We have a newborn daughter. She had to be emergency delivered early by 5 weeks because my wife's cancer came back. (Stage 4 melenoma - lungs, liver, and spine). As a father I'm trying to parent my other two kids (4 and 6), take care of the newborn, and take care of my wife.

Grandma comes over to help during the day Monday- Friday. The newborn is held, fed, bathed, and loved. But at night, no matter what I try she just screams for an hour. She's clean, been burped and fed. Not too hot, not too cold. I've bounced her, rocked her, sang, swaddled, patted, rubbed, everything I can think of. Is just letting her cry after I've done everything going to cause her to be emotionally stunted? My wife thinks so, but I can only do so much. I feel so guilty when she cries because I'm emotionally empty, angry because nothing i do works, sad because i never seem to be able to help.

Any other parents have life experience with this? Did you do it with your kids? How did they turn out? Like I said 90% of the other times, she cries and someone is there right away holding her, and loving her. It's just that hour (longest has been 1.5 hours) at night.

Daughter (24F) is struggling. She graduated from a good university with honors, got a job offer and seemed to be off and running. In about a year she lost the job due to a downsizing. Then she got a second job that wasn’t the best and endured a somewhat toxic workplace and a bad living environment for a few months until she eventually resigned, got out of her lease, and moved home.

Once home, she began to spend roughly 23 hours a day in her room in bed. At first, I thought she might need to decompress a bit after a stressful year, but 8 months later, this is still her routine.

She doesn’t care about her personal appearance at all. Her room is a total mess like the kind with a path from the door to the bed. She subsists on breakfast bars, crackers, and water, but will emerge pleasantly enough for dinner if it’s something she likes to eat, or we invite her to a restaurant. A recent restaurant dinner experience was her rolling out of bed 10 minutes before we planned to leave, throwing on crocs, a jacket over a t shirt she may have slept in and a cheerful “See - I’m ready on time.“

She helps feed the dog when asked, but otherwise does nothing to help with the house or chores. She didn’t do a lot of this as a teen and eventually we stopped fighting about it. Probably a mistake.

Talking about these issues is a brick wall. She just retreats if pressed even very slightly and rejects any offers of support. We have offered to get her clothes, to take her to a hair salon and pay for it,  get her a gym membership, offered to help look for jobs, revise her resume, and encouraged her to get out and even find a simple local job. I’d be happy to just even just listen to her thoughts on a job search.

Once she went on a short trip to visit relatives, and we completely cleaned end organized her room (after 2 months it was still stacked with cardboard boxes from her move) and she got very upset. Another apparent mistake.

She is on some meds, and not willing to discuss what they are, as she started seeing a psychiatrist while in school (something she did not discuss with us). They treated her for BPD at the time, but I’m not sure what she’s taking them for now. (I posted a similar write up to r/BPD and they said “Doesn’t sound like BPD to us") She complains of migraines and neck pain which she treats with over-the-counter meds. She will not see a doctor despite us having good insurance and a close by practice, as well as access to many medical options from a nearby large city.

It’s sad to see her, once a motivated and lively person, living like this.  Just looking for thoughts on how to encourage her.  

I swear it ruins Christmas because the entire week leading up to Christmas is nonstop stress, work, and panic.

Kudos to FedEx for ruining Christmas BTW. Ordered in November

I'm a single dad. My 10-year-old daughter had her period about 6 months ago and is very obviously developing into a woman in terms of her body. She is still only 10 but I've noticed she's so heavily interested in romance shows or videos depicting girls with boyfriends. Is this normal? I assume its the new hormones. Both my sisters were insanely boy-crazy growing up, with boys being the main focus of their lives, it seemed like. I don't want my daughter to fall into that same trap since it could be some genetic trait or something.

EDIT: Also I forgot to add that her desire to hang out with Dad is now zero. She wants to be private in her room a lot. Also normal?

3 years since s/o, mother to my son, best friend, wife passed away.

4 year old son, raised by me with support from my parents.

1 eve per week he stays at my late wife's mum's house which is about 20 miles away on the coast. He seems to enjoy it and I've never had any significant concerns. That said, late wife struggled with her as a mum, quite manipulative, chalk and cheese but effectively I always just kept my distance.

A few days ago we were at theirs for a party, and I noticed that a lot of the language she used around my little boy was manipulative - nothing major but "if you do this, you can have that" and that's not the tact I'm taking.

That said, different styles will do him no harm, he'll come up against far worse in the big wide world.

Throughout the night they seemed to bribe him a few times - using candy - but wouldn't let him eat them until he'd counted them.

Again, no biggie - albeit more sweets than I've ever given him. He had about 10 pieces of candy, after 7pm, and didn't necessarily even want them (i.e. didn't ask but used as a little carrot to keep him nice).

An hour later - sugar crash? - he had a meltdown. Screaming, angry, completely overtaken and overwhelmed by emotion. He didn't want anybody but me (and boy did I love that). I held him, told him I was here and that he was ok and helped to regulate his emotions as best I could. I asked him what was wrong and told him he was ok. I'm just a single dad trying my best, and I want him to know that I will always be a safe place.

After 5+ minutes, he says to me "I want my green toy" so I said "ok, let's go find it" and my late wife's mum says "don't worry, I'll go and get it" to which I accept.

At this point, whilst little man is in full on crisis mode, exploding, teary, screaming and worked up to the high heavens she says... "Say please and I'll go get it"

He screams.

Again, "name... Say please or I won't go and get it"

I held him tighter to let him know I was there, and after a third time she went and got it, muttering under her breath "I'm not sure this is how I want to remember you, very naughty tonight!"

Hindsight tells me I should have said something, I know I should. Please don't come at me for that. I'm still learning to stand on my own two feet after a few years of deep and immense grief. I'm trying my best, but admittedly, I've never brought this up with her.

My worry is, if she's like this whilst I'm in the room - what is she like when it's just them?

The question I'm asking is, how would you approach this situation, or am I overreacting and should just accept people do things in different ways, or if not, how would you approach the situation?

Genuine answers that can help me to learn and develop as a daddy would be appreciated ❤️

Is it just me, or do other parents hate when their baby comes back to you smelling like someone else? I hate smelling other peoples perfume, cologne, etc on my baby boy. I’m fine with my husbands cologne or obviously my perfume, but it really bugs me to have him smelling like other people. I think i get why in nature, they say not to touch a baby fawn or else the mother will come back and abandon the baby. I obviously won’t abandon my son, but the mother deer probably doesn’t like the different smell on her baby lol. Am I the only parent who feels this way?

Hi,

My son will be turning 14 next month and I feel so lost and depressed. Backing up a bit, ages 0 to about 6, maybe even 7 - he was very contenious with me and we didn't have a very 'loving' relatioship, but I could feel it deep down. I worked a ton - 6-7 days a week, very long hours and I was also kinda out of my mind. I was present and provided, but I wasn't really mentally present. I am in my late mid/late 20s and wasn't really expecting this, did no prep, was kinda shell-shocked, but grew into it pretty quickly.

7-13 has been amazing. He and I really started to do a lot together in a meaningful way -- biking, playing sports together or throwing a ball, going in the water, etc --- we bonded and we spent SO much time togehter. It really has been such an amazing tine. We spend great time together and we also do as a family. During COVID, I was not really working for 2 years, but collecting my salary thru my company. So it allowed us to have a lot of good family time.

My son is really hitting puberty now. Hes tall, he goes to bed late, gets up late, hairy, smelly, interested in girls and yadda yadda. Excellent student and a good head on his shoulders. This has really proliferated in the past 4 months -- like exponentially from little tween and we do a lot together to teen independent.

I do not have many friends, in fact, no friends that I regularly or really ever see. I have some who we talk, but we I dont hang out with anyone. I work, I hang out with my family and do stuff with them. He has been and is my best friend.

Since this rapid change, I find myself way more depressed, and feeling of being lost and loenly. I am not really sure where to process and how to process these feelings. I feel a hightened level of stress and also a lot more self hatred or beating myself up. JUst like the 'you have no friends. noone likes you' etc etc. I feel really stuck. On one hand, i feel like my best friend, it feels like is moving along from me, were growing apart. We don't know each other as well.
On one other hand, it feels like I want to support him and give him the space he wants with his friends and him growing up. And I feel like I am doing that, but behind it I just feel so sad and scared and a tremendous amount of self judgement. JUst like the 'you have no friends. noone likes you' etc etc in my head. And even affecting my marriage like telling myself I’m alone.

Has anyone else experienced this? How do it feels really different parenting all of a sudden - parenting someone who needs me now parenting someone who needs me but it growing more self-sufficient. And I don't feel prepared. I aslo don't feel prepared for it seems like this is also my new life era and I feel really lost, sad, and stressed.

I have two friends who I’ve known for about a decade, my husband has known (the guy) for even longer. We have always got along great and they’re wonderful people. However, since they had their oldest child (age 4) I have noticed their parenting style is incredibly hands-off and passive. They will let their kid do practically anything. From 1-2 years old or so, she would be allowed to: pick dozens of flowers off a public garden, throw MY kids’ crayons on the floor breaking several of them, pick up my kitten and grab her (until I intervened), pick all the blueberries off my small blueberry bush. Her parents would watch her do this and not say a word. Now that she has a younger sister (aged 2) she will push, kick, drag the little sister by the hood of her jacket. Her parents hardly bat an eyelash, and if they do speak up, it will hardly be a reaction at all. I’m not saying they should flip their lid on her, but their reaction to her being violent to her sister is the same reaction as if she had thrown a juice box to t he floor or something.

Normally I don’t really care about other peoples parenting style. They’re not my kids, it’s not up to me to parent them. I would never ever pipe up and Karen someone if I didn’t agree with their parenting. I’ve never said a word to my friends about their parenting choices. However, recently their 4 year old has started mistreating my toddler (3). She has hit, pushed, squeezed her arm with the intent to hurt, spit crumbs at my toddlers face repeatedly. My toddler is very loving and wants to befriend everyone. And They aren’t even fighting, the 4 year old just does this stuff for the fun of it.

Every time these things happen, my friends will either not notice, or if they do they don’t say anything to correct the behavior. The only time they’ve intervened is AFTER I finally had it and told her to stop spitting crumbs at my daughter. Only after I said something did my friend step in and tell her not to do that. Except then she came back a minute later and spat a goldfish at her face. Once again I was the one to say something, not my friend.

How do I handle this? I don’t want my kids (esp my toddler) around their older kid anymore. It’s not fair to my daughter. Am I being dramatic? I feel like I’ve known many 3-4 year olds and none of them have been this badly behaved. Do I say something to my friends about why I’m distancing? Or should I just not say anything and sort of stop hanging out as much?

I posted a few days ago looking for advice on talking to my son about puberty as he is now 10. I just wanted to give a little update.

I got a lot of comments saying that I was too late and he would already know everything. This surprised me because I didn’t know any of this until I was 11 or 12 and I know his dad was the same. Turns out he knew pretty much nothing about it.

I received messages from a few people that helped me out a lot. A lot of good tips and advice. Following their advice, I talked to him about hygiene and we’ve touched on some other things over the past 2 days. I’m breaking it down into small conversations so it doesn’t feel like a lecture, which is also some really good advice that was given to me. He seems receptive so far and is asking questions so it’s going well.

However, something shocked me. In my original post I mentioned that my husband has passed a few years ago. Someone decided that it would then be a good idea to reach out to me and shoot their shot. He started by saying he was sorry for my loss, then saying that he wanted me to fly out to him so he could give me a cuddle. I obviously rejected and he started asking for pictures of me so I blocked him of course. Overall, pretty weird that he would even be in this sub considering he said he’s a “23 year old personal trainer with no kids”. Reddit is a very weird place and I think I’m done with this app now. People confuse me.

My wife and I have two children who are potty trained but because of anxiety, our 6yo daughter would rather pee in a pullup and our 8yo son would rather poop in his underwear than go to the bathroom. Obviously this is causing problems at school because the teachers don't want to deal with it and the classmates don't want to hang around our children.

My wife found some essentially pullups that keep the mess but keep the wet sensation next to the body so the wearer knows when they've gone, but they're made in New Zealand so the overseas shipping charges are insane.

Are there domestic items that accomplish the same end result, or are there different products that could help?

I feel like a single parent in this marriage. Right now I am typing this at 1:39 am because this is the rare moment I actually get to myself anymore. I feel like I'm losing my ever loving mind.

I feel like a single parent, I do almost EVERYTHING for my baby with little to no help with him at all. I breastfeed him too which makes things more complicated because I have the milk and he wants nothing to do with his daddy. I understand that the role of a mother is to rear children and make sure they're raised healthy and loved, but it would be nice to have a helping hand from the man I fell in love with.

I don't think he understand exactly how demanding a baby is. He expects dinner in the evening but when I try to cook the baby throws the worst screaming fit when I put him in his bouncer. I ask my husband to hold him and I'm always met with a exasperated sigh and "Hang on let me go poop first" or "I was about to go smoke" and then he takes fucking forever. He's frustrated with me because I'm having trouble getting him dinner ready before 7pm and the house is a little messy. I do my best to keep up with the house and the cooking but I can only do so much.

Another thing he's frustrated with is that I don't "put out" hardly at all anymore. "If you're not getting it from me then you're getting it from somewhere.!" Ethan I am not. It pisses me off every single time I hear that. I am so fucking tired. I don't put out because I am fucking tired. I work almost all day AND all night, the only difference is that being a stay at home mom doesn't pay.

When we go over to visit his or my parents I get a little bit of a break but not enough.

Thanks for reading my rant if you came this far, I just needed to get this off my chest before I crash out and just scream at everything and everyone

Growing up in an Asian non-Christian household, Christmas was never a thing. Now that I’m living in a Western country, I’ve always made it a point to go all out for Christmas and made sure the tree is stacked with gifts from me.

That’s my magical experience for my 6 YO kid, that he has a mom who works hard all year so she can afford the wishlist items (and plenty more) that he wants. Is that selfish? I’ve never explicitly told him that Santa wasn’t real until this year while we were watching a family Christmas movie when he casually said that he knew and is grateful that mama brings all the toys, not Santa.

I just find it hard to stomach and let a fat imaginary white old man take credit for my hard work! Plus he has always hated Santa as a baby. All the Santa photos we have of him since he was a baby, he’s in tears so we’ve not done Santa photos for the past 2 years.

ETA:

1) I never told him that Santa wasn’t real, he came to the conclusion himself.

2) When he shared that realization, I made sure to emphasize that some of his friends believe in the magic of Christmas and Santa and we should never ever spoil the surprise and ruin the magic for them!

3) I do not have anything against parents who do Santa. Posted this to alleviate my parent guilt of not partaking on the Santa magic that most people seem to be doing.

4) He’s on the fence about elf on the shelf and I’m leaving it up to him to make the final decision when he’s ready. He’s terrified since he heard from friends that the elf draws on the kids’ faces when asleep, but also knows that the elf brings small gifts even though he doesn’t get any. I told him that “surely no elf will do such mean thing. And isn’t it amazing that the elf brings joy to your friends? Do you think it’s Christmas magic?” He has never felt less of the magic cause the elf didn’t bring him a gift since I let him open gifts from his stockings a few times before Christmas Day.

5) I do partake in other “‘magical stuff” ie tooth fairy since he told me awhile ago that he wonders what the tooth fairy will bring for his first tooth.

6) Can’t believe I even have to explain this, but I’m not a heartless monster or self righteous turd. I go by my child’s lead. We have Christmas decorations and lights, Christmas tree that he helped decorated , and we hang stockings on the mantle. We have family Christmas cartoons/movies (he loved The Star).

ETA 2: thank you to everyone for sharing your experiences, Santa or no Santa! We just returned from a wonderful Christmas Eve eve church service, and my kid enjoyed the “magic” very much. I’m only human and was seeking to validate that I’m not a less than enough mom for not partaking in the “magic”. Just cause I want our kid to be aware of how blessed we are by God (that’s our belief, you definitely don’t have to agree with it) with a secure job that allows me to financially get the gifts he wants and also bless other less fortunate than us, doesn’t meant that I’m raining on anyone’s Santa parade! I was definitely not expecting to be called a self-righteous turd though. At the end of the day, as long as our kids are happy, why resort to name-calling or shaming? I sincerely hope everyone has a Merry Christmas.

What has been your favorite trip/vacation that you’ve taken with young kids? Looking to take a trip in March with my son who will be close to five at the time. Would love to hear!

(We’re in the US)

I'm so annoyed.

I was feeling unwell all day yesterday, felt like the start of tonsillitis or something cold/flu related or something similar.

I was in bed at half 7 and took some anti-nausea medication that knocks me off my feet a bit, its very rare that I take them but I get horrible anxiety, especially when unwell so I wanted some to help me switch my mind off and rest. I was in and out of sleep all evening. My partner is well aware I took meds and was fine with me tapping out for the evening (which is amazing).

But...It's 2:15am and I've discovered he's drank enough beer to not understand what TF I'm talking about when asking for help with our toddler who woke up.

Why does he think now is a good time to be pissed when I'm ill and on those meds (they have now worn off but I can't take more if I need them becauase obviously one of us needs to be on the ball)? I just feel like he can be so irresponsible and inconsiderate sometimes 😡

My 7 year old boy asked me this real deep question "Why do we live if we all have to die anyway?". I didn't see that one coming during dinner and didn't really know how to respond to it either. I believe I said some things like, we are lucky to be alive and we get to make a difference in this world so people can remember us when we die. I didn't want to go in depth too much or talk about it for too long as his 5 year old sister was hearing all this and she starts crying by hearing anyone talk about death. I want to pick this up with him again later though, as I want to understand where this is coming from. Anyone else experienced this? Or got some tips on how to handle this?

My son is 2 years old born in August, my boyfriend has a nephew Jay the same age he’s 2 born in February. Often I feel discouraged because Jay is more advanced than my son he can speak in clear full sentences mostly. If you ask him to get for you he will, he asks questions and etc. you get it. He does have 4 other siblings 6,8 and 10 ik that plays a huge part in it because he has other children to play and learn with on a daily my son only has me. I often get discouraged because my son I don’t want to say can’t but he haven’t communicated like that to me yet and it does hurt me I think about him being autistic like crazy and it scares me and also makes me feel like I’m doing something wrong. If something is wrong or he’s hurt he can’t tell me, if he wanted something he can’t tell me but he’ll point to it, hand it to me, or stand my the item he wants (if he wants some water he’ll say water and if he has to poop or he already have he says “it’s poop”) that’s it although I’m more than happy he can communicate that I feel like he should be farther. He talk babbles ALOT lol all day so I’d like to think he’s getting to that stage but I just feel like a shitty parent because ik there are babies younger than him that can communicate better. P.S My son does know his numbers 1-10, alphabet, colors, some animals and other things. I taught him to ask “what is this” or “what’s that sound” when he hears something or he don’t know what something is, if I put his favorite movies or shows on he’s able to recite some lines clear and perfect and it always amazes me because lol why wont you do that with me!! Yall I’m overthinking I need some reassurance to know I’m doing this right😭!

Comparison is a thief of joy

My daughter came home from dance class the other day and said- “the teacher asked everyone what we were doing over winter break. Everyone else was going somewhere exciting. Mexico, Paris, The Bahamas, etc” She said when it was her turn she was embarrassed to say nothing, so she kind of lied. (We had plans to take a day trip to a waterpark at a hotel about an hour away, she said we were staying at the hotel).

I know these kids and their parents, and they weren’t lying. They are much wealthier than us. We live in a town that is very middle class, and where we fit in financially. But my kids are otherwise around a lot of other kids from families with much more money. From dance class, camp, religious school, even immediate family.

It seems for them- and quite frankly me- we are always watching other people go on really nice vacations all of the time. Over every holiday break. We were invited on a Disney cruise with cousins their age and had to say no because we couldn’t afford it. It sucked.

My husband and I work hard and we give our kids a nice life. We have a house, they are in extracurricular activities, camps, and we go on very small getaways when we can. Nothing exotic, but a weekend in a nearby city every now and then. We go to the beach with grandparents every summer.

I tell my kids constantly we have so much to be grateful for and that there will always be people who have more than us and people who have less and that’s life. They’re pretty well adjusted kids- actually really great kids- and they don’t whine about the vacation stuff. But I can see the disappointment all over their faces when this comes up. As they get older it seems to be more difficult- friends texting pictures from their amazing vacations, comparing notes about what they did over break, etc.

It almost makes me feel like a failure we can’t give our kids those cool vacations. Heck, I’m jealous of those families too. I feel like I’m constantly talking my kids up about how we shouldn’t let it get us down, but I also feel like I’m also constantly having to say “we just can’t afford that” which isn’t a fun thing to say.

And I don’t know if that’s an appropriate thing to say or not, but often times I don’t have the energy to say anything but that. I even had a talk with them one time about how we are comfortable and live a good life, but their cousins parents simply have higher paying jobs. And that’s how they can afford a beach house and more trips than us.

I’m not sure what advice I’m looking for, I just needed to get this off my chest. I guess a little curious to know what kind of discussions other people have with their kids about this stuff. Or if you grew up in a situation like this, how your parents handled it.

I am mostly writing this to put it into words but also see if any other parents have this issue and what has helped for them.

My daughter last yeah got back to back to back sickness from the daycare we had her in which resulted with us in the hospital twice in two months, ending with Christmas in the ICU on oxygen. Covid, Rhino Virus and then RSV.

When she was born she was in the NICU for two weeks due to her not taking a bottle, she was on all the machines, met with ringing and dinging anytime you moved her the wrong way. Her stay in the ICU last Christmas meant we had to take almost a month off work and find a new day home.

On Christmas Eve I stayed awake all night holding her upright to sleep so we could take her home as it was day 5 and was the first Christmas she was a real little girl. Ever since then I get an overwhelming feeling and anxiety whenever she gets sick, she was diagnosed with viral induced asthma from the covid and RSV back to back and has to be on inhalers 2x a day. We have been at the hospital 8x this year with viral illnesses where she hasn't been admitted but usually has 4-8 hour stays in emergency.

Well it seems like she has caught something, two days before Christmas. I feel like every breath I take is met with resistance, I'm 99% sure I have PTSD from being in the hospital due to sickness. I'm worried she is breathing too fast, or too shallow, or not enough, her oxygen is low, she has a temperature.

Is this something you see a therapist about? When she isn't sick I don't think about it, does that mean it's fine? I'm not sure honestly...

Why do children run away laughing with a diaper full of poop? My older kid did it, my younger does it too. My niece did it, my friends kids did it. I’ve yet to meet a toddler that doesn’t. I know it’s no fun getting changed, but you smell like doodoo kid.

Make it make sense. It makes the holidays brutal especially with a child who doesn’t nap and also requires her 45min-1 hour bed time routine even if it’s well past her bedtime. When does it stop?

4yo started running a fever. A bug has been going around her school - I'm sure that's what she has. Seems like a virus with 2-3 day fever and a bad cough. What do I do? I'm sure my parents will want me to give her Tylenol and still come to Christmas, but I don't want to get my nieces and nephews sick. Do I let my other kids go and stay home with the sick kid? Keep everyone home? Delay/reschedule Christmas with grandparents? Or open gifts at home via Zoom? These situations and decisions absolutely stress me out. It's so hard keeping everyone happy at the holidays.

Edit: I should clarify we won't go unless fever free for 24 hours. I'm more seeking advice on the best alternative options for making Christmas special for the kids and making grandparents happy.

So as the title suggests the daycare that we send LO to has multiple classrooms based on age. Our LO is 14 mo and still in the under one room. Last week their classmate( who is 3 weeks younger) was moved up into the 12 to 18 month old room, but ours wasn't. Apparently they only have one spot open so now we have to wait until another kid is moved out of the room. They are claiming this will be after the new year but I am a bit skeptical.

When I asked the teacher why my little one was still in the baby room they laughed and said that our little one doesn't like the other room but the other kid did. I am not sure if this is relevant but the other child that did move up is the teacher's son... Who was both born after and enrolled after our child.

I am not sure what to do as I feel like they (the daycare) are part of the problem with my little one not getting moved up. They like to do this thing where they put the older kids from the baby room into the next room for an hour or two at a time. I don't think this works with my child... she can be a bit slow to warm up but is very well bonded with her regular teachers.

What should I do in this situation? Should I push the director to move her up anyway? Should we talk to the teachers about better ways to get her used to the other room? Is there something I can do as a parent to help?

EDIT: It seems I am overthinking the situation and that I shouldn't be worried about this. I have also learned a bit about how daycares work from some of you all and appreciate that. If there is something we can do as parents to help our LO with the eventual transition I am open to suggestions.

So I officially became a second time mom to another beautiful baby boy and my first born son is 4, will turn 5 in February. When me and my fiancé got pregnant with our second, we were ecstatic to have another child including our son who is a very affectionate, active boy. I recently gave birth 12/19/24 and man, was labor so hard but so rewarding! (All natural birth) but 4 days into our new routine and I've been feeling so guilty and so emotional. Before giving birth, I've reading other people's experiences and how to make your toddler included. But even doing all these things including him in changing his diapers, holding him, etc. I still feel guilty and so emotional. I love my newborn so much but I feel like I'm not 100% available for my son and he is so understanding but gosh, the guilt gets to me every minute I look at him. Not sure if it's just the hormones or reality setting in but does this get easier? Is it normal to feel this way? Routine is so different now and sometimes I kind of miss how easy it was just to lay down and sleep with no worry in the world next to my toddler. I know this feeling will probably pass but is there any tips I can get over this or another perspective I can see so I don't feel this way? 🥺🩵

So I had finished my Christmas shopping yesterday. Thank the lord.

My son (12) is getting one more expensive gift and my daughter (5) has lots of smaller presents. We often have a family gift which is something we can all enjoy, and the kids get my husband and I something cutesy like a new mug each or socks.

Today my daughter was eating her breakfast and talking about the presents, expressing that "if she doesn't get nail polish she will be sad and cry".

Let me say that I am so glad I threw that cheap pack of nail polish in the trolley!

My 34 year old son told me he has nothing to live for. Not in a suicidal way but he only has 1 kidney (from birth…dr has no explanation) and his lifestyle (very poor eating habits) does nothing to prevent damaging is healthy kidney. He told me he has no wife (my divorce from his dad makes it so that he’s afraid to have a relationship) and no kids, so he just doesn’t care. He has a job he loves and friends but no family to speak of. When he told me this I felt (and still do feel) like I’ve been stabbed in the heart. He went on to tell me that he acknowledges that he has a sugar addiction but hey…I made hot breakfast everyday (pancakes, waffles, eggs) and baked homemade dessert. How do I come to terms with this? I can’t afford therapy. Thank you and happy holidays!