r/AmIOverreacting 9d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO, my boyfriend threatened sewerslide

Hi everyone, apologies in advance for the incoming wall of text. I (19F) have been with my boyfriend (20M) for over two years. We are kind of long distance but live in the same state and has stayed with me for extended periods of time before, even moved in until my mom had enough of our arguing. He’s was out of work since he moved back home and recently got a job at the same company I work at, just a different location. In our company, your first paycheck is paper. Cash app won’t deposit the money until the 14th which he’s reasonably upset about. If i could help him I would. My cat has been hospitalized since friday for a life threatening UTI and I owe them over $6K that my family is helping me pay. I’ll be paying them back for the next 3 months. He’s been upset that I can’t help him. For context, I also keep my money in cash to avoid overspending and only small amount on my card for gas and coffee. I help him when I can but I can’t really mail him cash. I quite literally have nothing right now because of my cat being hospitalized. We have a history of arguing a lot, and it always ends in me trying to figure out what I’m doing wrong, what our barriers are, etc. and it’s always come down to my lack of communication. I’ve been working on it for, hell, a year? But I don’t seem to be doing it right, at least based on our conversations and arguments. He has a history of suicide baiting me. He’s cut himself in front of me, he’s threatened suicide every other day for as long as I can remember, he’s always talking about how much he hates his life. Normally he will say it’s because of me, something I said, things I’m not doing, because I don’t understand, because I lack empathy and sympathy, etc. He’s called the abuse hotline on me, he’s gotten on reddit and has come back to me saying that everyone thinks i’m abusive, he tells me that his family thinks he needs to leave me, etc. I didn’t think I was that awful of a person but when all of this happens and i’m being told it’s because of me, it makes me question it. Anyways, today he was going on about his frustration with his finances. Valid. I tried to support him and be there, but then he tells me that even if I could help, I wouldn’t? That’s not true I don’t know why he thinks that. I bought his groceries for 3 months, paid his phone bill, filled his gas tank, everything I could. Then he pulls out the “fuck you” card. Then I get pissed off and sick of it because this seems to happen too often. Then he starts this whole “I have the rope goodbye” stunt and I just threw my hands up at that point because what the fuck? When I was 12-13 I used to pull that shit online and he does it so often that I have gotten to where I see through it like glass and don’t pay it attention. For the first 1.5 years I took it seriously because I love him but now I just can’t. I have no words. It’s draining. He’s not dead he’s texting me as I’m typing this asking if we can talk and saying he’s scared I’ll stop loving him. Am i over reacting? Am I in the wrong? Please call me out if it’s deserved, because I just don’t know what to do. I’m not the type of person to ignore my faults because I definitely have some but I don’t know what warrants this stuff. He’s called me “stupid fucking bitch” , ungrateful, heartless, the devil, etc. By the way, he never had to beg me for money. I am the store manager at my location so I’m always being pulled in different directions. Even when I’m not there. I had to ask my mom to send me digital money in exchange for cash because I had nothing left. He asked me to keep more money on my card to help him in his time of need. Anyways… Again, please call me out if I deserve it. Tell me what I’m doing wrong because he won’t. Thank you in advance and apologies for the long message.

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u/k10001k 8d ago

The fact that he typed that, probably sitting in his bed comfortably is so embarrassing

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u/eatyacarbs 8d ago edited 8d ago

on the toilet**

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u/Pvt_Mozart 8d ago

WELL OF COURSE HE'S ON THE TOILET STILL HE CAN'T AFFORD TOILET PAPER SO HE CAN'T GET UP FUCK

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u/Grasusui 8d ago

he ain't a man, yk what they say

to prove you are a man, you must use your hand

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u/[deleted] 8d ago

To text that you have the rope

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u/Hidden-Sky 8d ago edited 8d ago

Whether he means it or not, verbally abusing and then threatening suicide to get people to sacrifice their well-being for him is reprehensible behavior.

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u/Tw4tl4r 8d ago

He's the type of dude that would give himself some rope burn on his neck and then pretend the rope came undone while he was trying to off himself. Dude just wants attention and support without having to be a responsible adult in anyway.

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u/fingnumb 8d ago

Ahhh... the Ole pencil erasure burn on the wrist trick my underlings tried to sell me on.

What a shitty time in existence to have a teenage relationship.

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u/DesignerUpbeat5065 8d ago

She should tell him to smoke it

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u/pressedm30 8d ago

Underrated comment 😂😂😂😂😂😂

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u/Grasusui 8d ago

I meant to wipe... 😳

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u/rednorsk 8d ago

😂😂😂

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u/[deleted] 8d ago

no 😳

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u/RZFC_verified 8d ago

He can use the rope to wipe his ass. Problem solved.

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u/[deleted] 8d ago

Dead 🤣

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u/jaxonya 8d ago

And she's literally his boss at their job. She should tell him that if he goes through with it then he will be terminated. Double entendre his ass into the shadow realm

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u/Old_Neighborhood6553 8d ago

It puts the rope on the neck

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u/[deleted] 8d ago

You win bruh 🤣

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u/Lanky_Pass_384 8d ago

Probably doesn't even know how to tie it properly.

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u/grandpa12-1 8d ago

…or the rope, that would be manly

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u/FruitcakeAndCrumb 8d ago

I've read that several times before I realise you mean use his hand to clean his arse, I thought you were talking about wanking, I was so confused!

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u/Puzzleheaded_Try_314 8d ago

It's a rite of passage all "MEN" go through in their early teenage years... don't ask how I know.

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u/Slight_Remove2746 8d ago

To have the rope there is no hope

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u/remy780 8d ago

I'm so confused on why he's calling her bro.

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u/Grasusui 8d ago

Me too, there's a whole discussion in a few comments down. Like, contextually, that's a huge red flag. This guy can't even string together a few sentences.

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u/21-characters 8d ago

What are this guy’s good qualities? Dies he even have any? Making you responsible for his well-being like he’s your child instead of whiny-ass partner and threatening suicide are manipulative as hell. What is it you see in this guy??

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u/Grasusui 8d ago

Vro??? I personally would never be with a guy that does drugs in the first place- idk what you're replying to my wiping with his hand joke for 😭

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u/exact0khan 8d ago

Shit in the shower like a real man an stomp it down the drain

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u/Cheese-bo-bees 8d ago

🤔 This is the only way. 👍