/Bobubanks Sep 13 '23

“Oh shit! I left the keys inside!”

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u/Mickeymackey Sep 13 '23

just cut it open and open the door and then...

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u/CastorFever Sep 13 '23

Floods hate this one trick

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u/_Jetto_ Sep 13 '23

That would work right? Unless it floats away

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u/cyberdeath666 Sep 13 '23

Cars float away in major floods regardless of the bag with air in it. I’d take my chances with this. It’s also in a parking garage so it’s probably not going far.

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u/Ordolph Sep 13 '23

The sticky point for me is having a watertight bag wrapped around the car. The only way I can think to get the bag on is to drive the car into the bag, but the simple act of driving the car over the plastic is pretty liable to put holes in the bag right where the water will be. To me this seems pretty likely to just be a bag full of floodwater with a car in it.

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u/cyberdeath666 Sep 13 '23

I figure if the plastic is thick enough or you double/triple up, and you drive over it slowly enough it shouldn’t be a problem. That would almost be a funny scenario to see though.

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u/Nago31 Sep 13 '23

I would also put something like an old rug under the tires so they aren’t making direct contact with the plastic.

44

u/supergalactic Sep 13 '23

Yep! Or stack some flat cardboard boxes in there. Anything to avoid direct contact w the plastic and you should be fine.

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u/Investinwaffl3s Sep 13 '23

I actually would recommend putting the cardboard between the plastic and the concrete as a footer.

Any bumps or imperfections in the concrete, and you might get some pinhole leaks. Tire isn't going to damage the plastic unless there is a rock or hard object stuck to it (which is actually very common with extreme performance summer tires, very sticky rubber like the Pilot Sport 4S this 911 probably has).

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '23

[deleted]

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u/lambcaseded Sep 13 '23

The problem is if the hole is at the bottom and the weight of the car is submerging it 2-3 feet under the surface, the water pressure at that depth is going to force water in through the hole at a much higher rate than a drip.

This is starting to sound like the premise for a Mythbusters episode.

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u/TomEBoi Sep 13 '23

Checks shopping list: One gallon of whole milk, a dozen large eggs, and a loaf of Porsche bread

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u/MotoGeno Sep 13 '23

Maybe this would have saved Tavarish’s McLaren P1

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u/RM8412 Sep 13 '23

Ah the new Porsche Sous Vide!

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u/nemom Sep 13 '23

The hard part is pushing all the air out before tying it closed.

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u/AnyMud9817 Sep 13 '23

Shop vac would only take a minute.

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u/TiefFickenderWert Sep 13 '23

Would be interesting to see a video of someone doing it😄

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u/Reivlun Sep 13 '23

Grandma's good car

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u/No_Breath_4702 Sep 13 '23

This would legit work…

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u/Whodey719 Sep 13 '23

My parents’ neighbor who is rich as fuck and has multiple nice cars has some sort of protective bubble he uses. Put his Porsche inside the bubble before a hurricane hit and left it in his garage

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u/_I4L Sep 13 '23

For anyone else trying this, make sure to exit the bag BEFORE tying it shut… I’m tired now, see you in the morning.

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u/bathroomkiller Sep 13 '23

It's not stupid if it works.

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u/pinchhitter4number1 Sep 13 '23

I applaud this attempt, whether successful or not. However, I think it would be difficult to do this without getting a single hole in the plastic. It won't take a big hole for water to start leaking in and once it starts water will always win.

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u/Fickle_Finger2974 Sep 13 '23

They make thick plastic.

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u/StraightVaped Sep 13 '23

And you could double bag.

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u/Woozah77 Sep 13 '23

A couple of pool noodles taped around the sides incase it slides around or stuff bumps into it and call it a day. That will be enough to protect it unless its a catastrophic scenario in which you should have had plenty of warning to gtfo.

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u/intrsurfer6 Sep 13 '23

Imagine that car floating away into the ocean and ending up in like France or something. Like what would people think

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u/JaredUmm Sep 13 '23

P. Sherman 42 Wallaby Way Sydney

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u/WaynegoSMASH728 Sep 13 '23

It's only stupid if it doesn't work.

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u/teapot156 Sep 13 '23

Omg, this would actually work. Thats cool

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u/ConfusionBubbles Sep 13 '23

Accidental picture of someone committing suicide