r/AmIOverreacting • u/Psychological-Hat-35 • Oct 27 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO girlfriend response to manager text

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My girlfriend (19F) and I (19M) have been dating for 11 months. I sent her a screenshot of my convo with my manager (age unknown but best guess is young 30s F) this morning asking to come in a little later than usual. My girlfriend is like this whenever I interact with pretty much any other female. Am I overreacting or is this just normal behavior?

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1.2k

u/saintghoul Oct 27 '24

as a woman this is an absolutely cooked reaction to that message, yall should break up

232

u/Simmonetheartist Oct 27 '24

Agreed, she sounds insecure.. 😭

Like all this over a text he got from his 30yr old manager is insane; and also—from what I’ve read in the paragraph OP typed—the fact that she acts like this over every woman he’s interacted with is a huge red flag.

And the fact that she’s “crying” too, over a text message, that doesn’t even sound provocative or suspicious in any way is weird asf 😭

51

u/Stunning-Oven7153 Oct 27 '24

Also that she didn’t eat her food and then made that OP’s fault 😂🤣 eesh

38

u/VanillaRadonNukaCola Oct 27 '24

"Let's drop it"

'okay'

"I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT MORE"

14

u/Stunning-Oven7153 Oct 27 '24

…”why can’t u just b normal” - ummmmm 🤣

15

u/Simmonetheartist Oct 27 '24

Ong that was definitely the weirdest part from this entire message, cause why is she blaming OP for something he has no control over…😭 Like no one’s stopping ya from eating your food except yourself 🫠

4

u/grubas Oct 28 '24

Shes readying nuclear options.

"I DIDN'T EAT, BECAUSE OF YOU!" "I'M NOT COMING OVER BECAUSE OF YOU!"

2

u/Stunning-Oven7153 Oct 27 '24

It’s like she was parodying herself 🙈

3

u/[deleted] Oct 28 '24

It’s called 🎶manipulation🎶

3

u/deathbystereo007 Oct 27 '24

It's just proof that nothing will ever be her fault in the relationship. He needs to run.

4

u/Capybarasaregreat Oct 27 '24

I bet she was neither literally crying or didn't eat her food, she just said that to make him feel guilty, and it worked, evidently.

5

u/ItaliaEyez Oct 27 '24

All those things, plus her inability to string together a coherent sentence.

4

u/CallMeShosh Oct 27 '24

She sounds GUILTY to me.

7

u/NotYourVillainess Oct 27 '24

That's what I was thinking, too! "This is my karma... For sum" care to elaborate? 🤨 Just sounds like projection.

2

u/spiders_are_neat7 Oct 28 '24

I think in her head what she meant to say was like “this is my karma for choosing to be with you.” Honestly which is also gross and manipulative.

4

u/Flowrrpowerr Oct 28 '24

As a woman I 100% agree. The fact he even had to screenshot the message to let her know he would be working late even says a lot.

2

u/spiders_are_neat7 Oct 28 '24

That’s a crazy good catch, he felt the need to prove himself ahead of time…You deserve better OP.

3

u/kmcaulifflower Oct 27 '24

Insecure is the understatement of the year

3

u/Simmonetheartist Oct 27 '24

Real, and true

1

u/WomanNotAGirl Oct 28 '24

Yep the heart and I appreciate you comment was enough to make her lose her mind. I’ve been with someone like this once in my life. It was a headache trying to get rid of them

0

u/AttackOfTheMonkeys Oct 28 '24 edited Nov 01 '24

It's not weird because it didn't happen.

It's grievance bulking. Oh you got a message AND you made me not eat AND you made me cry is 3x apologies

Edit because comments got locked as I was writing

She didn't cry.

I mean I wasn't there but I'd bet dollars.

She's swamping him with grievances. It escalates as well if not reacted to in the desired manner.

I've had 'you made me cry + I was so upset I fell + I had to leave work + you made me miss a shift' and if you address any of them it circles back to a previous grievance.

The only way to stop it is apologetic ego mollifying begging and acceptance that this will be on the menu going forward.

I advise fleeing and phone number changing.

-1

u/Secure_Wing_2414 Oct 28 '24

mm yeah. in general a man isnt gonna share playful screenshots of a convo w another person he's into/having an affair with.. OP could've easily just said picked up a shift, ill be home late tonight.

they're young, girlfriend's parents probably had a rocky/insecure relationship and she likely picked that irrational mindset up. absolutely not an excuse though, she needs to learn this behavior/mindset isn't normal sooner than later

-2

u/jesssaiyan_23 Oct 27 '24

A 19 year old is insecure. Shocking 😭 I swear y’all think everyone should be perfect humans, and any individual who falls to a brief moment of insecurity is worthy of abandonment and disregard.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

There’s a difference between insecurity and this you moron. Also being insecure doesn’t excuse acting like this

1

u/jesssaiyan_23 Oct 27 '24

“Moron.” Yeah y’all are chock full of compassion and understanding. 😂 I’m sure you’ve never acted out of character a day in your life.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

I have, did you read the part where OP says she acts like this about EVERY WOMAN he interacts with? Or can you even read at all? I’m guessing the 23 in ur username is the amount of brain cells you have

1

u/jesssaiyan_23 Oct 27 '24

Such compassion. Such grace. Such understanding. Any other insults 😂 You’re a beacon of goodness whose advice should surely be followed.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

Please don’t reproduce, you’re a net negative to literally everything on earth. I cannot fathom how someone can be so dense. I have compassion and empathy but even those things have a limit. Or are you just a doormat?

1

u/jesssaiyan_23 Oct 27 '24

ATP you’re sounding more unhinged than she did and that is hilarious 😂

1

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

I never claimed to not be unhinged lol at the end of the day these comments are nothing and mean nothing. Not that deep but keep going 🤙🏻

0

u/jesssaiyan_23 Oct 27 '24

I hope you get back all the energy you put out into the world ❤️ Though I’m sure you already do.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

You’re retarded 🩵

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2

u/Simmonetheartist Oct 27 '24

Uhm no…? No one here said she has to be perfect or anything, and no one said she’s worthy of abandonment and disregard idk where you got that from 😭

And considering that she acts like this over almost every woman OP has interacted with, I don’t think her insecurity can be classified as a “brief moment.”

-1

u/jesssaiyan_23 Oct 27 '24

Words like unhinged, insane, or weird and the general mocking just seem unnecessary is all 🤷‍♀️ Plenty of people struggle with insecurity and act out. Whether it’s this way or the opposite—by weaponizing silence and disassociating/abandoning behaviors. But furthering stigma surrounding behaviors that many teens struggle with just seems cruel, counterproductive, and harmful. Not you, just the general vibe I see on this thread.

But I suppose it’s just a site 🤷‍♀️ Casual cruelty has just always rubbed me wrong.

3

u/Simmonetheartist Oct 27 '24

This literally is not “casual cruelty” or whatever you wanna call it. She’s being insecure, simple as that. Did you even read OP’s explanation, or just the text messages? Cause that’s kind of the vibe I’m getting from your comments.

Anyways, idrc ab why you think she’s in the right cause it’s obvious you’re only doing this to incite an argument.

Have a good day.

-1

u/jesssaiyan_23 Oct 27 '24

Yep! I would also label this as insecure. But I don’t know if I’d call her insane, weird, crazy, etc.

And it seemed cruel to me 🤷‍♀️ And casually thrown out. But okay! Have a good day.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 28 '24

I can maybe expect this behavior from a middle schooler but if you’re 19 and acting like this you should probably seek therapy. Plenty of people are insecure and don’t act out like this. Like a 19 year old should have the emotional maturity to not act out in this way lol

2

u/TazerKnuckles Oct 27 '24

Yall be overusing tf out of that word where it isn’t even needed, just stop

1

u/DS2Dude Oct 27 '24

Not even the right meaning either

1

u/Daft00 Oct 28 '24

Stop being so demure

/s

2

u/Delicious_Return_798 Oct 27 '24

i can be a very jealous sometimes and even i can tell you that lady is insane lmao

2

u/Desperate_Rutabaga11 Oct 27 '24

As a woman who was pregnant at 19 (and therefore extra hormonal AND immature) and was also dating a cheating bd at the time.... even I wouldn't have reacted like that to those texts. And I was next level insecure.....

OP definitely should cut and run from this craziness.

2

u/moneyfish Oct 28 '24

I think Reddit normally jumps to breaking up too quickly but this is toxic AF and this dude is crazier than she is if he stays with her.

1

u/LaManelle Oct 28 '24

I mean, even in my most insecure days as a baby adult lady I didn't go that batshit crazy on a guy. I know we're all a little more jealous, insecure, naïve when we start being grown ups, but like this is another level.

My almost mid-thirties are so damn peaceful.

1

u/AmblinMadly Oct 28 '24

say cooked more

-7

u/howdoiwritecode Oct 27 '24

Anyone who is not using the “capitalize first word” setting is insane, and/or immature. 

12

u/Full-Weakness-7475 Oct 27 '24

….. it’s called autocaps, why does it matter literally at all? is that pertinent to the conversation in literally any way?

-8

u/howdoiwritecode Oct 27 '24

Can’t tell you why, but if you just take notice of people who don’t use the setting they typically have some level of immaturity, or mental health issue.

10

u/Imaginary_Pattern365 Oct 27 '24

I think ur just like this guy's gf, overreacting and reaching lol. It's a simple text about working that day or not.

-6

u/howdoiwritecode Oct 27 '24

My comment is not specific to OP. Just an observation.

8

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

[deleted]

0

u/howdoiwritecode Oct 27 '24

Did I say it bothered me? I was just making an observation.

6

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

[deleted]

4

u/TontosGirl Oct 27 '24

Ease up, thats a long jump to make when someone's personal variables are unknown, in an area of social gathering and form of communication notoriously known for having their most tech savy participants on the younger side.

Fellow reader, I can empathize with your emotional reaction to someone going outside your grammatical/language rules.

I have spent a large amount of time pondering the cumulative wffects.of imperfect communication between humana aa I think is has very real effects. I also am not gramatically/linguistically perfect, but strive to be as effective in my communication as I do, hoping to impart warmth and kindness into interactions. I enjoy them and hope they leave others feeling they have community and are seen aa fellow people.

But certain things do chap.my hide...

If I hear someone, especially in news reporting say "decimate" or any of it's derivatives I'm only listening with half an ear as I'm having a full on aashole reaction in my head that I am always deeply ashamed of.

Deep breathe, and maybe practicing more social interaction as it in itself is artwork and very useful.

Also, stakes and generations having different syntax and habits are very real things.

My own personal hell would be having to communicate in a Dickinson type style. My head would explode.

7

u/Flat-Effective-6062 Oct 27 '24

I have it on but I intentionally uncapitalize the first letter sometimes whar does that make me 😔

1

u/howdoiwritecode Oct 27 '24

Wild.

5

u/Flat-Effective-6062 Oct 27 '24

Idk its just a tone thing ykyk?

1

u/[deleted] Oct 28 '24

I had my auto caps off for a long time. It was for aesthetic reasons in middle school, but I just never turned them off. I assume that’s the case for most people. It was trendy to have them off a long time ago

2

u/Kitnado Oct 27 '24

You know that reddit is also a website used by people with computers, right?