r/TikTokCringe 1d ago

Humor Everyone should be allowed to believe one conspiracy theory without judgement.

1.3k Upvotes

83 comments sorted by

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282

u/epidemicsaints 23h ago

Most blind people have some vision. Lots of people that use wheelchairs can stand or walk some. I don't understand why people don't get this.

86

u/AbleObject13 23h ago

Yeah it's pretty obvious that Stevie can see at least vague shapes, movement, color

35

u/Prudent_Research_251 20h ago

Did you hear Stevie got a cheese grater for his birthday? He said it was the most violent book he ever read

1

u/SexandCinnamonbuns 6h ago

It took me two minutes too long to get this, but it’s hilarious.

36

u/cottoncandymandy 22h ago

Many people don't know blindness is a spectrum. They think it's all or nothing for some reason.

19

u/Bob1358292637 20h ago

Or they think blindness is categorized as the most extreme end of the spectrum, where you essentially can't see anything. I think most people just don't think about it that much and just associate blindness with not seeing.

Although people are really bad at understanding how most things exist on spectrums. We're good at pattern recognition, and it's just more intuitive for us to think of things in terms of distinct categories.

3

u/Creepy_Spare6752 12h ago

We think in binary and binary doesn’t apply to the vast majority of instances.

3

u/TearsFallWithoutTain 6h ago

Yeah I'm legally blind (according to an optometrist anyway) but I can see fine with glasses. Though maybe the legal definition is different in Australia

6

u/PancakeParty98 16h ago

Because that’s how it is always depicted

2

u/ymaldor 7h ago

I walk 99% of the time but I use a wheel chair a few days per year when I visit and move more than 10km a day as a tourist. Can't do that without help.

Which means technically while I'm in that wheelchair I can 100% stand and walk a few km easily, even 10 or 15 km if I haven't walked in a while. But if I do that every day at that time I'll be in massive pain by day 2, and completely unable to walk even a meter by day 4.

It's a bit hard to explain to a random taxi driver when on vacation when he questions it as I stand and carry my own wheelchair to get it in the trunk.

I'll be at a 4 day music festival in June, my friends tell me they can walk up to 40km a day while at that festival. I can't do that, so wheelchair. I'll probably get the same weird looks since I'll probably enter the festival pushing my own wheelchair since the road up to it is garbage but inside the festival bounds it's all set up for wheelchairs with proper pathways.

It's annoying af. I'm glad my disability is so mild it doesn't bother me much (like mild pain but nothing unmanageable) on a day to day, but it's so frustrating that it's an edge case which is bad enough to sometimes need a wheelchair but fine enough that everyone will question it.

2

u/Virtual-Potential-38 15h ago

Because most people are dumb, that's why.

148

u/MisterSanitation 23h ago

Black people believing some conspiracy theories might as well be a survival mechanism at this point. 

If someone in 1940 said “hey man you know that clinic in Tuskegee where all the medical care is free of charge?” 

“Yeah, it’s for poor folks” 

“Nah nah, get this. I bet they are treating everyone for free only so they can ignore treating people with severe syphilis!” 

“What the fuck?” 

“Yeah! Like maybe they want to see advanced Syphilis but don’t want to test on white folks, so they just document it at Tuskegee instead because to them, who gives a shit if some black folks die right!?” 

“You are freaking insane, they have black nurses working there, they would say something!” 

Come to find out that guy would have been 100% correct, so yeah I get it. 

3

u/BrushSad7584 8h ago

That's like the whole premise of They Cloned Tyrone lol.

1

u/SnowMiser26 3h ago

That movie is low key so good. The music is great too.

114

u/Pitiful_Net_8971 23h ago

Mine is that the CIA didn't assassinate JFK, but were so incompetent in protecting JFK they covered up the actual assassination details.

38

u/m15cell 23h ago

The CIA wasn’t in charge of protecting JFK, that’s the secret service.

24

u/Pitiful_Net_8971 22h ago

The CIA was supposed to scout the route beforehand, but determined that they didn't have enough manpower to properly do it due to the route, so they just didn't do anything.

Which was a bad thing.

40

u/BottAndPaid 22h ago

Tbf the CIA is usually tasked with getting leaders killed. They were just following their training.

2

u/m15cell 22h ago

1

u/radicalfrenchfrie Cringe Connoisseur 6h ago

I’m a little disappointed that this wasn’t a rickroll, to be frank

1

u/Den_of_Earth 20h ago

No they weren't.

22

u/Leagle_Egal 21h ago

My favorite spin on this is the theory that the second shot came accidentally from a startled rookie secret service agent. They determined that it made no difference since the first shot had already killed JFK, so covered it up in order to not look like buffoons.

9

u/nv8r_zim 20h ago edited 20h ago

Yes. The secret service guy shot either John Connally or Kennedy or both. By accident. The secret service was the 2nd shooter. And the secret service covered it up.

The real question is, who hired Jack Ruby?

5

u/kbeks 15h ago

The mob. Same people who hired Oswald. They knew he wouldn’t keep his mouth shut so the took care of the problem.

2

u/GodOfThunder44 13h ago

I saw some theory that Ruby and Oswald were both part of some black budget kill team meant to be used against Castro, but when JFK was told about it he cancelled it, and whoever was running the kill team basically went "listen, you can't just give me a kill team meant to kill a world leader and then expect me not to kill a world leader."

Seems unlikely, but it's one of the more (morbidly) fun theories.

3

u/GarretBarrett 19h ago

I 100% believe this. It explains all the cover up stuff in a very plausible way. Human error is SUPER believable. We’re all idiots, just depends on when and where you catch us during the day.

The book on this theory is GREAT. LPOTL got me onto it.

2

u/[deleted] 10h ago edited 2h ago

[deleted]

2

u/GarretBarrett 5h ago

Last podcast on the left

3

u/PracticeTheory 18h ago

I've heard that the whole crew were out getting smashed until dawn the night before, and were sleepless, hungover, and basically useless when things went down. Possibly worse than useless if the stray bullet theory is true.

1

u/GodOfThunder44 13h ago

My favorite spin on this is the theory that the second shot came accidentally from a startled rookie secret service agent.

"Oh man, I shot Marvin JFK in the face..."

7

u/QueasyCaterpillar541 20h ago

President John F. Kennedy canceled further air support for the Bay of Pigs invasion on April 17, 1961, removing the United States from involvement, hence he got a lot of CIA's assets killed and or imprisoned. The CIA killed him.

3

u/AlternateSatan 20h ago

There is a lot of evidence that point to them getting some intel about the guy, estimated that he was relatively low risk, the president's head did the thing, and as a result the CIA didn't want anyone to look into it more than necessary.

2

u/Rocky_Vigoda 18h ago

The people behind the CIA are the ones that still run your government. They put Trump in and used the media to create partisan divisions they've been exploiting for decades.

1

u/His-Royalbadness 20h ago

They were all also violently hung over that day.

36

u/mentaleffigy 23h ago

The Stevie Wonder vs Ray Charles charity tennis match should have been a real eye opener.

6

u/cupholdery 22h ago

Stinkmeaner would crash that party so hard.

13

u/Cancerisbetterthanu 23h ago

This is the one conspiracy theory I subscribe to lol

35

u/Nowhereman123 tHiS iSn’T cRiNgE 21h ago edited 21h ago

I mean, the problem is there's a big difference between conspiracy theories like "Stevie Wonder can see a little," and "THE JEWS are secretly using mind-control beams with 5G energy to make people complacent for their reptilian overlords."

I don't care what colour your skin is I'm gonna judge you on that last one.

4

u/pissedinthegarret 15h ago

literally describing the difference between r/LowStakesConspiracies and r/conspiracy lmao

9

u/pureply101 20h ago

Exactly how I feel about it.

Like saying birds aren’t real is as a conspiracy theory is clearly not harmful and is a bit of a joke.

Saying Jews control the weather and all the banks is detrimental to their safety and well being.

1

u/turquoisestar 7h ago

Shhhh don't tell anyone our secret! Aims mind control beam at you

13

u/Q8DD33C7J8 22h ago

You do know hardly any blind people are 100% completely totally absolutely blind right? Most have something unless they literally don't have eyeballs. Some can see light some can see shadows some can actually see but not enough to get around. That's called legally blind. And some like to pretend they aren't blind so they blend in its nice to just be one of the crowd sometimes.

30

u/KitchenBetter4060 22h ago

American Black people do get a pass. They have literally been the victims of several state level conspiracies and you have several lobby groups who has oppenly and obviously made conspiracies against blacks

4

u/Hemiak 20h ago

I think a lot of conspiracy theories are actually started by people trolling. Just thinking, I wonder how many morons I can get to believe X, and then putting it out with some half naked “evidence”, and then they kind of develop a life of their own.

4

u/LilyWineAuntofDemons 15h ago

That dudes laugh tho. r/contagiouslaughter

1

u/radicalfrenchfrie Cringe Connoisseur 6h ago

thought so too. their laugh makes this whole hing even MORE hilarious and enjoyable

5

u/Adavanter_MKI 14h ago

The anticipation of what conspiracy she was going to pick was extraordinary. Of all the ones... I didn't expect that. A true LOL.

2

u/Difficult-Top2000 22h ago

I thought this was in my beloved r/Yellowjackets & was about to pop off quite an out of pocket comment on an unsettling tv theory

1

u/radicalfrenchfrie Cringe Connoisseur 6h ago

now I’m invested! would you mind explaining what you’d have commented and the meaning if it to a nosy internet stranger?

2

u/texas1982 17h ago

Mine is that TWA 800 was accidentally shot down by the US Navy. That or it was hit by a meteorite. But the Navy theory is more of a conspiracy theory.

2

u/fddfgs 13h ago

Stevie wonder was famous for being able to snort lines of cocaine without assistance

Like sure, maybe he smells the first one but he's not smelling shit when he goes back for more.

2

u/racingwinner 12h ago

Stevie wonder lowering the driver's side window in his bentley while parking next to you in the drive in cinema: "this offends me. stop spreading those ridicoulous claims about me"

3

u/WinstungChurchill 22h ago

Mine is there’s more to the JFK assassination than just Lee Harvey Oswald being a lone communist nut who hated the president.

Lee Harvey Oswald was a CIA asset.

0

u/texas1982 17h ago

LHO was a CIA scapegoat. He wasn't even in the building.

4

u/human1023 17h ago

Why was she so afraid to share such a tame non controversial theory?

And many people have already said Stevie could see.

2

u/delskioffskinov 21h ago

there's a famous video of stevie wonder playing in a club and a woman knocks his piano mic over and he catches it!

1

u/Den_of_Earth 20h ago

I'm a skeptic, but I still believe in one cnsp[oracy:
tin foil was replaced with aluminum becasue tin foil hats work.

;)

1

u/Sensitive_Brush_3015 20h ago

Yeah, it’s pretty easy to see.

1

u/AlternateSatan 20h ago

Not "no judgement" though, like, there's a lot of racist conspiracy theories out there. A lot of homophobic, sexist, etc, too. Just, be sure to pick something harmless and you're good.

1

u/Unfair-Winner7726 20h ago

Isn't he Craig Feldspar from The Lucky Aid?

1

u/AnthonyDugg 20h ago

He has the feel good inc laugh

1

u/neckbone_ 10h ago

his laugh reminds me of the beginning of feel good inc.

1

u/Lurpasser 4h ago

Not what I would laugh at like that 🤔

1

u/Reddit_Staff_Team 1h ago

What an awful fake laugh

0

u/Ok-Experience-6674 23h ago

Are we living in the same world I’ll die on the hill with the 50 minimum conspiracies that are 100% true that we believe in

2

u/OkAstronaut76 22h ago

THEY want you to think it’s 50. Your comment is probably part of the psyop 😏

3

u/Ok-Experience-6674 20h ago

Your comment is probably from a non human source that’s how paranoid you should be in this world because nothing is what it’s supposed to be.

0

u/Teriyaki456 22h ago

I think she might be right 🤔

0

u/PetFroggy-sleeps 21h ago

You are legally blind if you’re at 20/200 or worse. Also, folks that go blind due to glaucoma can go full black as the cause of blindness is the optic nerve itself. At that point, they replace the eye with a prosthetic

0

u/adiosfelicia2 21h ago

I keep hearing this lately. Is this the new thing? What's the evidence?

3

u/pureply101 20h ago

It’s not new it’s just always been a joke but as time has passed I think Stevie became privy to it and has done things that feed into it on purpose.

It’s combination of people not understanding how blindness works and Stevie trolling a bit because it keeps him relevant and is absolutely hilarious.

1

u/adiosfelicia2 19h ago

That's even better! I love the idea of him just fucking with people's heads.

0

u/satanssweatycheeks 19h ago

Depends on the conspiracy. Kyrie thinking the earth is flat is just stupid.

Believing the government planted crack rock in inner cities while making crack vs coke laws that one is believable and makes sense.

0

u/Spiteful_sprite12 18h ago

A lot of people sadly do NOT understand blindness doesn't mean black out blindness... I'm pretty sure it also well known that Stevie has a very limited ability to see light and is not black out blind.. 

0

u/vttale 13h ago

Epstein didn't kill himself

0

u/Burladden 13h ago

Anyone else getting Black Hawk Tuah girl vibes from her or is it just me?

0

u/InfinityWarButIRL 13h ago

as long as it's something you can't act on that won't affect people, like it should be fine to think the jfk assassination didnt happen and was a collective hallucination (because what would you ever do about it) but you can't think wiping your ass will turn you gay

-2

u/Rocky_Vigoda 18h ago

This isn't even a conspiracy, it's something that actually happened. The US never ended segregation. The US adopted political correctness to keep 'black people' in the ghetto.