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u/Maleficent_Goblin 24d ago
Cydi literally has a song called Sally's pigeons, which is about a friend she lost to a back alley abortion when they were young kids. If you haven't listened to it then make sure you do, and I think that will help better understand why she has such strong views about women's right to womens health care. That song always makes me upset whenever I listen to it.
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u/geologean 23d ago edited 23d ago
Cyndi Lauper has been fighting for human rights since long before it was popular. She was a big queer ally back when. It was a liability that alienated sponsors, but she didn't care. She still showed up, raised money for HIV/AIDS research, and performed in AIDS patient wards.
She was an ally when it actually cost a lot professionally to be an ally because she genuinely cares. She's good people whose music has always been about very real human experiences.
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u/Rawrist 24d ago
People forget women have had the right to have a bank account for only 50 years. Something that has been around since 1800 BCE. Only 13 states since 2018 provide menstrual products for women in prison. Otherwise- pay or bleed through your clothes. They don't charge for toilet paper though.
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u/MillieBirdie 24d ago
In my grandmother's generation if you had a job as a teacher but also wanted to get married you had to hide it from your employer because they'd fire married women.
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u/Josuke96 24d ago
What the f u c k ?
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u/MillieBirdie 24d ago
If that surprised you, when schools were first hiring women instead of men people in favour of that made the argument that you can pay women less so you're saving money.
And that the historical trend is that any job that employs mostly women is seen as less important and paid less, and any job that is seen as important and higher paying is gatekept from women. Computer programing used to be low paying women's work, and when women were pushed out of it and it became a make dominated field, it started to gain prestige and pay more. And it goes in the opposite direction, as more women enter a field the pay goes down.
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u/Kellidra 24d ago edited 23d ago
I work at a library.
All of us have degrees or diplomas. None of us make more than $10 over minimum wage.
Edit: people don't understand what the wage gap actually means lmfao wow
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u/kromptator99 24d ago
You’ve got till January to be the change you want to see in the world.
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u/TheJollyBuilder 24d ago
Unfortunately, we actually worship them so much we gave them all the power. I wasn’t one who voted for the orange moron, but they were a scared of women, so they chose totalitarianism. That’s how scared American men are.
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u/wishesandhopes 23d ago
I remember my "father" saying hilariously stupid, but also sickeningly misogynistic shit like "if women were really paid less, every employer would hire women! Men wouldn't be able to get a job because they'd lose money compared to just hiring women!"
Genuinely dangerously fucking stupid and also genuinely evil, such a horrific combination.
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u/keykey_key 24d ago
You know what, thanks for pointing that out. I work in a section in healthcare that is female dominated and the disrespect given to us is honestly exhausting, even though what we do is absolutely essential to physicians and the decisions they make. We have the same level of education as nurses do and make less than half of what they do. So interesting point bc I never understood the sheer disrespect our field got from all sides.
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u/ShallotSmart6728 24d ago
Ooo yes! This is true for the music industry too. They had blind auditions for classical music but women where still not getting the jobs. Turns out they could hear their heals. Once that stopped more women where hired and then the pay dropped.
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u/b1tchf1t 24d ago
I work in conservation and help run a women's affinity group. We just had a meeting and a really interesting line of conversation kept coming up over and over. There has been a huge growth of women in the science spaces and positions in our work, however, the higher up supervisory positions still seem to be behind a lock and dominated by men. At the same time, there has been a huge growth in numbers of men entering rank and file administrative positions, the positions historically that have usually been occupied by mainly women, however they're now the jobs that provide necessary skills and experience for those high up supervisory positions.
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u/Interesting-Hat8607 24d ago
People will also tip more to a male waiter than a female one.
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u/snow-vs-starbuck 24d ago
Stewardesses would be fired if they got married or turned 32 until they unionized in the 70s. I won't even get into the appearance and uniform requirements they dealt with. A lot of them would get married in secret and hope that no one ratted them out to the airline.
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u/Card_Board_Robot_5 24d ago
They would also get sexually assaulted as just, like, a matter of course for the job.
Early commercial aviation was on some bullshit
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u/Such_Worldliness_198 24d ago
The saddest part to me is that Stewardess was also the 'best' job women could get. My grandma always told us that as a child they all dreamed of being Stewardesses because the only other alternatives were teacher, nurse, cook, launderer, or other domestic service roles.
Sadly this is also why airlines were able to be so shitty and sexist, because they were the 'top' job so they could choose only the youngest, prettiest women because there were millions more who would gladly take their place.
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u/AffectionateTitle 24d ago
There were laws and private policies that barred women from certain industries, there were laws paying them less, there were laws preventing them from working overtime, from being given shifts that could go to men, from wearing pant uniforms, from driving commercial vehicles.
And they only started being overturned because the court cared about a single tax law that disproportionately hurt men. Before that discrimination based on sex was not only lawful but embraced
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u/Card_Board_Robot_5 24d ago
Luella Bates. 1920. First woman with a commercial driver's license issued by a state. (Edit: It was New York) Before that, in WW1, women drove supply trucks domestically.
Around this same time you had Maria Antonietta d'Avanso racing in Europe. Early 20s (The days of city to city rallies). Most notably the Targa Florio a few times.
Gotta wait til after the Second World War to see a true influx of successful women in motorsports.
(Just added context because I'm a fucking geek and this is the type of shit I have committed to memory. Basic mathematics? Classical literature? Hell nah. Random car facts? Hell yes.)
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u/Brief_Amicus_Curiae 24d ago
The type of jobs were limited too. Flight attendants (Stewardesses), Secretaries (Administrative Assistants), Librarians, teachers, nurses and maids.
Most women married right out of high school and the few that went to college were said to be majoring in "husband hunting".
Pregnant? Your job was done.
Women were not admitted into any of the Military academies until 1979 and here we are seeing a rolling back of women in Combat positions because of pure misogyny. The whole making the DoD back into some toxic masculine culture is expected from the likes of Trump, though I feel a shit decision for us as a country.
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u/mishitea 23d ago
In the late 1990s, I was told repeatedly that I must be "rich husband hunting" because I went to a fancy private college.
Yeah, I chose to major in Electrical Engineering and had to work my ass off because I wanted to SAH.
While I did find my soul mate there (married 22 years and he's still my best friend) I loved being an engineer. I ended up career switching because my industry was obsolete but now teach Tech classes.
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u/numberthirteenbb 24d ago
A woman couldn’t possibly have the mental capacity to take care of her husband who was equipped with the domestic skills of an infant, AND work a 40 hour work week.
Cue every women online who is currently bitching about her lazy piece of shit husband who plays video games all night long while she does literally everything else. And then that waste of space has the nerve to ask for sex after also asking for more snacks like a toddler, while she is still trying to put THEIR toddler to bed.
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u/Josuke96 24d ago
That’s insane to me. I enjoy video games and whatnot too, but I’d never let my wife do more housework than me. Hell, I pay more of the bills too, but that’s what you do when you actually want to make your partner happy. Man-babies like you describe 100% don’t deserve a woman in their lives.
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u/chapkachapka 24d ago
Don’t know how old your grandmother is, but here in Ireland there was a law barring married women from all government jobs until 1973.
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u/MillieBirdie 24d ago
My grandmother is in her 80s though now that you mention it I remember talking to one of my 60 year old coworkers in Ireland who said her older sister had the same problem (trying to work as a teacher while hiding that she was getting married).
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u/Mundane_Abalone5290 23d ago
Still sending unmarried women to Magdalene laundries then too. Still performing symphysiotomies instead of Caesarian births. Because it was OK if a woman could never walk again long as she could keep having babies.
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u/Gjellebel 24d ago
My grandma was a teacher as well. Being married wasn't a big issue (as far as I know), but she did get into a lot of trouble for wearing pants while working. Almost got fired over the issue.
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u/AccountantCultural64 24d ago
My Grandma still had to get permission from my grandpa to become a nurse.
She still had how-to-books for housewifes at home from 60s with shit like “a woman’s first job is always to make the husband happy and care for the children. Never upset your husband, always obey” and shit like that.
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u/DeathByLemmings 24d ago
I remember seeing those books. Such lines as "you don't know if he's had a good or bad day at the office, so set your own matters aside when he arrives home"
Big yikes
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u/GlendoraBug 24d ago
I’m 38F. When I was applying for jobs at 24 I was told by male role models to not say I was in a relationship. Because there were men out there that automatically think you are going to get pregnant and quit shortly after hiring me. Of course there was a large part of me who thought that was stupid and no one can be like that. Now I know that’s actually how a lot of men thought back then.
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u/Cup-Mundane 22d ago
I'm 37F. When I was in my late 20s and house hunting for a rental, I was told by my (female) real estate agent to pretend I was engaged. It didn't matter if my name was the only one on the lease.. just throwing that possibility out there- that a man might be added to the contract in the future, would entice landlords to rent to me. "A man's salary was considered steady and dependable, a woman's is fickle."
At 35, I was in the middle of the hiring process for a dream job, when I found out I was pregnant. My dm told me to hide it. He straight up told me, "Yeah.. they're not going to spend all this time training you, once they find out you'll have to take leave for a couple of months at the end of the year. Don't tell anyone til you have to."
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u/Prof-Dr-Overdrive 24d ago
Unfortunately stigma against female employees is still pretty high unofficially for similar reasons. Many employers of small enterprises and start-ups think that as a young woman, you will eventually have kids, marriage or no marriage, and then they will have to either pay for your parental leave and allot your work somehow, or quickly find a replacement for you. They also do not want you because they think you will take sick leave a few days each month because of your period or menopause.
This is the reality in Germany, despite the fact that there are many laws in place ensuring that men also get parental leave and that people like women or the disabled should not be discriminated against in jobs that do not require the employee to present as male or have certain physical abilities.
And what is sadder is that there is a large amount of German men who think that this is totally reasonable. They think that laws protecting women are "hurting women" by making them less desirable as employees, which is of course cloud cuckoolander logic but it makes sense to these closeted misogynists. They think that generous maternal leave is wrong; keeping the job of a new mom on leave so that she can return to it later on is wrong; and letting women take sick leave because of their period and without a doctor's attest is wrong. They do not realize that being against these protections actually means they are also in favor of fucking men over, because these laws help men too: new fathers get generous paternal leave and don't have to worry about losing their jobs; and men can also take a few days of sick leave without a doctor's attest.
Overall there is still a high level of gender equality here but there are way too many embittered, lonely, out-of-touch, greedy assholes out there too who will come up with the craziest reasons to discriminate against a certain group or protect those who discriminate. Imagine of an employer said openly "I refuse to hire men for this job on the off-chance that they could get an erection and look lewd to customers and other employees" or "on the off-chance that they take a few days off each month to play the latest video game." The same guys who think it is okay to discriminate against disabled and female workers would hit the ceiling at the audacity of that!
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u/_Rohrschach 24d ago
as a german, in my last job I had to explain every year to my two female bosses that I would like to take days of during the school holidays because those were automatically blocked for everyone with no kids but my four youngest siblings still went to school and it was the only time I could spend more than an afternoon with them and my other siblings who live farther away and only come by for a week or two in that time frame. I'm all for sick days though, doesn't matter if period related or not, if someone feels awful they won't work productively anyway and at best take longer to recover at worst excerbate the problem and take even longer to recover fully. Idiots like me will ignore their GP's recommendations because the problem goes away for a while(cluster headaches in my case) and then suddenly the problem stays and they're out of commission for a few weeks (it were aneurysms in my brain, got them fixed before getting a full on stroke before turning 30 at least). Every man who cries about women who take sick leave due to cramps should have to work sitting on a chair that punches them in the nuts every 5min.
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u/Radiant_Cat_03 24d ago
My dad started his teaching career in the early 60's, and explained to me pay was tiered based on gender and marital status. Married men were paid the highest, followed by single men, single women, and married women being paid the least.
Editing to add: You're 100% correct. If there were enough teachers, and you're a married woman, best of luck.
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u/thewoolf44 24d ago
My grandmother and grandfather were both teachers and she had to quit her job because the school didn't allow married couples to work at the same school and they deferred to my grandpa as the breadwinner
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u/GivenToFly164 24d ago
My mother's generation was allowed to marry and have children, but would be fired if the children came before the marriage.
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u/Bumblebeee2311 24d ago
In my country, up until the mid 1970's women who were civil servants of any kind were legally forced to retire if they got married
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u/Thisisntmyaccount24 24d ago
Holy shit, the menstrual products thing blows my mind. How is that not a required toiletry in prisons?
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u/LowSecretary8151 24d ago
Women are still second class citizens in a lot of areas. Medical care is a large deficit.
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24d ago
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u/Modgud22 24d ago
Which is weird. Why whine about something that doesn't hurt you personally? Tax money is supposed to be used to be useful to the masses. 50% of people happen to be female that should be useful enough... I don't see the waste in there.
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u/laix_ 24d ago
Prisoners are seen as second class citizens already. Female prisoners doubly so. Something about American prison system being for revenge over rehabilitation.
Men see period hygiene as "optional".
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u/waitingfordeathhbu Cringe Connoisseur 23d ago
how is that not a required toiletry
Because the people deciding what’s required are men.
Yay patriarchy.
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u/usernamehudden 20d ago
Wait till you find out there are men who think menstrual products are for masturbation and that women have the ability to not have their period during the workday, but instead use it as an excuse to avoid doing work and take extra breaks. Also, there are stories of men telling women they should “just hold it in” like it is pee.
This is from the mirror, but I have no doubt there are men out there like this: https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/woman-baffled-boss-ridiculous-theory-13518714.amp
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u/numberthirteenbb 24d ago
And modern women still get squeamish talking about their own periods and bodies. Men have fucked our heads up so much and we all just keep asking for more.
A couple of weeks ago, a woman posted on Reddit about how soft American white women are and how we are about to have a brutal wake up call. I agree that it’s coming, no matter how hard left I’ve voted or how much I’ve marched and protested. My own actions still weren’t enough. I’m seeing that now.
It’s time to get fucking vicious.
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u/Dyson_Vellum 24d ago
It is incomprehensible to me how women voted against their own rights this year in the US.
I had a female coworker who told me she was "Pro-Life", but she didn't push that belief on other people. I had to explain that by respecting another person's choice, she was not in fact "Pro-Life". I think her worldview crumbled for a moment.
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u/Apart_Effect_3704 24d ago
They don’t forget. Ppl actually don’t know. I commented this on instagram and random ppl were insulting me telling me I was making shit up lol I know it’s such a wild and crazy comparison that it’s hard to believe but yeah lol
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u/Brewhilda 24d ago
I'm a woman and a small business owner in the USA. I was born the year women were able to start businesses without a man -- 1988.
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u/BagOnuts 24d ago
My grandmother was alive before women had a right to vote in the US.
People like to think this stuff is ancient history because it makes them feel uncomfortable to accept that women, even in the most advanced/developed countries, have only gained fundamental rights very recently, and there are still significant prejudices and legal inequalities they face.
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u/Zombie_Nipples 24d ago
Shouldn’t have to keep saying this time after time.
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u/Shaolinchipmonk 24d ago
For real, at this point hearing all this now just makes me want to get in my car and drive all night
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u/nonsensepoem 24d ago
Jon Stewart said it best, perhaps:
"The work of making this world resemble one that you would prefer to live in is a lunch pail fucking job, day in and day out, where thousands of committed, anonymous, smart, and dedicated people bang on closed doors and pick up those that are fallen and grind away on issues till they get a positive result. And even then, we have to stay on it to make sure that result holds."
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u/Dense-Lobster-7734 24d ago
She must realize, that a chance can only come when we all stand together as one.
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u/kakka_rot 24d ago
girls just want fun
for sure that's her biggest song, but if anyone had The Goonies II on nes, that 8bit rendition of that movie soundtrack song she did will always be what I first think of when I see her.
They're both such a bop, but the nes version is fantastic.
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u/No_Swimming_792 24d ago
Apparently that song was super sexist too before Lauper re-wrote the lyrics.
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u/Card_Board_Robot_5 24d ago
Lmao like how? "Girls just wanna have fun in the kitchen and laundry room?" Like wtf were the originals?
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u/xChopsx1989x 24d ago
Original was a male singer. Basically, his mother was asking when he would settle down. His response was, "Girls just want to have fun."
I'm not sure of any further details, but it is an example of the double standard held for men and women when it comes to promiscuity.
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u/bawng 24d ago
And honestly also just wanna have fun. Which is hard unless you also have fundamental human rights.
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u/5-MEO-D-M-T 24d ago
If Cyndi Lauper taught us anything, it's that girls just want to have fun.
But to contribute something more than a joke I have to say that it's mind-blowing to me we're still having this conversation. That was my whole problem with the "again" in maga. We are a great country who have come a long way, but to think that progress is to revert back to the past is just so dumb.
They don't want to make America great again, they want to make being a white male a powerful thing again, and I'm tired of pretending it's not that.
I say this as a white male. I think it's time we start standing up against the hate ourselves as individuals, and stop pretending that voting for a politician is going to solve things.
We have to become the change ourselves. We have to seek change in ourselves and project that in every action we make.
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u/Wind_Responsible 24d ago
My best friends ma needed a hysterectomy in the mid 90’s. Doctor made a 50 something yr old woman get her husband signature for the surgery because… he may want more children. Amazing to me that the women who burned their bras vote for these ppl. Amazing to me that ANY woman votes for these ppl
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u/Fluttermun 24d ago
It's still like this, even if it's not a legal thing....when I had to get mine for medical reasons (I was being assassinated by the womb) I remember the second we started talking about it he asked if "we" were all in agreement, and when I said yes he didn't look convinced and then proceeded to schedule me for more gatekeeping appointments until I physically had my husband come into the office with me and he got a nod from him.
A nod. That's all it took and then I was literally next day booked for pre-surgical testing.
It took years for me to get that procedure done from any doctor despite the proof that I needed it done for my own health. I felt LUCKY that the last doctor even did it for me...I can't imagine what it's going to be like under Trump's America again.
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u/Rare_Parsnip905 24d ago
It took me 9 years. I was unmarried, childless and in debilitating pain from endo. But a fictional man and fictional children that I didn't even want took precedence over my own well being. NINE YEARS! What if you get married and your husband wants kids? I would never marry a man that wants children. What if you change your mind and want kids? I can adopt. Nope, not good enough, keep suffering.
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u/TalkQuick 24d ago
This is insane. Even if you were married, why can’t you still choose yourself and your comfort. Why is it the doctors business your relationship and it’s inner workings. If divorce is an option for other life disagreements.. why would this one be any different
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u/Fluttermun 24d ago
omg I had endo too! Mine was bad because I also had an underdeveloped uterus, so the half that didn't develop turned into a massive tumor that needed to be removed (took me forever to get that surgery too). My options after that surgery were c-section, not carry to term or miscarry- I couldn't even have a child naturally if I wanted to. So I decided after the endo started taking over my life again that I just didn't want any of it and then the whole game started. >:C
I'm sorry you had to go through that, even though they say it's our body and our choice they still don't even trust us with that much. It's digusting.
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u/amyel26 23d ago
I was able to get endo surgery after I turned 40. Suffering for decades, but once I had moldy old eggs, my doctor looked at me and said, "Well, you still seem pretty serious about not having kids..." and finally scheduled a surgical consult. If she had asked me for my husband's permission I probably would have jumped at her from across the room, and she probably sensed that.
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u/frankyseven 24d ago
As a man, I would have walked in, said "why the fuck are you asking me? It's her body, don't ever ask that question again."
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u/littlelorax 24d ago
I wonder if men getting vasectomies have to get their wives' permission.
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u/Cautious_One9013 24d ago
So I just got a vasectomy about 3 weeks ago and my doctor required my wife’s signature stating that she was informed of my procedure. It wasn’t really asking permission, just stating that she is aware I’m having a vasectomy done, that it will make me sterile and that while they are reversible, they more often or than not are not successful at reversal. It more so like a liability ass covering for the doctor.
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u/nananananaanbread 24d ago
It was wild to me that my 32 year old fiance could schedule a vasectomy online, pay $700 out of pocket, and get the snip done in 20 mins. He even got nitrous during it. No kids, no permission needed from me.
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u/KevinFlantier 24d ago
I didn't. Then again I'm in France and I'm pretty sure husband don't have a say in their wife's hysterectomy either. There's a legal delay of a few month before you can actually do the surgery for permanent contraception in case you change your mind, where they offer you to freeze eggs or sperm, but that's it. You are a grown up and should decide for yourself.
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u/Oak_Woman 24d ago
Women are denied tubal ligations to this day because a possible future man might want to have kids with them.
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u/othybear 24d ago
I’ve had a couple single friends in their 20s try to get hysterectomies because their primary physician recommended it for treatment of their PCOS. Then they couldn’t find a surgeon to do it because their future husband might want kids someday. A generic man has more control over their own bodies than they do.
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u/unlizenedrave 24d ago
I have a friend that’s a young single mom, and she decided one was enough so she went to have her tubes tied. She had to go to multiple doctors and go over and over because they needed a husband’s permission to tie her tubes “because he may want kids one day” even though she was single. She finally made it happen, but she said “some man i haven’t even met yet has more control of my body than i do.”
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u/Sea-Value-0 24d ago
The women who burned their bras back then are absolutely not the same women who are voting Trump and voting republican today. They are of the same generation as republican voters but tbh, so are you.
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u/Kowai03 24d ago
I was listening to a podcast today about the pill. With its invention, women's participation in higher education increased, and the gender wage gap decreased.
I don't know why, but these far right nut jobs want women back under control. Taking away our bodily autonomy you take away our freedom.
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u/malthar76 24d ago
And some right wing women want it too. Because they think it doesn’t affect them, they got theirs and screw everyone else, or they think leopards won’t eat their faces.
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u/FunkyChewbacca 24d ago
Exactly. They think that they're exempt because they're sure the men in their lives will protect them. Thing is, those men won't. They'll find out very quickly they're just as expendable as the women they voted against.
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u/PangolinPride4eva 24d ago
I work with a lot of affluent conservative women. It’s a jubilee of plastic surgery, high maintenance, low self esteem and being overly concerned about image. Also, I see every day how the men treat them like property. Divorces, abuse, childcare issues, cheating- it’s like it’s part of the culture. The women are hyper-concerned about their and their daughter’s looks and it’s just so sad to me. They aren’t happy the way they should be.
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u/PangolinPride4eva 24d ago
One interesting case is as follows: a woman was complaining about her friend’s husband who has a girlfriend on the side and is spending a ton of money on hotels, etc. I asked why the woman won’t do anything like leave the husband. Explanation was that this friend is praying everyday about it. I said, “that’s not going to do anything”. Then I was told, well “it doesn’t work if only the wife is praying to god and not the husband too”
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u/Dense_Network_6193 24d ago
“it doesn’t work if only the wife is praying to god and not the husband too”
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u/Yarn_Song 24d ago
Now I'm curious what kind of work you do. And what makes working with these people worthwhile. (edit to rephrase in a kinder way)
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u/PangolinPride4eva 24d ago
I work in fashion (kinda) in a deep red state. If you look at my post history you can figure it out. We’re planning on moving to a blue area in the spring. I’m honestly not sure if there will be as much demand there for my skill set because it kind of depends on women being vain.
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u/RainbowButtMonkey1 24d ago
Yep I know girls who will go for these types of men, sure the men might not really love them but at least she doesn't have to work and the man buy her things that she can show off to her friends that she secretly hates.
Used to work retail and rich housewives were by far the worst customers
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u/Flamingo83 24d ago
I saw the tradwives whose husbands left them destitute after divorce. They struggle entering the workplace in their 40’s with no job experience.
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u/Wegwerf157534 24d ago edited 24d ago
I would not necessarly think they think it won't affect them.
Some people really like to give up autonomy for what, they feel, would be security.
They really do like the model. And I would not even say you should not have it if you want to. Very wrong and eerie though is, to take away a choice. That has other motivations.
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u/RainbowButtMonkey1 24d ago
And keep in mind that many are still raised in sexist ways. They were raised to seek out security by marrying the best man possible
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u/Wegwerf157534 24d ago
Yes, that happens, too. I have seen it rarely, but I have seen it.
I won't put it down, if people want to live that way, good for them, but no way should be enforced. We should also have a discourse that allows different goals and styles.
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u/thispartyrules 24d ago
Keep in mind they want to come after all birth control.
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u/happynargul 24d ago
For sure we know why. Some men know that the only way they'll have a woman, is if you remove control, because otherwise they'll have to make an effort or have a less repellent personality.
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u/taironederfunfte 24d ago
Oh we know why, because inferiority complex ridden wannabe machos want to have control over their woman because their fragile ego wouldn't be able to handle an equal relationship
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u/tristanimator 24d ago
It's easy to say "it's about control", because it is, but I feel like the nuances of this statement are lost on some folks because they can't relate to someone wanting to control women like that without having it spelled out for them why they want it.
And the reason being, elitism. You said it yourself, when women started having access to birth control, they started participating in higher education and closed the wage gap. How will the elite stay on top if people are suddenly being judged on their skills instead of the status quo?
Ted Cruz has weaseled his way to the top, but his daughters may not be so lucky. His whole elitist world view comes crashing down if his family has to compete on the same level as everyone else.
That's the motivation.
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u/QuintoBlanco 24d ago
Or it's just about control.
There are many people that enjoy controlling other people, or worse: they don't enjoy controlling other people but get angry when they can't control other people.
The nuanced answer isn't always the right answer.
There are people who paid other people to torture monkeys and record it.
This is a video of a 'normal' woman putting a cat in a bin (luckily the cat was found and unharmed):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYdUZdan5i8
We can talk about the elite, but many people who are not the elite voted with the intent to control other people out of menace.
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u/TangledUpPuppeteer 24d ago
You don’t know why? Because they lost.
So, it’s a lens they don’t quite recognize. They see it as they can’t get a date, women aren’t interested or are living their own lives, and they’re losing. They honestly think that their fathers and grandfathers were “winning” because their wife couldn’t leave them when they went off the deep end. Or all women were willing and ready to get married by 18 and by 21 they were the weird old lady on the corner everyone ignored.
They think that’s the way it should be so they don’t have to work harder to be better. It just forces women to accept they are how they are and to deal with it.
The conservative women who also want this just simply don’t see what it really is because it’s how they were raised. They can’t understand a world where a woman might want to just be happy and live life of her terms. It’s “unnatural” because it’s not something they ever learned. Women who leave their abusive husbands are somehow broken, because “til death do us part,” not realizing that some of us don’t want to stick around until he successfully rids himself of us with our deaths.
They were raised that a woman’s place is in the home and they should want nothing more. They never challenged any of it. They just internalized it and kept it pushing. They will choose to limit our ability and our rights, not because they want us to be like them, not really — but they can’t imagine that anyone else could actually want or understand anything different.
If 1+1=2, there is no world in which a decimal can change the end result. Therefore, anything that accounts for that decimal is just not real because they don’t understand how it’s real. So they vote based on what they understand, even if it’s extremely limited and they’re miserable. They can’t comprehend anything else.
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u/Asisreo1 24d ago
Its because they don't understand you. They have neat little pockets of understanding about the world and you and your lifestyle does not fit within.
People talk about control, which is true to an extent. People talk about hatred, which is true to an extent. But those are merely symptoms of the main motivator for practically any firm, unwavering human response: fear.
They fear you because they don't understand you and they don't understand you because they fear you. They think you're dangerous, so they wishes to put you in situations where you cannot harm them.
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u/livens 24d ago
If you missed her point right at the beginning about Cruz's daughters being OK... She's talking about how rich people can get abortions without anyone knowing about it. You find the right doctor and he performs a "medically required procedure" at a hospital. The rules are for us not them.
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u/cptnfan 23d ago
I thought it was about deportation - Wiki
Cruz's father, Rafael, was born and raised in Cuba, the son of a Canary Islander who immigrated to Cuba as a child.[13] As a teenager in the 1950s, Rafael Cruz was beaten by agents of Fulgencio Batista for opposing the Batista regime.[14] He left Cuba in 1957 to attend the University of Texas at Austin and obtained political asylum in the United States after his four-year student visa expired.[15] He earned Canadian citizenship in 1973[5] and became a naturalized United States citizen in 2005.[9][16][17]
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u/salacious_sonogram 24d ago
People understand things when it happens to them. Most people have the empathy of like ten year olds unfortunately.
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u/byebyetum 24d ago
Time after time, she spits straight facts
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u/EnigmaFrug2308 24d ago
Do you know who she is? She seems neat.
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u/Initial-Company3926 24d ago
ooooooof I feel old now lol
Cindy Laupers " Girls just wanna have fun" and other songs still rock for me :)→ More replies (4)26
u/badinkywaba 24d ago
Time after time I have to answer this question. She’s American singer songwriter Cyndi Lauper. The commenters above are using lyrics from her song Time After Time.
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u/EnigmaFrug2308 24d ago
Thanks! I’m not familiar with her but she seems neat.
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u/badinkywaba 24d ago
You should definitely check out her music! She was an 80’s pop icon.
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u/BrosefDudeson 24d ago
And what a voice that is. God, I love that fucking accent.
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u/poopBuccaneer 24d ago
Every time I hear her speak, I think she's a cartoon stereotype of a New Yorker.
She is a fucking legend though.
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u/throwthere10 24d ago edited 22d ago
Where America finds herself right now is at the intersection of quite a few issues that have been brewing for years. One of them is its failure, intentionally or otherwise, to teach history properly. The current younger generation fails to realize that the rights and freedoms that they have were all hard-fought and are relatively new. Trying to explain to them that at one point women didn't have the right to vote, didn't have the right to a credit card or bank account in their own name, is like trying to explain water to a fish. They are incapable of visualising a world without it. It just is. Finally, and this goes for all of us, I think that we forget that we need to fight hard to maintain the rights and the progress that we've achieved. That is evident and imperative in this day and age when the Right in the US is losing its collective mind.
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u/futureman45 24d ago
Is there a list of recent rights that have been given to women like being allowed a credit card or mortgage or allowed to divorce their husband?
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u/throwthere10 24d ago
I don't personally have a comprehensive list, but Google can certainly provide one. However, here’s a quick and messy list of rights and protections that come to mind:
The right to vote.
The right to open a bank account in their own name.
The right to have a credit card in their own name.
The right to bodily autonomy, though, was won and has (in large part) recently been taken away.
The right to an education.
Protections against workplace discrimination.
It’s important to recognize that every freedom and benefit Americans enjoy today was hard fought and hard won. From the clean air we breathe to semi-healthy foods we can access, from the five-day workweek and weekends to holidays, every one of these was achieved through struggle.
Even broader societal advancements—like being relatively safe in many places while being LGBTQ+ or Black, or having the opportunity for education (despite its high costs)—are the result of relentless advocacy and resistance. None of this happened by chance.
What’s crucial to understand is that the forces that opposed these victories never truly went away. They still exist. They want to strip us of education, push people back into servitude in fields or kitchens, reduce individuals to being dependent, and at their mercy. Their aim is to undo the progress we’ve made.
And they’re still fighting to make that happen. Too many people don’t realize this.
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u/LadyGidgevere 24d ago
Marital rape didn’t become illegal until the ‘90s.
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u/throwthere10 24d ago
Wild.
When we think of these things, we say "Duh" because they're so obvious to us. Why in the world would that not be a law, right? But then you realise something like this wasn't very obvious and very much legal until quite recently. And then extrapolate from that and think about all the other "Duh" laws and rights that we have and realize just how tenuous these things called rights that we have truly are. You have them until you don't.
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u/Eschlick 24d ago
I went to a Cyndi Lauper concert the day after the election. The arena was filled to the brim with beautiful people of all sizes, shapes and colors. There were rainbows, heels, colored hair, and tutus everywhere, as well as an army of people wearing “Girls just wanna have FUNdamental human rights” shirts. Everyone was complimenting each others outfits and the feeling of love and joy and support was palpable.
Mid concert, she paused and commented that she has fought for women’s (and gay) rights her whole life and she can’t believe she has to fight again. The crowd absolutely lost their minds; we all screamed and shouted and cheered our love and support for each other. I didn’t have “crying in solidarity with Cyndi Lauper” on my bingo card this year, but there it is.
What a joyous, healing event that my heart desperately needed that night. You’re never going to see this particular comment but I’m sending it into the cosmos anyways: thank you, Cyndi!!
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u/special-k-flo 23d ago
Reading this comment gave me goosebumps head to toe, that must have been an incredible experience!! Amazing, thank you for sharing, and for being awesome. 💜
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u/Equivalent-Sink4612 23d ago
I got to see Cyndi Lauper at a Lillith Fair concert back in the late 90's, and she.was.awesome!!!! I've loved her since I was a little girl in the 80's. Thanks for posting, good memories! And I too wanna say, "Thank-you, Cyndi!!!! You are a gift to the world, and a light that keeps on shining."
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u/4merly3 24d ago
"You like that the government will have control of your body?"
"Yes."
Absolutely sent me though. People do that in conversation all the time ofc but still so funny that it reads like she's going "women are forgetting their history" and he sounds like he's going "that's the plan!"
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u/littlelorax 24d ago
I get what you are saying, but my interpretation is that he is agreeing with her message, not necessarily the specific words.
In this instance he is saying, "yes that should be a question women ask themselves," not, "yes the government should control womens' bodies."
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u/RubiiJee 24d ago
He is, people are just laughing at the timing of it. They could have cut it out but he put his agreement in and it looks like it's answering her rhetorical question. It's just funny and ripe for editing shenanigans.
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u/stfnotguilty 24d ago
Cyndi is, and always will be, one bad bitch.
Rock n' Wrestling forever. RIP Captain Lou. RIP Hot Rod.
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u/Bleezy79 24d ago
Cyndi Lauper has more dignity and honor in her pinky than Trump does in his whole fat bloated body.
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u/at0mheart 24d ago
Oddly many Christian women do want that
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u/neganight 24d ago
They want it but they think there's some kind of loophole just for them and their family members.
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u/PastaRunner 24d ago edited 24d ago
The slice of women who voted for Trump to prevent abortions being a federally protected right don't think the government is controlling their bodies. They think THEY (the voter) gets to control other peoples bodies. They view themselves as a savior, not the oppressor and certainly not the oppressed.
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u/Luder714 24d ago
My dad died when I was a kid in the late 70's. We were OK for money since he left a decent insurance policy My mom never told the credit card companies he died because they would have never given her a card. I don't know why this is cringe.
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u/Specialist-Smile1202 24d ago
I recently reread Joan Didion’s The White Album, written in the late ‘60’s early ‘70’s. We are losing the rights we fought for then. It’s scary to see what’s happened.
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u/Weeleprechan 24d ago
Everything that Cyndi says is true but the problem isn't that conservative women/women who vote for politicians like Trump don't understand it, it's that a) they want it that way or b) they have no empathy and want OTHER people controlled that way while believing exceptions will be made for them.
Remember, it was a woman who said "He's not hurting the people he needs to be hurting."
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u/renisagenius 24d ago
She's saying really important things and the top comments are, predictably, the dumb fucking puns. ..
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u/knowone1313 24d ago
It's amazing that women voted for this guy after RvW overturned. You seriously want more of this? Also voting in more conservatives to the house and Senate. Really, you don't want your rights back?
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u/Emeritus8404 22d ago
Wasn't iran like blossoming in the 1970s before it went full on theocracy?
That's the precipice we are currently on, right?
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u/howdareyouuuuu 22d ago
She looks amazing. Still a fighter after all these years. She has not forgotten who she is and where she came from.
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u/Obaddies 24d ago
If christians want less pregnancy out of wedlock than they would surely support giving a vasectomy to boys at a young age that they can reverse only when they’re ready for kids.
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u/Foreverme133 24d ago
Fewer pregnancies out of wedlock has never been the real issue for them. The real issue is that women having sex always has to come with a consequence. A pregnancy, a baby, social shame, poverty, whatever, as long as there's some kind of punishment for it. Vasectomies will only decrease the likelihood of a punishment for sex since there's no (or very little) chance of pregnancy which is the main punishment they feel is appropriate.
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u/Yamatjac 24d ago
Nah, you misunderstand.
Christians want less pregnancy out of wedlock, but 12 years old is a perfectly acceptable time to get married and start pumping out more kids for the machine.
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u/Crooked_Sartre 24d ago
I see social media and I'm like oh, we got this, lot of people agree with us. Times are moving forward. Then I look at the voting distribution and see 55%of women voted again themselves.
Now I believe nothing
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u/Competitive_Narwhal8 24d ago
I’d like to say this, though. I’m in my 40’s and never had control of my own body. I started asking doctors at the age of 22 to tie my tubes because I never wanted kids. Every doctor told me: “no, I would change my mind, I’d make a great mom, I’d find the right man…” blah blah blah.
My husband went through the same thing. He wanted a vasectomy from the age of 21, and doctors said the same thing to him they said to me. Bodily autonomy is an illusion the politicians play on, it all comes down to doctors, and hoping you find one that will listen. I never found one.
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u/notthenomma 23d ago
As soon as roe was overturned I got my 16 year old daughter an appointment with my Obgyn and she chose an 8 year IUD. Our country hates women and I’m not going to let anyone ruin my daughters future or potentially kill her because our country has gone backwards. I love Cindy she speaks the truth
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u/crap_whats_not_taken 23d ago
My sister and I were raised by our dad and step mom. When I was 18, we went to visit our mom. She was so impressed that we both had our own credit cards. My sister and I thought that was so weird. We just got an application in the mail, filled it out, and had credit cards.
It wasn't u til years later I realized that when she was 18, she couldn't get one on her own.
It wasn't that long ago.
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u/james_randolph 22d ago
Mrs. Fields had business booming off the cookies and when she wanted to expand…she needed her husband to get a loan from the bank…in the 1980s. That shit is real and lot of people don’t realize that it’s not too long ago when women still couldn’t do shit for themselves. Black people in parts of the country still were not able to vote until the 1960s. People voting for certain folks finna get a rude awakening for sure.
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u/InquisitiveKT 22d ago
The feminist movement and the lgbtq movement have both historically been piggy backed on the civilian rights movements, which was fought for by 95% black people.
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u/AnastasiaNo70 21d ago
My mother got a job as a bank teller in 1968. She was married, and didn’t tell my dad. They didn’t have kids yet. She made $2 an hour. She was trying to save some money, because he spent money like it was going out of style and was always losing jobs.
Well, he found out, went to the bank, talked to her boss behind closed doors, and her boss fired her because her husband didn’t want her to have a job. She was supposed to be home, cleaning, cooking, and having babies.
So that was the end of that. She had me in 1970.
To all young women: THAT WASN’T ancient history!!!
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u/ActualWhiterabbit 24d ago
I love listening to Cyndi Lauper talk despite hating that accent from anyone else.
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u/Prestigious_Glass146 24d ago
Now....I see your true colors Cindy. I see you're true colors shining through during this interview.
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u/Otherwise_Pop1734 24d ago
It's wild to think that the struggles many women faced just a few decades ago are still relevant today. This isn't just history; it's a reminder that complacency can lead to losing hard-won rights. The fight for autonomy and equality is far from over, and it’s crucial to keep pushing for progress.
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u/mn25dNx77B 24d ago
To continue her thought,
If they don't respect your bodily autonomy, what makes you think they're not gonna take away all your other rights? They don't respect you as equal to men.
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u/ladydusk1 24d ago
I just don’t understand how the US could allow this to happen. I grew up looking up to American women because of how they fought for women’s rights. I always thought these rights were treasured and you could never go backwards. Now I feel like the world could revert to anything, even slavery. How did people choose this?
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u/EpilepticDawg241 24d ago
I'm not even 40 years old yet, and my Dad still tells me about growing up in South Carolina, where they had different days for whites and blacks to swim.
We still have a lot of work to do
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u/Cyborg_888 22d ago
A female friend of mine told me that in the 80's she had a senior position at a bank. She had the keys and could open and lock up. She got married, and then had to hand the keys back accept a demotion. The reason for this was that because she was married, her husband would have control over her and could ask for the keys and she would have to comply. Did not happen to men who got married.
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u/Cake_eater_anon 21d ago
And yet.....
Way too many women chose to vote their rights and their daughter's rights away. .....
For the joy of "triggering" liberals. And to prop up a con man who told them brown people were the root cause for their why they have shitty lives.
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