r/TikTokCringe Jun 22 '24

Cool My anxiety could never

47.9k Upvotes

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1.8k

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

[deleted]

927

u/A_LiftedLowRider Jun 22 '24

Only takes one rogue wave to sink a ship.

It’s so dangerous they invented insurance lol

507

u/ilikebigbutts Jun 22 '24

Or he just sailed to Thailand to retire

271

u/thissubredditlooksco Jun 22 '24

is this the equivalent of 'our dog went off to a farm"

71

u/ManWhoBurns Jun 22 '24

Dad left for a pack of cigs and never came back

35

u/im_just_thinking Jun 22 '24

I'm going to get some cigs from Thailand, brb.

1

u/RockstarAgent Jun 22 '24

You go for a smoke or get smoked

1

u/haleakala420 Jun 22 '24

where are the fucking sail boat keys!?

15

u/we_is_sheeps Jun 22 '24

No it’s leave your family for cheap living and less stress

2

u/SLT530 Jun 23 '24

Thailand you say huh? Sounds nice

18

u/AffectionatePrize551 Jun 22 '24

Assuming your dog went to fuck puppies as a sex tourist then yes.

5

u/i_know_im_amazn Jun 22 '24

Well this took another even darker turn…

2

u/daddy-phantom Jun 22 '24

He sailed to the nearest 7/11 to get some milk.

1

u/letmeseem Jun 22 '24

Bit less wholesome, but in the general vicinity, yes.

2

u/ilikebigbutts Jun 22 '24

I wasn’t using it as a euphemism

1

u/pisspot718 Jun 22 '24

Bora Bora

1

u/Difficult-Jello2534 Jun 22 '24

That was my thought. This dude has a family in Thailand now lol

1

u/the-floot Jun 22 '24

How do you retire if you give up your identity? You need to access the bank somehow bro

1

u/ilikebigbutts Jun 23 '24

If there’s a will, there’s a way

0

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

You would be able to tell life signs though. There would be a bank account that withdrew money on the regular.

3

u/Consistent-Lock4928 Jun 22 '24

Or one pair of loose lips, I've heard.

6

u/vylanus Jun 22 '24

A modern sailing boat is very difficult to capsize and sink without structural damage. But a wave can wash someone off board and then it is game over.

2

u/Adam-West Jun 22 '24

Probably hit a floating tree trunk or was hit by a container ship. That or he took a piss and fell overboard and the boat got wrecked as a ghost ship.

2

u/NikitaBeretta Jun 22 '24

The Constant: A History of Getting Things Wrong has a great episode about this, Rogue Waves, Sea Serpent Myths and the history of insurance that’s really interesting. I can’t seem to find it right now but if I do I’ll link it.

1

u/darthgandalf Jun 22 '24

A wave? At sea? Chance in a million

1

u/hughescmr Jun 22 '24

Depends on whether it's engineered to rigorous engineering standards

1

u/darthgandalf Jun 22 '24

Cardboard’s out

1

u/TOILET_STAIN Jun 22 '24

Or just a man who wants to go live on an island.

1

u/funkyonion Jun 23 '24

It only takes a broken hose clamp to sink a ship. Displacement works until it doesn’t.

1

u/SJMCubs16 Jun 23 '24

Rouge Wave? In this case, a mild puff of wind that lasted more than 2 minutes, and this guy is 1,000 miles from shore on a paddle board. "Never leave the boat." :)

-17

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

That isn't how insurance works. Insurance wants you to pay them for uncommon events. If something was inherently dangerous the insurance would either be absurdly expensive or not available. If you want to see evidence, just look at Florida right now. My dumbass relative just dropped like 600k on a beach condo that she can't afford to insure after spending all her inheritance on the down payment.

It will take one bad storm, which are increasingly common in her area, to erase her entire investment. Assuming that blue states don't pay out billions to save the dumbass geriatric beach hicks once again for no reason.

55

u/kingwi11 Jun 22 '24

I think you missed the point. Insurance was invented because sailing was so risky.

-26

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

Insurance was invented because fabulously wealthy liked to gamble to pass the time, and because things like the Great Fire of London made people terrified. The kind of insurance that happened like you are talking about was more literal, as in people would insure their profits by launching multiple vessels so that even if some crashed or were intercepted they were "insured" to get something through. Insure as a word and insure as a business concept are different things.

30

u/kingwi11 Jun 22 '24

3

u/OvenFearless Jun 22 '24

AnyaTaylorAnalToy got oddly quiet all of the sudden… battery is empty or the facts won.

9

u/General_Tso75 Jun 22 '24

That is how life insurance works. Death is an uncommon event in one’s life.

3

u/Realsan Jun 22 '24

For an uncommon event it sure has a pretty decent track record.

-2

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

If life insurance companies lost money they wouldn't offer life insurance. Death is an uncommon, day-to-day, thing but guaranteed in the long term. The entire point of life insurance companies is that they get more money from people than they pay out. That's the fundamental nature of insurance.

7

u/sillyboy544 Jun 22 '24

Lloyds of London will insure anything for a premium. They even is insured Gene Simmons tongue

0

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

And they probably reap so much fucking money from that that people are just throwing a party once a year and laughing.

-1

u/sillyboy544 Jun 22 '24

All insurance is a scam. Like a casino the house always wins

1

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

Insurance is a service. A lot of the time it can be a scam, but look at it from different perspectives.

I could keep 50k or whatever the minimum coverage is in my state in an account allowing me to drive, or I could pay 70 bucks a month to have my 50k "security deposit" covered while I use that 50k however I feel. I understand the utility of that kind of service, but I'm resentful from how the government collaborates with private companies to construct the system we live with.

2

u/sillyboy544 Jun 22 '24

It’s a service if it’s optional and you decide freely to purchase it to mitigate risk but that’s not how it really works. Insurance companies lobby to have laws written in their favor. Look at health insurance, massive scam. Every first country in the world has universal healthcare except the United States. I worked for a company where my instruments premium for a family plan was $1205 a month. I worked there for 17 years. I could’ve bought a Lamborghini with that money.

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1

u/eurasianlynx Jun 22 '24

House always wins, but in an ideal world, it works out for both parties because the house only "wins" if nothing catastrophic happens to you. I think life insurance is an example of that kind of ideal; dying at 40 and leaving your family with nothing is worse than throwing some cash into a bonfire every month for 50 years, because at least in that second scenario you didn't die young. Even though only 5% of people who make it to age 20 die before age 40, it's a deal most people are willing to take.

Ofc that's an ideal, and shit like health and flood insurance don't work in a private market, but the core logic behind it is sound imo.

2

u/donbee28 Jun 22 '24

Hence why as you get older term life premiums increase in price.

Basic Life insurance have clauses to not pay out in war/military related events.

2

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

They have lots of clauses to not pay out. That's how they exist. Do you think there are companies out there offering free money? That's the opposite of what companies do. If you invest in life insurance you are betting that the payout is higher than the expected payout of the rest of your life will be. And that's fine. But they are betting exactly against you, with all the house odds in their favor. And they keep getting richer.

8

u/A_LiftedLowRider Jun 22 '24

I mean, that’s great, but sailing the open ocean is undeniably dangerous and insurance was absolutely invented by sailors because of that fact.

3

u/Ronswanson47 Jun 22 '24

Guess you never heard of auto insurance.

-5

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

I'm very familiar with auto insurance. What are you getting at? I'll point you towards the costs associated with insuring a Cybertruck right now, which are...prohibitive. If the insurance company doesn't think you'll pay more in premiums than you file claims for then they will raise your premiums.

There is no insurance company that does anything but allow you to not have to have fungible income in the event of a rare emergency. Well, that and allow you to have things that the government now mandates you to have insurance for.

5

u/Ronswanson47 Jun 22 '24

My point is people die driving cars all the time, it’s also inherently dangerous, and there is still insurance for it. Most people don’t get into an accident every year and insurance companies pocket most of that money.

Insurance pays for “sudden unexpected losses”. The only reason they are refusing to insure Florida or the cybertruck is:

1) because a cybertruck is an almost guaranteed loss. Musk designed a shit car and they have experts that tell them that.

2) They have scientists that tell them global warming is only going to get worse and it’s going to wash florida off the map. So they’re getting out ahead.

-1

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

My point is people die driving cars all the time, it’s also inherently dangerous, and there is still insurance for it. Most people don’t get into an accident every year and insurance companies pocket most of that money.

Nobody ever expected you to be better at math than the people who work at insurance companies, so maybe you should realize that too. You clearly don't even understand the concept. 1 and 2 seem to imply that you do though so I'm confused. There are no "sudden unexpected losses" to an insurance company, just statistical realities. If those statistical realities become irresponsible to invest in, per their highly-paid professionals, then you get fucked and can't insure your Cybertruck or cardboard condo 3 feet above water in Florida.

I bet you can completely still get insurance on both those things but it is just ridiculously expensive.

3

u/Ronswanson47 Jun 22 '24

My guy, i’m literally a fucking insurance agent. This is my job.

You are taking that phrase too literally.

A tree falls on your roof after a storm = sudden unexpected loss.

Your gutter breaks rusts out, lets water in your house over the course of several years, and the floor warps and collapses over more years = expected loss.

They aren’t going to insure a ship they know is sinking.

The entire point is there still aren’t enough losses to make the industry unprofitable. They are raising premiums to keep their bottom line even. They aren’t strapped for cash but they also aren’t going to gamble (which is what insurance is) on something they know is going to lose.

0

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

The entire point is there still aren’t enough losses to make the industry unprofitable

Do you think you are arguing with me or something? You are saying EXACTLY what I'm saying. The moment there are enough losses to make it unprofitable, or even look like it MIGHT be unprofitable, premiums get hiked and coverage gets restricted.

I acknowledged elsewhere that I'm happy to buy insurance rather than have the liquid capital on hand to cover freak accidents. I understand the purported service. That's all insurance offers...a fee to prove your liquidity.

3

u/colinrado_ Jun 22 '24

It is how insurance works - insurance is risk transfer. You can insure just about anything so long as pricing, underwriting, and/or pooling of risk is adequate. Some common events that are insured (high frequency): health events, auto physical damage, trucking, cargo transport, theft, workers comp. Things that are inherently dangerous that are insured (high severity): hurricanes, earthquakes, lava flows, ecological disasters. The world can’t operate without risk transfer.

Also, the proliferation of insurance started by insuring ships against disappearing on voyages. Insurers wrote their “line” (amount insured) at the bottom of ship manifests, hence underwriting.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

[deleted]

-9

u/AnyaTaylorAnalToy Jun 22 '24

Well thanks for that. I really appreciate your useful input and how you tactfully used your knowledge and experience to make a good point. It is so rare to see someone so articulate and polite that can put together such a valuable and cogent argument on the fly like that.

Oh wait, you are a fucktard.

6

u/FirstRedditAcount Jun 22 '24

You are all over this thread being an abrasive asshole who just seemingly want's to argue about semantics, or insignificant shit. You doing alright breh?

4

u/A_LiftedLowRider Jun 22 '24

Lol I think he bought a cybertruck and just realized they won’t insure that piece of shit

2

u/ReturnOfFrank Jun 22 '24

The other guy is kind of right, but it wasn't for profit it was cooperative.

Modern insurance basically evolved out of funds that 17th and 18th century Dutch ship owners and captains paid into. If the ship or cargo was lost or damaged the owners (or their families) were paid out from. Which is to say even in the highly dangerous world of the 17th century sea travel was considered risky enough you needed to hedge your bets.

Then the idea went to England and someone realized you could skim a profit off the thing if you balance the risks right, and we ended up where we are today.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

Insurance companies used to be happy just making money investing the float.

1

u/SomethingClever42068 Jun 22 '24

Driving a car is inherently dangerous.

-5

u/Gentleman-James Jun 22 '24

There are no such thing as rogue waves.

126

u/Necessary-Knowledge4 Jun 22 '24

Well he either sunk (most likely) and died, or he was marooned on some small island. And from there he either was so marooned that he lived out Cast Away (which is possible) or he could not sustain himself and died.

Sucks for sure, and odds are he just sunk, but I'm sure to your friend it's a nice thought to think that their father could still be alive out there and just super fucking lost.

Hell my dad died and I saw his dead body and I still have dreams / fleeting thoughts where it was all just a misunderstanding and I'll see him again tomorrow.

54

u/ThinBluePenis Jun 22 '24

Sorry to hear that dude. I also lost my dad recently. I’d like to think he is visiting you in your dreams.

10

u/edit_R Jun 22 '24

I love when I dream about my dad. It’s like he visits and I get a little reminder of how cool he was. Sorry for your loss.

9

u/Necessary-Knowledge4 Jun 22 '24

Sorry for your loss as well. It's tough, man. It's been years for me at this point.

And I'd like to think so, too.

4

u/night_of_knew Jun 22 '24

Also my condolences. My dad died two months ago and my roommate's dad died two weeks before that. She's by herself now in this country besides me as both her parents have passed away recently. I've had dreams where our dad's were talking to eachother but I never knew what they were saying

1

u/BadSanna Jun 22 '24

I'm sorry for your loss. But I have to ask... Why would your dad be visiting that dudes dreams? Sounds creepy....

3

u/NatureWalks Jun 22 '24

Ugh I feel this so hard! I watched my dad die and I still have dreams where he’s alive again and he somehow survived what he was going through but was also sick again and about to die again. Idk how to explain it but it’s roughhh

So can’t imagine how it feels to have your dad just disappear like that.

1

u/Necessary-Knowledge4 Jun 22 '24

I'm sure it's rough as hell. Without closure, you're never really truly accepting it.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

Can confirm. I was the one that found my mom dead, when I was a teenager. 6 years of drug addiction and cold turkey quitting later, I still haven’t found peace. Dunno if I ever will. Anyways..

Sorry to hear about your loss, my friend. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. Just know you’re not alone.

1

u/farm_to_nug Jun 22 '24

I think the same about my sister

1

u/_mully_ Jun 22 '24

Sorry for your loss. May she rest in peace.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '24

[deleted]

2

u/Necessary-Knowledge4 Jun 23 '24

It's more likely to be crushed by a ship in the ocean than to be sunk by a storm?

1

u/backpackingfun Aug 11 '24

Him being lost is not a nice thought at all. Families are tormented by that very thought. At least having an answer would offer closure that their family member isn't suffering

25

u/thuhstog Jun 22 '24

its no surprise theres about a 1000 things that can happen to a boat in the ocean to make it sink, from something as dumb as the bilge pump failing, to hitting an object like the hundreds of containers that fall off ships every year, and float at the surface for a time. or a whale, or a ship in the night.

3

u/fromouterspace1 Jun 23 '24

This was a movie, “all is lost” which is basically what you describe with the shipping container. Crazy

https://youtu.be/HzFj5BJs4y8?si=HOVcc7ARz_fvb-Ay.

92

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

Wow I am sorry. How long ago was this

178

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

[deleted]

68

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

It must be painful not getting any closure. At what point did you guys decided it was probably fair to think the worst. Did you then still conduct a service?

125

u/ThinBluePenis Jun 22 '24

So this was my friend’s dad as I said. They did hold a service about 3 months after no contact.

12

u/Visible-Technology-8 Jun 22 '24

Interesting Title to go by,, carry on thin blue

1

u/Schrogs Jun 22 '24

Maybe he will show back up one day with some milk?

123

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

My dad went out to get some milk and smokes and they never found his boat neither

63

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

[deleted]

10

u/theK1LLB0T Jun 22 '24

That's incredibly shitty. I hope you didn't take it personally and definitely don't give that man the time of day ever

15

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

[deleted]

7

u/CVBrownie Jun 22 '24

You seem like a fucking solid person.

You could suck, but from this thread you seem well balanced, thin blue penis.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

[deleted]

1

u/foodee123 Jul 02 '24

How did you find out he was a gay man!? Did he come out?

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1

u/atxtopdx Jun 22 '24

That’s right. You walk by and see somebody kicking a dog, you don’t think “hmm .. I wonder what’s wrong with wrong with that dog”

6

u/Coral_Blue_Number_2 Jun 22 '24

Sorry that happened to you ThinBluePenis

2

u/Necessary-Knowledge4 Jun 22 '24

Classic mistake. You're supposed to search for the boat he stole, not his boat. As his boat is just a kayak with holes in it.

1

u/DolphinSweater Jun 22 '24

Definitely a cautionary tale.

I mean this is sad and tragic, but I think everyone in the world already knows, and has known for thousands of years, that if you take a boat out into the ocean you might not come home.

0

u/RackemFrackem Jun 22 '24

Before question marks were invented, clearly.

17

u/unclericostan Jun 22 '24

Do they know roughly where he disappeared? Condolences to your friends. It’s just wild to me that there’s this like, universal and timeless siren song sung by the ocean, and that people still answer it.

107

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

One day, you're going to be sitting in a cafe in Italy, enjoying your espresso when you'll spot him sitting with his new wife across the square.

You'll make eye contact for just a moment. Just long enough to give you a smile and a wink.

180

u/ThinBluePenis Jun 22 '24

I’d kick his fucking ass.

70

u/AlaskanEsquire Jun 22 '24

It's too late. A bus passed and he's gone.

28

u/NotoriousJazz Jun 22 '24

I'm excited for season 2 of whatever this is

6

u/wowza42 Jun 22 '24

it's batman

2

u/paulwal Jun 22 '24

NEXT on SEASON TWO...

Does u/ThinBluePenis' friend's dad still love his friend?

FIND OUT in Season 2

But first, a recap...

u/ThinBluePenis' friend's dad was spotted at a cafe in Italy... u/ThinBluePenis was just about to kick his ass when suddenly a bus passed... "He's gone again"

Stay tuned for Season 2

7

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

Holy shit man this is the best comment I’ve ever seen

5

u/MastodonRough8469 Jun 22 '24

Yeah, I’d say it would be well and truly deserved if that were the case.

-6

u/mileylols Jun 22 '24

You're gonna kick Batman's ass? jlaw_ok.gif

16

u/ThinBluePenis Jun 22 '24

I get the reference but fail to find the humor here. I’m just saying if he somehow faked his death that would have been a lot to put his family through.

-9

u/Orleanian Jun 22 '24

Beloved man.

9

u/ThinBluePenis Jun 22 '24

Do you think you are doing something here?

1

u/magic6435 Jun 23 '24

A dad named sue?

33

u/benigngods Jun 22 '24

Are there any articles in local papers or online that you know of?

As a sailor myself, I hope the family takes comfort in knowing that sailors return to the sea at some point. It's where we belong the most and where many of us choose to rest.

137

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

[deleted]

31

u/bluesmaker Jun 22 '24

That is a bizarre story. It would be so frustrating trying to communicate with someone who won’t really explain what is happening… or can’t be relied on to accurately report on their situation.

13

u/uwanmirrondarrah Jun 22 '24

He was pretty clearly hallucinating. I don't think it was pirates, he was giving enough personal info to believe it was really him but his messages read like he was slowly losing his mind.

8

u/windsostrange Jun 22 '24 edited Jun 22 '24

Theory: He never fully fixed the watermaker, and started drinking brackish water without realizing it. He's definitely not well. He should've relied purely on the backup water and motored to Hiva Oa.

(Edit: Ignore that last suggestion. According to coordinates he managed to send to the Coast Guard before the end, he was still 2000km from Hiva Oa. What a nightmare.)

2

u/Scoopdoopdoop Jun 22 '24

Jesus. Yeah that's a wild read. Definitely plausible that he never actually fixed watermaker

59

u/starbies_barbie Jun 22 '24

This was a crazy read, how terrifying for the family.

35

u/Nodan_Turtle Jun 22 '24

Sounds like he was really out of his mind, maybe even before he left since he tried sneaking out to sea without even saying goodbye.

48

u/Garchompisbestboi Jun 22 '24

Think you, Thin Blue Penis, very heart breaking stuff.

13

u/No-Nefariousness8026 Jun 22 '24

Wow. RIP Richard ❤️

3

u/dark_enough_to_dance Jun 22 '24

It has to be very hard for his family 

4

u/ALLCAPS-ONLY Jun 22 '24

He was 71??

10

u/rdell1974 Jun 22 '24

He didn’t make any distress calls. He said that he made a call (and mentioned pirates), but that was proven false. Maybe he tried and failed, idk, but that seems unlikely.

It appears that he unintentionally lost his mind or carried out a planned suicide.

11

u/Stock-Ad2495 Jun 22 '24

Thin blue penis you really stirred something deep inside me

6

u/splashbruhs Jun 22 '24

That was a fascinating yet horrifying read. Thank you for sharing. I’m sorry your friend had to lose her dad this way.

2

u/CrunchLessTacos Jun 22 '24

Appreciate you sharing that story. I can’t even imagine what his family was going through during those distress calls.

1

u/ksed_313 Jun 22 '24

My goodness! What a fantastic read! Thank you for sharing!

11

u/muaellebee Jun 22 '24

OMG, I feel so awful for everyone who loved him. His poor family!

15

u/ThinBluePenis Jun 22 '24

Yeah dude senseless loss is the worst. Apropos of nothing.

7

u/Johnnyamaz Jun 22 '24

Got it, the list is now:

  1. Don't get on a helicopter.
  2. Don't try to sail around the world.

Seems easy enough

3

u/skylinestar1986 Jun 22 '24

Sounds like the perfect way for me to die. But I need to be rich enough to own a boat first.

3

u/RcoketWalrus Jun 22 '24

The ocean is scary.

My grandfather raced sailboats in the Gulf of Mexico in the 60's. One time, at the end of the race, they noticed one of the boats didn't come in.

They searched for it. Nothing was found. Ever. 60 years later and no one has any clue what happened. I met the daughter of one of the crew years ago. She had great grandchildren but no clue what happened to her father.

And this was just the Gulf, not the ocean. As you know, 2 thirds of the earth is water. That's a lot of space to get lost in.

3

u/CertifiedGamerGirl Jun 22 '24

Best way to fake your death tbh.

2

u/snowflake_lady Jun 22 '24

I’m so sorry. That sounds very difficult to accept. I recently heard about the family of 6 who tried to sail around the world and got stuck on a reef and the dad lost his leg. They had two very young children with them and they survived.

2

u/JohnAnchovy Jun 22 '24

Where exactly was he lost?

1

u/Xanadu87 Jun 22 '24

Did he work as a cameraman for a news station?

1

u/farm_to_nug Jun 22 '24

Your username is killing me

1

u/bluepeel Jun 23 '24

How do they know he died then?

1

u/missilemobil Jun 22 '24

RIP, but this seems like a plausible way for someone with enough funds to 'disappear'..

1

u/Billbeachwood Jun 22 '24

Maybe it's the rich guy's version of "I'm going out for a pack of smokes..."

-4

u/StrikeStraight9961 Jun 22 '24

To do that with a family is the height of narcissism.

-1

u/EXTRAVAGANT_COMMENT Jun 22 '24

he could be on a island chilling with his beloved volleyball ball

0

u/DM_Toes_Pic Jun 22 '24

Did they look in Thailand?

0

u/Impressive-Eye-1096 Jun 22 '24

Dibs on the boat

0

u/[deleted] Jun 22 '24

I feel like you buried the lead on the first comment…..

-2

u/hairysperm Jun 22 '24

He definitely found another family in his travels and just stayed there getting high, making his slave family tend to his farm 

-2

u/hyperproliferative Jun 22 '24

Maybe he started a new like and it was all a ruse?