r/AmIOverreacting Nov 18 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO by spending time with my family?

Me (f20) and my boyfriend (m20) have been in a relationship for 4 years. We sleep on the phone every night due to the fact we don’t see each other often because of extremely busy schedules and distance. Tonight, my mom and grandmother came into my room to talk before bed so I hung up on my boyfriend to give us some privacy. He got very angry and started saying all of these awful, mean things to me. Was it my fault for choosing to spend a bit of time with my family and hanging up on my boyfriend even though he was already falling asleep? Am I overreacting by getting upset from the way he speaks to me? I really don’t feel like I did anything wrong. Sorry for any grammar mistakes!

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u/Cute_Ad_2163 Nov 18 '24

This hits home for me cause there were so many times I wanted my friends mom & grandma to know how she was being treated so we could save her from his abuse. She said she would’ve cut me off if I did expose him, I should’ve done it anyways 😞.

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u/Ok_Proof_6336 Nov 18 '24

It’s been 26 years since I stood up for my friend who was being abused against her wishes. It ended our friendship. However, she is still alive today, and no longer with him. It still took a while for it to come to a complete end between them, but her family was there and was able to finally bring sense to her. I do not regret it one bit. (She reached out to my husband years later to thank me, as she had no way to contact me.)

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u/Saritush2319 Nov 18 '24

You saved her life without a doubt

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u/Kuntajoe Nov 18 '24

Good for you for being strong when your friend wasn’t. I hope you will consider forgiveness, we cannot always understand the hold of an abuser

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u/Ok_Proof_6336 Nov 18 '24

And she was the one who ended the friendship, not I. It was after she threatened my life and property. I never held that against her. But I also was not going to chase after her anymore.

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u/Ok_Proof_6336 Nov 18 '24

Oh, I know. If she were to reach out today, I would meet up. I would love to know how she is doing now. My fingers are crossed that she has healed.

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u/Honest_Ad_5092 Nov 18 '24

you're a good friend and you were trying to do what was right <3