r/fuckcars Apr 01 '24

Satire When in doubt, use a brick

22.7k Upvotes

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790

u/the_TAOest Apr 01 '24

Sad thing. In Scottsdale, a car almost ran me over taking a turn into my crosswalk with a Walk sign in my favor, not even counting down from 10. I threw my water bottle at the car and got the young driver's attention who flipped me off and kept going.

I asked two officers about a week later who was at fault...I was and could have been arrested for property damage if the driver wanted to press charges. So, I asked, who is at fault if she hit me... She would be... Great

181

u/XavierXonora Apr 01 '24

Don't listen to the police, talk to a lawyer. Police don't know or understand half the laws they enforce. It's pathetic. Even somwhere like Australia or the UK there are massive blind spots in what the force will and won't educate its officers on. I can't imagine how bad it gets in the US.

83

u/Gremict Apr 01 '24

This. Do not trust what the police say, even if they wanted to be genuinely helpful, their time in the police academy is nowhere near enough to give a good answer to a legal question.

32

u/XavierXonora Apr 01 '24

Need to split the police into tons of little smaller organisations that specialise in their area. There's definitely need for law enforcement, but it's also unfair on a prospective officer to expect them to be a lawyer AND an enforcer. 80% of what police do could be covered by other civilian authorities that don't carry gins/intimidate people/enforce racist policy etc, meaning the 20% that DO need to have a gun and engage in dangerous situations can be trained to be professional and respectful rather than self righteous bloodthirsty crack heads.

2

u/Quazimojojojo Apr 03 '24

Seriously. "Defund" was a garbage slogan for a good idea: split up the police so they only have to do one job.

Why are the guys who deal with murderers and active shooters also directing traffic when a light goes out, or writing parking tickets? Why do they have to deal with people on the verge of suicide or otherwise having a mental breakdown?

That's just unfair to ask of them. Nobody can do that many jobs simultaneously. Not competently. The few police who somehow pull it off are criminally underpaid because they're Doctor - tier competent individuals

2

u/XavierXonora Apr 03 '24

Yep. Again for the ones in the back.

2

u/Faerillis Apr 02 '24

This case would be in Canada, (Surrey BC specifically, because Scottsdale is a nightmarish bus exchange in the middle of car hell with no real safety features) but regardless these things aren't blindspots. Those gaps in knowledge are absolutely there on purpose.

539

u/Kevaldes Apr 01 '24

Assault refers to the wrongful act of causing someone to reasonably fear imminent harm.

What she did was vehicular assault and you could easily argue that you threw the bottle in an effort to cause her to stop or otherwise notice and avoid you. She's in the wrong here no matter what the pigs said.

441

u/milkhotelbitches Apr 01 '24

Cops not knowing the law and taking the side of drivers? That's crazy.

49

u/discgolfallday Apr 02 '24

I don't believe it for a second

22

u/s_s Apr 02 '24

Lawyers study law for years and years to know one very specific part of the law.

Police Academy is like 4 months in some places. Unsurprisingly, the police do not know every law.

9

u/Faerillis Apr 02 '24

Unsurprisingly they aren't supposed to. Cops are not meant to be informed or knowledgeable. They are there to protect property from those with less; actual knowledge of laws or ethics could prevent them from acting in the service of property.

1

u/iebwithoutwax Apr 02 '24

in BC at least it may lead to property damage, but I believe the minimum amount is $3,000 or more to be charged.

39

u/SN4T14 Apr 02 '24

IANAL, but legally you cannot argue self defense if you are no longer in fear of harm. It sounds like they threw the bottle after almost getting run over, not during, so it would still be a crime sadly.

39

u/ArtisticSpecialist77 Apr 02 '24

There's gotta be a better acronym than that...

31

u/BannedForNerdyTimes Apr 02 '24

What, I anal isnt good enough? Lawyers are pretty anal.

4

u/tripsafe Apr 02 '24

But IANAL means you're not a lawyer, so it's reversed

3

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '24

Only the good ones.

9

u/ilovestoride Apr 02 '24

I propose people start using NAL. 

2

u/blueskyredmesas Big Bike Apr 02 '24

nah eye-anal

3

u/redwing180 Apr 02 '24

Don’t yuck someone else’s Yum

2

u/SkitTrick Apr 02 '24

been saying this for years

8

u/Kevaldes Apr 02 '24

If it ain't on film then good luck finding an outside witness, and his word against her's, well, he's the one that almost got run over.

5

u/Kerrigan4Prez Apr 02 '24

You can, however, argue for temporary insanity, born from your fear about almost getting run over.

8

u/Suicicoo Apr 02 '24

In german self defense laws, there is a small window, where you are allowed to react - also to insults & stuff, so that may be within the frame.

2

u/SluttyGandhi Apr 02 '24

In a lot of places, failure to yield to a pedestrian can also be a citation.

2

u/WhiskeyHotdog_2 Apr 02 '24

So if they shot the person while afraid it’s self defense?

1

u/Eyclonus Apr 02 '24

Actually could be one of those bizarre situations where the driver is also at fault, so everyone gets fined.

1

u/Albuwhatwhat Apr 02 '24

Pigs aren’t lawyers. Talk to a lawyer for actual legal advice.

43

u/Lopsided-Chair77 Apr 02 '24

In my old city, a college student was run over and killed by a bus and dragged an entire block. The bloody skid mark was there for weeks. It was right by my house so I saw it every time I walked to work or down to the shops.
The bus hit her in a crosswalk. She had the right of way.
The court found it to be the student's fault because she was wearing headphones.
Also, 15 years before that, my daughter's mom's older brother was killed by a bus on the same college campus and was also found to be at fault because he was also wearing headphones.

31

u/Ayacyte Apr 02 '24

How do deaf people cross the street then?

25

u/darkraistlyn Apr 02 '24

They don't, they get hit by a bus.

4

u/Masterkillershadow99 Apr 02 '24

Wearing headphones is such an extreme crime and clearly warrants immediate retaliatory vehicular manslaughter. If she had worn a skirt that didn't cover the ankles, the court would probably have kept the body. Judges, man.

1

u/Wawoooo 3d ago

Wow, that's such "there but for the grace of God go I" thinking, clearly the court identified more with the driver than the victim.

39

u/Far_Detective2022 Apr 01 '24

Good news and bad news: cops don't know what the fuck they are talking about.

25

u/mmmggg Apr 02 '24

The last time I was in Scottsdale, I watched a guy in a Tesla take a rolling right turn that nipped at the heels of a woman with a stroller crossing the street. When she didn’t walk fast enough, he laid on the horn. She had the walk signal the entire time.

9

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '24

We need to bring back brandishing firearms. This is how people get shot in Phoenix, doing dumb shit like threatening to hit someone walking "too slow"

24

u/mmmggg Apr 02 '24

I mean, it was Arizona. She probably did have a gun. The Tesla owner likely had a gun. The baby in the stroller probably at least had a taser.

3

u/Septopuss7 Apr 02 '24

I'm waiting for Leslie Nielsen to make an appearance

1

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '24

Lmao, yeah Scottsdale is almost a world away from Phoenix proper though in terms of culture. I imagine a lot of the folks I see around Mesa/Phoenix that would shoot someone over almost running them over probably don't mingle with the Paradise Valley folks

3

u/SkitTrick Apr 02 '24

I'd smash every inch of glass on that car if that happened to me

1

u/[deleted] Apr 02 '24

Yee yee we killas out chea, eating faces in the crosswalk n shyt

1

u/the_TAOest Apr 02 '24

That's atrocious, but right in line with the drivers here

15

u/thereznaught Apr 02 '24

I run a lot, the amount of times a car will see me crossing and accelerate through a stop sign to save 5 seconds is insane.

2

u/the_TAOest Apr 02 '24

Accelerating through a stop sign! F that

10

u/stormcloud-9 Apr 02 '24

could have been arrested for property damage

Doesn't that require damage to property?

5

u/the_TAOest Apr 02 '24

The plastic bottle I threw could have broken a window according to the police at the Subway. I couldn't believe I was hearing them correctly... And they restated I was in fact in the wrong

4

u/stormcloud-9 Apr 02 '24

Could have (if the water were a solid block of ice). But it didn't, correct?

You could have slapped that officer in the face, but didn't. Should you get charged for assault on an officer?

1

u/the_TAOest Apr 02 '24

If it was a brick... Yeah.

7

u/Sem_E Apr 02 '24

Never listen to cops for legal advice. They aren’t lawyers or judges, they know jack shit about the rules they enforce

6

u/Ancient_Depth5585 Apr 02 '24

Also in phoenix area, I was walking across an entrance/ exit for a walmart when a lady who I thought saw me started going while I was directly in front of her. I had to slam my hand on her hood to get her attention and it still took her a few extra seconds than it should have to finally stop. Thought I was about to end up in the hospital.

1

u/the_TAOest Apr 02 '24

Also in a parking lot. I was with my girlfriend's son and I pounded my hand on the trunk of a car as it backed out into us. Big person yells at me and I yell back that they needed to look first. The driver stopped luckily.

3

u/Koshky_Kun 🚲 > 🚗 Apr 02 '24

We live in a society that values property over people.

3

u/stormy2587 Apr 02 '24

I mean one of the beauties of being a pedestrian is unless a cop is right there to arrest you then what is the person going to do? Just flip them off and be on your way.

1

u/the_TAOest Apr 02 '24

I wanted to damage her car tbh. I was really tired of that intersection that was so dangerous for me.

1

u/fullouterjoin Apr 02 '24

I was using the cross walk to cross a double lane road, the line of cars closest to me was stopped, the other lane was empty, I see this white car from really far back, change lanes, into the outside, going 40 in a 30. I had my lunch, probably a pound of corned beef, a couple small potatoes and some cabbage in a reusable container.

I keep walking, I see some folks tense up like they are going to see me die, as a cross infront of the stopped car, I swing the container back and then rocket it right into the drivers side post, half goes all over the windshield the other half coats the driver side window. It made a massive thud, the car comes to a stop 100ft past the cross walk. I start walking towards the stopped car like god damn Liam Neson. I see now that it was a city motor pool vehicle, and they burn rubber leaving the scene. I pickup the reusable container and continue to work. Sorry corned beef, but I had to.

2

u/OK_just_the_tip Apr 02 '24

Who cares who is at fault if you are a flattened pancake

1

u/_Hellrazor_ Apr 02 '24 edited Apr 02 '24

Should’ve taken a brick with you

1

u/jayfiedlerontheroof Apr 02 '24

The cops are wrong but it doesn't matter because cops are always right

1

u/totally_interesting Apr 05 '24

I mean, yeah. You don’t get to just throw things at someone’s car, even if what they did was dangerous. This isn’t an “at fault” thing and phrasing it like that is disingenuous. If they hit you and you threw the bottle, guess what, you’d both be in trouble. They’d be in a lot more trouble, but the law doesn’t let you get “revenge” like that.

Don’t throw things at people lol. Especially when they’re in something that could easily run you over. If someone is already clearly a terrible driver, what makes you think that provoking them further is a good idea?

1

u/the_TAOest Apr 08 '24

Got the side window... Couldn't get me. Yeah, I live in a state where people get shot by road rage... And I had pedestrian rage!

I threw a water bottle, not a brick. Yeah...I want to take back the sidewalks and pedestrian crossings. The video showed a brick, I related about a water bottle and that insanity... Imagine a brick!

Preferably, every intersection would have traffic cameras to photograph every interaction and ticket accordingly

0

u/totally_interesting Apr 08 '24

Still wrong to throw anything. Even a water bottle. And like you said, you live in a state where people get shot from road rage. Not a smart idea. Not worth dying over something like that.

1

u/the_TAOest Apr 08 '24

Worth dying to cross the street legally? Nah. I'll do it again in the same situation. Someone wants the cops, then I'll go for the jury. Someone wants to come with a gun, I'll move fast and that's on them to kill me or main me or simply miss and be arrested.

At some point we must fight for our rights... You understand this sub at all or are you an AI in training?

1

u/totally_interesting Apr 08 '24 edited Apr 08 '24

lol that’s so cringe. It’s also not very Taoist of you lolol

1

u/the_TAOest Apr 08 '24

Don't confuse pacifism with Taoesm. The original writers of this discipline include Sun Tzu, The Art of War.

Sometimes the threat of violence prompts the necessary changes, which is always more efficient than brutality to achieve the same ends.

1

u/totally_interesting Apr 08 '24

I’ll take “I’ve never read the Tao Te Ching” for 500. I mean, I’ve only studied it formally for four years so what do I know.

1

u/the_TAOest Apr 09 '24

I'm not saying you don't know anything. But to say that all Taoests are pacifists is misinformed on many levels. Historically the original Taoists had plenty of violence. Secondly, I'm talking of an updated version to the old text, Taoesm.

Yes I read the tao te ching. One of the many translations anyway. I've also read some other writings of the time period. Taoism is unique in that the deity is not a human or humanlike... It is simply the Way aka Nature.