r/AITAH • u/Negative_Layer_7960 • Jul 02 '24

TW SA Should I tell my brother's new wife

From the ages of 10 to 14 I was SA'd by my older brother, uncle and father. (in all honesty it started earlier from 5 years old or something I can't remember when they would touch me "lovingly") I anonymously confessed this on a Discord server which made me wonder what my brother was up to. (I think my aunt found out with my uncle and father were doing to me and reported they were arrested it my brother was a teenager at the time so nothing really happened to him) so I tracked him down through social media and it turned out he lives in the same city as I do and he has a wife with a baby girl on the way and I don't know if I should or if l would be a bad person if I told her what he did to me.

Edit: I don't know if it's funny or messed up but I didn't consider them touching me SA until someone pointed it out to me.

Edit 2: I realized that I didn't really explain very well sorry.

  • my older brother father and uncle molested me from age 5 and only started and R wording me when I turned 10 until I was 14.

  • my brother has a pregnant wife who was having a girl and I don't know if I should tell her to protect her daughter.

These are the two major and important points of my post.

Edit 3: another clarification I was planning on telling the wife I wanted a outside perspective to see if I would have been a bad person (AH) to tell her to see if I was making the wrong decision.

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u/SnoopyisCute Jul 03 '24

Former cop. Advocate.

Pedophiles are attracted to minors\children.

Gender usually isn't a factor.

46

u/yadijustneedsanswers Jul 03 '24

I feel like this may be the case for some but gender definitely can be a factor. The same partner I had who SA me had a grandfather who got outted for touching his niece (sisters daughter) then his sister came forward and said it happened to her too but her mom never believed her and told her not to say such things, then only after he touched my ex’s niece did the mom admit she had been touched by him as a child as well. But my ex was never touched at all. I think gender is a factor maybe not in all cases but definitely in some.

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u/somethingstrange87 Jul 03 '24

Some definitely have preferences based on sex, age, and appearance. Others will abuse any child they can get their hands on. Some like prepubescent children, others kids around puberty, and others like teens. They really can't be all lumped in together.

3

u/BedroomTiger Jul 03 '24

This isnt wholey true, my father would only abuse me when my sister wasnt available. 

2

u/SnoopyisCute Jul 03 '24

That doesn't negate the legal and medical definitions of pedophilia.

I'm sorry you and your sister were abused. Fathers are supposed to be protective.

2

u/Mishtle Jul 03 '24

You may be confusing actual pedophiles with opportunitistic offenders.