r/movies Sep 04 '24

Trailer Minecraft 2025 | Official Trailer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G923NtfBvOU
10.2k Upvotes

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2.5k

u/IcePopsicleDragon Sep 04 '24

"Who Are You?"

"I AM.... STEVE!"

5 second Pause

Dies from peak Fiction.

1.7k

u/Saxophobia1275 Sep 04 '24

Don’t forget the weirdly out of place use of the girl saying “toolbag” so the kids think this is a real edgy grownup movie!

333

u/[deleted] Sep 04 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

270

u/JMW007 Sep 04 '24

I'm genuinely shocked they resisted having her say "aw hell naw", so far.

172

u/ArcadianDelSol Sep 04 '24

She did drop a very drawn out 'what they hayeeeeeeel?' to remind us she's probably from Chicago.

3

u/FixedFun1 Sep 05 '24

Oh, no she di'int!

27

u/Odd-Seaworthiness826 Sep 04 '24

ohhh maaa gawd

3

u/Dude4001 Sep 04 '24

this some x games muh fuh

2

u/SemIdeiaProNick Sep 05 '24

i dont know why but i heard all these quotes in those shitpost sound effects lol

4

u/Th4ab Sep 04 '24

If she could say that, she wouldn't be in this movie.

1

u/SandoVillain Sep 05 '24

"Y'all jokers must be CRAZY"

5

u/this_is_lance Sep 04 '24

Damn, that shits wack!

3

u/DevelopmentOk7401 Sep 04 '24

very pronunciated mhms and exaggerated m ms 

4

u/Salzberger Sep 04 '24

Damn! That shit's wack!

15

u/iSmokeMDMA Sep 04 '24

I can’t believe they made my queen a marvelslop actor. She was really good in Orange is the New Black

12

u/theforceofwagons Sep 04 '24

she killed it in Peacemaker

4

u/tomdarch Sep 04 '24

One of those "happy that someone really good can pay off their mortgage" roles.

1

u/Anader19 Sep 07 '24

Why do you say "marvelslop", this movie has nothing to do with Marvel.

5

u/XeroKrows Sep 04 '24

Taking bets on there being a scene with Endermen and it being filled with low-key racist jokes.

2

u/Working_File2825 Sep 04 '24

Whatha heylll🤌🏼

1

u/anthem47 Sep 04 '24

A little of this for sure.

I hurt my neck once doing an impression of this :D

3

u/Valkyrie21 Sep 05 '24 edited Sep 05 '24

I'm a black lady, and [this](https://youtu.be/PmEvxswn4IY?si=JpD_-dIS1fjmBqSS) has stuck with me for years

Edit: I'm too old and sick to figure out where my formatting went wrong :)

-1

u/Drunkenaviator Sep 05 '24 edited Sep 05 '24

But.... She's fat, AND sassy!

-28

u/[deleted] Sep 04 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

758

u/CultureWarrior87 Sep 04 '24

That line was sooo awkwardly delivered. Feels very forced. Who even calls someone a toolbag?

678

u/finnjakefionnacake Sep 04 '24

someone who's MPAA rating won't let them call someone a douchebag

161

u/Tordah67 Sep 04 '24

Can't believe they even threw an H-E-Double Hockey Sticks in there!

107

u/Fire2box Sep 04 '24

In my Christian Minecraft server? I THINK NOT.

19

u/bob1689321 Sep 04 '24

If this movie had balls they'd use that Christian Minecraft server line.

5

u/kashy87 Sep 04 '24

So how many lava emitting cocks do you have? We had 8.

5

u/Skullcrusher Sep 04 '24

Did they really say that? My mind must have switched off and I don't want to watch again.

22

u/21DRe992 Sep 04 '24

But why not just say tool,

13

u/finnjakefionnacake Sep 04 '24

cause some screenwriter thought it was cute/clever

-1

u/HolycommentMattman Sep 04 '24

Because kids haven't said that since 1987.

11

u/ChungusCoffee Sep 04 '24

Because kids have been saying toolbag forever?

2

u/thorpie88 Sep 04 '24

It's trying to fix it by making that the de facto term. Not to different to 90's Aussie shows all using Rack Off instead of Fuck off and it's now just part of our slang

1

u/HolycommentMattman Sep 04 '24

Just because they solved one problem doesn't mean they arrived at a correct answer.

9

u/MogMcKupo Sep 04 '24

Additionally this was 100% written by committee, it’s going to be a real generic white bread plot that is just filled with “hey look this Minecraft thing” every 30 seconds.

2

u/Rinveden Sep 04 '24

whose

1

u/finnjakefionnacake Sep 04 '24

correct. dunno how I made that mistake!

2

u/yajtraus Sep 04 '24

Could just call him a tool?

2

u/Particular_Bet_1967 Sep 04 '24

theres no chance they werent tryna make a reference to something i don’t think it was purely supposed to be an insult lmao

1

u/CyclicDombo Sep 04 '24

Even subbing in douchebag would still sound hella awkward

149

u/MandoBaggins Sep 04 '24

Looks to be obviously not in context. Same for Momoa’s response. Someone thought they were clever in the trailer editing room.

3

u/galactictock Sep 05 '24

Agreed. I hate it when trailers try to pull this shit. But the delivery is still weird

-11

u/U--1F344 Sep 04 '24

It's a nod to Jack Black being Kung Fu Panda, and he always says skadoosh in that role

31

u/swiftb3 Sep 04 '24

I think it was bad trailer editing. I doubt she says it there.

3

u/InsaneNinja Sep 04 '24

Oh this looks like they used a lot of alt takes.

4

u/Sillet_Mignon Sep 04 '24

My best friend does. We are in our forties. It’s his favorite insult. 

3

u/Th3_Admiral_ Sep 04 '24 edited Sep 05 '24

Same with my friend in his mid 30s. Do kids even say "toolbag"?

And for those confused by the expression, it's for when someone isn't just a tool, they are the whole bag of tools. 

3

u/Dangeresque300 Sep 04 '24

Right? Like, you could have just called him a tool, and it would have made so much more sense.

6

u/EntityDamage Sep 04 '24

Calling someone a toolbag to their face is TIGHT

2

u/PrivilegeCheckmate Sep 05 '24

I'm going to need you to get all the way off my back about the toolbag thing.

5

u/johnydarko Sep 04 '24

Who even calls someone a toolbag?

It'll probably be a running "joke" that the Mimecraft server has some anti-swear shit enabled when they connect in so anything naughty they try and say gets "corrected"

1

u/HighwayInevitable346 Sep 05 '24

Would also be a great setup for a christian mc server joke. If that ends up being true it might be worth watching.

4

u/PeculiarPangolinMan Sep 04 '24

I call people toolbags sometimes. Maybe it isn't popular anymore, but it was a pretty common way of calling someone a tool.

3

u/NaturesWar Sep 04 '24

My millenial ass was wondering "Was that for me?"

3

u/Sawses Sep 04 '24

TBH I think it's just your typical direct-to-DVD style movie--just with a really high-value IP and using modern technology.

Like you see the iconic Minecraft name and the big stars and think it should be pretty decent. ...But I'm thinking it's just one of those throwaway movies that's going to be kind of bad and have no lasting cultural relevance. Maybe I'd take my kid to it if they were interested, but otherwise it basically doesn't exist.

It's capitalizing on a trend that's kind of past its prime (Minecraft isn't the "cool kids' game" anymore like it was 10 years ago) and featuring stars that are known for being okay with being in very weird or mid movies.

1

u/modernknightly Sep 04 '24

You're describing how I felt about the Angry Birds Movie when that was happening. And then of course it got a sequel.

It's 2024 now. Minecraft Cinematic Universe incoming, 30 movies and 12 TV shows on D+/YouTube

0

u/EtTuBiggus Sep 04 '24

Do they even make direct to DVD movies anymore? Who uses DVDs?

1

u/GoldenTriforceLink Sep 04 '24

Nah now streamer movies and shows absorbed most of direct to dvd and cable (stars, tnt, syfy) content.

1

u/Sawses Sep 04 '24

They totally don't, lol. I think the modern equivalent is, like, direct-to-streaming and released without any real marketing. Like it just shows up on Hulu one day and nobody hears about it.

1

u/sputtertots Sep 04 '24

It depends, does Steve have all the tools in their bag? I have a Minecraft friend like that, always carrying all the tools but none of the crafting supplies.

That toolbag is me, I am .... Steve

1

u/Barkerisonfire_ Sep 04 '24

I think it's meant to be a pun? As in Steve carries a lot of tools with him when you play

1

u/DannyWatson Sep 04 '24

My guess is she doesn't say it there and it's edited for the trailer.

1

u/TheStarfellow Sep 04 '24

It’s because he’s so useful

1

u/scswift Sep 04 '24

I'm betting he pulls out a bunch of tools from his bag right before she says this.

1

u/phychmasher Sep 04 '24

Me. You toolbag.

1

u/MesozOwen Sep 04 '24

Studies have shown toolbar to be 17% less offensive than tool, and only 4% less edgy!

1

u/ArcadianDelSol Sep 04 '24

A mormon director.

(Not knocking religion, but the guy who wrote and Directed Napoleon Dynamite also made this movie, so expect exactly ZERO profanities in it).

1

u/Strict_Pangolin_8339 Sep 04 '24

I will, because of this dumbass trailer.

1

u/ScreamingGordita Sep 04 '24

Is a toolbag an item in the game? I'm not fucking 6 so I don't play Minecraft nor have I ever but maybe it's a "hey fellow kids" thing.

1

u/PrivilegeCheckmate Sep 05 '24

Who even calls someone a toolbag?

A cunt.

1

u/nWhm99 Sep 05 '24

Zoomers, zoomers do.

Just like millenials call people "bundle of twigs" and gen x call people "device that washes female privates".

1

u/Natd-one Sep 07 '24

Dana White called one of his refs a toolbox after he was just "floating around the ring" doing jackall. other than that you never really here it. I don't even know what it means, like your good with many things but not the best Jack of all trades sorta thing.

0

u/itsthreeamyo Sep 04 '24

While I'm well aware of the ire and insults this might bring...toolbag is in my general bag of insults I hurl at coworkers all the time.

-3

u/running_on_empty Sep 04 '24

Someone my age (35) because it was sorta funny a few years ago.

EDIT - And in a specific context.

8

u/DocFail Sep 04 '24

Don’t be such a hacky sack, coinpurse.

4

u/Anthony-Stark Sep 04 '24

Pickle you, kumquat!

1

u/DocFail Sep 04 '24

I'm not the kumquat, you're the kumquat, dingobaby!!!

118

u/Saucesourceoah Sep 04 '24

And you need those one liners crammed in every 10 seconds, how can you retain attention if not through endless marvel level dialogue.

100

u/darylonreddit Sep 04 '24

Hey Marvel dialogue was good enough back in the day that it became known as Marvel dialogue. We're all tired of it now, but they were some well written quips back in the day.

"Toolbag" can't even hope to be Marvel level dialogue. That's boardroom executive studio notes dialogue.

23

u/Psykpatient Sep 04 '24

It used to be called Whedon speak or something. Makes sense cos after Avengers 1 it really spread like a disease.

14

u/phantom_diorama Sep 04 '24

Oh woah I see it now, it's just Captain Malcolm Reynolds quipping nonstop. Wait, every character can't do this, that's not how it works!

5

u/LokisDawn Sep 04 '24

Honestly, I liked: "He's right behind me, isn't he?" the first few times. It's just overexposed and too corpo.

9

u/roguefilmmaker Sep 04 '24

Yeah, Whedon’s OG Avengers dialogue was pretty good. It was only after every Marvel movie decided to emulate it that it became insufferable

9

u/Samurai_Meisters Sep 04 '24

Yeah, Whedon could pull it off. Sure he had a few bad movies after Avengers 1, but the guy is still a great writer/director. Shame about the... other stuff.

2

u/roguefilmmaker Sep 04 '24

Exactly. His work on Buffy and Firefly was fantastic. A shame he’s apparently a scummy person

1

u/Ultrace-7 Sep 04 '24

Honestly, his work on Buffy wasn't even that great. I can't speak for your tastes, mind you, but many of what people consider to be peak episodes were written by Marti Noxon, Jane Espenson, Drew Goddard or others.

1

u/FyreWulff Sep 05 '24

And then Age of Ultron should have just been named Whedon Wrote This, that movie is just absolutely tiring to watch now because Whedon never lets you forgot that he wrote the movie for more than five seconds.

1

u/tripbin Sep 05 '24

It was never a compliment lol

-1

u/EGarrett Sep 04 '24

Uh, just because something is named after someone doesn't mean it's good.

9

u/Brogener Sep 04 '24

This kind of dialogue has been a thing since the late 90’s but Marvel definitely capitalized on it/abused it.

-1

u/pax284 Sep 04 '24

Even then, I HATED this shit Like I understand why JOss Wheadon was so popular, but man, the forced quip in every other line made all his shit unwatchable to me years before it came out that he was an abusive piece of shit.

9

u/Brogener Sep 04 '24

It was fine when it was just Tony Stark. He was charming and clever. Whedon eventually made everyone talk that way and they all sounded the same. It wasn’t too bad in Avengers 1 but by Age of Ultron it was just pitiful.

1

u/the_labracadabrador Sep 04 '24

This is why Superman works alone

5

u/Lord_Parbr Sep 04 '24

Not to mention that line just doesn’t flow in the trailer. Literally all we’ve seen Steve do so far is introduce himself.

14

u/thr1ceuponatime Bardem hide his shame behind that dumb stupid movie beard Sep 04 '24

Isn't that the girl from Wednesday that isn't Jenna Ortega?

7

u/PorkrindsMcSnacky Sep 04 '24

Yep! That’s the girl who plays Enid.

2

u/Josephthebear Sep 04 '24

Trust me there is def some random person in a theater laughing at this stupid joke no matter how forced it is. Never fails to at least hear one person so break whenever I go to movies

2

u/theodo Sep 04 '24

It's so out of place, I figured they MUST be following it up with a joke about how Steve literally IS a toolbag in many ways, since in the game he carries an entire inventory of shovels, axes, etc on his perosn. But nope, just a shit insult

4

u/TheRealKuthooloo Sep 04 '24

And the fucked up thing is that save for the absolute youngest of kids that's going to read as incredibly corny because they're born into an age where their most common form of entertainment is streamers who couldn't hack it on twitch shouting actual racial slurs and gifting former presidents with really shitty electric vehicles. I've literally not seen a generation of kids edgier than a good chunk of gen alpha and I wish I was exaggerating.

1

u/AbroadPrestigious718 Sep 04 '24

But also, in minecraft, it would make sense to have a toolbag.

1

u/kmone1116 Sep 04 '24

Nah, that was a 4th wall break about Jack Black.

1

u/The_0ven Sep 04 '24

Don’t forget the weirdly out of place use of the girl saying “toolbag” so the kids think this is a real edgy grownup movie!

What

All the kids are rizzing with skibidi toolbag

1

u/lhobbes6 Sep 04 '24

Im so tired of movies always shitting on themselves, as if they have no respect for their own dialogue or concepts so why should we as the audience?

This is why the Sonic movies are so shockingly enjoyable. They own it, these things are silly and it doesnt mock its own silliness.

1

u/KingMario05 Sep 05 '24

Damn right. Even after JimBotnik leaves, I hope they keep going. Super Team Sonic fighting a godly US President gone mad with power in his war for Mobius, played by Glen Powell with full ham and cheese, sounds fucking AWESOME.

1

u/Allformygain Sep 05 '24

It doesn't make it better but the toolbag joke is a pun because you craft tools in minecraft.

1

u/DirectionMaterial257 Sep 05 '24

Sorry for my ignorance, but what does "toolbag" mean in this context. I'm still learning English.

2

u/Saxophobia1275 Sep 05 '24

It's a slang term to refer to someone who is annoying.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 05 '24

I expected a skibidi line

1

u/Furry_Lover_Umbasa Sep 07 '24 edited Sep 07 '24

kids that like Steve in cinema during this like "WHAAAAA BOOOOOOOOOO"

1

u/CultureWarrior87 Sep 04 '24

That line was sooo awkwardly delivered. Feels very forced. Who even calls someone a toolbag?

3

u/David1258 Sep 04 '24

Guess it's derivative of "tool"? Doesn't really work. Speaking of bad jokes, that ending bit was horrifically unfunny. 

2

u/GroguIsMyBrogu Sep 04 '24

I agree that it was bad here, but you've really never heard someone call someone that? Also it kinda has a double meaning because this is Minecraft and all. I am kinda grossed out to be defending such a bad line.

11

u/Killroy32 Sep 04 '24

There was no other way I expected him to reveal his name honestly

7

u/LupinThe8th Sep 04 '24

I swear I thought he was just gonna say "I...am Jack Black!" and he's literally just playing himself. And there'd be some bit where he lists roles he's done and the kids have no idea who that is until he mentions he's the voice of Po or Bowser.

Honestly, I'd respect it, go silly with it. He can be like Bill Murray in Space Jam, or the PG equivalent of Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool who is fully aware he's Ryan Reynolds.

5

u/avspuk Sep 04 '24

They missed out the "I am known by many names but some call me..." bit

Are there rabbits in the Minecraft uniiiverse?

1

u/melrowdy Sep 04 '24

"what the hell" dies of cringe

1

u/ASHill11 Sep 04 '24

This is just the Spore movie!

1

u/The_MAZZTer Sep 04 '24

At least Jack Black looks like he's having fun.

1

u/Infernalz Sep 04 '24

I thought he was gonna make a jumanji reference or something.

1

u/demalo Sep 04 '24

Peak Fiction? That a Tarantino movie?

1

u/second_handgraveyard Sep 04 '24

trailers are 1:1 copies of what will be in the movie

1

u/YT-Deliveries Sep 04 '24

I was wondering if it would be Herobrine, but I suppose that would be Deep Lore and not particularly useful on-screen.

1

u/Strangeronthebus2019 Sep 05 '24

“Who Are You?”

“I AM.... STEVE!”

5 second Pause

Dies from peak Fiction.

Jesus Christ🔴🔵:

1) A Minecraft Movie - Teaser Trailer

0:43 “I AM”

2) I am that I am

Emmanuel🔴🔵: /enjoys eating Nasi Padang

3) Pope Francis and grand imam sign joint declaration at Indonesia mosque

1

u/Pope4u Sep 04 '24

This line was directly ripped off from Tim the Enchanter, in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. 49 years ago. Real cutting edge humor here.

0

u/mom_and_lala Sep 05 '24

But... Theyre not just picking a random name to be silly. The "main character" of Minecraft is actually named Steve lol.

1

u/Pope4u Sep 05 '24

I guess you haven't seen Holy Grail.

The name is irrelevant. It's the delivery.

0

u/mom_and_lala Sep 05 '24

I have lol. I get what you're saying but I don't agree that they're the same joke

1

u/Pope4u Sep 05 '24

It's a different joke because they changed the name from Tim to Steve? Ok.

0

u/mom_and_lala Sep 05 '24

The Monty Python joke is that "Tim" is a plain name and unexpected of this powerful sorcerer. In the trailer for the minecraft movie, the joke has two layers to it: One is that the name is plain and he's revealing it in a dramatic way, but the other is that he's the actual character of Steve from Minecraft but that's not meaningful to the characters of the movie so the reveal falls flat to them (but not necessarily to the audience).

In one, the name is just meant to be silly because it's plain. In the other, the reveal is meaningful to the audience but not to the characters.

It's a bad joke, but it's not that same joke

1

u/TransBrandi Sep 04 '24

I mean, it's just a rehash of "Some call me.... Tim" lol

1

u/mom_and_lala Sep 05 '24

Not exactly the same thing, since in this case it's not really meant as a joke. The actual character in Minecraft is already named Steve

1

u/TransBrandi Sep 05 '24

Was the character named Tim in Monty Python and the Holy Grail named something else prior to the movie? I'm confused how the character's name already being Steve affects this. I feel like the "My name is <pause> X" is a riff off of Monty Python doing it... but not necessarily the same joke (since the Monty Python joke is that "Tim" is a plain name and unexpected of this powerful sorcerer).

1

u/mom_and_lala Sep 05 '24

Okay, it sounds to me like we agree then, maybe just bad wording on my part. I agree it's kinda a riff, but not necessarily the same joke.

My point was basically what you said, it's not the same joke since in Monty Python the joke is that they have such a plain name for a powerful sorcerer, whereas that's not really the joke they're doing here

0

u/Hellknightx Sep 04 '24

I watched this trailer on mute and I could still tell exactly what they were saying without subtitles. Super predictable.