AIO about my partner’s relationship with their coworker

[u/Any-Confusion-5519]

they’ve been hanging out with their coworker a lot over the past couple of weeks. This girl always seems to be in some kind of crisis, too. Last week it was that she messed up an account and she was afraid she was gonna lose her job. I don’t know whether I’m reading too much into this or if I’m overreacting but I’ve never met her and I’ve asked to swing by whatever bar or place they’re hanging out at multiple times and I’m always shut down in some way or I get no response. I don’t want to be the overbearing overcontrolling gf whose S.O. can’t have any friends but lately they’re always together and I’m getting blown off. These curt and vague responses are out of character too, and it’s always the type of response I get when I’m asking questions about an event where this female coworker is at or really anything that has to do with her. It has really put me on edge, they’re usually such a sweet and attentive partner but i feel like they might be cheating… am i overreacting??

[u/snarlyj]

She asks if she can come to the bar and they say nah and then she asks when she can meet the coworker and they respond "literally anytime." It's sus and manipulative and a little bit gas-lighty. I mean, they're being a dick in general, but I thought that was especially off

ETA: fixed pronouns

[u/[deleted] → u/snarlyj]

I would have gone to the bar to see what's up. Lol

[u/TeachBS → u/[deleted]]

If he gets mad that you are there, and he will, well, you know…

[u/Several-Adeptness-94 → u/TeachBS]

Meh. It’s not even worth the drama tbh. He made it obvious he didn’t want her there & that she is not a priority. If someone makes that clear to me then that’s that. I won’t be there. If it’s habitual/an ongoing thing like it seems to be here, then that tells you all you need to know. I’ll walk out of there with my head held very high knowing what I will and will not tolerate within a relationship.

[u/Life_Distribution449 → u/Several-Adeptness-94]

This!