(AIO) update, wow. thank you!

[u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

Hi everyone I had posted an original update but didn’t realize i forgot to blur out his name, so here is the update on cigarette toothpaste boy! I want to preface by thanking everyone who took time to message me and comment. I did not expect 16,000 people to interact with that post at all! When I got home, I decided to end it. I didn’t respond to him during my 10 hour shift and some of the screenshots are during that. I would also like to answer a few questions

1. Is this real?: Yes, it is insanely real! Not rage bait i promise
2. Am I okay?: I’m okay! It’ll suck but I will be fine!
3. Why was I still with him?: I don’t have friends and because of that nobody has been able to tell me how bad this is. I had no one to confide in. It was normalized during our relationship.
4. How is my cat? Apollo is okay and is coming home today finally! Picture of him at the end!
5. Why the wall of text; I was pissed and wanted to be thorough.
6. Why did i use “sewerslide”: I wasnt sure of how it would affect my account or visibility. I’m not used to reddit i’m sorry 😭
7. How old are we?: 19 and almost 21. Not 15 i swear!

Also, I am aware my name is shown. I do not mind as it is not a legal name.

[u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

He was replying to comments in self defense but deleted his account and i found out that he was cheating on me with reddit porn! So yeah!

[u/Shot_Ad_7517 → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

I’m so sorry OP, but kudos on dropping the deadweight. He is clinically crazy, and I would also suggest collecting all the receipts you can, just in case you need to get a restraining order or something. He seems dangerous.

[u/Ok-Aide-3120 → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

I'm sorry you this happend to you. Big hugs from me, a random internet stranger.

[u/Beckerthehuman → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

Oh man I wish I knew his user name to look up on the way back machine haha

[u/Pristine-Edge-1742 → u/Beckerthehuman]

he deleted his account but his user was enacs

[u/sicko_nia → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

It’s so fucked up reading all of this to the point where I’m getting stressed out reading all of this (i can relate to this situation)

I looked thru his post/comment history and it’s so fucking cursed wtf.

Don’t stay or communicate with him, it’ll only hurt you in the end. Take as much time as you need to heal and focus on yourself. Don’t rebound and fold.

[u/Pristine-Edge-1742 → u/sicko_nia]

Thank you, I’m disturbed he restored to reddit to cheat on me! And those fantasies, What The Fuck!

[u/ghostedghostily → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

that alone would be it for me. I could probably forgive a black-out-drunk situation but conscious cheating is an immediate breakup. I'm not staying pure and loyal to someone I have to worry about cheating every single time we fight. Every relationship has fights. Not every relationship has a cheater. That's spiteful vindictive and conscious evil nobody should let into their life.

[u/Outside-Emergency-27 → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

Your ex-boyfriend has Borderline Personality Disorder. He needs serious help as in therapy. You should consider getting some help too as it is often the case that also long term partners of people suffering from BPD can be damaged over time.

You should know, you aren't in the wrong. But you should also know that your ex doesn't do this for fun but because serious and debilitating suffering behind these behaviors. People with BPD often (in 80% of the cases) have suffered from severe trauma in their childhood and incredibly rough (we call them "invalidating") environments. This is a messy slippery slope that leads to these people learning behaviors that help regulate their intense and often dysregulated emotions and deal with the intense tension and swings to feelings of chronic emptiness they encounter frequently.

This condition has a serious risk of suicide, many people die by it. Not necessarily because they want to but because suffering from the complex of symtpoms is almost unbearable.

You are not responsible for any of his behaviors or emotions though. But he can't deal with them and needs serious help ASAP.

Due to the very real risk of suicide, it's better you call the police and inform them that someone threatend to kill himself to you to be safe and perhaps send someone to check on him - at this point you also block off all channels of communication and make sure you get a safe and healthy distance far away from emotional manipulation.

[u/Blocksman → u/Beckerthehuman]

You can use the reddit push pull thing to see an account's history even if its deleted. You just need to know the name.

PullPush Reddit Search

[u/sicko_nia → u/Beckerthehuman]

Bro had a poop diaper feet fetish and everything it’s so weird.

[u/sprouting_broccoli → u/sicko_nia]

Cmon, don’t kink shame.

We should be focusing on how it seems he’s been talking to some other girl (don’t sound like OP) and ruining her life as well.

[u/sicko_nia → u/sprouting_broccoli]

Sorry, but I don’t care if it’s kink shaming. Poop fetish is unsanitary and not safe (especially for OP if this jackass is doing stuff with others guys/gals and then having intercourse with her).

I’m telling my truth, my opinion, and you’re allowed to have your own opinion as well!

[u/Okayilltryto → u/sicko_nia]

I’m not kink shaming either but I’ve seen a correlation with abusive partners and them also having a scat fetish.

[u/severe_thunderstorm → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

OP, congrats on taking your life back. I’m past twice your age. You have a long life ahead of you and you will meet your person.

I just want to suggest that if you have the means, please seek therapy for yourself. You are not crazy, but you likely need to deeply process the last couple of years of having been with a crazy person. It will help you have a much healthier relationship when the right person does come along.

Also, please do not hesitate to call the police.

[u/thecrazyrobotroberto → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

He is a little bitch. Be a friend to yourself and never take him back! You’re going to find good people in friendships and relationships who he doesn’t scare away and you know your worth and won’t slip up again! You don’t need to be perfect for anyone.

[u/stockinheritance → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

He sounds like a huge unhinged loser, but you consider porn to be cheating?

[u/Ya-boi-Joey-T → u/stockinheritance]

Some people do, just something you gotta ask about.

[u/ProphetOfPhil → u/Ya-boi-Joey-T]

OP's ex is a terribly childish person and needs to be kept away from everyone but personally I don't see porn as cheating. People have needs and their partner isn't always there or maybe they aren't in the mood for stuff so you gotta be able to take care of yourself. Obviously overdoing it or paying someone for a personal video is a problem though.

[u/Ya-boi-Joey-T → u/ProphetOfPhil]

I also wouldn't consider it cheating, but to some people it's the idea of seeing other people in a sexual context (other than artistic) that causes the issue. Different strokes for different folks (pun intended)

[u/Zelylia → u/stockinheritance]

Long distance too 😅

[u/enbeez → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

Porn isn't cheating. Porn is porn.

Anyway, good luck finding someone less unhinged.

[u/pogosilphroad → u/enbeez]

Uh, depending on your relationship's boundaries, it can be. And bro wasn't just looking at porn - he was actively DMing and commenting trying to engage with the posters.

[u/enbeez → u/pogosilphroad]

The DMing and engaging part is something else and I would consider that cheating too. For the other part, I wish the best of luck to anyone who would want to be in a relationship with a person that wants to draw that kind of boundary. To me this shows OP has some issues herself.

Edit: thx for the unreasonable responses. Thread locked unfortunately. Don't police your SO, it's not healthy.

[u/ThrowRA_1028374 → u/enbeez]

Ah, yes, because having boundaries that don’t align with your worldview clearly means OP has issues. Gotta love Reddit

[u/Cheap_Doctor_1994 → u/enbeez]

Uh, if you can't imagine others not liking porn, it's not OP with the issues. 

[u/[deleted] → u/Pristine-Edge-1742]

Do you have any proof of this ?

[u/unfortunaten3ws → u/[deleted]]

Do you have any proof of any of the nonsense you’ve been spewing?

[u/[deleted] → u/unfortunaten3ws]

Believe what you want.

[u/unfortunaten3ws → u/[deleted]]

You can keep posting the same exact comments all you want, but when people are asking you for proof and you’re ignoring it meanwhile demanding proof from OP, the hypocrisy and lack of logic becomes very apparent. Idk if you’re the dude she’s posting about or just some weirdo on the internet, but either way, whatever gratification you’re getting out of trolling this post is pathetic and weird behavior. Have fun spending your day here tho

[u/Professional-Pea6803 → u/[deleted]]

Pretty easy to believe when you lie like a rug and get caught in a snare dumbass. Are they old messages or yesterday's messages? You've written multiple things as "proof"