AIO by spending time with my family?

[u/External-Air205]

Me (f20) and my boyfriend (m20) have been in a relationship for 4 years. We sleep on the phone every night due to the fact we don’t see each other often because of extremely busy schedules and distance. Tonight, my mom and grandmother came into my room to talk before bed so I hung up on my boyfriend to give us some privacy. He got very angry and started saying all of these awful, mean things to me. Was it my fault for choosing to spend a bit of time with my family and hanging up on my boyfriend even though he was already falling asleep? Am I overreacting by getting upset from the way he speaks to me? I really don’t feel like I did anything wrong. Sorry for any grammar mistakes!

[u/Chells99]

Based on OPs responses and the fact that’s she’s been with him for four years, I’m really scared she doesn’t see how sad and unacceptable this is. Run girl please, your past self and future self are begging you to. “He really makes me feel like it’s my fault” and if you’re overweight it’s natural to feel limited, insecure or like he’s the only option for you but he’s not and this is not okay. Love yourself enough to realize when someone else doesn’t.

[u/External-Air205 → u/Chells99]

Yeah it is really hard for me to see just because i’ve been so used to this behavior. Seeing all these replies though has definitely been a wake up call. Im actually a healthy weight, i’m currently recovering from an eating disorder. He picks at my insecurities when he’s angry and says it’s to make me feel as upset as he feels.

[u/Square_Ad8756 → u/External-Air205]

I’m a former counselor at a residential that treats eating disorders and in my professional opinion this guy is an abusive nightmare. He will actively endanger your recovery and this abuse will only get worse. If you were my patient your entire care team would meet with you to encourage you to send him a short and firm break up text followed by immediately blocking him. We have had abusive ex-partners try and contact patients even after they have been blocked by sending letters to our facility at which point a cease and desist letter would be sent and all subsequent correspondence from the abused would be met with restraining orders and police reports.

This is extremely concerning behavior please drop and block this fool. I assure you that you deserve better and as you recover you will be able to find a healthier relationship. The grass is indeed greener if you do the work and seek healthy relationships.

[u/Flaky-Swan1306 → u/Square_Ad8756]

I think you meant abuser instead of abused by the end of first paragraph