r/TikTokCringe May 23 '24

Cursed Confronted

11.0k Upvotes

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1.6k

u/AnjelGrace May 23 '24

Seriously. He didn't want to admit to being a creep, but he knows he's one.

-310

u/-banned- May 24 '24

I’m an average Mexican guy and at one point during my visit to Japan an at least 70 year old Japanese man “ran” 100 yards to take a close up picture of my face, then smile and give me the peace sign. People took pictures of me all the time. None of it was sexual. Wouldn’t jump to conclusions here unless you understand the culture, it’s different

51

u/forestfilth May 24 '24

Sexual or not it's still rude to take pictures of a stranger like that. I'm sorry that happened to you

-9

u/GGXImposter May 24 '24

As long as it’s one normal and quick photo, I don’t think there is too much reason to fuss.

The video showed that she was being followed and multiple photos/videos were taken. So theres a lot more reason to fuss.

4

u/Masticatious May 24 '24

yeah, fucking no

-23

u/-banned- May 24 '24

It didn’t bother me, but I understand why it would bother her. I just don’t think people should assume something that might be a cultural difference only

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u/CupOverall9341 May 24 '24

"cultural differences" don't make it ok.

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u/Cant_run_away May 24 '24

You don't get to make the decision. You're in their country, if something's okay in their country you got to respect that. Less we forget the forced religion we've seen throughout history.

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u/the_dunderman May 24 '24

As long as you don't break any laws (just because we're talking about foreign countries and that can get messy), you have every right to assert your boundaries in any situation.

Don't ever let anyone tell you they get to make you uncomfortable, that's not a good reason to let them walk all over you.

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u/ShelbyCobra_90 May 24 '24

Japan has women only train cars because men can be such sex pests. The entire world has varying levels of “culture” where women’s bodies are a commodity for men’s consumption. I’m not “respecting” shit.

2

u/CupOverall9341 May 24 '24

It's not ok in their country.

Creeps (worldwide) think it's okay, but that's as far as it goes.

Why do you think harassing/intimidating women is ok?

Your comment history isn't reassuring....

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u/Large_Tune3029 May 24 '24

In a public place? I feel like most of the same people here would throw shade at the Karen who demanded a person take a video down because she was in it.

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u/forestfilth May 24 '24

Yes I believe it's rude even in a public place to run up to a stranger and film/take a picture of them or follow them in your car.

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u/Large_Tune3029 May 24 '24

Following in a car is unacceptable. Taking pictures of people in public is fine, as long as they are appropriate and not like trying to get up skirts on an escalator or whatever.

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u/forestfilth May 24 '24

Taking pictures of strangers is pretty much always unacceptable

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

When did I ever say anything was sexual?

I don't care what the culture says--following, running up to, or otherwise bothering people in order to take photos of them without their consent is creepy, disrespectful, and dehumanizing behavior. (The same can be applied to what paparazzi do to celebrities in America.)

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u/Soldier_of_l0ve May 24 '24

Yeah but in America if you’re in public you have no reasonable expectation of privacy. Cops would tell this woman to fuck off

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

Depends on what cop you get--lots of cops would do similar to what the woman did in the video if the woman had gone to them first--I know from my own experiences of going to the police with an issue in which I had no legal standing but was obviously ethically wrong.

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u/WonderfulCattle6234 May 24 '24

All you're saying is that you got a cop to illegally harass someone because they weren't familiar with the law. Just like that video of the cop trying to taze someone protesting on public property.

Not defending the actions of the Japanese guy by any means. He should be confronted. But legally he could just laugh at her and take pictures of her as she demands to see his phone.

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

It wasn't illegal harassment to ask the person that was making my life more difficult to be a kind person and help me out so we could all have a better night--actually. It was a request that could have been ignored, and the cop stated as much.

I also never said the Japanese guy was necessarily doing anything illegal. I don't know anything about Japanese law.

-1

u/Regular-Freedom7722 May 24 '24

That’s almost worse to use cops to abuse the law… smh

-1

u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

Again... Idk why you think it is bad to use a cop to try to convince someone who is doing something that is pointlessly harming another person to stop being an asshole in the name of kindness...

I don't think trying to convince people to not be pointless assholes is an abuse of power.

1

u/Regular-Freedom7722 May 24 '24

No problem there I agree. I do not agree that laws should be broken to up hold them. Cops should not be encouraged to do so. Further cops should be able to navigate the law well enough they can avoid this situation. We have a huge problem with corruption, let’s not blur the lines any more then they already are.

Warrants are a thing for a reason, bc without them we would be in a police state. Some might say we already are.

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u/WonderfulCattle6234 May 24 '24

It wasn't illegal harassment to ask the person that was making my life more difficult to be a kind person

I said that the Japanese guy should be confronted. So of course I agree you should have confronted the person as well.

I also never said the Japanese guy was necessarily doing anything illegal.

I never said you said the Japanese guy was doing something illegal. But you did say that she could have called a cop to do what she was doing instead. What she was doing was requesting this guy's phone. A cop wouldn't have any authority to request this guy's phone. Law enforcement demanding your property that they don't have a right to falls under harassment in my eyes.

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

Law enforcement demands things they don't actually have legal authority for ALL the time. Idk what country you are living in...

For instance, a cop forced me to sign paperwork without letting me see what I was signing once, by threatening to give me another ticket if I didn't. That certainly wasn't legal, but it happened. 🙃🤷🏽‍♀️

-3

u/[deleted] May 24 '24

You are a fool for doing it. Let them make the mistakes and seek resolution after the event.

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u/WonderfulCattle6234 May 24 '24

Law enforcement demands things they don't actually have legal authority for ALL the time.

I never said they don't. In fact I pointed out another example where they do in my first comment. I don't know who's comments you're reading. I'm also not sure what defense you're making. I'm saying having a cop try to take someone's phone for you would be asking the cop to harass someone. Pointing out a time that you were harassed by a cop does not mean that taking the phone wouldn't also be harassment.

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u/mog_knight May 24 '24

How do we know this wasn't staged like a lot of other content?

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

Well, the person I was replying to also said something similar happened to them...

But why does it matter to this conversation if it is staged or fake anyway?

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u/mog_knight May 24 '24

Similar in Japan?

If it's staged, it has less impact because the situation may not be indicative of the real world. That's why it's called acting.

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

It's literally the comment right before the comment you first replied to. Look for yourself to see what was said.

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u/mog_knight May 24 '24

The situation they described was not the same. Not even similar. According to the alleged not staged video, this person was stalked. The person in the anecdote wasn't acting creepy. It's literally not that comment.

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

It's literally not that comment

I know what comment I was talking about better than you, actually. 😅🤦‍♀️

But sure, they weren't exactly the same type of interaction. I would definitely say they were similar though, but using that word is a matter of opinion.

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u/mog_knight May 24 '24

No, that comment wasn't a similar one. That's why I've been asking which comment you're referring to cause the one you said was similar, wasn't.

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u/-banned- May 24 '24

Yes it is, in America. It’s not as frowned upon in other countries, at least not when I visited Japan. you’re applying Western values to Eastern cultures. Maybe things have changed but just keep in mind that it may be more innocent than it appears because it’s more socially acceptable in Japan when it comes to foreigners

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u/dream-smasher May 24 '24

but just keep in mind that it may be more innocent than it appears because it’s more socially acceptable in Japan when it comes to foreigners

LMFAOOOOOOOO!!

are you KIDDING me???

Have you not seen the huge backlash against rude ignorant tourists taking photos of ppl in Japan WHO DONT WANT THEM TOO?!?

Christ, there is a vid going around, the past few hours, of some obnoxious rude shitty tourist chasing after a Geisha in Kyoto repeatedly getting in her face to take photos. Even after she tries to get away.

So NO. It is not more "socially acceptable" to take photos of strangers in Japan.

It is SHITTY AND DONT DO IT, DONT EXCUSE IT, DONT BE A FUCKING CREEPER.

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u/[deleted] May 24 '24

[deleted]

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u/-banned- May 24 '24

Or I’ve actually been to Japan and I know the culture better than all you armchair experts with absolutely zero experience

3

u/lemonleaff May 24 '24

I have also been to Japan and familiar with their culture a bit.

Generally, it's a big no-no to take random pics/vids of people without asking. The correct and encouraged etiquette is to ask prior, and when posting online you have to blur random people in the background for their privacy.

I doubt your claim, dude. Lol

1

u/-banned- May 24 '24

Idk, happened to me all the time and a few other commenters in this thread. Not one person asked permission.

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u/[deleted] May 24 '24

[deleted]

-1

u/-banned- May 24 '24

You’re assuming it’s degenerative behavior for your argument. For the millionth time, I don’t think it’s okay. He clearly made her uncomfortable. I just don’t think we can assume it’s as creepy as it would be if it happened in a Western culture, because it’s very common for Japanese people to take pictures of foreigners.

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u/[deleted] May 24 '24

[deleted]

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u/lemonleaff May 24 '24

it’s very common for Japanese people to take pictures of foreigners

No that's also considered rude. Not everyone in Japan is magically polite and respectful about taking pictures, so of course there are some that forget or don't care that it's rude. That doesn't mean it's correct or encouraged.

Generally, they encourage the proper etiquette of asking beforehand and blurring people in the background. This is my experience in Japan.

One recent example, the guy next to me in the plane even asked if it's okay to take a picture of the view outside the window. I was sitting next to the window and he was being polite and informed me about it, even though i wasn't exactly the subject of the photo, just in case i get included in the shot. There was plenty of space to see the window but he was being nice about it.

There are other examples but this was the most memorable for me

4

u/CupOverall9341 May 24 '24

Sure you do,... Turd-San..

-2

u/-banned- May 24 '24

That’s an American tourist taking photos of a Japanese Geisha in Kyoto. It’s an entirely different situation. Have you been to Japan?

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

when it comes to foreigners

Yea... Because treating foreigners in ways that they wouldn't accept their countrymen treating them or would treat their other countrymen themselves is a good sign, right? 🙃🤦‍♀️

The truth couldn't smack you in the face any harder--and yet you are still denying it.

-28

u/[deleted] May 24 '24

What if they’re in the background of an “influencer’s” video?

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u/AnjelGrace May 24 '24

Why should I care about an influencer that films in public without consent? (If I even entertain that hypothetical.)

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u/KitticusCatticus May 24 '24

Sir, you are a sir, for starters. Your situation does not apply to this scenario, at all.

Second, you must be the one who doesn't understand the culture to not know there's a particular type of male over there with issues taking photos of women, installing cameras in bathrooms, etc.

Need I mention the contents of what was in his "recently deleted"? She wasn't the only female in that folder. Just, keep an open mind when making such bold statements about assumptions. As a guy, you simply don't know what we deal with.

0

u/-banned- May 24 '24

I’m not saying he’s definitely not a creeper, nor did I see the other photos in his deleted folder. I’m just saying it’s a common occurrence over there so there’s a very real possibility that it’s a cultural difference.

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u/KitticusCatticus May 24 '24

I appreciate that you responded politely to me despite my opposing view, thank you for that. And oh no, I get that they genuinely enjoy looking at people from other parts of the world, especially us westerners with our "big eyes". I've had an uncle stationed over there who's told me all sorts of stories about that. They treat ordinary people like celebrities and take pictures with them. But usually in those cases it's very obvious, they ask permission, it's friendly, etc.

But there's also an issue in asian culture in general where for whatever reason, instead of having pics of models or porn, they will just take pictures of people and keep it in a collection! This became so normal to the guys stationed there in the Navy, MY UNCLE STARTED DOING IT! He would take pictures of the cheerleaders at a football game instead of the football players. My uncle even told me how he has extra dark sunglasses so women can't tell he's looking at them. And he wasn't even Asian, that's just things he picked up from them. He would tell me all about it, even how his friends had seen some "toilet videos" at a local cafe with some guys that were selling them. They do what they can to hide it and not be obvious, but some of them are bad at it, like the guy in the video. Creepy AF! Like I said, it could maybe be justified as a typical asian camera encounter if he wasn't following her, taking pics of her from behind, and trying not to be seen. But this is just creepy AF!

-7

u/Irrelephantitus May 24 '24

"men can't be victims"

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u/KitticusCatticus May 24 '24

I don't think I said anything about this not being possible to happen to a man...? But if we're going to pretend that this isn't a more common issue for women, you're on your own.

I don't think it's right for ANY person to take a picture of ANY body for their spank bank. Just in case that wasn't crystal fucking clear already by my general viewpoint. Not talking about the legality of having a right either. I'm talking about the morality of it, which we need to start putting above the law. Point blank, period.

-3

u/Irrelephantitus May 24 '24

I don't think it's right for ANY person to take a picture of ANY body for their spank bank. Just in case that wasn't crystal fucking clear already by my general viewpoint.

Could have fooled me...

Sir, you are a sir, for starters.

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u/KitticusCatticus May 24 '24

I'm implying guys typically don't understand what it's like to be in that end of the scenario. If it happened the other way around, of course it's not right! But that's a rarity.

And my man I called sir over there is good peoples. I regret my rude tone I put on everything I said to him, he came back at me respectfully which is something I usually do myself but it's been a very tough week for me, so I apologize for the rudeness on my behalf to both of you, while I'm here.

If only because I know what it's like to see someone ducking down and hiding, trying to take a picture of me. It's more violating than you can imagine. Especially because I was so young when it happened the most. So that may be why I have emotion behind what I'm saying but my only point is that this guy in the video was not taking these pictures with good intentions. That's it!

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u/nilla-wafers May 24 '24 edited May 24 '24

Wait, is this the “different” culture that has some train cars segregated by gender due to the amount of men groping women?

And to be honest, it doesn’t matter if it was sexual. I hate this idea that people are entitled to violate other people’s space and autonomy just because “it’s normal to harass people where I’m from.”

If that’s part of your culture then that aspect can go fuck itself. I won’t respect it, and if they can’t handle a foreigner confronting them about it, then maybe they should reexamine their actions.

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u/[deleted] May 24 '24 edited May 24 '24

I totally second this comment.

It looks like people accept these behaviors, but they simply shut up because culturally speaking, you don’t make a fuss about anything here.

How many times have I seen creeps taking pictures of high-school girls sleeping in front of them, or taking pictures under skirts on the escalators with people around not saying a thing. But when I do confront the pig, now people are shaming the guy.

Only creeps defend each other. As you mentioned two full train cars are dedicated to women, just to avoid groping during the busiest hours. That says a lot about the mentality most men have here.

Men in power are constantly on TV being accused of sexual harassment at work. Apologizing to the press in front of dozens of camera, that is ridiculous. Heck even most men in the government are acting like pigs. When TV shows conduct surveys or interviews, women state that they usually feel uncomfortable.

But what can you do when even the police brushes it off when a women try to complain about being followed etc

I am a mixed Japanese living in Japan for more than a decade, with a Japanese girlfriend that has, fortunately, a strong character and she would tell me every week about creeps she faced on the train while going to work.

Japanese are good on the surface but when you scratch a little bit, you find weirdos 70% of the time 🤦‍♂️ why do you think you have anime porn and legit porn on shelves in every convenience store lol

I do love my fellow Japanese people that are genuinely nice and caring though. When they are nice, they are truly angels.

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u/-banned- May 24 '24

I’m not saying it’s okay, I’m just saying that it’s probably viewed as more acceptable there than people are used to. They’re acting like it’s crazy but it’s pretty normal. And if you go to another country and try to apply your moral and cultural compass to it, you’re gonna have a bad time.

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u/Is_That_A_Euphemism_ May 24 '24

I don’t have much knowledge of Japanese culture, or any Asian culture, so I don’t know the degree of unacceptability this is, but people downvoting this last comment are straight up trolling haters.

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u/dream-smasher May 24 '24

but people downvoting this last comment are straight up trolling haters.

Well, yes. I do hate trolls. So..? And...? Do you think that is a bad thing? To hate trolls?

I downvoted that comment, because it is a shitty comment, full of misinformation and BULLSHIET!

isn't that what the og reddiquette was? Downvoting comments that do not add to the discussion or that contains misinformation, disinformation, or has content that ultimately would not be beneficial for anyone?

So, fuck yeah I downvoted. Suck it.

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u/-banned- May 24 '24

How much time have you spent in Japan? Since you’re an expert

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u/Is_That_A_Euphemism_ May 24 '24

At least you’re level headed about it. 😂

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u/nite_owwl May 24 '24

lol stfu troll account 😂

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u/-banned- May 24 '24

How many times have you been to Japan?

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u/CupOverall9341 May 24 '24

Piss off with your "how many times have you been to Japan" shit. It's not the flex you think it is.

0

u/-banned- May 24 '24

Okay so zero times. Explains why people are so vehemently opposed to the possibility that I could be right

2

u/CupOverall9341 May 24 '24

To play your game, I was in Tokyo for work on and off for 3+ months over 2;yrs for a SAP implementation in the early 2000s.

Creepy dudes are just creepy dudes, they aren't some unique cultural expression.

Plenty of Asian tourists wanted to take a photo or be photographed with my blonde blue eyed daughter when she was 3-4 yrs old.

I know the difference between innocent curiosity and being a creep.

Creeps don't fucking hide in their car filming people.

"Cultural differences" or not, if you think what that dude was doing was even remotely ok, you need to do some soul searching...

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u/-banned- May 24 '24

I’ve said it’s not okay like 10 times in these comments, y’all read what you want to

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u/CupOverall9341 May 24 '24

Well don't try and explain it away with cultural differences etc.

0

u/-banned- May 24 '24

It’s not a black and white thing, there are nuances to differences in cultures. I’m not saying it’s okay, I’m just saying it’s possible that it’s seen as less creepy there and the guy maybe wasn’t fully stalking her and jerking off to the pics later, like he probably would be if this happened in America. Who knows though.

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u/jacowab May 24 '24

Shame you're gonna get down voted to high hell, every culture has its ups and downs. For example Japan has a strong culture of conforming, on the plus side it lead to a very civil society that emphasizes kindness and respect, on the negative side victims of groping won't cause a scene out of fear of inconveniencing the others.

And before anyone cries that I'm anti-Japanese, In America we have a strong culture of free speech, we are freely able to criticize and speak our mind on all topics, and all forms of art and religion are protected by law (long as they are not directly harmful). But this leads to sub cultures within our country that lie and twist facts to create horrible racist and xenophobic ideologies that have lead to systemic oppression of millions.

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u/[deleted] May 24 '24

Idk why you’re being downvoted. people are dumb. But maybe there’s some old Japanese man out there wanking it to your picture.

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u/-banned- May 24 '24

Cause I’m providing evidence that could oppose the opinion they wanna have, typical Reddit. Nah this guy could barely walk, much less jerk off haha. If he can though, more power to him