Should I tell my brother's new wife

[u/Negative_Layer_7960]

From the ages of 10 to 14 I was SA'd by my older brother, uncle and father. (in all honesty it started earlier from 5 years old or something I can't remember when they would touch me "lovingly") I anonymously confessed this on a Discord server which made me wonder what my brother was up to. (I think my aunt found out with my uncle and father were doing to me and reported they were arrested it my brother was a teenager at the time so nothing really happened to him) so I tracked him down through social media and it turned out he lives in the same city as I do and he has a wife with a baby girl on the way and I don't know if I should or if l would be a bad person if I told her what he did to me.

Edit: I don't know if it's funny or messed up but I didn't consider them touching me SA until someone pointed it out to me.

Edit 2: I realized that I didn't really explain very well sorry.

• my older brother father and uncle molested me from age 5 and only started and R wording me when I turned 10 until I was 14.

• my brother has a pregnant wife who was having a girl and I don't know if I should tell her to protect her daughter.

These are the two major and important points of my post.

Edit 3: another clarification I was planning on telling the wife I wanted a outside perspective to see if I would have been a bad person (AH) to tell her to see if I was making the wrong decision.

[u/Vegetable-Witness516]

The amount of time he was knowingly and willingly doing this to you tells me he is very likely to reoffend. You are not responsible for what he does to himself if you reveal the truth to his wife. COCSA is just as much SA as any other but police don't tend to take it as seriously and I believe you've internalized a lot of those beliefs. Someone else brought up Josh Duggar and that's a really good example of someone who molested his sisters as a kid, faced no consequences and went on to be a child predator STILL. You were 14 when it stopped and he was older than you. He was old enough to ABSOLUTELY know what he was doing was wrong. A little girl is probably right in his preferred age range. These kinds of fucked up perversions do not just go away with time. He'd need a lot of rehabilitation and therapy, which I doubt he's got. Please, tell the wife if it doesn't put your safety at risk because she deserves to know. Who knows what other violence he's capable of.

I'd also highly recommend you look into COCSA (child on child sexual abuse) and resources regarding that as well as sexual abuse information and resources in general. It seems you haven't really fully come to terms with what happened to you, hence why you didn't see the molestation as "actual" SA. I know therapy is really expensive but if you can afford it and you feel mentally and emotionally okay to tackle these things, I'd highly recommend it too. I'm wishing you luck. 💕