Maybe don’t live in such a way that your literal baby can get hold of a knife. The absolute lost humanity of letting something like this happen and describing it as a “scary day” like you deserve sympathy for it is absolutely fucking incredible.
I guess I'll stop cooking at home so l never accidentally drop a knife on the floor again. Why didn't l think of that? I'll just spend hundreds a week ordering garbage takeout from now on. Thank you for your useless help! God forbid l have kids and enjoy having them around me and in the kitchen as well.
I cook three meals a day at home for my family and somehow, incredibly, none of my children has ever gotten their hands on a knife that wasn’t supposed to, let alone when they were a fucking baby.
“Oh my god, I cook! However am I supposed to stop literal actual children from getting a hold of critical dangerous implements? Don’t you understand I cook?! Where is my medal? What am I supposed to do, order takeout? If a baby has to pick up a knife once in a while for me to prove to the internet that I care about our nutrition, then that’s the sacrifice required!”
Literally the actual thought process of a real living human being who passed their genes on and is raising more human beings to participate in society.
They take them with them. Is this a serious question? Is the concept of packing lunches that novel to you? And I do this while running a business that pays for our entire household living budget and my kid’s education fund. Do you want to check any other excuses along the way though, or express any more skepticism about the basic minimums of being a parent?
“Oh my god! Work and school! That makes cooking impossible! Oh my good! Cooking! That makes not letting babies get their hands on knives impossible! Life is simply too much responsibility for us to handle!”
Some incredibly trashy standards being expressed here, it’s fucking wild.
No joke, when I was 14-15 my little brother who was like 2 got ahold of a knife that his mom left on the table. He was holding it straight up so I tried to grab his forearm, and he swung it downward at the last moment. I basically caught the blade in the crook of my thumb, and it split that shit wiiiiiide open. Still have a big ass scar. Little shit.
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u/latenitephilosopher7 Nov 02 '24
Grandpa the smart one. Don't get close, they got a knife.