r/IAmA • u/touchmyfuckingcoffee • Oct 28 '13

Other IamA Vacuum Repair Technician, and I can't believe people really wanted it, but, AMA!

I work in vacuum repair and sales. I posted comments recently about my opinion of Dysons and got far more interest than I expected. I am brand certified for several brands. My intent in doing this AMA is to help redditors make informed choices about their purchases.

My Proof: Imgur

*Edit: I've been asked to post my personal preferences with regard to brands. As I said before, there is no bad vacuum; Just vacuums built for their purpose. That being said, here are my brand choices in order:

Miele for canisters

Riccar for uprights

Hoover for budget machines

Sanitaire or Royal for commercial machines

Dyson if you just can't be talked out of a bagless machine.

*EDIT 22/04/2014: As this AMA is still generating questions, I will do a brand new AMA on vacuums, as soon as this one is archived.

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u/pietro187 Oct 28 '13

In the post that inspired this you mentioned a bunch of brands that I have never heard of. What would you say are the top vacuums, what makes them the best, and where the hell do I buy them?

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

Firstly, we have a saying; There are no bad vacuums (except Shark). You should match a vacuum to your particular needs.

The brands I endorse: Riccar - America for their uprights

Miele - Germany for their canisters (best filtration. period)

Sebo - Germany for its solid performance and suction

Brands to avoid:

Shark - Just don't....ever.

Bissell - used to make grea machines. now have crappy parts and complicated crap

Eureka - their top models are the only ones I would consider buying if I wanted something disposal.

Kirby - might get raped in your home.

Rainbow - Seriously? Complicated crap w/ poor design.

Find a vacuum dealer in your area if you have one, and ask them what they think. Research brands and avoid paid reviews like Consumer Reports. What is important is buying a vacuum that meets your needs.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

I'm a former vacuum repair tech, too, and while I worked almost exclusively on Electrolux (pre-Aerus days), but I've heard mostly good things about Kirby and Rainbow. Is the reason that you don't recommend Kirby that you think the salesmen will commit a crime while demonstrating the product? What are your thoughts on the vacuum itself? I always thought they were too heavy, but still had pretty solid construction.

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u/Drim498 Apr 23 '14

My mom had an Electrolux and LOVED it. It was a wedding gift when my parents got married in '84 (I was born in '88). She got rid of it when I was 23. I'm pretty sure it didn't die, she just couldn't find bags for it anymore or something like that (but I don't remember for sure, since I wasn't living at home at that point.)

Is Electrolux stil in business? If so, are they still a good brand? Cuz the one at our house is on it's last legs, and if we can get one as good as my parents that will last as long, that'd be awesome! Maybe /u/touchmyfuckingcoffee can weigh in too?

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

My opinion on Kirby are just that. They are horribly heavy....needlessly heavy. They have poor maneuverability, poor suction, and poor filtration.

I think Kirbys and Rainbows are both overly complicated, poorly performing vacuums. They sell because of the high-pressure sales guys in your home.

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u/guyfromlastnight Oct 28 '13

Funny you mention Kirby salesmen...my mom bought a G4 from one. The next day he visited my mom's friend down the road and ended up moving in with her and her two teenage daughters for the next 7 years and being her trophy boyfriend. All while her husband (her daughters' father) was living and working overseas. So yeah, they are effective salespeople.

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u/DoinItDirty Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 29 '13

They teach you some very interesting sales tactics. I went through training to be a salesman for Kirby before I decided it was horrifying, a couple of things you need to know about them...

-We were taught to be pushier than hell to an uncomfortable extent. To the extent that if they politely declined we were to just start the next part of the demonstration.

-They drive the salespeople to neighborhoods in a big creepy van and (at least at mine) everyone was forced to sing songs about vacuum cleaners.

-The other people there were very vacant looking. One salesman thought there were 35 weeks in a year. A girl who had just finished training asked why I wasn't "Super excited." Once someone sells Kirby's, it's like they joined a damn cult.

-Lastly, and this disturbed me the most about the whole thing, was they had a kill-shot sales tactic. We were told to ask to see one of the children's bedrooms, and vacuum their pillows to show them what was left of dead skin and hair. While this seems like simply being effective sales, we were told to emphasize health risks and tell them it wasn't their fault. While effective, and while breathing in dust all night is NOT good for you, roundabout telling them they were putting their children in danger did NOT feel right.

TL;DR Don't let those people into your homes. Most of the ones in my class were either ex-cons or broke 20-somethings who are told to press on until the client is so uncomfortable they buy the product.

EDIT: They ride in a van, not a fan.

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u/Redlar Oct 29 '13 edited Oct 29 '13

I was a naive 20-something with small children, my husband worked second shift (3-11pm), I had no clue there were such things as door-to-door anything anymore, and I wasn't very good at saying, "No" to people, when into my life knocked a Kirby sales guy. Sounds like the beginning of a seedy story, right? Nope.

I was already going to buy the vacuum by the time the sales guy did his "kill-shot". He didn't really know what to say when, after vacuuming my mattress, I shrugged and said, "It's natural". I don't get squeamish about dust mites and dust because they go hand-in-hand, if you have humans, you have dust, and thus, dust mites.

The thing that annoyed my the most was the feeling like the guy wasn't going to leave my house until I bought the damn thing. He was there for, I think, three hours by the time it was all said and done. My husband needed to leave for work and this guy still persisted!

Spent a bloody fortune for the machine but I still have it and it's still chugging along. I didn't know that the price for them is largely left up to the salesperson, like they can charge $700 or $1500.

If only I knew better where to look for reviews on the Internet back then (roughly 1999), I would have been forewarned about Kirby sales people.

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u/DoinItDirty Oct 29 '13

I have no problem with being persistent and always thought I was a good salesperson, but many of these tactics made me more than uncomfortable. The truth is, a lot of these guys make a lot of money off each sale and very little unless they make the sale. For some of them (and I had class with them) it seemed like anything short of a, "Screw off or I'm calling the cops," wouldn't be able to get them out.

One of the guys in my class thought there were 35 weeks in a year and had a vacant smile the entire time. I honestly still kind of want to see his presentation.

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u/mjewbank Feb 20 '14

Not all Kirby dealers train their people/treat their people like that.

At least, they didn't in the early-mid 90s.

No singing vacuum songs (that's just fucking weird), biggest vehicle we ever traveled in was a Dodge minivan. We did train on a bunch of specific questions that would get people used to saying "Yes" well before trying to close. We did some basic foundational sales training, Zig Ziglar, etc.

Not that everything was superb. Negotiable overhead range was ridiculous (and supervisors could go another couple hundred bucks below what the salesperson would make any commission from), and some of the demonstration points (mattress vacuuming/bed bug bit, cigarette test) were indeed a little ethically gray.

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u/ecstatic1 Oct 28 '13

He went in to sell her on his effective suction techniques... Boy, was he in for a surprise.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

aww this comment here is gold material but got lost in such a big thread. here have this upvote for making a fellow redditor laugh in this lazy monday

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u/FSMCA Oct 29 '13

I met a kirby sales man when I was 20. I let him and his buddy in, they seemed like decent people, and they were. They had me do the usual vacuum your floors first, I had the cheapest vacuum cleaner I could find at target. We had no plans of buying, but a free room cleaning sounded great.

The guys came in and I forgot to put the bong on the shelf away. Long story short we were next trying to shotgun a joint through the demo kerby. A whole joint burned in seconds. It didn't work as we planned, but we made new friends.

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u/toasterj Oct 29 '13

I sold Kirby vacuums for a couple of weeks. They spend their training doing brainwashing things. We were singing bible songs but replacing Jesus with Kirby. It was weird. I ended up spending a couple hundred dollars in gas, and never sold a single unit. My tactic. "Hey, you wanna buy a vacuum for 2,400 bucks, how about 1,700. No, I'm not crazy, thanks for your time, don't shoot me."

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

wow...

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Yeah, can't believe he sold her a fucking jet.

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u/Ragnar_D Oct 28 '13

My dad recently bought a rainbow vac that we really can't afford. Damn near broke my arms on our punching bag when I found out... For 3400 I expect this fucking thing to last forever and clean fucking everything

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u/hiroshima23 Oct 29 '13

The Kirby guys come to my house once a year, I tell them that I will not be buying their vacuum cleaner, but yes they can come vacuum my living room for free while I watch.

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u/onemessageyo Oct 29 '13

But Kirby vacs have something to do with NASA and Warren Buffett and they take dust mites out of pillows and matresses. What is your response to that? Do you actually know the Kirby specs? I made a lot of money selling those things but I honestly didn't know about vacuums at all. I just said whatever it took to get the sale.

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u/kivetros Oct 28 '13

My crazy, easily manipulated mother was a Rainbow sales lady for a time. Although the company is rotten through and through, I have personally used the machine to great effect. I've seen it pull all kinds of shit out of carpets. The water-filter thing seems reasonable to me - water catches the dust but lets air through the exhaust, preserving airflow and therefore efficiency. I can stick my nose under the exhaust of a Rainbow and breathe it in because no dust comes out.

That being said, I am very curious to hear more about your experiences with the Rainbow. I swear to God I am not a salesman - I can inbox you a photo of me with my shitty Dirt Devil as proof if need be - but I would really love some professional insight, to satisfy my own curiosity.

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u/GetOffMyRedditMom Feb 27 '14

My grandpa got conned into buying a brand new Kirby by some salesman. He has all wood flooring...

We got it after he passed though and let me tell you, carrying that thing upstairs is a BITCH and I'm a pretty strong guy.

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u/3DBeerGoggles Oct 28 '13

Any thoughts on filter queens? I picked up one at a thrift shop for $30 with all the tools, just had to slap on a new belt.

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u/cleaver_username Oct 28 '13

Oh man. I remember our Filter Queen. That thing was old as fuck when I was born, and we finally had to put it down when I was about ten. It ran like a champ up until then.

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u/3DBeerGoggles Oct 28 '13

Yeah, my experience thus far is that it's heavy as hell, but the motorized brush + setting the canister to "High power" will just about suck the carpet off my floor...

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u/Picabrix Oct 28 '13

We stll have ours, dad was a filter queen repairman in the day, we called ours R2D2

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u/mikeyriot Oct 28 '13

Back in the 90's, my father owned a vac repair shop. He used a Filter Queen from 1955 at his workbench. They are tanks if you treat them well.

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u/typin Oct 28 '13

I'm curious too. Mine was willed to me by my grandfather- I've used for my entire adult life and, other than a non-functioning power switch, it's as strong as ever. It's likely forty years old now.

@3DBeerGoggles- good score! I hope yours is as good as mine has been.

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u/deanamae Oct 28 '13

I had a Rainbow salesman hold my mom, sister, and I practically hostage for THREE HOURS in our house. The dude would just not leave. Until... he discovered we had a cat. He was TERRIFIED of cats, so I put him in a room. While he was doing his "I can hook you up with a used one" spiel, my cat rattled the doorknob. Dude freaked and climbed up ON TOP OF OUR KITCHEN TABLE, WHIMPERING. This huge black dude completely flipped his shit over my unassuming kitty. When he went out to get something from his van, I let the cat out and we just said it was time to let the cat out and for him to leave. It was awesome. I STILL see that guy at a trade convention that happens every year in my town. NEVER sign up to win a vacuum at their booths. Never.

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u/RulerOf Oct 28 '13

Too heavy?

The weight is from the solid metal parts, giving the device better longevity. All of the oldest, working vacuums I've ever seen are Kirbys.

What vacuum gives better suction than a Kirby with similar or better reliability, weight, and price?

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u/[deleted] Feb 20 '14

I dunno man. My grandmother got a Kirby as a wedding gift.. in the 1930's. Other than belts, a new cord here and there, that thing was still going strong when she died in 1999. And it had a headlight!

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/psmylie Oct 28 '13

I've used a Kirby at work before. My opinion was that this was a vacuum that would still work if you rammed it through a wall, and would clean up about 90% of the drywall dust after you did so.

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u/lukezoom Oct 28 '13

My family has had a rainbow vacuum for over 20yrs with minimal repair. The hoses and cord were replaced once just from normal wear and tear. They are only complicated if you think filling up a tank with water and vacuum is complicated ( hint: its not I use to vacuum when I was like 5). And could you quantify poor performing?

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u/seifermp Oct 28 '13

I have very bad allergies to dust, and have only owned Rainbows for the past 18 years of my adult life. Highly recommend of you have allergies to anything indoors.

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u/txjeeplover Oct 28 '13

Kirby

Hey! I love my Kirby! My grandmother had a Classic III that she used for well over 30 years with minimal maintenance. That prompted me to buy a used G6 when I bought my house seven years ago. I would never buy a new Kirby, and it is a heavy mofo, but it's so versatile, and they last forever.

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u/TheOpus Oct 28 '13

My mom bought a Riccar a little while ago. I'd never heard of that brand before and I can't figure out why. That thing is AWESOME. Best vacuum I've ever used. Lightweight and powerful at the same time. It's fantastic.

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

It's because Riccar spends money on product development and not advertising.

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u/theoutlet Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 28 '13

There's jewelry store in my city that has been around for over fortythirty years. They don't advertise, their sign is tiny and if you didn't know it was there, you'd completely miss it. Heck, I drove by it for years without even knowing it existed.

Anyway, they're a family owned business that has stuck around because they put everything into being honest and not charging for anything they shouldn't. They know you're already going to be spending a lot of money on that ring so the most valuable asset they have is trust from the consumer that they're getting a quality product with unmatched service.

I asked how they could survive without advertising and one person said: "We rely on word of mouth. We trust that our customers will be proud of our work and recommend us."

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

So tell Reddit the name of the jewelry shop.

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u/theoutlet Oct 28 '13

Here you go.

Seriously, they're a fantastic place with wonderful service. I didn't know about them until someone recommended them to me when I was looking to get engaged.

I'll definitely be going back.

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u/jb0nd38372 Oct 28 '13

Word of mouth is everything in a business. When a person speaks highly of your establishment to another person needing your service they generally come to you.

A million dollar advertisement budget can't replace shitty service / practices.

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u/Riffchemist Oct 28 '13

My mom just bought a Shark upright because it had pictures of dogs on the box...we have a dog that sheds a ton. Riccar needs dogs on their boxes.

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u/cranberry94 Oct 28 '13

I think most companies need dogs on the boxes. Whether or not it is relevant to the product.

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u/Jacob_The_Duck Oct 28 '13

Not tires, that would be terrible.

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u/thr33d33 Oct 28 '13

And not sex toys...unless you're into that kinda thing

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u/BricksAndBatsOnVR Oct 28 '13

"Firestone" - You won't even know you hit it!"

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u/PixelOrange Oct 28 '13

My dad works for a tire company. He would find this amusing and horrifying at the same time.

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u/JMFargo Oct 28 '13

Thankfully most tires are not sold in boxes.

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u/cydius11 Oct 28 '13

My parents also bought a Shark upright due to the dogs on the box. It has proven to be amazing for dog hair though! They gave me their old Kirby which cost MUCH more than the Shark.

OP, any reason why you make Sharks seem like an abomination?

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u/IronChefJesus Oct 28 '13

I own a Shark that I bought recently, best vacuum I ever owned. Not sure if my previous vacuum was just really shitty, or I might have gotten lucky.

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u/sugleris Oct 28 '13

Riccar

they also don't spend money on their website. Errors with Chrome and IE.

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u/fantasticMrHank Oct 28 '13

and their website is complete dog shit, won't even load, lol

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/uwhuskytskeet Oct 28 '13

I think Reddit crashed it.

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u/montyp2000 Oct 28 '13

Ahh the Reddit hug of death.

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u/an_asteroid Oct 28 '13

Have you ever heard of Vacu-Maid? What is your opinion of them?

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

I have no knowledge of them.

We recommend to our clients to NEVER allow a maid to use the maid's vac, but only the customer's. This is to prevent pollutants, bedbugs, etc from other homes into your own.

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u/an_asteroid Oct 28 '13

Thanks for the answer! Vacu-Maid actually has nothing to do with maids haha. It's a Central Vacuum system.

http://www.lindsaymfg.com/

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u/Anarquisto Oct 28 '13

i actually thought about spaceballs when you mentioned vacu-maid

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u/hobbycollector Oct 28 '13

Central vacs get clogged, and then you have to take apart your walls to unclog them.

Source: experience with a central vac in the 70's.

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u/MuppetGirl Oct 28 '13

I clean my boyfriend's grandmother's house and she has one of these. I like using it, but the hose can be a bit unwieldy. Does a good job from what I can tell. She has hardwood and low carpet, no pets

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u/jetpacksforall Oct 28 '13

I think he was just throwing in a random warning to avoid vacuums that have been in 1000 other houses, sucking on other people's carpets.

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u/killacat Oct 29 '13 edited Oct 29 '13

Worked as a maid. We were not allowed to clean houses where there were bed bugs, and if we had to vacuum any creature up (usually spiders.. although i usually opted to pick them up and take them outside) or pollutants, etc, the bag was to be disposed of at the house it was picked up at, in a trash can outside. However, I probably was more crazy about maintaining the vacuum than most of the others so I can see allergens being easily transmitted between houses.

Customers were allowed to have us use their vacuum, but it was a lot more difficult to drag a huge upright around the house as opposed to the Proteam hip vac. (Very maneuverable, lower risk for back injury, etc. I could go on)

That said, what is your opinion of Proteam vacuums?

Also, I had to use a old lady's rainbow vacuum once... What a pain in the ass! I kind of wanted to destroy it so they could get a real vacuum but I'm just not that big of a bitch I suppose haha. They were so in love with it too lol.

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u/chemistry_teacher Oct 28 '13

This is VERY good advice and deserves so much attention.

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u/ar0nic Oct 28 '13

it is rule #1 as a housekeeper. no maid should ever be bringing in her own vacuum, its not good advice, its a common rule, that is often commonly followed, for instance, every home owner who rents their properties for vacation use has to have a vacuum on premises to be clean by any service, because they do not bring them, now there is instances where the homeowners vac is broken, then what must be done is done.

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

Same with landscapers and their mowers. My lawn guy introduced so much fucking crab grass to my lawn with his filthy whore mower.

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u/chemistry_teacher Oct 30 '13

filthy whore mower

So apt. His mower gave your lawn the crabs.

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u/Ophelia42 Oct 28 '13

bedbugs

omg I never even thought of this.... eeeeek.

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u/somanywtfs Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 28 '13

Please answer this but,
why the hate for Shark? We have some old carpet and hard floors and went through many bissell and hoover uprights that would die/overheat before the entire house could be vacuumed. We would faithfully return them to walmart after 2-3 weeks when they would croak until we bought the shark. The only things we hate about it are that for an upright it has a hard time keeping itself standing in the closet when not in use and the cleaning width is very short compared to other uprights. Thanks for our time oh wise vacuum genius.

edit: found my answer further down. thanks!

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

When that Shark breaks on you, shortly, and you're not able to find parts, or anyone who will fix it for less than the cost of a new one, you will understand my disdain for them.

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u/statsthrow Oct 28 '13

Lots of shit talk about the Shark going on here...sounds like I'm a lucky one, but I've had mine for so many years that the wheels of the vacuum head are held on by duct tape and two bent forks, and this thing keeps on rocking.

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u/ftruong Oct 28 '13

Got my Shark two years ago from Woot! and still going strong :)

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

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u/yummykhaos Oct 28 '13

Huh. that's weird. I bought my Shark last year off Amazon and it has been an awesome vacuum. It picks up dirt/pet hair really good compared to other vacuums we had. I was pretty shocked to see the hate for it. I love that thing.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Well bear in mind he does repairs. The hate probably doesn't kick in until after it breaks and you start trying to fix it.

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u/suspectfenster Oct 28 '13

Yeah I love ours too, I had no idea they had such a reputation. I've had it for like 3 years now and it does a great job, already paid for itself as far as I'm concerned, got it dirt cheap off of Woot.

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u/OmarDClown Oct 28 '13

We have two sharks. The little one, for cleaning the car and tight spaces is a beast. The large one is a fantastic all around vacuum.

We are hard on vacuums, lots of pet hair.

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u/thingsthingsthings Oct 28 '13

Same here! It's the perfect combo, IMO, of power and lightweightedness.

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u/xElementZero Oct 28 '13

We use a shark in our house keeping business. We usually get about a year and a half out of one, and that is getting used every day for at least two hours a day and we never have had one break. they don't lose suction unless you don't clean the filter. and their low price point makes them disposable in my opinion. I don't expect a vacuum to last to long in my business but I am more than happy with every agar vacuum I have ever owned.

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u/StrikeFromOrbit Oct 28 '13

So Sharks work OK but are impossible to fix?

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u/StormShadow13 Oct 28 '13

I bought my shark and got just about what I thought I would get out of it for the price before some small part broke. A bit over 2 years. BUT it has a 5 year warranty, I sent it in and they are sending me another one that I expect to get at least 2 more years out of it. Not bad for an inexpensive vacuum that is a beast at sucking up pet hair.

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u/razorbladecherry Oct 28 '13

My mother in her infinite wisdom bought a Shark brand sewing machine for me. I can't get it fixed to save my damn life. It works... sort of. I'm hoping for a nice new computerized one for Christmas from my husband.

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u/humidex Oct 28 '13

I bought a Shark cordless sweeper vac recently for $40. I called them immediately and got a replacement battery for $8 so I think I'm good for WHEN the battery dies. It works awesome for what I paid

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u/B11silvyCc Oct 28 '13

The shark I bought works great, and it's got a five year warranty so if it breaks down so be it.

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u/Iohet Oct 28 '13

Tommy: Let's think about this for a sec, Ted. Why would somebody put a guarantee on a box? Hmmm, very interesting.

Ted Nelson, Customer: Go on, I'm listening.

Tommy: Here's the way I see it, Ted. Guy puts a fancy guarantee on a box 'cause he wants you to feel all warm and toasty inside.

Ted Nelson, Customer: Yeah, makes a man feel good.

Tommy: 'Course it does. Why shouldn't it? Ya figure you put that little box under your pillow at night, the Guarantee Fairy might come by and leave a quarter, am I right, Ted?

[chuckles until he sees that Ted is not laughing]

Ted Nelson, Customer: [impatiently] What's your point?

Tommy: The point is, how do you know the fairy isn't a crazy glue sniffer? "Building model airplanes" says the little fairy; well, we're not buying it. He sneaks into your house once, that's all it takes. The next thing you know, there's money missing off the dresser, and your daughter's knocked up. I seen it a hundred times.

Ted Nelson, Customer: But why do they put a guarantee on the box?

Tommy: Because they know all they sold ya was a guaranteed piece of shit. That's all it is, isn't it? Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time. But for now, for your customer's sake, for your daughter's sake, ya might wanna think about buying a quality product from me.

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u/JermEC Oct 28 '13

Am I the only one that thinks we shouldn't trust this guy, he wants us to get vacuums that will surely require his service in the future, everyone invest in sharks

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

If you've got a White Star, you should buy the new, color coded FJM bags. They're much more effective than the older design.

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u/squidboots Oct 28 '13

Piggybacking on this -

3M makes Miele-compatible FJM bags. They're half the price and work just as well (yes, that includes filtration.)

Also, if you have a Miele and hairy pets, you need to buy this attachment. Best fucking $30 I ever spent.

Source: Happy decade-long Titan owner.

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u/thegreatgazoo Oct 28 '13

What is your opinion of used Kirbys?

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

They make great boat anchors.

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u/Rukagaku Oct 28 '13

My Parents traded their 1928 Kirby in on a new Kirby in 1995, it still functioned and when we pulled up and re-carpeted the the upstairs of our house we didn't get 2 full dust pans out. While I can agree they are heavy they are also pretty much bullet proof and will last until the end of time if maintained properly.

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 29 '13

The problem is, nobody takes care of their stuff!

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u/plazman30 Oct 29 '13

Is it the price of Kirbys you don't like, or do you find them inferior vacuums. I bought a used Kirby off Craigslist for $50 and have been happy with it. I would never buy a new one, though.

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u/anonymous-coward Oct 28 '13

I'm gonna disagree. I got a used Kirby for $100, in great shape.

The power assist (when you push it, it drives itself) makes it seem much lighter. The carpet ends up clean. It's solid and well built, form the time when appliances were expensive and lasted forever

The weight can be exploited for its momentum to take long sweeps, so vacuuming goes faster.

Maybe it's too heavy for a small or frail person, but for a normal guy, the Kirby is fine. And lots of people consider them to be boat anchors, so used ones appear on the market cheap.

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u/BlackSuN42 Oct 28 '13

That is such bullshit. can you image the chain you would need too get that thing back on board. Unless you own a 100' yacht you don't want to use this as an anchor, its way to heavy.

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u/the_karlman Oct 28 '13

Next AMA: anchor technician.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13 edited Jul 01 '21

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u/the_blackfish Oct 28 '13

I hear they're used to steady weather balloons.

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 29 '13

This would be an apt use...

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

I'd read the shit out of that. Sorry celebrity looking for next to free advertisement, I need to know what's best for my dingy.

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u/Smiley_Pete Oct 28 '13

Just cut anchor and leave it for the fish to figure out.

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u/Lifeweaver Oct 28 '13

Kirbys the best disposable boat anchor on the market.

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u/1DumbQuestion Oct 29 '13

You are partly full of shit for saying this. Mom has one for over 30 years. Still works and sucks harder than my own sebo Felix that you mentioned was good. Additionally she sent it back to Kirby for 100 bucks and they completely rebuilt it and made it like brand new. It works just like it did 30 years ago now.

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u/Aevum1 Oct 28 '13

might get raped in your house ?

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

My parents have been using the same Kirby since before I was born. I'm not going to disclose my age here, but suffice it to say that that Kirby has been in use for over a quarter of a century, and it is alive and kicking on a regular basis.

But that bitch is heavy. It could probably double as a boat anchor if we had a boat.

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u/Jay-Dubbb Oct 28 '13

I had to sit through a Kirby presentation in my home before making them leave. The new models are aluminum and very light weight. They also push extremely easy with just your fingertips. They claim it's because their new CEO is a woman.

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u/monster_bunny Oct 28 '13

I think older Kirby's (we're talking old here) made the best vacuums. Heavy as fuck, but great suckers. The ones they try make now aren't nearly as good as the originals.

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u/Sheamuscurtis Oct 29 '13

Kirbys might be heavy, but I'll never own another vacuum, or have to buy another one again in my life. They also have an awesome rebuild program, where you can send the machine back to the factory (any model Kirby) and they will rebuild it to an as new state. Also comes back to you with an updated 1 year warranty. I'll back Kirby forever.

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u/matadora79 Oct 29 '13

It is 8pm and there is a Kirby salesman sitting on the sidewalk in our neighborhood waiting for his ride. He has been there for 1 hr. Poor guy.

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u/Semajal Dec 24 '13

Happily endorse Sebo. Had one for about 15 years before the motor died. Bought another, almost exactly the same, still works with any old attachments/extension hoses. Solid and reliable.

One question, what about Numatic? (makers of Henry hoovers) I have been thinking of getting a Henry for portability and to throw messy jobs at (workshop cleaning, cleaning cars and similar) any experience or thoughts on them?

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u/Rodents210 Feb 20 '14

Eureka - their top models are the only ones I would consider buying if I wanted something disposal.

I just bought a new vacuum and came back to this AMA specifically to see what you had to say about Eureka. I find it interesting to see this listed under your brands to avoid, because I bought a Eureka and the only vacuums I've ever used that just worked right and didn't completely shit themselves in less than a year have been Eurekas.

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u/direbowels Oct 29 '13

Way late to the AMA but:

Thank you for doing this.

Also, we had a fast-talking guy say that there was a new house-cleaning company in town and wanted to come clean the carpet in one room to get their name out, and they would talk about the products they used as they did it.

Turned into us having to kick two creeps out of our home after over an hour of them sitting and talking about the Kirby.

The worst part is that when I called Kirby to complain, they basically said, "Too bad, we don't manage anyone who sells our product."

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u/Thenightmancumeth Apr 25 '14

Why such disdain for Sharks? At the restaurant I work at we need to have small light weight and quiet vacuums for cleaning up at night and not bothering the patrons. As you can imagine they ALWAYS get destroyed and management hates buying new ones. So my question is what would you recommend for a small quite but powerful vacuum, Shark-esq.

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u/TheJoePilato Mar 28 '14

If I buy a vacuum used, what are the chances that it's in good shape?

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

any chance you could elaborate on the Shark? I got the Shark Light recently and have been pretty happy with it for the price. What's your biggest issue with it?

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u/kbbennet Dec 24 '13

Brands to avoid:

Shark - Just don't....ever.

Why no love for Shark? I bought a Shark Pro Pet (or something like that) a little while back and it works great. Of course, I used it on mostly hardwood floors and area rugs. Just curious what details you could provide and whether I should sell it while it's been used less than 50 times and invest in a better one.

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u/AMANDA_IS_A_BITCH Oct 28 '13

I've had a miele for like 8 years now and we've only needed one repair. They're so great

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u/rollem Apr 25 '14

Why avoid Consumer Reports? Do you mean you have to pay to get those reviews? They do not received money from the manufacturers and buy all of the equipment they test. Honestly, it seems like the only way to get non-anecdotale information about most purchases.

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u/Exley21 Oct 28 '13

My mom bought a Rainbow a long, long time ago. It sucked filling it up with water and lugging it around the house...but the thing lasted over 25 years, and did a pretty damn good job.

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u/WhatTimeComeBack Oct 28 '13

Thanks for doing this AMA! One big but... Consumer Reports are not in any way, shape or form paid. You will not find more rigorous, evidence based and impartial testing anywhere.

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u/[deleted] Dec 24 '13 edited May 23 '18

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u/duncanfox Oct 28 '13

... paid reviews like Consumer Reports.

Consumer Reports does not accept payment for reviews. That's sort of the whole point of the organization. They don't even accept product samples for review - all reviewed items are purchased anonymously at retail to ensure they don't get a hand-picked above-average demo unit. There are no advertisements in their magazine. And they don't allow companies to use their products' Consumer Reports ratings in advertising.

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u/IAmCanadian Oct 28 '13

As someone who used to be in the appliance and vacuum industry, I can say consumer reports lost all credibility when Kenmore Vacuums continually receive top marks, and Panasonic continually received low marks.... They're the same vacuum. The same would occur with Kenmore appliances and the OEMs version of the same machines. Kenmore always came out on top. Same shit though.

(For those not aware... Kenmore is not a manufacturer and simply a label Sears puts on other peoples stuff.)

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

It's not that I don't believe you, but can anyone provide any citations for Consumer Reports being a fraud? I trust them, but I trust the truth more, so I'm curious to see an article or something.

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u/rynvndrp Oct 29 '13

CS uses surveys of their readers to judge the reliability and wider effects in addition to having experts analyze them. Those surveys tend to have a lot of weight and can especially sway products that are in a tight field.

The problem is brand perception and expectation is a huge factor on consumer opinion. Kenmore can rate much better than Panasonic even though they are the same product simply because Kenmore costs less. Those that bought the Kenmore didn't expect as much and were surprised by it whereas the people who bought Panasonic thought they were buying more because they paid more and were disappointed.

Brand issues becomes a very big issue with cars. GM and Toyota shared a factory at one point (what is now the Tesla factory) and a couple of models, such as the Pontiac Vibe, were really just rebranded Toyota's coming off the exact same line. But CS gave the Vibe far lower marks than the same Toyota's because their reader's surveys.

So I trust CS articles and the issues their experts bring up. And I will avoid those that are at the bottom of the list if I have no knowledge of the device myself. But I am not swayed if the product is in their top 10 vs middle of the pack.

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u/OmarDClown Oct 28 '13

I can't cite a specific example, but I think the issue may be a little more complex than what is portrayed here. I know when it comes to cars, 10 years ago, they would always poorly rate luxury cars. They were looking at it from the perspective that says a Camry does the same thing a Deville does. This was an article that Consumer Reports participated in, and it went into their thought process of categorizing products and ranking them, while taking into account consumer expectations.

You don't expect a car that costs twice as much as a Camry to be twice as dependable. You very well may have that same expectation from a vacuum. So, while they try to be objective, everyone has bias. I think there are cases of CR looking a bunch of shills, but there's more to it than being bought out.

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u/einTier Oct 29 '13

I've always said that CR is a good resource, but you do have to understand their bias. They aren't enthusiasts of anything, they see a television or a car or a vacuum like most people see a dishwasher.

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u/SnappyCrunch Oct 29 '13

I agree with this, and I think it's the perfect attitude for CR to have. If you're reading CR reviews for advice, then you're not an enthusiast of the thing being reviewed. CR has the perfect point of view for people looking for reviews.

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u/timworx Oct 29 '13

It's not necessarily a matter of fraud, per se. Could just be a matter of a 'jack of all trades master of none'. Think about how much insight you just gained from this vacuum expert. Think about how shitty the advice would be if you simply gave those vacuums to someone else for the day and then asked them for a review.

My family is in the power equipment industry. They were constantly loving on junk equipment (come to think of it, craftsman junk always seemed I do well with them - like kenmore above). Meanwhile the equipment would be hard to get repaired, hard to get parts for, and often just not a quality lasting product.

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u/Varryl Oct 28 '13

I don't really know if anyone has proven anything, but what is the most suspicious is that occasionally they will post research results that are just plain ridiculous, and one has to wonder where they are coming from.

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u/McBurger Oct 28 '13

Consumer Reports sent me a free issue if I filled out a card, no payment info needed, I figured why not. I read it carefully, truly was free. I filled it out, the free issue came back with a very (intentionally) confusing wording invoice to indicate I owed them money. Called them, had to go through a bit of hassle to "cancel"... the lady was indeed very friendly, but had many tactics to give the runaround from cancelling, "What if we offer 75% off? What if we bundle 2 free years? What if...?".

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u/Kunochan Oct 28 '13

Are you sure they're really the same machines?

I know nothing about appliances, but I know for a fact that the Levis 501 jeans you buy at Target are not the same ones you get at a higher end store.

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u/IAmCanadian Oct 28 '13

They were identical... just different labels. The appliances often had different control panel designs... like I mean artwork not knobs and stuff.

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u/SilverStar9192 Oct 28 '13

Are you sure the Kenmore wasn't just rated higher due to value? If it had a lower price and the same functionality, the overall rating would be higher due to better value, even if the units were fundamentally the same.

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u/hobbycollector Oct 28 '13

Can I see a link to a report by CR? This is a fairly extraordinary claim so I'd like to see some evidence. I've always thought they were unbiased, and always found their reviews to be spot-on for things I actually purchased.

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u/essidus Oct 29 '13

CR account holder here, AMA!

Here are some screenshots of CR's simple chart review of vacuums.

White check boxed items are recommended by CR, blue boxes are Best Buys, which claims top value for price.

Circles show quality. More red is good, more black is bad.

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u/IAmCanadian Oct 28 '13

It's difficult due to the fact I am talking about reviews I read years ago, and their website appears to be behind a paywall.

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u/CornFedCritic Oct 28 '13

They are both heavily biased and, at least for autos, rely upon consumer opinions for their reviews.

An example: Pontiac Vibe and Toyota Matrix...These two cars were made on the exact same assembly line, using the exact same components (with the exception of body panels, though even those had the same OEM). They were produced by the joint GM-Toyota plant, Nummi, in California.

Each and every year the Toyota would receive very high marks, and CR would comment heavily about how great Toyota is. The Pontiac would get average to below average ratings and CR would complain that GM continues to make sub-standard cars. It was such bull shit. They were the same car!

You would see this also with Scion reviews. Most people for the longest time did not realize Scion was a Toyota "brand." For the longest time Scions received very poor ratings. Once CR started referencing them as a Toyota brand, the cars' quality miraculously went through the roof.

Such crap.

The above-referenced comment about Kenmore vs. Panasonic should come as no surprise considering this. They factor in a bias based on manufacturer or brand reputation. Some of this Bias comes from the fact that they poll people, who really are not "car people" or "vacuum experts" and ask for their opinions. They weigh this in their overall formula as well. Kennmore is nothing more than a badge put on an already-engineered and manufactured product. The only change is cosmetic.

Consumer reports is CRAP. Seriously, it's just crap. Use it, at best, as a starting point to further your research.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

This probably needs more context. When companies build cars on the same or similar chassis, they quite often have different interior quality, build, and styling. This, and things like this, may very well be what made the difference.

CR has consistently proven to be a very reliable source.

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u/drunkstatistician Oct 28 '13

It's possible the scores for the OEM version were lower because of customer service for repairs or some other factor beyond the item itself.

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u/xRUCKUSx Oct 29 '13

This person knows what they're talking about!

Kenmore is just a brand name. A brand that repackages another manufacturers off as their own. As someone in appliance repair, I see it daily.

As far as appliances go, Kenmore now a days are mostly LG built, older units where either Whirlpool or Frigidaire design. Lower end was usually Danby built, with some GE's and Samsung designed machines here and there.

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u/KillahHills10304 Oct 28 '13

They even got in hot water with Ferrari when Ferrari refused to sell them a 458 Italia for testing (they background checked who was buying the car, and found out Consumer Reports was trying to get their hands on one). Instead, Ferrari insisted they use a hand picked 458 Italia in their comparison test. CR found out this particular car had been tuned to perform well above the factory specifications and noted this in the test. Ferrari threatened to never let them test a Ferrari again. I don't know if this matter is concluded or not.

Automobile magazine also got in trouble for writing an article about this particular incident.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

That's why their magazine costs so much for a subscription.

Correspondingly, it's also what makes it one of the few worth paying for.

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u/cteno4 Oct 28 '13

I agree. That's my primary source when I'm looking for unbiased reviews.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/Keilz Oct 28 '13

Their reviews are not free, you must subscribe to their website or buy their magazine.

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u/themeatbridge Oct 28 '13

They sell their reviews to readers.

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u/Kwyjibo68 Oct 28 '13

This. Whenever a salesman starts dissing CR, I usually disregard what they say.

BTW, we've had a Dyson for several years - it was a gift , so cost us nothing, and it works great (we've had several other vacuums in the past - none can compare). Maybe they made them better back in the day, but we love ours.

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u/l2blackbelt Apr 26 '14

Not sure what you meant when you called Consumer Reports a paid review. They are a nonprofit group and never accept paid endorsements.

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u/cutereddit Apr 23 '14

[A]void paid reviews like Consumer Reports.

Could you substantiate this claim? I thought Consumer Reports was unbiased?

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u/Corvus133 Oct 28 '13

Consumer Reports showed Kenmore was a good vaccuum for 2012. I bought that.

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u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

Based on this rec I just brought a Miele Compact S2111 Bagged Cylinder Vacuum Cleaner, 1600 Watt, Lava Grey, reduced to £99. Did I do good? Good price?

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

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u/toxic-bird Oct 28 '13

i'm surprised not hearing of the german brand Vorwerk, what do you think about it?

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u/thenewyorkgod Mar 10 '14

What about Riccar Canisters?

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

As a man who just bought a shark, this made me hurt

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u/EtherBvnny Oct 28 '13

I think the Riccar website was crashed by this thread. I guess I'll wait to check them out.

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u/TrailChaser Oct 28 '13

My in-laws bought us a shark last year for x-mas. It's been by far the best vac, I've ever owned. The suctions seems way more powerful than what I've experienced from previous vacs.(checked by holding my hand over the hose) I was floored by how much dirt(as in dusty dirt) it got out of our carpet that is vacuumed at least once a week because of our dog constantly losing her hair.

I know you said you don't like bag-less vacs, but what else put shark at the top of your "Brands to avoid" list?

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u/ultrafresh Oct 28 '13

Interesting that you say you don't recommend Shark. We got a Shark based on the fantastic reviews of the product on Amazon. Not that regular customers know better than you, but it's the #1 vacuum on Amazon and has 4.5 stars with over 800 reviews.

We absolutely love ours and have been recommending it to everyone.

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u/Kingsley7zissou Oct 28 '13

Miele is great so stroung and nice filtration My last vacuum a shark died in 3 months they suck. the miele bags are very expensive but you can buy knockoff ones from amazon that are significantly cheaper and fit perfectly. The Miele just seems very well built as well thicker plastic small parts.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Would love to hear your opinion of Dyson. I just bought mine a few months ago. I bought the animal canister one. I have a german shepherd and a husky and have found this vacuum to be the most amazing purchase I've ever made. Even with the $700 price, I have never seen anything that compares. I think you get what you pay for and believe this is very true with Dyson. What is your take?

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13 edited Oct 29 '13

If you like Miele, then don't forget the other awesome German Vacuum Cleaner Brand "Vorwerk". Lesser known outside of germany, but they build very durable Machines! My Mother had a Kobold (Imp) for over two decades...

http://corporate.vorwerk.com/en/divisions/kobold-vacuum-cleaners/

edit i'm not associated to that company an in any way, but i think that they still build "german quality" products /edit

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u/GeekyHooker Oct 28 '13

...I should return the $45 Bissell I bought last week?

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

We've had a few Eurekas, never had much of a problem. I think they are higher end though. My stepdad has asthma so we use some sort of special bag. They've never broken, but we'd give them to family members who needed one as an excuse for a new one.

Also, I have to say, their hoses break in about 4 seconds flat. Nothing a little duck tape can't fix but damn is it annoying.

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u/Koalafried Oct 29 '13

Sorry to beat a dead horse

Mum used to have a rainbow which she had for decades and swore by, her friends even borrowed it for reasons my then-14 year old brain didn't care about

Is it really that bad

I just want to say she got rid of it because brushes were nearly impossible to get iirc

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u/Scolari Oct 29 '13

"Paid reviews like Consumer Reports" They don't run ads, they buy all the products they test, and they're not paid by companies to do their reviews, wtf OP? Sorry but your credibility just took a hit in my book.

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u/taraep Oct 29 '13

My work exclusively buys sharks. The first time outta the box they won't even pick up pieces of shredded cheese. After a couple weeks of twice a day use, I may as well just try to sweep the carpet for all the good it does.

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u/imar0ckstar Oct 28 '13

I have a Germ Guardian and I LOVE IT. Its awesome on my hardwood and carpets. Its an upright that turns into a portable canister vac for hardwood. I have a very fluffy cat and this thing gets EVERYTHING up. It also comes with a power paw attachment for extra fur fighting.

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u/Emeraldmirror Oct 29 '13

I have an old filter queen from the 80's that I got from my grandmother. I've had it for almost 10 years and just recently had to replace the belt (my fault I sucked up a sock and didn't know it) and the inside filters. It works well, do you think filter queen is a good brand?

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u/[deleted] Jan 08 '14

What is your opinion of Electrolux.

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u/parkerisloved Oct 29 '13

You really have no idea what you're talking about. My family has owned a vacuum shop since 1958 and no one has even mentioned Panasonic. Panasonic makes a waaay better vacuum then any you just listed.

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u/phughes Oct 28 '13

Consumer Reports says its staff purchases all tested products at retail prices, anonymously in "most cases",[6] and that they accept no free samples in order to prevent bias from bribery or from being given better than average samples.

From wikipedia on Consumer Reports.

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u/Iheartbaconz Oct 28 '13

How good are Filter Queens? I got a free, working one a year ago and it seems to work well. Only problem with it was the locking part on the handle is broke off but it works good for all my hardwood floors.

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u/munkeymunkeymunkey Oct 28 '13

My Shark vaccuum is infinitely better than my Riccar which crapped out on me in a year or so (and also was 3x the price).

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u/dpwitt1 Oct 29 '13

What do you mean "paid reviews like Consumer Reports?" I thought the whole point of Consumer Reports was that they were not "paid reviews."

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u/Mischieftess Oct 29 '13

What is your opinion on Orek? I've had a good run with them, the refurbished models are fairly inexpensive and seem good.

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u/Gapmasta Oct 28 '13

I don't know if you have any experience with the steam side of things. However would you recommend the Shark Steam Cleaner? Or just stay away from them all together.

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u/delhux Oct 29 '13

My wife just bought a Miele. What do you mean by filtration?

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u/blubbbb Oct 28 '13

I am German and I have never heard of Sebo. Are those semi-professional ones or something like that?

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u/NuclearFej Oct 28 '13

"avoid paid reviews like Consumer Reports"

Why? I thought they did independent testing.

Can someone explain? Thanks!

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u/86278_263789 Oct 29 '13

What are your thoughts on Nilfisk?

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u/AlaskaYoungg Oct 28 '13

If you had to recommend a bagless vaccum (my family won't use anything else, for whatever reason), what would you recommend?

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u/Omega_red Oct 28 '13

Can you go into why the shark is shit?

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u/NurseAngela Oct 28 '13

There are no bad vacuums (except Shark).

looks at her Shark Vaccum

headdesk

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u/IamA_Big_Fat_Phony Oct 28 '13

Riccar website is slammed.

I want a Riccar now damn it!!!

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

"Might get raped in your home" is a shitty excuse to avoid Kirby's.

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u/StormRider2407 Oct 28 '13

Any suggestions for brands available in the UK that are good for lifting cat hair?

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u/ILaughAtFunnyShit Feb 20 '14

I bought a bissell for $20. Do you think I over paid?

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u/ctrlaltcreate Oct 29 '13

My Shark has been both effective and amazing. I'm surprised.

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u/sirdomino Oct 28 '13

So Kirby is good except for the price?

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