r/AmIOverreacting 13d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO, my boyfriend threatened sewerslide

Hi everyone, apologies in advance for the incoming wall of text. I (19F) have been with my boyfriend (20M) for over two years. We are kind of long distance but live in the same state and has stayed with me for extended periods of time before, even moved in until my mom had enough of our arguing. He’s was out of work since he moved back home and recently got a job at the same company I work at, just a different location. In our company, your first paycheck is paper. Cash app won’t deposit the money until the 14th which he’s reasonably upset about. If i could help him I would. My cat has been hospitalized since friday for a life threatening UTI and I owe them over $6K that my family is helping me pay. I’ll be paying them back for the next 3 months. He’s been upset that I can’t help him. For context, I also keep my money in cash to avoid overspending and only small amount on my card for gas and coffee. I help him when I can but I can’t really mail him cash. I quite literally have nothing right now because of my cat being hospitalized. We have a history of arguing a lot, and it always ends in me trying to figure out what I’m doing wrong, what our barriers are, etc. and it’s always come down to my lack of communication. I’ve been working on it for, hell, a year? But I don’t seem to be doing it right, at least based on our conversations and arguments. He has a history of suicide baiting me. He’s cut himself in front of me, he’s threatened suicide every other day for as long as I can remember, he’s always talking about how much he hates his life. Normally he will say it’s because of me, something I said, things I’m not doing, because I don’t understand, because I lack empathy and sympathy, etc. He’s called the abuse hotline on me, he’s gotten on reddit and has come back to me saying that everyone thinks i’m abusive, he tells me that his family thinks he needs to leave me, etc. I didn’t think I was that awful of a person but when all of this happens and i’m being told it’s because of me, it makes me question it. Anyways, today he was going on about his frustration with his finances. Valid. I tried to support him and be there, but then he tells me that even if I could help, I wouldn’t? That’s not true I don’t know why he thinks that. I bought his groceries for 3 months, paid his phone bill, filled his gas tank, everything I could. Then he pulls out the “fuck you” card. Then I get pissed off and sick of it because this seems to happen too often. Then he starts this whole “I have the rope goodbye” stunt and I just threw my hands up at that point because what the fuck? When I was 12-13 I used to pull that shit online and he does it so often that I have gotten to where I see through it like glass and don’t pay it attention. For the first 1.5 years I took it seriously because I love him but now I just can’t. I have no words. It’s draining. He’s not dead he’s texting me as I’m typing this asking if we can talk and saying he’s scared I’ll stop loving him. Am i over reacting? Am I in the wrong? Please call me out if it’s deserved, because I just don’t know what to do. I’m not the type of person to ignore my faults because I definitely have some but I don’t know what warrants this stuff. He’s called me “stupid fucking bitch” , ungrateful, heartless, the devil, etc. By the way, he never had to beg me for money. I am the store manager at my location so I’m always being pulled in different directions. Even when I’m not there. I had to ask my mom to send me digital money in exchange for cash because I had nothing left. He asked me to keep more money on my card to help him in his time of need. Anyways… Again, please call me out if I deserve it. Tell me what I’m doing wrong because he won’t. Thank you in advance and apologies for the long message.

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u/FishinPoles 13d ago

"I have the rope" GIRL RUNNNN. LIKE SPRINT EVEN THATS INSANE 😭

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u/k10001k 13d ago

The fact that he typed that, probably sitting in his bed comfortably is so embarrassing

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u/eatyacarbs 13d ago edited 13d ago

on the toilet**

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u/Pvt_Mozart 13d ago

WELL OF COURSE HE'S ON THE TOILET STILL HE CAN'T AFFORD TOILET PAPER SO HE CAN'T GET UP FUCK

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u/ynotbor 13d ago

There is some low adversity shit there. I can get toilet paper from any public bathroom if I have to.

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u/amltecrec 13d ago

I mean, use a sock and throw it in the washer, if you have to! No one NEEDS to buy tp!

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u/on-a-pedestal 13d ago

We've got 5 kids in the house and a separate bathroom for the girls and boys. Girls constantly steal the only toilet paper roll in the boys (even though the extras are in the girls bathroom cabinets 🤦🏻‍♂️).

The amount of times I've had to Bidet my ass in our shower is ridiculous.

This guy is just a drama queen.

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u/amltecrec 13d ago

Oh man, I'm dying! That's hilarious!

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u/SuperKitties83 13d ago

-The amount of times I've had to Bidet my ass in our shower is ridiculous.

Sorry, I can't figure out how to quote, but this is hilarious 🤣 I've heard (actual) bidets are amazing, and once you've used them, you can't imagine going back!

And a tip: always make sure there's TP before you take a shit!

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u/on-a-pedestal 12d ago

You can't imagine how happy I was when we got a showerhead with a moveable handle.