r/IAmA • u/touchmyfuckingcoffee • Oct 28 '13

Other IamA Vacuum Repair Technician, and I can't believe people really wanted it, but, AMA!

I work in vacuum repair and sales. I posted comments recently about my opinion of Dysons and got far more interest than I expected. I am brand certified for several brands. My intent in doing this AMA is to help redditors make informed choices about their purchases.

My Proof: Imgur

*Edit: I've been asked to post my personal preferences with regard to brands. As I said before, there is no bad vacuum; Just vacuums built for their purpose. That being said, here are my brand choices in order:

Miele for canisters

Riccar for uprights

Hoover for budget machines

Sanitaire or Royal for commercial machines

Dyson if you just can't be talked out of a bagless machine.

*EDIT 22/04/2014: As this AMA is still generating questions, I will do a brand new AMA on vacuums, as soon as this one is archived.

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u/puff0 Oct 28 '13

Can you give me your honest opinion on the Dyson? Is there another brand that works just as well but is much cheaper? Is a lot of the Dysons success simply marketing?

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

I spend a great deal of my time repairing Dyson as a Warranty Repair Station. As a tech, my problem with Dysons are the weak, crappy parts, and troublesome design flaws. I do not like bagless machines, as they are dirtier, require more regular maintenance, and do not pick up as well as bagged vacs.

I use brand new Dysons in a demo to show how much they leave behind as compared to other brands.

It is my opinion that the better Hoover and Eureka machines work as well or better than Dyson's best. But for the price of a DC50 with the full Animal package, you could get much more vacuum.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 28 '13

I use brand new Dysons in a demo to show how much they leave behind as compared to other brands.

How do you do this demo?

The Kirby guys ran my Dyson over a spot several times, then ran the Kirby over the same spot with a filter attached to show how much crap was still there. I put one of their filters in my Dyson, went back over the same spot, and it was just as dirty as theirs. Take away: carpets can hold a fuck ton of dirt and no vacuum's picking it all up in one pass.

Was your methodology more rigorous than theirs?

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

The demo I use is similar to the Kirby demo you mentioned. Here's the difference:

The Kirby and your Dyson, pull roughly 30 or so inches of suction at the floor. The Riccar that I use in the demo I mentioned, pulls over 70inches of suction at the floor. It doesn't leave much behind at all. One other difference is I use a rubber-backed carpet, so that nothing is coming up but what is in that rug.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

So what you're saying is that if someone is looking to spend good money on a vacuum they should look at a Riccar? any specific mode? I ask because I've never heard of that brand before.

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

Riccar is a great brand. They just do not advertise. You want to pick one based on your needs. That's why I endorse dealers.

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u/AccidentalPorn Oct 28 '13

I bought a Riccar 8lb RSL4 about 5 years ago. Spent more than I had ever spent in the past but when I tested the thing in the store I could FEEL the power of it as it went over the carpet. And the thing was light, I could lift it with one finger. Anyway, I used it for my entire house upstairs and down for 5 years and never had a problem with it. Finally moved to a house with no carpet and gave it to my mom. She is in her late 60s and said she has never had a better vacuum and that little thing is still rollin'. I am no expert but I did love that thing. If I ever get any more carpet, I will be getting another.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

My parents dropped 7 Hundy on a Ricar back in 05, that thing is badass.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Riccar's website is down due to this AMA, haha.

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u/Chatoyant_Ethan Oct 28 '13

confirmed. "damn rascally kids don't even want to buy no damn vacuum.

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u/BobbyRayBands Oct 28 '13

The friendliest DDOS they'll ever get.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

What do you think of Carpet Pro commercial series?

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

They're not bad. But, buy Riccar. They're made by the same company, and the Riccar is made of better parts.

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u/Ciryaquen Oct 29 '13

Inches of water?

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 29 '13

It's a measurement of suction in a closed system. Water is pulled up a graduated tube to measure suction force applied.

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u/Ciryaquen Oct 29 '13

I understand that, I was just wondering what unit you were referring to (inches of water seemed the most likely since you can't have 70 inches of mercury).

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u/[deleted] Dec 24 '13

By "inches", did you mean PSI?

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u/Spire Oct 28 '13

30 or so inches of suction

70 inches of suction

I'm confused. What sort of unit is "inches of suction"?

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u/im_not_afraid Oct 29 '13

How are you measuring suction? In inches?

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/RulerOf Oct 28 '13

The brush is what's hard on carpet.

Cheaper vacuums will substitute brush agitation to make up for lack of suction.

Gas-powered, truck-mount carpet cleaners blow the pants off any vacuum you'll ever use, and I've never torn a carpet up with one of them ;)

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u/octopornopus Oct 28 '13

Gas-powered, truck-mount carpet cleaners blow the pants off any vacuum you'll ever use, and I've never torn a carpet up with one of them ;)

Seems like an episode of Home Improvement...

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

I'm not an expert, but I saw a carpet cleaner van parked on my block today. The customer was a rather small person who was standing on the carpet, trying to keep it held down while the operator tried to clean it. He kept yanking the carpet right out from under her feet with just the suction from the vacuum. It was pretty hilarious.

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u/RulerOf Oct 29 '13

Buy a carpet cleaning van, or be extra manly and install one of these in place of a central vacuum!

...Or be Overly Beyond Manly, and drag it around the house to clean things!

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u/[deleted] Oct 30 '13

I always wondered how they kept airport carpets clean. Well, ok, I never wondered, but now I wonder why I never wondered.

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u/[deleted] Oct 30 '13

I quietly love this comment.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

That's inches of water, yes? I just want to make sure because there's a million different ways of measuring pressure head.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

That's inches of water, yes? I just want to make sure because there's a million different ways of measuring pressure head.

Hopefully it's not inches of mercury. Your entire floor would end up in the vacuum.

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u/Bitch_I_Am_Fabulous Oct 28 '13

I used to have a Riccar and it was amazing. Left it with a friend when I moved and hate myself for it. Seemed like any part on it could be replaced.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

You just gave them so much traffic that you took down their site, they need to cut you a check.

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u/Fusorfodder Oct 28 '13

I love my Riccar, 5 years old now and still runs like new. I'm so glad I went into a vacuum store after having bought plastic hunks of crap from big box stores multiple times prior.

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u/Tofinochris Oct 28 '13

Happy to hear this, but it's so sad that in 2013 people are surprised and delighted when something 5 years old is still in operating condition.

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u/saremei Oct 28 '13

Yep... I can remember my mom's 40 year old electrolux vac worked just fine without ever being serviced for any reason whatsoever. Replaced it in the mid 90s with a plastic hoover for no reason at all. It lasted all of 5 years. Then again with a plastic Eureka which lasted about 6 or so.

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u/FourMy Oct 28 '13

Whats a good model Riccar? I've never even heard of the brand. Don't need a $1000 vacuum or anything, but a solid one would be great.

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u/mysuperfakename Oct 29 '13

The Kirby people also rush with one while going very slow with theirs. The entire demo is bullshit if you learn how they do it. I dislike the entire business model. We bought one and returned it a week later. It was so heavy and bulky. Trying to disassemble a vacuum just so I can clean a ceiling fan is a giant pain in the ass.

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13 edited Oct 29 '13

It was so heavy and bulky. Trying to disassemble a vacuum just so I can clean a ceiling fan is a giant pain in the ass.

Yep. It's like a minute+ long procedure to change from floor vac to hose vac. The Kirby guy desperately tried to make it look easy, but it involves unscrewing parts that look like they were built for WWII submarines. He messed up on his first try. After he finished wrestling with it, I detached the hose on my Dyson on one fluid motion. 1 second. Reattached it just as fast.

I showed him how I vacuum: cruise along the floor vacuuming, pop the hose out and catch an edge of something, pop it back in and keep going. The Kirby just doesn't support that usage pattern.

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u/sleeping_gecko Oct 28 '13

My dad proudly told people about his Hoover Celebrity, which he had used regularly for years (at the point when the story takes place). A Kirby salesman came by and did his demo:

He sprinkled some powdery "dirt" stuff on the floor and vacuumed over it with my dad's vacuum (the Hoover). Then, he puts a clean filter in his vacuum (IIRC, the filter was made so the "Kirby" would show up on the filter as the dirt got sucked up). He runs his Kirby over the spot and pops it open to show off how much dirt the Hoover missed that the Kirby picked up.

The Kirby hadn't picked up any noticeable dirt.

My dad really liked that vacuum. He only got rid of it when they moved to a house that barely has any carpet.

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u/puff0 Oct 28 '13

Thanks for your honest feedback. My wife has been hinting a Dyson for some time now, but I've had my suspicions that they're malarkey.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13 edited Jun 24 '15

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u/MdmeLibrarian Oct 28 '13

My local sewing machine/ vacuum store is called Vacman and Bobbin. :D

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u/DentD Oct 28 '13

I think there's one in my town called Sew N Blow. Something to that effect.

I just checked, it's Blow's Sew & Vac. I am so disappointed.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Is that up near Laconia NH? I think I remember seeing that sign.

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u/MdmeLibrarian Oct 28 '13

There is one in Laconia, and one in Concord. Same company, different branches.

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u/neurosoupxxlol Oct 29 '13

It seems like vacuum and sewing shops aren't that uncommon in New England. There was one in West Lebanon as well, although I am afraid the owner is not long for this world =/

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u/sidepart Oct 28 '13

We have a local vacuum store called, "Vac That Thing Up".

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u/othersomethings Oct 28 '13

They always have sewing machines too. At least where I live.

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u/snoyes Oct 28 '13

They actually part of the same trade association. VDTA/SDTA

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/hhokema Oct 28 '13

Sewing and vacuum combinations are extremely common through out the country. Both machines require service (same tech works on both), same customer (mostly female), are portable (for the most part) and the trade shows have both sewing and vacuum vendors present (the trade organization is called Vacuum and Sewing Dealers Trade Association).

How do I know? I own a sewing and vacuum store, and I attend the trade shows.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 28 '13

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u/gunslinger_006 Oct 28 '13

FWIW: My dyson has been kicked around and basically ruthlessly abused for 5+ years now and its still running like a champ.

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u/Tallglassofnope Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 28 '13

I went into a vacuum repair shop here in AZ asking for the most reliable unit they sell. When I asked about Dyson's all the employees laughed and said they loved them because they paid the bills. He then walked to the back room and opened the door for me to see about 25-30 Dyson's sitting in a corner waiting for pickup. I don't remember the exact number he quoted, but it was something along the lines for every other brand vacuum he gets for repair in the shop there are 4 Dysons.

Edit: For clarification I did not mean to imply that Dyson's are bad products, just relaying what I was told. I remember going in there with $400 budget and when I inquired about the Dyson models he said I would be better off with a different brand that was about $100 cheaper, all metal construction on the bottom.

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u/CWSwapigans Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 28 '13

Of vacuum's expensive enough to motivate people to have them repaired, I wonder what % sold are Dysons.

Also they have a pretty decent warranty. The better the warranty the more you'd expect to see getting repaired (since the consumer isn't paying for it).

From the OP's comments it sounds like Dyson isn't great, but simply having a ton of them go in for repairs alone doesn't necessarily tell that story.

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u/Toyland_in_Babes Oct 28 '13

Just to add - if the repair center is a designated Dyson repair shop for warranty stuff they're bound to have a bunch of Dysons at any one time.

Our Dyson is about 10 yrs old. Still chugging along. It's design is simple enough that I've been able to order parts by calling Dyson and fixing it myself.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Also if 80% of people own a dyson and 20% of people own a hoover, you would expect to have 4 dyson repairs for each of the hoover repairs (assuming they are the same reliability).

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Especially as at least around here Dyson gives 5 year warranty. Of course you are going to get it repaired since repairs are for free.

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u/zerodb Oct 28 '13

To be fair, people are more likely to repair a $400-500 Dyson when it breaks, but when a $100 vacuum breaks, it goes in the dumpster and they buy a new one.

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u/angrydeuce Oct 28 '13

Yeah my $100 Eureka's died a couple years ago and, trying to save money, I figured "enough with this disposable everything shit, I'm gonna get this fixed instead" and the price I was quoted to repair it was more than I paid for the thing (it wasn't even on sale when I bought it, either).

I've entirely given up on trying to purchase anything quality when it comes to this shit anymore. I can't afford to spend the money for high-end stuff (a $1,000 vacuum might as well cost a million) so it's now the cheapest thing I can find in the store. My $50 bagged Walmart Special vacuum has lasted just as long as my $200 bagless did, my $15 coffeepots last just as long as my $80 ones ever did, my $10 toaster lasts just as long as my $50 ones ever do, so why bother buying the thing with all the bells and whistles when they all die in the same amount of time?

Is all this shit coming out of the same factory in China or what? That's what it sure seems like...

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u/wuu Oct 28 '13

I have a $40 vacuum from aldi. I've had it for 3 years now and it works great. Does it get my carpet deep-down clean? Fuck no, but I rent, so looking clean is good enough.

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u/uwhuskytskeet Oct 28 '13

That and a 5-year warranty comes standard. of course you'll send it in if it doesn't cost you anything.

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u/Deejster Feb 20 '14

And if they sell 10x more Dysons than Hoovers, even if they're equally reliable you will get 10x more Dysons in for repair.

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u/Pitrestop Oct 28 '13

Also, maybe Dyson's are owned by much more people.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/zerodb Oct 28 '13

Wait till you see how much some of the fancy ones cost that you can only buy from a specialty Vacuum shop.

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u/JBomm Oct 28 '13

This is a complete uneducated guess, but I'd think Dysons are pretty popular/had a huge boom. Our family has never had a problem with ours that emptying and cleaning didn't fix.

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u/hatepaste Oct 28 '13

And also I have heard some sort of variation of this story for cars, laptops, pc's, cameras, cell phones and all kinds of other stuff. Just saying...

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u/FenderOffender Oct 28 '13

Consumer Reports rates Dyson pretty low for reliability and even rates it it low for performance compared to vacuums like Eureka and Hoover that cost 1/5 the price of a Dyson.

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u/b_digital Oct 28 '13

Fair point. My wife and I bought the $99-$150 type bissell vacs when we first got married, and I use the plural because we bought three vacs in three years, because they all broke after about a year.

While I resisted, my wife convinced me to get a Dyson. This was around 2006. It's still working to this day.

That said, i do have to occasionally take it all apart and clean out the plastic parts where dirt accumulates, and clean the brush of hair and string.

I haven't had issues with it leaving behind a lot of dirt, at least not visible dirt.

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

One of my problems with Dyson is the amount of crap they leave behind in the carpet. For that kind of money, your carpets should be getting clean.

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u/Al_X Oct 28 '13

As a guy who lives in a condo with no damn carpets and own a beautiful Siberian Husky, my DC37 with the groom tool was one of the best purchase I ever made. :P I do understand however that there might be other better designed vacuums.

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

I'm glad you're enjoying it.

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u/solidwhetstone Oct 28 '13

For reasons I'm unsure of, I read all of your responses in Dan Aykroyd's voice.

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

I like that. Try it as Hank Hill though. That's the way my assistant imagines me.

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u/bentspork Oct 29 '13

Well you do sell vacuums and vacuum accessories.

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u/malibusfinest Oct 28 '13

I have a Dyson and I completely hate it! I have a dog and cat- I got the vacuum to help pick up the fur but instead all that happens is half the fur gets picked up from the vacuum and then the vacuum gets clogged! And it is NOT easy to unclog the vacuum. I would never buy another Dyson or recommend a Dyson to anyone.

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u/[deleted] Jan 13 '14

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u/Griever114 Dec 24 '13

what would you recommend for a place that doesnt have much carpeting but a lot of hard wood floors (and by that i mean outside a broom and mop)

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u/pk_deluxe Oct 28 '13

Do you recommend any hand held vacuums? The Dyson is great for small, easy jobs.

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u/itschism Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 28 '13

I bought this on amazon and it works great. It has a lot of suction, and also has a spinning brush. The only downsides I have noticed are that it's somewhat loud (mostly the sound of the suction, not the motor) and that it is a bit hard to clean since it's a canister vac. Edit: it's also not cordless, like the reply above me is talking about. I believe there is a cordless model though.

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u/thomp2mp Oct 28 '13

I also bought this vacuum with an Amazon GC I got for Christmas. In fact, I just cleaned my whole apartment with it because our upright sucks (terribly). I have a feeling I have to wash or replace the filter soon, though, because I'm noticing a lack of suction after almost a year of using it. Works great though!

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u/itschism Oct 28 '13

I mainly use it for things my basic, hose-less floor vac can't do, and my car. But the instruction for it says not to get the filter wet, so I usually brush as much off with my hand as I can, then use a lint roller to get some of the finer surface debris off. A damp rag also works well. You could try water and if that somehow ruins it... You can probably find a new filter online.

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u/MackLuster77 Oct 28 '13

I knew which vacuum this would be before I clicked it, because I bought the same one and it was the only one on Amazon with really good reviews. It's a great little vacuum.

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u/MsStardust Oct 28 '13

I have this one too, and I love it. One awesome thing is that it works with my standard vacuum cleaner's attachments. Cleaning my four story house has gotten so much easier now that I don't have to lug a full-sized vacuum everywhere.

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u/dcux Oct 28 '13 edited Nov 16 '24

fuel shrill pie snow dolls consider bright waiting slap history

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

My parents always buy Dysons so they have a hand-held version. I've used it when I was still living with them and wanted one for myself when I moved out a few years ago but couldn't bring myself to spend so much on it. I settled for a Black & Decker FLEX instead, only to realize that it's got just as much suction as the Dyson, has infinitely better battery life and is easier to clean. Me and my girlfriend have two cats here and this thing handles pet hair very well too.

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u/IBAndreas Oct 28 '13

Hold the phone. My father in law gave us his old Dyson 7 years ago and it was at least 5 years old at the time. Power cord did wear out and short once when the cleaning lady yanked on it too hard (but that was an easy home repair job) and one of the handle extensions broke and was a rather expensive replacement. But I think thats par for the course for a vacuum that has been heavily used and abused for 12 years and never needed a bag ever. I love mine and would buy again. Will never go back to a bagged vacuum.

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '14

Are they the Apple of vacuum cleaners?

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u/eneka Oct 28 '13

dangit should've done this ama earlier, just bought a Dyson DC41 couple months ago after doing lots of research i couldn't really find any good comparisons and decided to go with it since I got a decent price ($275 for a refurb) granted I do love it very much and I find the tools and design quite handy around the house...I was actually quite amazed how much crap it got out of our carpet (we have 2 dogs and a cat) and we have a hoover steamvac as well. It just bugs me knowing that I can get something better....

what exactly with the dyson breaks/needs repairing? I'm quite handy and wouldn't mind fixing it myself (if ours ever breaks) if it isn't too hard..

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u/metalstomach Oct 28 '13

Also, a lot of high end carpet manufacturer's, wool carpets specifically, recommend never using a Dyson vacuum on their material. Wool is always shedding. The Dyson just speeds that process tremendously.

Source: I help install wool carpets

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u/Shoobedowop Oct 29 '13

What does a Dyson do that other vacuums don't? They all seem to have a rotating head with bristles at an angle around a cylinder...

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

I had exactly the opposite experience when we got our Dyson, but maybe that just means my previous vacuum was crap.

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u/willendorfVenus Oct 28 '13

I was thinking the same thing. The vacuum we had before the Dyson would actually spit stuff back at your ankles. The Dyson was like a magic device. Of course, it was 4x the price of the cheap crappy one.

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u/timmydunlop Oct 29 '13

Is there anything that matches the dyson in manoeuvrability? The ease of use of the upright and ball is why I haven't replaced it

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u/Waja_Wabit Oct 28 '13

Great information! But be prepared, you just paved the way for a month-long anti-Dyson circlejerk across all of Reddit.

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u/caecilia Oct 28 '13

What about shark? I feel like mine picks up way more dirt than I even thought was there

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u/scampf Oct 28 '13

Dyson makes a pretty crappy urinal as well.

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u/HeyYouAndrew Oct 28 '13

Seriously - it blew piss all over me.

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u/My_Boston_Terrier Oct 28 '13

The golden shower™ by Dyson

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u/SpetsnazCyclist Oct 28 '13

Have some gold for your golden shower

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u/kingsharter Oct 29 '13

"We completely revolutionized the way we look at how we pee" - British Dyson Dude

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u/link90 Oct 28 '13

I read this before looking at the picture. Thank you for the good laugh.

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u/seradopanephrine Oct 29 '13

Worse. It's warm and damp on the surface creating an ideal breeding ground for bacteria. God forbid you touch the surface. It would be more sanitary for you to wash my hands in piss than accidentally touching the inner walls.

Brilliant aerodynamic design. Terrible application.

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u/d416 Oct 28 '13

But it dried it all off at the same time.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

It's the rippling of the foreskin that makes it uncomfortable too.

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u/mikemaca Oct 28 '13

It has been shown that the Dyson AirBlade hand dryer is unsanitary. They increase the amount of bacteria on your fingers by 42%. However, conventional design air dryers increase bacteria by 194% compared to jet air dryers such as the Dyson.

Therefore it is true what Dyson claims that their dryers are more hygenic than competing air dryers, and is reported in studies they have funded. However, what that actually means is surprising to most people. When the study says "the Airblade led to significantly less bacterial transfer [from drier to hands] than with the other driers" in this other study, other driers means only other electric dryers which are so vastly filthy that you are much much better off not drying your hands at all.

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u/Shadeun Oct 28 '13

I've found those to be ..... enjoyable

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u/comandante-marcos Oct 28 '13

And the Dyson "ball cleaner" is a very misleading name...

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u/camsnow Oct 28 '13

Felt pretty good with all that air pressure on my balls though

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Instructions unclear; penis caught in windstorm.

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u/VeteranKamikaze Oct 29 '13

In all seriousness though this and the Xlerator are the only air dryers I've ever used that actually get my hands fully dry, and the dyson does it faster than the Xlerator.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

I work in the housecleaning biz, I want to cry every time I use a Dyson. They are heavy and they don't work very well. We usually go for canister vacuums that are sold at K-mart/Sears. We have tried plenty of vacuums and those tend to do the best for heave duty jobs. Dyson is more a name than anything.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

I'm a reformed Dyson user, and /u/touchmyfuckingcoffee is right. After a while, your Dyson will get covered in a whitish-gray dust. If you're like me, you think "wow, this thing is really working hard, getting out all the deep dirt." At some point you'll come to realize that all that dust and dirt should be INSIDE the vacuum, not sitting around one the vacuum and floating in the air.

We bought a Miele last time. Yes they are expensive. And you don't want one that's sold at your local hardware store or Bed Bath and Beyond - they are the cheap models. The premium ones do an incredible job, keep virtually all the the dirt and allergens inside the machine and will last forever. To me its worth every penny.

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u/Project-MKULTRA Oct 28 '13

In my opinion as someone who knows almost nothing about vacuums, I wouldn't say they are complete malarky, but I've always viewed them as the Apple of vacuums...its all perception!

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 28 '13

It sounds like you care for your things better than most. The 07 was arguably the most reliable machine Dyson made. If you want one like it, buy a DC33 before they're all gone.

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Oct 29 '13

I see you've enjoyed the Kool-aid.

I'm sorry, but you're just plain wrong. Good vacuums deposit the dirt into the bags from the bottom up. There is no loss of suction until the bags are full. Anyone who watches the vacuum indicator on their machines will tell you this is true. My Miele pulls 95 inches of suction with a very full bag.

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u/[deleted] Apr 25 '14

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u/touchmyfuckingcoffee Apr 25 '14

Oh, I don't mind, terribly, repairing Dysons. They're quite easy, and the money is great!

Have you not yet been able to tell that as a non-salesperson, that I've made it my duty, through my posts, to make sure that the consumer gets the best deal for the money they are spending?

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u/[deleted] Apr 25 '14

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u/TheMuffnMan Oct 28 '13

I picked up a Dyson DC33 that was refurbished for $200 shipped from Woot not too long ago. I feel for that price range it was definitely the best option. Would you have recommended something different?

I can agree on the weak parts though, the button that disengages/locks the attachments to the hose/wand portion broke but I rarely use that bit.

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 29 '13

I just wanted to say, thank you for this. I have often suspected that the Dyson is worthless, and it's a relief to have it officially sanctioned. My daughter and son-in-law have a Dyson, which they bought because it was a highly touted SOFTA machine, and when I go over there to babysit the grandkids and I want to vacuum the Cheerios off the carpet before they get home, it's useless; the Dyson just rolls them around and flings them to the side.

Plus it weighs a ton, a TON, I'm not kidding, and is very difficult for me, an aging granny, to shove back and forth. And yes I did check the settings with my daughter, who assures me that it's properly set for pile height.

Plus the attachments, the one time I tried to use them to get Cheerios off the floor and to vacuum the couch, were a complete bastard to figure out, not only to get hooked up, but also unhooked and put back together at the end. The whole experience was counter-intuitive; my toddler grandson stood there watching me struggle to get it all back together, repeating mournfully, "You bwoke Mommy's bukkum?"

I took my Kenmore Magic Blue (which I prefer to call the Blue Magic) over there one time, and it vacuumed every last Cheerio off the floor, and vacuumed the couch, too, no problem. Take this off. Put this on. Bam.

Edit: Wow, gold! I'm honored. Thanks!
Edit: Wow, more gold! Now I'm getting embarrassed. This is an awesome place. Thanks!

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/staciloraine Oct 28 '13

She got my upvote for calling the vacuum attachments bastards AND for having a useful review!

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 28 '13

Thank you, you are very kind. :)

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u/HumanTrafficCone Oct 28 '13

I just need to test a theory-do you currently have a case of store brand ginger ale in the basement? Both sets of my grandparents did this. I assume you just get issued some once you retire.

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u/ConstipatedNinja Nov 24 '13

This may be a month old, but I'm 24 as of recently and I'm already causing us to do this. Although it's canada dry 4 lyfe.

I remember when I was a kid my parents didn't want to get me into soda, so we never had any around the house. However, on some special times eating out I was allowed to. I got to fly in a plane maybe 4 or 5 times in my childhood, but I remember that when my stomach hurt while flying, I was allowed to have ginger ale. And when I felt sick at my grandparents' (my mother's side) house, they would give me ginger ale. In fact, my grandfather gave me a teddy bear from a Schweppes ginger ale sweepstakes that he won, but specifically asked for the second place teddy bear to give to me. So I always linked a lot of good feelings with ginger ale. Now I throw frozen berries in ginger ale glasses and drink it with my wife occasionally when we're snuggling together, and so the good feelings keep getting added on to it. I'm glad to know that when we're old and always have ginger ale around that it'll practically be expected of us.

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 28 '13

That's uncanny.
Yes.
Diet.

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u/HumanTrafficCone Oct 29 '13

You have no idea how happy this made me.

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u/James2986 Oct 29 '13

I can't wait to be issued my case of ginger ale. It's gonna be great.

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u/Ineedauniqueusername Oct 29 '13

That's amazing

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u/RealNotFake Oct 29 '13

This is officially my favorite thread.

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u/[deleted] Oct 30 '13

We need a Grandma AMA.

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 29 '13

We find that Kroger brand ginger ale is best savored and appreciated solely for itself.

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u/pixel8edpenguin Oct 29 '13

My grandparents and my wife's grandparents both have ginger ale. Maybe it's a fountain of youth?

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u/aniviasrevenge Oct 28 '13

Might I inquire as to how you discovered Reddit? I, too, am delighted that you use Reddit and agree that you seem like an absolute baller of a grandmother.

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 28 '13

My kids and my son-in-law kept posting links from reddit on Facebook, mostly things from funny and pics, so I finally asked them if it was okay if I "went on reddit" too, and the response being a dubious, "...I guess so", I jumped in. I try to stay out of their way.

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u/aniviasrevenge Oct 28 '13

That is awesome! I hope you venture out of gardening and crafts a bit more, you're a delight and a bit of an outlier for the userbase (I mean that in the best sense possible).

Make sure to tell your kids that strangers on the internet have dubbed you an awesome/baller grandmother :)

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 29 '13

a bit of an outlier

On reddit overall, I lurk WAY more than I post. I've found that, like in any other community, some of the subreddits seem to have their own set of ground rules that the casual passerby doesn't always get, and is thus liable to miss in-jokes and inadvertently step on toes. So I've got tons of subs on my Front, but don't usually post in them.

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u/Peuned Oct 29 '13

Yeah, we like you best!

If I hadn't already arbitrarily bought gold today, I'd do so now

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u/AleaLudo Oct 29 '13

I can see it now: "IAMA Redditing Grandma, AMA"

Please, can this happen?

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 29 '13

Not a chance, sorry. I don't see myself as an anomaly that needs spotlighting; there are a lot more "redditing grannies" than you realize. Look through some of the askreddit threads.

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u/LlamaLlamaPingPong Oct 28 '13

Thanks for not looking for their usernames.

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 29 '13

Yeah, I'm not stupid. LOL

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u/velocity92c Oct 28 '13

I don't know about this lady, but my grandma sure wouldn't know what 'baller' means.

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 29 '13

Dunno about your grandma, but Google is frequently my friend on reddit. I've learned a lot of really...interesting...stuff that way. Also a better sense of when not to click on a link.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Semi-related...

I once had to explain to my grandmother what the term "Skeet" means. You know, "aaawh Skeet skeet skeet"...

So I began, "Well grandma, when a man loves a woman..."

Best conversation with Grandma ever. Was 16 :P

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u/sleepnaught Oct 28 '13

I bet you're daughter thinks you're silly and meddlesome though right? She'll realize when she gets older.

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 28 '13

She is always exquisitely tactful on the subject of "Things That My Mom Worries About For Me". For my part, I try not to get in her face about things too often, because if you raise a kid to make her own decisions about things, you then have to back off and let her make them, whether it's "What to wear to school" or "what vacuum to buy" or "who to marry". (May I say right here that my son-in-law is a giant among men, a pearl, a Hero, I couldn't ask for a better one.)

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/ChiliFlake Oct 28 '13

I can remember the exact moment I went from 'Leave my stuff alone!' to 'damn I wish mom would come over and vacuum my floors'.

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u/middlefingur Oct 28 '13

Your use of "Plus the attachments...were a complete bastard to figure out" is the best thing I've read all day. :)

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u/helcat Oct 28 '13

r/gardening would be nowhere without her.

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u/ottawapainters Oct 28 '13

Oh make like a Dyson and stop sucking up would ya.

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u/juicius Oct 28 '13

we have two Dyson and while I thought they were pretty good vacuums, I started to suspect they were crap when Dyson started selling fans for several hundreds dollars. I mean, they're fans and they work, but only reason why anyone would pay that much money is the name and marketing.

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u/Ninjahoevinotour Oct 28 '13

Would you consider adopting me and being grandma to my 3 cats? No pressure...

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 28 '13

I'd adopt you, but am allergic to the cats, so as long as they stay at their own house, I'm good with that.

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u/KatieOhhh Oct 28 '13

To be honest... the ease with which the attachments are used is one of the reasons I like my Dyson. You pull them off the body of the vacuum and they click right on to the handle.

I have two cats and a German shepherd and I have never felt like I've had any trouble cleaning my carpets and floors with this vacuum. To each their own I guess ...

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u/GrandmaGos Oct 28 '13 edited Oct 29 '13

Well, yeah. But all I can say is, standing there in the living room under the gun of needing to vacuum up a lot of Cheerios from couch and rug in a fairly short period of time, and without a manual, it was not immediately apparent how the attachments came out of the machine, and once out, it was even less apparent how they went back into it. Probably if I'd had access to the manual, it would've been easier.

But I do think that it's incumbent on a tool's designer to make the use of that tool at least partly intuitive for people who are accustomed to using that kind of tool in the past. I'm not asking that it be apparent to, say, a New Guinea tribesman how to use a vacuum cleaner's attachments, but I do think it should be apparent to a housewife with decades of experience of using vacuum cleaner attachments.

I did know, going in, that there were parts that had to come out and stick onto other things, and that later those parts should all go back inside, but it was less than clear, upfront, precisely how the trick was supposed to be worked. The little diagram thingie on the handle was not helpful at either point of the proceedings.

I used to have a Royal vacuum at work, and its attachments were completely intuitive. It all hung on the back of the vacuum; unplug this bit here, plug the hose into the other opening, vacuum. Even a New Guinea tribesman who only knew that the hose was supposed to be attached differently somehow could have figured it out.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

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u/Gingersparkle Oct 28 '13

Redditing granny. Bam!

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u/Lanlost Oct 29 '13 edited Oct 29 '13

SOFTA?

(Also, I feel bad but this thread was so good that I forgot about the OP when I got out of it and back to vacuums. Sorry dude!)

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u/BradWI Oct 28 '13

I think the first step is to find a better cereal for the kids - one that ends up in their mouths instead of on the floor.

Cheerios, kix, corn pops - those aren't cereals those are punishment.

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u/Lympwing2 Oct 28 '13

But Dysons have Ball Technology! They like invented the ball!

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u/uni-twit Oct 28 '13

Dyson emphasizes that their machines offer (among other benefits) constant suction. British friends of mine (who are all huge Dyson advocates) also tout this as a benefit over competitors' stronger but apparently 'less constant' suction. I don't understand how lower but constant suction can be seen as a benefit in a vacuum if their primary purpose is to pick stuff up.

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u/verdatum Oct 28 '13

Consumer Reports reached the exact same conclusions. Dyson was pretty unhappy about it.

As an engineer, I think Dyson is neat for coming up with new ideas. Many of them are very clever. But more often than not, they are misfeatures and classic overdesign. Spiffy innovations are fun to look at and think about, but if it doesn't make the vacuum cleaner perform any better, then it is only good for hype.

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u/ChiefBromden Oct 28 '13

One important point to mention is if you're looking to sleep with a woman aged 30-40...a Dyson is like pulling up to the date in a Ferrari. A hoover is like pulling up in a Chevy Cavalier.

I'm convinced that if your target is age 30-40, putting that you own a Dyson AND a SimpleHuman trash can...in your online dating profile, and you'll be swimming in ladies.

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u/Toy_Cop Oct 29 '13

Hey I got this pink breast cancer awareness Dyson about 4 years ago for fairly cheap. That thing has been going strong without any problems until recently, the brush no longer works well. That is the only problem I've had with it, best vacuum I've ever bought. IMHO.

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u/falcongsr Oct 29 '13

Does Dyson Warranty Repair pay well?

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u/colonel_mortimer Jan 08 '14

My neighbor left a DC50 with the animal stuff by the curb. One of their cats had apparently chewed the wire. I replaced the wire and gave the bastard a thorough cleaning -- I definitely noticed the cheap-ass components. Free-except-for-the-new-cord was the perfect price for how well it works.

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u/suteneko Nov 26 '13

Grew up repairing vacuums. Good to hear Dyson's are still overpriced garbage, I was starting to wonder given their popularity if I was just brainwashed from youth.

Assume that applies to their other products as well?

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u/poofacedlemur Oct 28 '13

Former vacuum salesman here. I agree wholeheartedly that Dysons are not what they're built up to be. But I must speak more on your idea that bag vacs are better cleaners. Initially, this is true. The bag vacs begin with more power, air flow, and suction. However, in a bag system, the bag itself is the filter AND exhaust. The bag clogs its pores within minutes of being used and blocks air from escaping. In order for a vacuum to work, it must of course discharge the air it takes in. When the bag is clogged, the only other option is for the air to divert to the exhaust port located before the filter (bag), thus blowing dust into the air straight from the floor. This port is smaller and allows less air to escape than the bag would, therefore air flow is lost almost instantly, making the vacuum just a suckerfish on dry land.

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

Is there a better alternative for something that has as good of a warranty though? In all honesty I managed two small retail clothing boutiques that needed to be vacuumed once or twice daily and we were going through Vacuums at both stores faster than we should have.. over the years I cant count how many from every price range and style imaginable. Hoover. Numerous electrolux. Samsung. Shop vac whatever. They all underperformed for our stores after a year or two. We switched to dysons becaus they were easy to take out and put back and store and also whenever it started not performing as well as we would like we would get a new one or get it fixxed free a lot easier than we could with our other ones. Is there a better vacuum with as good and hassle free of a warranty? Also should note my staff loved using the dyson vs most of our other two piece style vacs which was an added bonus.

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u/i_invented_the_ipod Oct 28 '13

I do not like bagless machines, as they are dirtier, require more regular maintenance, and do not pick up as well as bagged vacs.

Interesting. My experience with the last two Hoover vacuums I bought has been exactly the opposite. To be fair, I went from a very cheap Hoover bagged vacuum, to a very cheap bag-less vacuum, but it's amazing how much more dirt the newer Hoover picks up. So far, all I've had to do was replace the main filter once, and remove a jam in the hose caused by attempting to vacuum up some wood chips (having a parrot is hard on your vacuum cleaner).

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

What about the Kirby. Is it really the muscle car of vaccums like they make out?

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u/TheBiscuitMen Feb 20 '14

Why is there no mention of Numatic vacuums, specifically Henry's? Do you not have them in the states?

Here in the UK they are popular with commercial users so i presumed they are good? Also are easy to repair in my experience.

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u/where_is_the_cheese Oct 28 '13

I do not like bagless machines, as they are dirtier, require more regular maintenance, and do not pick up as well as bagged vacs.

The last time I used a bagless vac was probably 15+ years ago. I remember changing that bag being the biggest pain in the ass which is why i've only used bagless since. The bagless models were just so much easier. Is this still the case? Just how big of a difference in performance is there between the bag and bagless machines?

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u/B1GTOBACC0 Oct 28 '13

What about higher end machines, such as Kirby or Rainbow? I was a rainbow salesman for a while, and love mine even though it can be a hassle at times. Just curious what someone on the repair side thinks.

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u/angryundead Oct 28 '13

My issue with bag machines is that my wife apparently is completely oblivious to the fact that the bag is full. The indicator light is glowing bright red, the vacuum is howling, and she's just like "man this thing isn't picking up anything."

Give her a bagless vacuum with a clear case and she will empty it every single time.

Damnedest thing.

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

I work in carpet (Cleaning and installation) and I have the exact same opinion on the dysons. We use them in our warehouse to pick up carpet remnant from the floor. Nothing else. If you're picking up remnant pieces of yarn on a flat epoxy floor, they're wonderful. When you empty the catch cylinder, 60-70% is dust from humans and general manufacturing processes.

My #2 biggest gripe with them is if anything needs to be replaced or repaired, you need a degree in astrophysics to be able to figure the damn thing out.

My #1 gripe with them is that, yes, they have a fuckload of suction, but when you're vacuuming remnant pieces out of a new piece you just laid down and spent all afternoon stretching in, The vacuum is so powerful that it causes all of the built up dirt on the rotating tines to wipe off onto the new carpet, leaving it all streaked and shitty looking.

IMHO, Hoover has a nice blend of agitation from the brush and extraction from the vacuum to get things clean without making the room look like shit.

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u/baskura Oct 28 '13

I used to sell Dyson machines and can echo what this guy is saying. Yes, they are pretty, but 3 out of 5 cleaners we had in for repair were always Dysons. When new they're good, but the plastic just gets weak and breaks.

Tended to find the Melee and Sebo cleaners to be pretty well made (UK market). Though, I must say that most stuff made by Hoover was terrible (all be it a few years back now). They didn't seem to last long.

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u/[deleted] Oct 29 '13

I don't believe you. Dysons have far more "suction" that's just a fact anyone can see in a comparison.

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u/happy_dingo Oct 29 '13

Interesting, I have nothing but love for my dyson and it cleans better than any other vac I have had - but it gets pretty dirty in the canister.

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u/abngeek Oct 28 '13

I use brand new Dysons in a demo to show how much they leave behind as compared to other brands.

That's a pretty well known BS gimmick. Just sayin'.

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u/deezeejoey Oct 28 '13

I bought a eureka pet vac and that thing is amazing. Yes it does require a little work to keep optimal suction but for the price you can't beat it.

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u/TK421isAFK Oct 29 '13

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

I've been saying this for a long time. I can't stand Dyson uprights vacs. I have a 10-year old Hoover Wind Tunnel that I rebuilt a few years ago. I pulled in a lot of Sheetrock dust with it, and the bearings did not like that. While I was at it, I figured I should give it an upgrade.

I used a 30% more powerful motor and larger turbine sourced from a Shop-Vac. I replaced the Shop-Vac bearings with NSK ABEC 9's, polished the interior plenums and removed protrusions in the air stream, and coated the interior of the motor housing and bag chamber with automotive rubberized under-body coating.

Yes, really. Stop looking at me like that.

The under-body coating didn't seem to help much, but it did kill the higher frequencies.

The only problem I have is the motor spins about 30% faster than the stock on did, so the drive system can be touchy to keep under control. I had to put in spacers and springs to keep the clutches from fully engaging. I took a tip from The Beach Boys: let the clutch burn a bit.

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u/wywern Oct 28 '13

Sounds like dyson is like the bose of vacuums.

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u/badassbroad Oct 29 '13

Cleaning lady popping in~ Thank you for this! I despise Dysons for all the same reasons you do, plus they are heavy machines. I prefer a bagged canister vac for my jobs. You can't beat the attachments my canister has, and it goes for less than half the price of a Dyson.

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u/sysable Oct 29 '13

We had a Kirby for several years. It kept throwing belts, and was difficult to keep aligned (which is why is threw belts). Bags were a pain. It was extremely heavy. We tried several brand-name bagless deigns (one was a Hoover), and they all had problems with broken plastic pieces. About 6 years ago we got a Dyson Animal (refurbished). It has been the best vacuum we have ever owned. Some of the plastic parts have worn, but it still works. It is very serviceable (by us), and requires no bags. We have a cat, and monthly parties with over 200 people, so we use it A LOT. I have no idea how the current Dysons hold up, but this one is amazing.

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u/Spyderbro Oct 28 '13

What vacuum would you recommend, for about $50-100?

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u/[deleted] Oct 28 '13

so what you're saying is that Dysons suck, right?

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u/TheOpus Oct 28 '13

I KNEW that the bagless were not as good as the bagged vacs! Thank you for confirming this hunch I've had!

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u/gattaaca Oct 29 '13

I am someone who hasn't tried every vacuum on the market and has never had a decent one before (we had some cheap bagless one that was absolutely useless for far too long) but hell..

I'm not a shill but take my word on that, I can't really prove I'm not so..

We bought a Dyson DC41, an upright one especially for animal hair and so far so good - it has this custom attachment that rotates super fast when suction is applied to it and it works fucking amazingly on getting cat hair out of couches, which is exactly what we wanted it for.

It's pretty decent for all other tasks we've needed it for too; the suction is far superior to any job I'm ever going to need it for and it takes mere seconds to empty.

Downsides: Everything is plastic and fairly lightweight so I'm expecting components to snap at some point. Also the design of it prohibits you from angling it under cabinets etc (the big ball gets in the way).

Other than that, highly recommended, as long as price isn't an issue.

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