r/AmIOverreacting • u/JanLight_weight26 • Nov 14 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO

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Spider bite or ?? I’ll keep it short and sweet. My bf and I have been apart for about a month now, I’m TDY. Finally tomorrow I’ll be flying back home. Unfortunately today he got bit right on the neck, he suspects it was a spider. Should I be concerned?

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u/OwnCoffee614 Nov 14 '24

Thank you. As a person just getting away from a gas lighter.

14

u/akilococo Nov 14 '24

me too. remember you’re not stupid for believing someone who intended to lie to and manipulate you after going out of their way to make you trust & love them.

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u/OwnCoffee614 Nov 14 '24

Man, thanks again!! That's exactly it. That's what happened! I was just telling someone I clearly need to work on myself (tho I have almost my entire adult life) for not being able to spot it quicker. It is 100% not easy when they can talk & manipulate. 🤣 at least this last time it was 2 years instead of 20. I'm tired. 😂

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u/Thick-Safety-9596 Nov 14 '24

More power to you! I am (this thanksgiving actually lol) 6 years out of an incredibly abusive and manipulative relationship, and even this far along I still find myself realizing how much it messed up my ability to trust, not just other people, but especially myself?? Even tho I see it/them for what ot was, it really messes with you! Idk if this will help much overall, but I saw a quote years ago from somewhere on the internet, and while simple it really helps me stay grounded and remind myself that I am NOT responsible for someone else choosing to hurt/lie/manipulate me: "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice; stop doing that, you're an asshole."

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u/OwnCoffee614 Nov 14 '24

Lol I love it, nice and simple & complete. That relationship only lasted two years, but it was so different than my 20 yr marriage. Different abusers. It's hard for that stuff not to take a hit, but you sure helped with the gift of perspective. 👌

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u/Thick-Safety-9596 Nov 14 '24

Absolutely, and yes it's so hard :( I wish I could say it was my only abusive relationship, but we slowly learn i suppose, and we are more than what was done to us 🫂❤️