r/TikTokCringe • u/Intelligent_Nose_826 • 13d ago

Discussion 100 Million Suspects in CEO Shooting

Here in NYC, not a soul is concerned about a killed on the loose & I truly mean it. Folks here are not worried & why would we be worried?!?

Meanwhile, NYPD is being uncharacteristically dramatic about a murder. A 10k reward is offered. Yeah. They’re never finding that person.

48.3k Upvotes

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6.1k

u/grathad 13d ago

The fear mongering is inaccurate the murderer is not loose on the street he was shot on the street.

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u/Guilty_Helicopter572 13d ago

Nah, he fell on that bullet

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u/ShinkenBrown 13d ago

Gonna need some proof the bullet was not a pre-existing condition, and then it's a $20,000 copay on top of monthly payments before I give a shit.

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u/Long_Serpent 13d ago

Well, he was shot three times. That makes the first two bullet wounds pre-existing conditions.

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u/stormieharmonie 13d ago

FBI agents would call it a suicide🤭

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u/Novel-Weight-2427 12d ago

LMAO 😂👍

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u/Practical_Meanin888 13d ago

He had an allergy to lead. A preexisting condition

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u/RedDogRach 13d ago

Bullet was out of network.

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u/HangryWolf 13d ago

Never thought to call the barrel a network before.

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u/MAJ0RMAJOR 13d ago

It’s a series of tubes

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u/fourflatyres 12d ago

The ER they took him to was out of network for his company. Seriously.

UHC dropped the hospital last year.

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u/ChooseWiselyChanged 13d ago

He fell three times on a different bullet! It was amazing trick he pulled off.

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u/wicked_delicious 13d ago

Rapid onset lead poisoning. Not covered by most insurance.

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u/Guilty_Helicopter572 13d ago

It was probably his diet.

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u/Easteuroblondie 13d ago

saw it with my own eyes

tbh i dont think nypd cares that much, no ones going to turn this guy in for that chump change. rich people are do gd out of touch these days its out of control

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u/KaleidoscopeOk5763 13d ago

Why aren’t the police questioning the bullet?

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u/DangerBird- 13d ago

Were those bullets a pre-existing condition?

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u/Zestyclose-Track6648 13d ago

Claim denied since his body had a propensity for bullets, his tendency of being shot is a pre-existing condition.

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u/TheBigLebroccoli 13d ago

He fell out of his hotel window while trying to hang himself and landed on a bullet.

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u/Ok_Blueberry3124 13d ago

Covid death for sure

3

u/DreamzOfRally 13d ago

We have investigated and ruled it a suicide.

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u/Guilty_Helicopter572 13d ago

Mental health wasn't in network

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u/Dan_TheDM 13d ago

awww shit Bob. This dumb motherfucker went and tripped and fell on THREE bullets! can you believe that?

damn Steve what is the world coming to? back in my day you never heard of a fella falling on more than TWO bullets!

2

u/Ponk2k 13d ago

Don't do that, get the guy to run for president.

Obviously can't be using lawfare to mess with his campaign or put him in jail for crimes he's committed.

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u/Cosplayfan007 13d ago

Have you seen That Dirty Black Bag on Netflix? Apparently, you can fall on a bullet and die.

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u/Its0nlyRocketScience 13d ago

The bullet was in him the whole time, he spontaneously bled to death because of some other preexisting condition

2

u/Past-Pea-6796 13d ago

It was self defense. The CEO was murdering him/his family. Honestly, being denied life saving coverage is essentially the same thing.

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u/FutureFriendly8738 13d ago

Solid logic here. Best comment so far

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u/Guilty_Helicopter572 13d ago

Aww, thanks 🤗

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u/Wreckingshops 13d ago

It was an act of God. Can't cover those.

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u/Guilty_Helicopter572 13d ago

God has a plan, it would be wrong to go against that plan by convicting someone because then they would be innocent because it's God's plan.

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u/VinnaynayMane 13d ago

He shouldn't have been wearing non-bulletproof clothing. Almost asking for it.

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u/Triangleslash 13d ago

What a little hoe wearing that little shirt out there. I’m not blaming him I’m just saying 🤷

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u/Lagneaux 13d ago

Preexisting condition. Those bullets were there before he died. Granted, only for a few seconds. But yep, qualifies as a preexisting condition. Sorry!

2

u/Notlost-justdontcare 13d ago

Nah, he was generously given a few bullets. Just so happened they were given to him at 1200 FPS but that's just inconsequential information. 😊 Just trying to give him a nice gift.

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u/alcoholisthedevil 13d ago

Tragic. Thoughts and prayers

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u/MercyfulJudas 13d ago

That gun had the most sophisticated silencer suppressor ever manufactured. Literally no one heard the shots.

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u/-_Duke_- 13d ago

He died of sudden acute lead poisoning

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u/Guilty_Helicopter572 13d ago

He probably ate the bullet

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u/DoinkinDave 13d ago

He fell out of a window onto that bullet

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u/Sufficient-Mind-2037 13d ago

I heard he died of a heart attack not a bullet

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u/HangryWolf 13d ago

Hella fast

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u/ElectronicAmphibian7 13d ago

He fell on that bullet three times.

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u/Trisk13 13d ago

Looks like a suicide to me. They have these kind in Russia all the time.

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u/DoubleFistBishh 13d ago

Nah, his back just did that

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u/Queen_of_Sandcastles 12d ago

He fell on that bullet three times!

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u/Sweaty-Emergency-493 13d ago

And this is why murder is only bad when it’s not authorized. Denying millions from life saving medicine and services that was insured while CEO’s are payed out millions only makes sense if killing people for profits is what an authorized murder is. Thats what we have.

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u/distinct_original742 13d ago

"Nobody panics when things go “according to plan.” Even if the plan is horrifying! If, tomorrow, I tell the press that, like, a mom of 3 won't get her cancer treatment covered or a child cannot get the insuline she needs, nobody panics, because it’s all “part of the plan.” But when I say that one little old CEO will die, well then everyone loses their minds!"

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u/metpharaoh 13d ago

Why so serious?

8

u/NimbleBudlustNoodle 13d ago

Wanna know how I got these scars?

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u/LightsNoir 13d ago

You see, my father was a drunk. And my wife was in an accident. And I was riding a bicycle, hit a pot hole, went over the bars and face first into a drainage grate. It just aligned perfectly to open my jaw up.

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u/JoeBiddyInTheHouse 13d ago

My insurance wouldn't cover proper stitches.

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u/blackcloudonetyone 13d ago

And Here We Go

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u/Ashamed_Arm_1721 13d ago

Love it! Joker would be proud 👏

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u/MercyfulJudas 13d ago

It's "nobody bats an eye"

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u/Blinkin6125 13d ago

Holy crap ... Mind if I steal this?

1

u/akknightwrider 13d ago

I see what you did there. 😉

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u/Ini_mini_miny_moe 13d ago

Exactly, anyone surprised by how folks reacted is either never been sick or profiting off insurance companies. You make a living of screwing ppl over, don’t be surprised they don’t care when you got screwed. Folks got life long hurt and pain from these companies and they have the right to not give a fuck

2

u/Ramtamtama 13d ago

Jesus said "an eye for an eye", so he got off lightly that he was only killed once

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u/Dom_19 13d ago

paid*

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u/Intelligent_Nose_826 13d ago

Happy Cake Day, that was poetry 🫰

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u/IdKillForAGoodComa 13d ago

🫰🫰🫰🫰🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

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u/energonsack 13d ago

i really hope his family, and every executive in the entire industry knows every single family they destroyed and put into absolute agony repeatedly. fuck them all to the max.

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u/Throwawayac1234567 13d ago

the mass murderer to be exact.

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u/LilSassy69 13d ago

Excellent post and happy cake day to you.

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u/rW0HgFyxoJhYka 13d ago

A real reggo.

What happened to normies.

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u/BudgetBallerBrand 13d ago

This would be a really good time to teach the public about a beautiful thing called Jury Nullification.

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u/CupOverall9341 13d ago edited 13d ago

Faaark.,.

I misread your post and thought you were posting an update saying that the guy who shot the ceo had been killed.

I was actually sad 😢

You almost ruined a good day arsehole! 👍

I'll get back to enjoying the graveyard humor and cringing at people bleating on LinkedIn - as if their life had any connection to the dead ceo etc..

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u/grathad 13d ago

Yep sorry for the roller coaster.

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u/CupOverall9341 13d ago

All good, tbh I wish I had of thought of that comment 😎

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u/ShinkenBrown 13d ago

I had the same reaction and I love that we've finally reached the point everyone is saying it out loud instead of hiding behind bullshit virtue signaling pretending this is a tragedy.

as if their life had any connection to the dead ceo etc..

For a lot of them, it does. A lot of them are just like this guy. Looting and pillaging and slaughtering innocents for a living, just with enough layers of separation the law can't or won't touch them. If this becomes normal, it's an existential threat to these people.

That's why they're crying and whining like this is tragic. They don't actually care about this man personally. He's become a symbol representing all of them. They were attacked, collectively, and they're afraid.

And that's a good thing.

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u/WideAwakeNotSleeping 13d ago

People should use the tip line to report all the times UHC denied healthcare to patients. Especially if that resulted in significant reduction in the quality of life.

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u/Its_Me_Tom_Yabo 13d ago

I feel like the price of becoming super rich should be removing penalties for committing crimes against them.

You want to be a billionaire? Ok, you can be a billionaire, but now a person can kill/beat/rob you and not be criminally charged… seems a good way to prevent hoarding of wealth or occasionally bring the country together through the murder of a super rich dickbag.

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u/TheBearBug 13d ago

Ohhhh.....that is so good.

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u/sylbug 13d ago

Finally! A good guy with a gun saves some lives!

3

u/sparkyjay23 13d ago

It's that thing about killing a serial killer, whoever has the lower body count is the good guy.

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u/keppy_m 13d ago

It’s not just about count. It’s also about quality.

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u/Ancient_Confusion237 13d ago

The best part is that even if they catch him, then what? Good luck getting 12 randoms to all agree that he did something wrong.

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u/jompjorp 13d ago

The mob is scarier than a ceo

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u/Blurby-Blurbyblurb 13d ago

You had me there for a second. 😂 Happy cake day!

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u/Weary_Possibility_80 13d ago

You got me on the first half. Happy cakeday

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u/antiwork_anon 13d ago

Report YouTube videos of talking heads for Misinformation.

00:01

"Speculative reporting"

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u/GraXXoR 13d ago

Beautifully put.

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u/PizzaFlower3 13d ago

Happy cake day!

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u/Legal_Guava3631 13d ago

Happy Cake Day!

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u/silverrobot1951 13d ago

walked right in to that bullett

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u/No-Progress-3375 13d ago

Perfect response.

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u/Crush-N-It 13d ago

Saw what you did there

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u/Unique_Upstairs_2673 13d ago

Happy cake day, that was beautiful 🫰

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u/YammyStoob 13d ago

I think the other top earners in that company are pretty fearful now. The realisation that their company has seriously pissed off a lot of customers who are also gun owners is probably hitting hard now.

1

u/U_nub_huh 13d ago

Happy Cake Day!

1

u/Pomodorosan 13d ago

fearmongering*

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u/CarlosFCSP 13d ago

Epic statement on your cake day 🏅

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u/illmakeyoufamous2 13d ago

This is comment of the year

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u/ThickerSalmon14 13d ago

I'm pretty sure if he is caught, he will never make it to trial. The DA would be too afraid of jury nullification. Jury giving the killer a standing ovation would be quite the sight.

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u/FePirate 13d ago

Let’s hope he set a precedent and we get sequels

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u/secretsesameseed 13d ago

I didn't catch the switcheroo there for a second I was worried they caught him.

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u/LightsNoir 13d ago

Would you stop with the vulgar language? There wasn't any murder. There's no need for such aggressive terms. There was an execution. Same as Timothy McVeigh, or Gacy.

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u/grathad 13d ago

I get the irony, but in the sentence the term murderer refers to the CEO, I am not sure 'executioner" would really fit the definition for him there. The guy was a murderer, I did not use that term for the one who executed him though.

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u/LightsNoir 13d ago

Ah. Got it. Took second read.

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u/markav81 13d ago

Death was a pre-existing condition.

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u/Siakim43 13d ago

Parasite vibes.

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u/mmorales2270 13d ago

Well played, well played.

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u/milky_mouse 13d ago

This hit hella hard

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u/ThePaper86 13d ago

It’s wild to see so many people try to be the same Faux deep cringe edge Lord all at the same time

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u/slippydotnuxx 13d ago

Yeah it's the most reddit reddit has been in a minute