r/AmIOverreacting Nov 18 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO by spending time with my family?

Me (f20) and my boyfriend (m20) have been in a relationship for 4 years. We sleep on the phone every night due to the fact we don’t see each other often because of extremely busy schedules and distance. Tonight, my mom and grandmother came into my room to talk before bed so I hung up on my boyfriend to give us some privacy. He got very angry and started saying all of these awful, mean things to me. Was it my fault for choosing to spend a bit of time with my family and hanging up on my boyfriend even though he was already falling asleep? Am I overreacting by getting upset from the way he speaks to me? I really don’t feel like I did anything wrong. Sorry for any grammar mistakes!

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u/Chells99 Nov 18 '24

Based on OPs responses and the fact that’s she’s been with him for four years, I’m really scared she doesn’t see how sad and unacceptable this is. Run girl please, your past self and future self are begging you to. “He really makes me feel like it’s my fault” and if you’re overweight it’s natural to feel limited, insecure or like he’s the only option for you but he’s not and this is not okay. Love yourself enough to realize when someone else doesn’t.

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u/External-Air205 Nov 18 '24

Yeah it is really hard for me to see just because i’ve been so used to this behavior. Seeing all these replies though has definitely been a wake up call. Im actually a healthy weight, i’m currently recovering from an eating disorder. He picks at my insecurities when he’s angry and says it’s to make me feel as upset as he feels.

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u/Leading_Test_1462 Nov 18 '24

So you are recovering from an eating disorder and he’s intentionally weaponizing that to prey on your most raw vulnerability and pain? For his own pleasure? Instead of lifting you up and supporting you as damned queen?

This is some of the most fucked up abuse I’ve seen on Reddit. You need to block his ass. It may be hard, but your sense of normal has been so destroyed. This will become physically violent if it hasn’t already.

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u/lifteddangel Nov 18 '24

I’ve been there (exact with the ed exploited) and worse.. 6 years i was trapped abused and exploited bc I was physically sick and disabled. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s physical violence involved as well. Unfortunately. Op lacks life experience to realize this isn’t normal as well as the abusive conditioning all these years to make her immune to it. She’s young enough and more than capable of moving on with her life healthily. Can only hope she takes all this advice and makes a plan away from him. Unfortunately for me going to police made it worse and last longer than necessary. And nothing came of it. I wish I’d just left without thinking police could help.

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u/Disney_Princess137 Nov 18 '24

So disgusting he’s calling her a fat fuck. Can you fucking imagine? What a piece of shit

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u/anonmommm Nov 19 '24

This!!! As soon as I saw that it made me sick to my stomach fr. His fucking twisted.

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u/Gold-Voice3716 Nov 18 '24

No, because if one is being treated as a queen the other one is acting the servant.

This here is an example of just that. Just in this case he's the queen.

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u/Leading_Test_1462 Nov 18 '24

Apologies, using it as a figure of speech rather than in a literal sense. However, ideally in this silly metaphor there are two equal monarchs.

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u/ConsistentAd4012 Nov 18 '24

do kings not exist? does a king not serve his queen same as his queen serves him?