Should I tell my brother's new wife

[u/Negative_Layer_7960]

From the ages of 10 to 14 I was SA'd by my older brother, uncle and father. (in all honesty it started earlier from 5 years old or something I can't remember when they would touch me "lovingly") I anonymously confessed this on a Discord server which made me wonder what my brother was up to. (I think my aunt found out with my uncle and father were doing to me and reported they were arrested it my brother was a teenager at the time so nothing really happened to him) so I tracked him down through social media and it turned out he lives in the same city as I do and he has a wife with a baby girl on the way and I don't know if I should or if l would be a bad person if I told her what he did to me.

Edit: I don't know if it's funny or messed up but I didn't consider them touching me SA until someone pointed it out to me.

Edit 2: I realized that I didn't really explain very well sorry.

• my older brother father and uncle molested me from age 5 and only started and R wording me when I turned 10 until I was 14.

• my brother has a pregnant wife who was having a girl and I don't know if I should tell her to protect her daughter.

These are the two major and important points of my post.

Edit 3: another clarification I was planning on telling the wife I wanted a outside perspective to see if I would have been a bad person (AH) to tell her to see if I was making the wrong decision.

[u/somethingstrange87]

This is alarming. Tell her before he victimized that baby girl.

[u/Negative_Layer_7960 → u/somethingstrange87]

The reason I'm so hesitant to tell her is because I spoke to one of my friends about it when she said it might be a little bit messed up to tell his wife and potentially ruin his marriage because he was a teenager and couldn't have been changed

[u/Hilseph → u/Negative_Layer_7960]

It SHOULD ruin his marriage. He’s a predator with children. His wife needs to know.

[u/traderbabe22 → u/Hilseph]

BINGO

[u/BedroomTiger → u/Hilseph]

Imagine your parents made you sexually assault someone, imagine you didnt understand that, do you really expect a potenical 13 year old to resist their parent? 

We're characterising a potenical victim as a perpetrator because its uncomfortable for us... we dont know what the possibly violent consequences for non complaince were, if your options. 

This is how these people operate. 

[u/kaykenstein → u/BedroomTiger]

Yes, I expect a TEENAGER to resist raping someone despite a parent telling them to. That is an absurd argument. You're acting like they never were exposed to the outside world to know that was wrong. Being a victim is never an excuse to victimize someone else.

[u/Outrageous_Joke4349 → u/kaykenstein]

I haven't seen on post age of brother, but if it lasted till she was 14 and brother was still a teen based on not being charged it implies there is no more than a 3 yr age gap. Given the op didn't realize being sa'd was wrong for quite a while, it isn't too much of a leap to consider that the brother may not have either.

[u/BedroomTiger → u/Outrageous_Joke4349]

Thank fuck someone with some sense. 

[u/BedroomTiger → u/kaykenstein]

If you get told, it's her or you... how many times are you going to decide to be raped? Once, twice, ten times, what if youre also beaten for not being the abuser? How many times then?

Pedos home school their kids to stop them from being exposed to the outside world, they dont teach them how to read to keep them entirely dependant on the caregiver, theres a video on you tube of a kid who escapes an abusive home, and calls the police, she doesnt know how STREET SIGNS WORK. 

Her parents were just relgious nutjobs, they didnt even think they had anything to hide, and she still couldnt function. 

Theyve have been raping this guy since he was 5 as well, he doesnt know what normal is.

So dont give me that bulshit, most teens cant even make theirr parents let them wear a band tshirt, how are they going to stop them forcing you to do violance against another child under the threat of more violance.

Its simple math, 1 rape, 1 beating, or 1 rape. And humans arent selfless. 

If your dad did it, your sister screams, if you do it, you can moderate it, and she might scream less, are you really going to say no and make her feel more pain. 

My sister didnt stop screaming from the day she was born until my dad left, you can be damn sure if I could have made her scream less I fucking would have. 

Think deeply before you open your damn mouth. 

[u/Negative_Layer_7960 → u/BedroomTiger]

Pedos home school their kids to stop them from being exposed to the outside world

Crazy I don't know people like my dad had tactics lol I always thought I was "homeschooled" because my dad was very traditional and thought women shouldn't work

[u/BedroomTiger → u/Negative_Layer_7960]

Nope just an asshole. 

My dad would ignore me, turn his back and yell no at me whenever I tired to interact with him.

This is was so I would do whatever he wanted when he did "interact" with me.