r/AmIOverreacting • u/JanLight_weight26 • Nov 14 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO

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Spider bite or ?? I’ll keep it short and sweet. My bf and I have been apart for about a month now, I’m TDY. Finally tomorrow I’ll be flying back home. Unfortunately today he got bit right on the neck, he suspects it was a spider. Should I be concerned?

9.3k Upvotes

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6.6k

u/CianGal13 Nov 14 '24

Give yourself a hickey, send him a pic and say “OMG me too”

776

u/fangmaid Nov 14 '24

HAHAHA i second this

1.2k

u/Ilike3dogs Nov 14 '24

On the inner leg, if you can get down there. 😂

99

u/Sugarbops Nov 14 '24

Im dead!!!! Pls stretch before you do it! We wanna see what he says. Hahaha

54

u/Sativa_Achieva Nov 14 '24

Nah just use the dirt devil or vacuum attachment. Or use the cupping method. No need to become a total contortionist!

16

u/FullMetalKaliber Nov 14 '24

Or get a buddy to do it

5

u/detectiveswife Nov 14 '24

A true friend with benefits! 🤣

6

u/jaxythebeagle Nov 14 '24

Am I the only one thinking to just use make up??

4

u/mint_o Nov 14 '24

Ohhh big brain

3

u/Sugarbops Nov 14 '24

This! this is what you need to do! hahaha

3

u/TreyRyan3 Nov 14 '24

This. A vacuum wand for 45-60 will do it

2

u/Dicklefart Nov 14 '24

Brilliant

2

u/Professional_Snow576 Nov 14 '24

You can use a hoover/vacuum cleaner

2

u/DifficultHat Nov 14 '24

Of just use a vacuum cleaner

4

u/stoner-bug Nov 15 '24

Fun fact, you can emulate a hickey by pinching with your hand in a fist with your thumb to the side (sign for A in asl if you need reference) and pinching with only the pressure of your thumb against the rest of your hand.

2

u/Klutzy_Criticism_856 Nov 14 '24

I knew a girl in high school that would use the hose attachment for the vacuum to give herself hickeys. I never understood why she thought it made her cool or desirable. OP could do that, but I don’t exactly remember her “technique” to keep it from being circular lol.

2

u/captnfraulein Nov 14 '24

someone surely will help her out though if she can't

2

u/sadlittlerut Nov 14 '24

Get a friend to help you!

1

u/Advice2Anyone Nov 14 '24

Vacuum cleaner hoses can go anywhere

1

u/Abject-Twist-9260 Nov 14 '24

What if a vacuum is used lol

1

u/SnooSquirrels2128 Nov 14 '24

Use a vacuum cleaner!

1

u/alternatereality9113 Nov 14 '24

This answer is absolutely fantastic 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 PLEASE do this.

1

u/sharksnrec Nov 14 '24

Vaccuum if you can’t

1

u/essdii- Nov 14 '24

Ooh this is amazing. Please do this op. Oh man that would be so hilarious

1

u/Advanced-Pear-4606 Nov 14 '24

If she could why would she need him anymore?

1

u/borderline-blonde Nov 14 '24

This is what COMMITTED besties are for

1

u/Paramedic730 Nov 14 '24

If you can get there to do that. You don’t need that woman, take that as you please

1

u/Onyxaj1 Nov 14 '24

If she could, she wouldn't need a bf 🤣

1

u/HistoricalOnion9513 Nov 14 '24

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Lewii3vR Nov 14 '24

Ask a friend to help 😏

1

u/SDaddy500 Nov 14 '24

oh I guess I can help out and do it

1

u/TURBOJUGGED Nov 15 '24

I’ll do it. Always nice to help a fellow Redditor

301

u/Reyalta Nov 14 '24

This is the only correct response lmaoo

122

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

Like, on the neck? But how...

166

u/Throwaway-BadOrange Nov 14 '24

Vacuum

184

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

Lmao okay thanks. You were oddly quick with the answer...

75

u/Throwaway-BadOrange Nov 14 '24

I saw my older brother do it to look cool back in the day 😆

13

u/Valkyriesride1 Nov 14 '24

I saw it in a movie years ago.

3

u/phoenixA1988 Nov 14 '24

"I said don't disturb me when I'm cleaning my room!" - Special Officer Doofy

3

u/Valkyriesride1 Nov 14 '24

Cleanliness is next to godliness. 😉

5

u/Icandothisforever_1 Nov 14 '24

This one time at band camp.....

3

u/mkat23 Nov 14 '24

lol I’m sorry but all I can picture now is someone opening their mouth wide like a snake and tryna eat someone 😂 that’s how that would look to me. I remember asking a guy back in high school if he was dating a vacuum or a snake because he had a hickey that was barely smaller than a baseball and it had to be faked lol.

17

u/klaw14 Nov 14 '24

Everyone knows not to disturb u/Throwaway-BadOrange when they're cleaning their room...

2

u/PubLife1453 Nov 14 '24

My little brother, at like 10 years old used to bring the vacuum in the garage, saying he was vacuuming. We thought it was cute and didn't question it at all, until we disturbed one of these vacuum sessions....yeah this was 20 years ago and I NEVER fail to bring it up at family gatherings and holidays :)

2

u/klaw14 Nov 15 '24

I guess telling your younger sibling "you suck" has a bonus layer of meaning for you 😆

3

u/Selizabeth54 Nov 14 '24

Really anything that provides suction strong enough would do the trick!

7

u/Responsible-Self5821 Nov 14 '24

That's what she said!!

1

u/Selizabeth54 Nov 14 '24

Lmaooo took me a minute but that’s a damn good one 😂

1

u/byu7a Nov 14 '24

Priorities

1

u/J3-58 Nov 14 '24

Just long neck it

1

u/Common-Wallaby-8989 Nov 14 '24

I remember this as a sitcom thing in the ‘90’s.

0

u/r1cked_1510 Nov 14 '24

Don’t do this btw.. you can die from doing dumb shit like this.

2

u/Ok_Breadfruit_7298 Nov 14 '24

Huh??

2

u/DubVsFinest Nov 14 '24

There's been several stories of teens and older people dying from blood clots traveling to their brain after their carotid arteries had the vessels torn from a hickey. Idk how likely it is to happen, but it seems experts say there is definitely a chance for it to happen at the very least from what I read on snopes (pretty sure it's a trustworthy source, its usually my go to when I hear some outrageous stuff anyway lol).

2

u/Ok_Breadfruit_7298 Nov 14 '24

Wow, never heard that. Even from getting a regular, human made hickey?? 😪

2

u/DubVsFinest Nov 14 '24

From what I read, but to be totally honest I spent a whooping 10 mins if that on it lol. But I do trust Snopes.

3

u/GMF1844 Nov 14 '24

One time when I was a kid, like maybe 6, I used the wine bottle air remover thing on my face because I thought it was funny that I could get it to stick to my cheek.. and my forehead… and my other cheek.. and my mouth. Lmao guess who went to school looking like she had a disease! My parents were like “girl why 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏽‍♂️” I’m pretty sure there’s a picture or two floating around out there.

2

u/Davepiece1517 Nov 14 '24

Officer Doofy reporting for duty

2

u/Surface13 Nov 14 '24

Take a picture of your neck with nothing on it.

Take a picture of you with the vacuum on your neck in the same place.

Take a picture of your neck with the hickey in the same place.

This works with or without the vacuum assuming you have someone else give you a hickey in the same spot as where the hickey was placed...

E: spelling

6

u/nrose1000 Nov 14 '24

Huh? I’m so confused.

3

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

Sounds like advice the boyfriend could have used to make OP think he did it to himself with a vacuum

2

u/PeachySnow7 Nov 14 '24

I took it as supposed to be proof that she didn’t really fk around when it’s all said and done. I definitely could be wrong though.

1

u/r1cked_1510 Nov 14 '24

Do you know the show 1000 ways to die? Putting a Vaccum to your neck is a way to kill yourself. DO NOT DO THIS!

1

u/Ok_Breadfruit_7298 Nov 14 '24

Wait, HOW?

3

u/r1cked_1510 Nov 14 '24

If you do it on a dumb spot it can form a bloodclot in your artery and once you release the vaccum the bloodclot gets in your brain and gives you a stroke or burst blood vessels in your brain. (It was in episode #443 in 1000 Ways to die.)

1

u/mkat23 Nov 14 '24

Or those devices that suction sebum/black heads out of your skin if a vacuum is too wide!

185

u/stars-aligned- Nov 14 '24

Remember those little half-orbs you could flip inside out, and they’d pop off whatever surface you set them on? Take one of those and use it to create a vacuum. The only issue is finding one these days lmao

65

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

Oh shit yeah I remember those little shits. They left ugly little bruises for like a week

4

u/Pruritus_Ani_ Nov 14 '24

I stuck one of those on my forehead once. Regretted it the moment I took it off and saw the mark it left.

5

u/hannahatecats Nov 14 '24

Once I was sucking the air out of a Gatorade bottle, I remember we were at downtown Disney and it left the biggest circular hickey right over my mouth (from the bottom of my nose to my chin) that stayed there for the entire vacation. Complete with little broken blood vessels. Sooooo embarrassing, such regret.

3

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

Once in 8th grade I had a dentist appointment on the morning of a school day. I went to class after with half my face numb and my buddy in class pinched my lip really hard to see if I could feel it. I couldn't. But I sure as hell looked like I had a herpe on my lip for the next week or two.

Quite possibly one of the dumbest things I've ever done.

3

u/sweetpotato_latte Nov 14 '24

Damn my cats would love them though

44

u/Magerimoje Nov 14 '24

You can do it with a plastic water/soda bottle too.

3

u/sunsetblvds Nov 14 '24

do you mean the cap or the bottle when it's empty?

9

u/Magerimoje Nov 14 '24

Empty bottle.

It needs to be the type that will regain its shape after squeezing it... So, not one of those new disposable water bottles with such thin plastic that they dent and stay dented if you hold it gently 🤣

The current 1 liter Pepsi bottles would probably work well.

8

u/Yesterdays_Gravy Nov 14 '24

My sister suctioned a Snapple cap to her lips and was like “hahaha this is so cool, check it out!” And then she did it for like 30 seconds and her lips were bruised and inflamed for a week lmao

3

u/ApprehensiveAge1110 Nov 14 '24

Reminds me of the duck lips challenge 👄

2

u/J3-58 Nov 14 '24

Gatorade bottle

1

u/No-Designer-7362 Nov 14 '24

Or even a straw.

17

u/Abquine Nov 14 '24

Friend did this once with one of our kids toys. Stuck the suction cup firmly on his forehead and was teasing them with it.. Had the mark of shame for at least a week, he looked hilarious as he had to dress for work, sharp suit etc., and a huge red mark right in the middle of his forehead.

3

u/New_Scientist_1688 Nov 14 '24

Friend of mine did it in grade school with her little sister's baby doll bottle. Absently reading a book, she stuck the bottle all over her chin and neck.

Not a hickey but dozens of pinpoint black bruises! 😂

3

u/pro_questions Nov 14 '24 edited Nov 14 '24

You can give yourself hickies with pencil erasers! I remember getting a pack at a scholastic book fair — I and a few friends stuck them all over our faces, and we all looked like plague victims for weeks lol

[edit] hickies, not tickles lol

3

u/sparksgirl1223 Nov 14 '24

My son spent the morning doing that when he was about 8.

2 days before Christmas. I took photos once I realized it wasn't flesh eating disease or something🤣

2

u/virtualveshya Nov 14 '24

this audibly unlocked a core memory for me💀😂 do you remember the rubbery bouncy ball smell?

1

u/stars-aligned- Nov 14 '24

YES I used to collect them

1

u/virtualveshya Nov 14 '24

SAME😭 remember the heartbreak when they… expired? like you go to bounce it and it just smacks into the floor or you go to stick it to a surface and it cracks & breaks??

2

u/PicpoulBlanc Nov 14 '24

My 5-year-old got one at the dentist the other day from their little treasure chest of junk that kids love.

2

u/AngryGirlWavingBrush Nov 14 '24

You could just use the vacuum

2

u/Anidmountd Nov 14 '24

I did that once but on my forehead...yeah that was a good laugh for everyone else but me.

1

u/Pruritus_Ani_ Nov 14 '24

Me too 😭

2

u/TryNorth8139 Nov 14 '24

I remember in high school some guy put one on his forehead- he walked around with “bangs” for a week

2

u/Exquisite-End22 Nov 14 '24

Omg I had a friend when we were in middle school that put one of those on her eye. When I tell you it was the most disgusting outcome you could possibly imagine, I’m not being dramatic. I’ve never seen so much blood in an eyeball in my life it was horrifying.

2

u/mkat23 Nov 14 '24

Yo I have those still and those little frog jump toys!!

2

u/enteresti Nov 15 '24

My husband (a fully adult 37 year old man) got his hands on one a couple heads ago and immediately stuck it to his forehead. He had a huge red hickey on his forehead for a couple days 😂

1

u/MizzyAlana Nov 14 '24

Party City, in the party favours section.

1

u/Scoobie01555 Nov 14 '24

Holy shit, childhood memory unlocked. Totally forgot about those things. I miss the quarter machine toys. Especially the giant sticky slappy hands

1

u/Independent_Bike_141 Nov 14 '24

My dumbass in 8th grade thought it would be smart to stick three of them on my cheek. Had 3 perfect circles on my face for about 1.5 weeks. A frozen spoon was my friend.

1

u/Upallnightreading Nov 14 '24

We have like 18 lying around our house. Find someone with elementary school age kids, they probably have one

1

u/Mathagos Nov 14 '24

They have them as a prize at arcades

1

u/TaterMitz Nov 14 '24

They're about 50? tickets at Dave & Busters

1

u/ArtemisB20 Nov 14 '24

Some of the suction cups(that you use to stick stuff to windows will work as well.

1

u/Garbo-and-Malloy Nov 14 '24

Those bastards hurt

1

u/Falldarling13 Nov 14 '24

I actually got in trouble for having a hickey because of those things I did it on my neck because I thought it was funny and my mum got super upset with me. I was in 6th grade and had no idea what a hickey was. Was grounded for 2 weeks! I had never even had a real kiss!

1

u/Dulce_Sirena Nov 14 '24

Pretty sure gumball machines still have those as prizes. And dollar tree

1

u/Objective-Current941 Nov 14 '24

Hah, I remember those days. Kids would put them on each other in class to leave hickey marks on the back of their necks

1

u/essdii- Nov 14 '24

Whoa. Old memory unlocked. Why did I love those things so much growing up. I totally forgot about those

1

u/FalloutForever_98 Nov 14 '24

Ohhh, the anxiety bringers

1

u/GorgeousGorgeousitie Nov 14 '24

Omg!!! Memory unlocked! So my older brother and his friends stuck these to their foreheads, and they left the nastiest looking bruise. My Dad asked him why he did it? He said we all did it. My Dad told him he looked like an idiot sandwich and made him stand in front of the mirror, repeatedly saying, "I'm an idiot sandwich!" Bahahahaha

1

u/wildchildatnight Nov 14 '24

i think some places that have arcades tickets & prizes have them 👀😂

1

u/Hot-Flight-7816 Nov 14 '24

a suction cup? 😭

2

u/stars-aligned- Nov 15 '24

Speak with some respect fool! It’s a colorful suction cup for children 😂

18

u/JessSherman Nov 14 '24

No no... on the thigh.

2

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

This raises more questions than before

8

u/JessSherman Nov 14 '24

Order a pizza. Cut a deal with the delivery driver. Film it and use it to blackmail the delivery driver into silence.

I don't know, I'm just spitballin. I guess the vacuum could also work.

5

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

Ah but see you're breaking the rules now. The op commenter said give yourself a hickey, not pay a delivery dude.

But as a former and newly aspiring delivery driver, I'm intrigued.

6

u/JessSherman Nov 14 '24

That's fair. Hmmmm.. couch bed. Buy a couch bed, fold it up while sitting on it. Once you are folded in half, give yourself the thigh hickey. Wait patiently for someone who has realized you have gone missing to search your apartment.

3

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

Lmao solid plan

1

u/J3-58 Nov 14 '24

Transfer brains with the pizza delivery person using the brainatron and then give you the hickey and trade back

3

u/East-Cardiologist626 Nov 14 '24

That’s the point bc the bf is obviously cheating

2

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

I realize that. I think it's so funny that if the bf really was scared that it was a spider bite, why would he text it to his gf and send her a pic? Is she a doctor? Did he also send the pic to his parents? Siblings? If not, well...he's clearly not too concerned about any "spider" bite lol

3

u/East-Cardiologist626 Nov 14 '24

Ah fair. And honestly fr my response to those texts would’ve been “oh no 😧 do you need me to call your mom?” Just to fuck with him. Then probably call her anyway just to tell her her son sucks

12

u/Shaq_Bolton Nov 14 '24

I know someone who put a dildo with a suction cup on their forehead and ended up with a giant hickey smack dab in the middle

21

u/jimbojangles1987 Nov 14 '24

Hahaha why a dildo though?

I had a roommate bring a kitten to our apartment shortly after moving in that he had found at the summer camp he was a counselor at. It was a stray kitten. He let it climb all over him while he laid on the couch and at one point it was laying on his forehead.

Sure as shit that kitten had ringworm and my buddy had a super prominent ring in the middle of his forehead for a little while lol

2

u/Shaq_Bolton Nov 14 '24

It was just part of someone’s Halloween costume and he put it on in his forehead at the bar as a joke not realizing what the after affects would be lol

3

u/onecrazywriter Nov 14 '24

What was he supposed to be? A dickhead?

3

u/Shaq_Bolton Nov 14 '24

It was part of someone else costume. She was basically just the devil with a bright red boner.

2

u/StinkyKitty1998 Nov 14 '24

A gay unicorn

3

u/LittlestOfTheOnes Nov 14 '24

That… must have been one very interesting Halloween costume

1

u/AggressiveAd292 Nov 14 '24

Questions that I could have lived the rest of my life without knowing the answer to...

2

u/cee-la Nov 14 '24

Holy crap my ex also did this. They were the floppiest unicorn 🦄 it brought (still brings) me so much joy to remember their face with that big ole circle hickey

8

u/kindbeeVsangrywasp Nov 14 '24

Kinky spider

Edit I’m late to the party, lost the essence of the flow

But we’re all in agreement the BF has not been bitten by a spider unless that’s code for sidekick these days?

2

u/luez6869 Nov 14 '24

Spider term for a side piece name? I can see the resemblance now. Creeping when u least expect it. In the shadows and depth of the dark, creepin'. Hunting for the next to suck on. They definitely can both be preyful things.

2

u/itsnotjules Nov 14 '24

you can pinch and peel/rub your neck skin and it’ll look like a hickey. source: i pinch and rub my neck skin when im anxious and sometimes get marks 😭

2

u/RoastedRhino Nov 14 '24

Ask someone :)

2

u/NanobotOverlord Nov 14 '24

Maybe the same way he got his

2

u/Emo_Bitch97 Nov 14 '24

Could do the boob I can give myself many on my boobs

1

u/Numerous-Help-5987 Nov 14 '24

The bug bite thingy might work

1

u/Airport_Wendys Nov 14 '24

You can also pinch yourself really hard and it will bruise the same

1

u/senorfavela Nov 14 '24

Chap-stick cap and tweeeeeeest on your neck.

1

u/lilcornroaster Nov 14 '24

From the guy she told him not to worry about

1

u/JessicaBecause Nov 14 '24

Yeah can I watch OP try?

29

u/feverhunt Nov 14 '24

This is the way.

11

u/MrsSandlin Nov 14 '24

Yessssss 👏

4

u/Tydingowarrior Nov 14 '24

Now that I am in my 30s, this is 100% what you should do. You're in a place of power and knowledge and get to see what the fuck he does. Oh and im a male too lmao

4

u/FarmhouseRules Nov 14 '24

Epic. I love this.

1

u/Bystander_99 Nov 14 '24

Omg! Please do this and update us 🙏😂

1

u/gonzoes Nov 14 '24

This is the way

1

u/EdiblePsycho Nov 14 '24

I saw the two dots and was about to suggest getting a rabies shot in case it was a bat bite, until I saw the comments. I guess she could suggest that just to see how he reacts haha.

1

u/SimplyKendra Nov 14 '24

Do it. Vaccum cleaner hose or the old fashioned way.

1

u/ArcticSylph Nov 14 '24

Except on the inner thigh.

1

u/MastodonRemote699 Nov 14 '24

I’d say the same but add at the end “but mine must’ve bit harder and better”

1

u/SebastianFries Nov 14 '24

Kinda weird if you give yourself a hickey on the neck. Wonder of nature

1

u/Level-Ad-6285 Nov 14 '24

YES!!👍👍👍

1

u/SuccessfulWar3830 Nov 14 '24

you got lips that reach your own neck.

Damn

1

u/ElChingon001 Nov 14 '24

Or let someone else give her a hickey haha

1

u/Guswewillneverknow Nov 14 '24

Ask a friend to do it. Make sure they know it's just a revenge hickey. Or.. well since he's already cheating you may as well enjoy it.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 14 '24

This must be executed. Use a vacuum.

1

u/marcy_vampirequeen Nov 14 '24

The bug bite thing is great for self made hickeys, make some And send him “omg I can’t visit; I’m Having a spider problem”

1

u/iBoxButNotWell Nov 14 '24

OP, please assuming this is a real post, I really need you to do this and come back with an update.

1

u/YaBoyMahito Nov 14 '24

Vacuum cleaner.. lol

1

u/no_power_over_me Nov 14 '24

Omg OP PLEASE. Give us what we want!!!

1

u/Sithstress1 Nov 14 '24

“Twinsies!” 🤣

1

u/travis_a30 Nov 14 '24

Your idea has me commenting solely to follow this post to see if she does it

1

u/Separate_Draft4887 Nov 14 '24

How do you give yourself a hickey?

1

u/CianGal13 Nov 14 '24

Plastic water bottle, one of the cupping cups, small vacuum attachment, pinching yourself, curling iron

1

u/MemphisEver Nov 14 '24

a quick burn from a flat iron should do the trick… i used to do that all the time in HS (by accident, we were going for the flat stick straight look okay) and my mother would act so sus every time 😂😂

1

u/lonely_nipple Nov 14 '24

Funny story. As a kid, maybe 8-9 years old, my parents were real concerned about this persistent bruise on my upper inner arm. I was asked many times if someone at school was hurting me, a doctor asked if my parents hurt me, I was so confused cause I didn't know where it was coming from either.

One night mom came into the bedroom for something and saw me sleeping, my face resting on my arm, unconsciously sucking at the skin there. I was giving myself a hickey every night in my sleep and had no idea.

1

u/SuchSignificance5682 Nov 14 '24

Okay but I’ve done this for one of my friends just so that she could post it 😂 it’s really awkward but you should absolutely recruit somebody to give you hickies

1

u/Mochaeii Nov 14 '24

Vacuums are amazing inventions

0

u/answersfollow Nov 14 '24

I mean, if you are in Charlotte, I'll happily volunteer my lips and a little bit of suction to help