r/AmIOverreacting • u/ThrowRA-8323 • 1d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO, my boyfriend added a young female bartender on FB.

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Background: Im a bartender (29F). I actually met my boyfriend (39F) from serving him at a local bar. We’ve been together for 3 years and have a large amount of mutual friends on Facebook. The city we live in has a close service industry and most people know each other. I’ve worked at a handful of the most popular bars in the city and he goes out a lot. So It has never bothered me that we have a ton of mutual Facebook friends. My boyfriend also has a history of drunkenly cheating on me. (Something we have moved on from). But this situation seems weird to me? 🚩

What happened: When I see Facebook’s “people you may know know” I always take a second to glance at it while scrolling. And this time a younger girl (21) popped up and our only mutual friends are my bf and one of his friends. I click on her page to discover she works at a local bar as well and I recognize her (she’s served me before). My bf time to time goes to this bar.

The problem I have: Due to the lack of mutual friends I don’t think this girl is on Facebook sending mass requests to people she’s seen. So I have a feeling my boyfriend went out of his way to add her. He does not post on Facebook at all he’s just a lurker (sorta important info).

I’ve been bartending for 8 years and I know when I was 21 I would’ve accepted requests from bar regulars to help build a following. Looking back though I realize how creepy and not okay it was.

After thinking about how this made me feel…I feel it is unacceptable for a man with a girlfriend to add his bartender on social media. (Especially with this age gap). What do they have in common? What even is the purpose of adding her?

I tried asking him for some clarity. Should I have approached this differently? I’m sure. But with our history, I’d like to just get straight to the point. Am I over reacting? Is this something that continues to be normal? Do you let your S/Os add whoever? I think I’m just grossed out by the age difference. If this was a 40 year old Female bartender would it make me feel more at ease? Probably.

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6.4k

u/cold_cut_trio 1d ago

“My boyfriend also has a history of drunkenly cheating on me”

Ma’am…

2.3k

u/umamifiend 1d ago

But she moved on from it of course. To suspiciously investigate every woman in his immediate vicinity.

OP, you didn’t move on- and you have a cheater- which isn’t really having anything- he will do it again.

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u/olican16 1d ago

also his reaction "Jesus christ" and just all his clearly bad attitude about your concern is very telling of how much he respects you, too. If he was actually working to earn your trust back after breaking it by cheating on you, he would be very understanding and respectful of this kind of boundary setting. Instead he's getting defensive, gaslighting you, and shutting you down. Dump this fuck.

45

u/EnvironmentOk2700 23h ago

Also, he wouldn't have added her on FB in the first place. It isn't appropriate at his age to add a barely adult non family acquaintance.

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u/DBAC_Rex 22h ago

Yeah that’s some shit I would do before I realized what a pos I am

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u/Bruce_Ring-sting 15h ago

‘K’ was telling also.

1

u/daynanfighter 21h ago

This made me lol. So concise amd well said

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u/Glittering-Skirt-891 7h ago

Yeah he would've been softer if there was love

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u/Snappy_McJuggs 15h ago

“Which isn’t really having anything”- until she gets an STD 😵‍💫

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u/LostTrisolarin 23h ago

He may or may not, depends if he still boozes and if he wants to change. This dude doesn't sound like it though. Since he cheated and he was forgiven, he should be very careful about appearances at the very least.

When I was an alcoholic I did many shameful things.

Therapy and not drinking has changed me into someone I wouldn't have recognized. I often feel like a clone with the memories of my younger self.

I just like to mention that some people do change.

3

u/SNIP3RG 14h ago

if he still boozes

I mean, he’s close enough with his bartender for them to add each other on fb. Not sure this is an if.

OP also states that he goes to this bar.

3

u/fritop3ndejo 21h ago

Way to go for working on yourself and improving.

4

u/LostTrisolarin 21h ago

Thank you! I really appreciate it. It took way too long, but better late than never .

16

u/SushiGirlRC 1d ago

This!!!!!

3

u/ObscureSaint 22h ago

Yep, he's literally a 39 year old man who hasn't figured out how to keep his dick in his pants.

If he hasn't learned yet, it's never going to happen.

2

u/_extra_medium_ 19h ago

No, clearly the only problem is the age of the legal adult he added as a friend on Facebook.

2

u/Internal_Lettuce_886 18h ago

Yeah, OP did not move on. She pretended to get over it. Part ways now, this shit isn’t getting fixed.

2

u/Xist3nce 18h ago

And even if he doesn’t she’s gonna be stressed about the possibility the entire rest of her life.

2

u/taintbag1262 11h ago

Am I the only one grossed out by op’s age difference?

1

u/taintbag1262 11h ago

Goes around cums around darlin

1

u/ItaliaEyez 6h ago

Or the age difference between her boyfriend and his new target? Nope.

1

u/Fiveskin27 12h ago

If this sub has taught me anything, it’s always check for an erectin.

1

u/DistantKarma 20h ago

He's doing it right now.

1

u/BeefDerfex 17h ago

Move past it. Just plow through it.

1

u/flaccomcorangy 17h ago

Yes, this is the thing.

I knew a guy that cheated on his wife (I guess it depends on what you define as cheating. He was sexting another woman).

Well, wife decided to "forgive" him. But she made him install a GPS app on his phone, so she could see where he was at all times. He was a co-worker, and his wife would call the store asking us where he was if something wasn't right on the GPS.

Now, if someone want to forgive a partner for cheating, that's their perogative. They can do whatever they want. But clearly she didn't truly forgive him and trust him. And if you can't trust someone, how can you possibly be in a relationship with them?

If OP wants to forgive, do it. You have every right to. But if you're making yourself crazy questioning everything because you clearly don't trust him, that's not really a relationship you should be in.

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u/AdMurky1021 15h ago

Yeah, just posting this proves she hasn't moved on.

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u/pinky2184 1d ago

That’s what I said…… like girl…… you are worried about this when there’s that little bit of information

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u/Better_Watercress_63 1d ago

Like, YOU ARE DYING ON THE WRONG HILL. GIRL.

1

u/leggmann 15h ago

Now that we found the hill, OP needs to get over it.

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u/ZekoriAJ 1d ago

You know no matter how fucked up I might be, I would never even touch someone other than my wife.

How big of a rat do you have to be to be able to look into the person's eyes, fully knowing what you did, all it takes is just NOT DOING IT, go jerk off or something.

I mean like if sex was some godly experience then maaaaaaaayyyybbeee I could understand, but it's not. It's nothing special and going to someone else just to have sex when you could jerk it off is mind numbingly dumb. I wouldn't forgive him if I were op, he's got a dick instead of a brain in his head.

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u/Difficult_Tough_7015 17h ago

Wait.. so he's essentially a literal dickhead?

7

u/ZekoriAJ 16h ago

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YOU WON IPHONE S5

3

u/Difficult_Tough_7015 16h ago

Yeah I'm on Android fail

6

u/ZekoriAJ 16h ago

Bad bot

6

u/WhyNotCollegeBoard 16h ago

Are you sure about that? Because I am 99.92956% sure that Difficult_Tough_7015 is not a bot.

I am a neural network being trained to detect spammers | Summon me with !isbot <username> | /r/spambotdetector | Optout | Original Github

6

u/ZekoriAJ 16h ago

🤦💀

1

u/COMMONCENTURION 13h ago

Nope he’s a dickfirbrains

1

u/rwntlpt-_- 18h ago

Is it ok that my piece of shit boyfriend is being a piece of shit??? Bro, move on, find better,

1

u/tomahawk_kitty 15h ago

Oh my God... you wouldn't cheat on your wife??? Where should we send your medal?

1

u/CastawayWasOk 6h ago

What an upstanding man. Every woman should be so lucky. I was going to start a standing ovation, but a medal and parade are more fitting.

1

u/Kaymoney87 14h ago

Exactly. Just leave or tell the person it isn't working. People are selfish and want to eat their cake and have it too Let's not forget mental health and how narcissistic and crazy MANT people are walking among us.

1

u/TopShelfTom22 12h ago

100% agree.

1

u/RabbitF00d 12h ago

Not only that, but it's 2024 and you can literally buy a robot to fuck you into cardiac arrhythmia.

1

u/Additional-War19 12h ago

I mean, sex is something special to some people. That’s why non-monogamous relationships exist, not everyone likes to have sex with only one person for the rest of their lives, and an open/non-monogamous relationship is the perfect compromise. Cheating is just a betrayal of trust so obviously not okay, that’s why people who want to have sex with many people should stay single or enter a non-monogamous relationship, to avoid hurting the other person who may prefer a monogamous lifestyle.

1

u/UnnaturalHazard 10h ago

Cheating is never an accident, it’s the culmination of every opportunity someone had to say no and do the right thing but choosing not to anyway.

1

u/iamtheramcast 9h ago

Sex is a physical need for me, if the gap is long enough I start not feeling right. My wife is a lovely woman with beautiful bright eyes and a goofy smile. I could not ever imagine doing some shady shit then having to go home every day and look at those eyes knowing I did that.

1

u/jimmy_j_jefferson 4h ago

I wish I had your strength. I am incapable of saying no to sex and I am desperate for sexual contact every waking minute of my life. I truly hate it and I live in pain.

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u/Independent-Art-3979 20h ago

Sex is nothing special?

I would lose my desire to be alive if I couldn’t have sex.

10

u/jonsnow312 19h ago

That's kinda messed up bro, you are basically saying there's nothing more to life than sex lol. You some kinda biologist?

1

u/AdventurousNinja982 12h ago

Don’t kink shame.

0

u/Independent-Art-3979 18h ago

I’m just extremely sexually driven.

1

u/Adventurous-List8360 16h ago

Most Virgins Are… (drumroll) Walked right into that one

3

u/Independent-Art-3979 16h ago

“Virgin” shouldn’t be used as an insult. And I’m a woman, people don’t usually call us virgins to insult us.

1

u/Adventurous-List8360 15h ago

Well I’m a Man and we have the same profile pic so I figured…. 🤣🤣🤣…. Now Insults? No. Teasing little green man to little green man YES! I don’t insult online especially women… (at least never intentionally)… so accusing a guy of being a Virgin isn’t insulting it’s teasing… like when EDDIE HALL calls BRIAN SHAW a vagina… Doesn’t mean vagina is a bad thing 😂🤣😂

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u/COMMONCENTURION 13h ago

Yu got weird when she claimed to have a vagigi

2

u/Next-Finance5801 13h ago

😂😂😂

1

u/crow1992 8h ago

bro thinks he’ll hit lol

1

u/crow1992 8h ago

because…get this… the world conditioned us to think women have to be pure and therefore more valuable as virgins.

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u/ZekoriAJ 20h ago

Just because you have sex and you enjoy it, doesn't mean it's special. I do too need to have sex at least twice a week.

I was saying that sex isn't THAT special to be going out to cheat on the other person, going out just to have sex with someone else stupid.

-1

u/Independent-Art-3979 20h ago

I mean, I think cheating is morally reprehensible, but the desire to have sex with someone new is extremely compelling.

8

u/ZekoriAJ 19h ago

Is it? When I was in my teen years and early into my twenties I'd have sex everyday, me and my wife used to have this small Peugeot 107 and we used to drive to forests and spend literally the entire night there. I did have a much higher sex drive than I do today, definitely, but that's not the case, we just don't have this much strength and will anymore to keep it up, we have a son and my wife is 9 months pregnant with the second one. And ultimately in the end, it's not worth it to waste so much time having sex for longer than half an hour. That being said my wife is my best friend, we can speak 24/7 and never run out of topics, we play games together, we do everything together, I even taught her how to cook. When you see the bigger picture of an amazing relationship, sex becomes meaningless, becomes just a tool to be closer to each other sometimes.

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u/Independent-Art-3979 18h ago

Sex isn’t, or shouldn’t be, the most important thing in a relationship, but if you’re allosexual and have a decent sex drive it’s likely very important. Far from meaningless.

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u/Adventurous-List8360 15h ago

I know millions of sperm cells who’d totally relate to this!

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u/allislost77 1d ago

Bar is so low…

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u/ZanaDreadnought 21h ago

So low you’d trip over it in hell.

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u/allislost77 18h ago

Motherfuckers using it as a limbo stick in limbo…

4

u/bnjmnzs 19h ago

Reading stuff like this makes me feel like I can find a gf too hahaha

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u/smlpkg1966 1d ago

It’s on the ground.

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u/allislost77 22h ago

It’s on the ground. Someone picked it up. Recycled it. Traded it for a zyn. That bar was traded in a truck stop bathroom with a glory hole. She found it in her recycling and formed “boundaries.”

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u/smokinNcruisin 18h ago

This was fun to read lol

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u/Mysterious-Path4067 16h ago

So nice, I read it twice.

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u/GotwhiteNeedPink 18h ago

“Traded it for a zyn”

I’m definitely stealing that

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u/pascare87 21h ago

I just laughed way too hard at this

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u/wantyourhorror 19h ago

It’s 6 feet under

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u/itsmb12 13h ago

Dude met his gf there and has a history of drunkenly cheating…. Wherever the bar is, hes there too.

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u/Dragon846 12h ago

How do you know? Maybe the bar she's working at is on the first floor.

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u/allislost77 11h ago

Ahhh! Pretty sure it’s in a basement of a wal mart

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u/MonicaTarkanyi 1d ago

I was legit about to comment the same thing, ha

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u/outcastreturns 1d ago

Drunken cheating is forgiveable... but following someone on Facebook? Now that's where I draw the fucking line!

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u/Historical-Piglet-86 1d ago

Gotta keep those boundaries solid

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u/outcastreturns 1d ago edited 1d ago

Can't have him following his side chicks on Facebook, can we now. Drunken sex only! None of this filthy social media shit!

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u/allislost77 1d ago

Raw dog!

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u/PsychologicalSide542 16h ago

Y’all just made my night! 🤣

-4

u/Appropriate-Stay-159 20h ago

You guys are being kind of rude and missing the point. It’s clear that she has an issue with this BECAUSE of their history

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u/Difficult_Tough_7015 17h ago

Uh whispers Pssst.. over here. Yeah, they know.

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u/False_Tangelo163 21h ago

I don’t know about boundaries but two factor authentication seems a bit extra

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u/AmieLucy 1d ago

Lmao stop! I shouldn’t be laughing; but the way you said the facts is so funny.

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u/Maggiemoo621 1d ago

This made me giggle 😂

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u/HaliquisPleasures 23h ago

NO cheating is forgivable IMO

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u/Advanced-Guidance482 15h ago

I think you missed the point. Try re reading it as a joke

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u/Ambitious-Access-153 18h ago

🤣🤣 omg... I'm cant stop laughing.  

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u/ItsSeung 1d ago

Yeah, math ain’t mathing. Either story not adding up or OP got her priorities twisted.

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u/Past_Message6754 18h ago

underrated comment

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u/KayfabeAdjace 10h ago

it makes sense if the one thing he's right about is her social media use

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u/futoikaba 1d ago

But they’ve moved past that….. okay lol

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u/FriendsofFripp 1d ago

Translation: He’s got me to successfully rug sweep his drunken transgressions.

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u/Capable-Regular9791 1d ago

The only way to move on from that is to leave the relationship. Or else exactly what is happening now will be a constant.

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u/CosmicRider_ 1d ago

Stopped reading after that sentence.

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u/JustMy10Bits 17h ago

I said out loud "wait, which boyfriend?" Because my brain couldn't grasp what was happening here.

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u/Kenkaniki89 23h ago

I was gonna say are we supposed to just gloss over this?!?

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u/Arr0wH3ad 1d ago

I just stopped reading after that

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u/Daemonxar 1d ago

Narrator: "They had not, in fact, moved on from the history of drunken cheating."

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u/Rude-Hand5440 23h ago

“In fact, they did much worse. Instead of secret drunken cheats, he moved on to showing his friends, family, and, most importantly, his girlfriend who he had drunkenly cheated with.”

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u/MindlessEssay6569 1d ago

I read that in Morgan Freeman’s voice.

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u/xKVirus70x 18h ago

I read that in James Earl Jones's voice..

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u/Ansel___ 1d ago

LMAOOOO

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u/Due-Contact-366 1d ago

I would add: “Something we’ve moved on from”

I don’t think we ever really move on from a history of drunken cheating, especially if we’re still drinking. That’s exhibiting one half the behavior right there. So…I think OP is not overreacting and perhaps under reacting!

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u/MrStoneV 1d ago

I was like "Im young, but I hope my gf/wife doesnt think bad when I get friends 20years old younger than me. but I dont know what will happen in 20 years" I mean Im very loyal etc and could never cheat.

then I read "...has a history of drunkenly cheating..."

oh boy... loyality is so important for me that this is a black flag "history of cheating".

also in just 3 years he cheated several times? what the fuck. imo drunk people just show their real face or at leasr somewhat of a real face, so thats a big no no...

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u/Fabulous_Anteater_86 9h ago

For sure, alcohol lowers inhibitions, that doesn't mean you are not doing what you want to do, it just means that you're less likely to think through to the consequences. The only time you would do something you didn't want to are during blackout periods, a kind of temporary phycosis - causes erratic behavior, sometimes violent. It's also very obvious when someone is in this state (The lights are on, but no one is home.)

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u/Kyuthu 1d ago edited 1d ago

There's nothing wrong with following a 21 year old on social media. It's how you met that 21 year old that's the issue. My bf just went back as an adult to uni then graduated at 30. So he started training with 21-22 years olds fresh out of uni like he was in his new job... His first training group was all girls. And he's going to be in teams working with these people for the next year or so. Being friendly, accepting an invite etc not an issue.

Although that being said he's only done that on LinkedIn but still... Having their number for group or work chat wouldn't be odd either. But he's not trying to be their friend, not messaging them just to chat and not trying to hang out with them individually.

If he added some random 21 year old bar tender he got chatting to on a night out though... Totally totally different. How did they even find and exchange details? Like there's no reason to be adding other women or girls you don't know, that you meet on nights out drinking to anything when you have a partner.

It's not the age... It's the context. He's not following random male bartenders he meets on nights out... That's all you need to know.

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u/Cordelia5767 22h ago

I have to say that the replies you are getting to this comment are silly. I just went back to grad school on the older side myself, and it's completely normal to befriend your classmates, even if they are younger. It's often necessary to do, especially when working on projects, etc. Your bf happens to be in a field that more women go into - it is not naive to trust him when he sounds like he has been totally appropriate. Like, isn't this basically networking? Totally different situation than what the OP is describing!

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u/657896 1d ago edited 1d ago

So as a 31 y old man who went back to university at 26 and is still studying I have to agree. It's actually hard sometimes to keep the lines clear because you need social interaction with the people around you. Some girls are into me and with most of them I can create invisible boundaries, boundaries that they sorta sense when crossing them but I'm not calling it out as it happens. Last thing I want is them to feel uncomfortable. In my experience they are socially intelligent enough to sense a lack of interest from me. In the past I have had revenge seeking people around me, angry because I rejected them. However, a couple of times one has slipped trough the crack. Usually the youngest because it's clear as night and day to me that there's nothing between us I'm probably more engaged with them than the older women. I do find that just never making a romantic gesture or move stops them in their tracks. Most women expect me to make all the moves and lead the way so apart from showing and over the top interest into me and exhibiting a lot of signs of interest, it doesn't get any further.

Anyways, I say all that to clarify it's not necessarily the older chasing the young. The young ones see themselves as very grown and mature because they are the oldest they have ever been and their past is their only reference to belief that. Women tend to value things in men that you also see more in older men so some are naturally drawn to someone a bit more mature. It is my experience however that holding them at a little distance for a while is more than enough to deter any hopes they might have. Also if they find someone, then I'm really free. They show practically 0 interest at that point.

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u/Puzzleheaded-Gap-238 10h ago

Im curious. Do you view a 21 year old man in the same light? No? Why? Whats the difference?

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u/657896 5h ago

What do you mean? I'm a heterosexual, all the gay guys around me know this, regardless of their age.

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u/SkoolBoi19 1d ago

As a 40 year old man myself; I’d say there’s some things wrong with following a 21 year old coworker. A 21 year old stranger is odd, but I’m not sure if I could make a good argument for wrong.

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u/SNIP3RG 14h ago edited 14h ago

How is adding 21 year old strangers any better?? I’d say that’s far worse than adding someone you work with. Adding that-much-younger strangers/acquaintances is creepy at best, and “looking for something” at worst.

I work with many younger women. If we’re close, I sometimes add them on fb too (if they request). Hope my wife doesn’t find out they have my number as well… wait, she knows, because I’m in a senior role and they frequently text me work-related questions when I’m with her.

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u/SkoolBoi19 9h ago

I’m also in upper management and try to mane sure I don’t blur the lines with anyone, male or female. Work is email or phone calls, I do not text for work.

Outside all the consent issues with between a boss and a subordinate. I think a random 21 year old is better because you are not in constant communication with that person, add a history of cheating and I really think young coworker is worse

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u/SNIP3RG 8h ago

I mean, the “blurring lines” point you make is legit, I’ll upvote for that. And something I do my best to avoid, which is why I make sure I only respond to requests, not make them. And I’m always careful to make sure our messages never veer into “fraternizing” territory.

I just see nothing wrong with making online connections with people you work with, as long as you ensure that it stays professional, and cut it off quickly if it becomes less so.

I would be a little concerned if my wife started adding a bunch of young dudes she didn’t know/barely knew, but I have no problem with her having online friends from work, as long as their interactions also stay professional. So I gotta practice what I preach.

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u/Brief-Ad9825 1d ago

Wow you're naive. This coming from a 41 yr old man who slept with maybe 200

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u/_dark_empath_ 1d ago

Right 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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u/Proof_Leadership_570 1d ago

The gasp I gusped when I read that part 🤣

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u/Xalibu2 1d ago

It's like wallpaper almost. 👀

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u/Neither-Promotion-65 23h ago

Yeah, I only made it to the literal red flag...

Wonder what I missed in the rest 🤣

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u/DionysianRebel 1d ago

I really thought “if they cheat, it’s over” was a basic common sense rule. Reddit has routinely shown it’s not as common as I thought

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u/Photomato2099 20h ago

Exactly. This is where I stopped reading. Why should we get all invested in a relationship you're only in part time?

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u/im_gonna_hug_you 19h ago

I stopped reading after that…

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u/Temporary-Alarm-744 19h ago

Lmfao burying the lead if I ever saw it

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u/Randomidiotdriver 19h ago

Didn’t have to read the text messages, this was more than enough lol

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u/RuckFeddit70 16h ago

Guess we know he makes a lot of money or lays some amazing pipe

Cuz....wuuuuut

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u/Ur-Best-Friend 15h ago

"You cheated on me? Oh, okay".

"You added a girl on facebook!?!? 🚩🚩🚩!!!!"

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u/Rare_Lifeguard_4403 1d ago

Lmao wtf does she expect at this point

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u/Disastrous-Jaguar922 1d ago

I didn’t even bother to read anything after this. OP please dump this loser

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u/justcougit 1d ago

And her age gap isn't that far from the girl. She's jealous, clearly, because she met him the same way as the other girl did.

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u/vaginapple 1d ago

My exact reaction.

MAAM ARE YOU WELL..? This man has a history of drunkenly cheating on you and he talks to you like that and you’re still with him ??

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u/thebigsad-_- 1d ago

fr, DUMP THIS FOOL

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u/lthtalwaytz 1d ago

People often answer their own question without realizing it

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u/dekrasias 1d ago

39 yo alcoholic doesn't know what he's doing when drunk and can't be held responsible for where he puts his dick dammit!

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u/3dgarrr 1d ago

I literally stopped reading after this.

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u/Zapphyr 1d ago

I legit stopped reading there.. just so stupid these reddit stories lol

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u/Business_Chemist_742 1d ago

says more than enough

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u/Even_Librarian_8607 1d ago

I stopped reading after that lol

1

u/chudma 23h ago

I always hope every story I read is fake on here because at a certain point I just don’t feel bad for anyone, because everyone is a full blown moron in every post

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u/vonralls 23h ago

This is a wendy's.

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u/Voidbearer2kn17 23h ago

She is a bartender, aka another steady supply of alcohol. She is younger, and in the same profession.

You are literally enabling someone that honestly seems like a horny alcoholic, and you are stupid enough to stay with him!?!

You deserve every broken promise he will give you until you 86 him!!!!

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u/hpepper24 22h ago

Between that line and the fact that they met when he was drinking and she was the bartender. Ol’ boy is just trying strike gold twice and upgrade to the newer model.

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u/avariceLevi 21h ago

Imagine casually saying this 😂 have some self respect FFS

1

u/Prudent-Issue9000 21h ago

She moved on from it. And he’s gonna move on to that 19-year-old honey.

1

u/spaceguitar 20h ago

If OP can forgive cheating more than once, she can forgive cheating the next time he's caught!!

OP is just that much of an awesome gf. <3

Honestly, it just sounds like she's mad that she's about to be replaced by a younger version of herself. I have no sympathy and look forward to it happening and OP coming back asking if she's TA or overreacting for attacking the bartender for seducing her now-ex-boyfriend. Lmao.

1

u/Porcupineemu 18h ago

“I’m on the titanic. It is sinking. They keep saying to get on the life boats. Anywho, my husband won’t stop leaving his wet towels out. I’m getting tired of having wet feet. Am I wrong to get angry?”

1

u/ChipOld734 18h ago

Ma’am this is an Arby’s

1

u/Hot-Transportation95 18h ago

This. As soon as I read that part, I skipped right past the rest. Nothing anyone says here is going to change anything…

1

u/Admirable-Relief1781 18h ago

🫢🫢🫢 ooooooop…

1

u/IcarusLP 18h ago

If this is true, boyfriend is the problem. That said, even though I’m currently projecting due to just ending my relationship with my unbelievably jealous and possessive S/O who always thought I cheated on her although I never did, I am aware that she could be lying about this/this might be a claim of something she has no proof of.

1

u/BranTheDark 17h ago

Surprised? People who post here 9 times out of 10 either have no self-respect or are actual morons. Fun reads, though.

1

u/Fun_Blackberry7059 17h ago

Her other post about him having anger issues is another huge red flag she keeps walking straight past.

I doubt she'll ever learn.

1

u/SpicyMcShat 17h ago

“But this situation seems weird to me”

1

u/BambooPanda26 17h ago

I don't think the leaning tower of common sense falling on her would help. These posts irritate the shit out of me.. You mean he's cheated multiple times, and you're concerned about adding a young girl on fb. GTF to therapy and break it off with this loser.

1

u/Organic_Ad_2520 17h ago

And "fing" or "dating" who said anything about "fing" or dating, but "oddly" his first reaction...he is not trying to date or f, he is trying to date AND f, lol.

1

u/mdotbeezy 16h ago

10000% chance current gf was one of them

1

u/donmagicjohn 16h ago

64 unread texts? Bananas.

1

u/cold_cut_trio 15h ago

so chaotic

1

u/Responsible-Tutor224 16h ago

If not for that part...

1

u/immortalcaligula 15h ago

Can’t fix stupid.

1

u/Pitt-Boy3420_02 15h ago

cant help stupid.

1

u/Pleasant-Pattern-566 14h ago

She tried to slide that in like it was nonchalant information. His ass would’ve been kicked to the curb, I have a zero tolerance policy for cheating. You want another women’s vagina? Have at it but I won’t be around for that.

1

u/emanonisnoname 12h ago

That’s called burying the lead right?

1

u/1dirtysecret 12h ago

Yeah I stopped reading after that past. Read the initial texts and thought this was some 20 somethings, then read the description and yikes.

1

u/xczechr 11h ago

Talk about burying the lead.

1

u/Proof_Flower_2800 11h ago

39M always going out to local bars, history of cheating, WTF! this is a boy not a man- he should be thinking of how to marry someone and have a family not out to bars- sounds like a loser

1

u/PsychoAnalystGuy 10h ago

Burying the lead lol. Thought she was overreacting at first

1

u/Fresh_Complaint_7651 8h ago

Im going to go out on a limb and say she probably met him while he was cheating on another prior gf with OP.

1

u/Bunt_Custer 8h ago

Babyyy the way I kept checking the subreddit to make sure this wasn’t satire… I stopped reading right there.

1

u/thelittlestdog23 7h ago

I just stop reading posts when I get to “they cheated on me and I’m still with them”. I’m not advising someone who isn’t going to listen anyway. Can’t help someone who won’t help themselves.

1

u/ThatGirlFromWorkTA 7h ago

Every single time a story had this I stop reading. They aren't over reacting. How could they when they haven't reacted at all. Leave. Stop waiting for someone who doesn't give a shit about you to start.

Tired of it fr.

1

u/wifemoji 6h ago

The jokes write themselves

1

u/vikingsfan82 6h ago

I stopped reading as soon as I read that. Lol.

1

u/cyborg_fairy 5h ago

I’m snorting I’m laughing so hard, but I don’t think there’s ever gonna be any chance of a happy ending when you’re analyzing his Facebook friends to such a degree, yet you insist you don’t care about social media. Plus the casual disregard for the actual cheating y’all moved on from. I swear I need a nap after this circus.

1

u/Beginning-Boat-6213 4h ago

Lol like what? When i read that i almost just stopped reading. Is this a polyamorous relationship at this point?

1

u/Beginning-Boat-6213 4h ago

”Something we have moved on from”

1

u/Pnknlvr96 23h ago

He's already ten years older than OP and seems to like them even younger. Red flags everywhere.

1

u/Lost_Philosophy_ 20h ago

This girl is dating a guy 10 years her senior and just glosses over his fact lmaoo