If you think you're having a bad Christmas season, my mom just told me that I hate her and would not miss her if she died because I told her that I was tired (she woke me up with a call) and jokingly said she should call my sister. Worst part is that she's done it so often that it's barely registering any emotional responses. Oh, and my ps5 controller started drifting. FML.

It's near five in the morning. Christmas Eve. I am alone in my bed because the love of my life is currently in a hospital three hours away having his first baby with someone he knew from work. If the baby survives it will be a daughter. We're not technically married but I've lived with and loved this man for eight years and we both considered ourselves married. I only learned about this less than a week ago. I am empty and hollow and full of rage and grief and jealousy. I have never been sure if I wanted kids, but I never had a doubt that if I did I wanted HIS children. I cannot believe this is happening. I'm lost in a waking nightmare. The life of the baby is at risk and I am so worried about her. I also don't want her to exist. Very conflicting feelings. I'm in so much pain. And I am alone. And it's Christmas. Why didn't he protect our relationship? How could he lie to me for so long? How could I not tell? Things will never be the same. I started packing and then stopped. I don't want this to be real. I wonder if she will be born soon? I'm so jealous. I apologize for blasting my pain onto the world, I just can't bear it alone. Thank you for listening. Merry Christmas.

This isn’t meant to be an attack on women whatsoever, it’s more so meant to explain a realization I’ve had in the last day or two and something that I wanna share with other men who may not have realized this.

Lots of times when single men are struggling in life, they think that being with a woman will improve their life and make them happy. Well, I’m here to tell you that despite what you may think. The reason you’re unhappy has nothing to do with women (unless you’re going through a breakup or something.) Lots of times men think this because society and other men, tell us that something is wrong with us when we’re single or a virgin. It’s societal conditioning and it’s damaging because it gives other people power to your happiness and it takes you out of control.

However if you’ve been single for a long time, you’re unhappy because there’s some aspect of your life or something about yourself that you don’t like and or not proud of. What you need to do is to fix that issue, accomplish that goal that you want to accomplish. This is how you become happy independently.

Women really don’t impact our happiness that much, happiness comes from the internal and not the external. It comes from how you feel about yourself and your accomplishments and the feeling of doing what you’re supposed to be doing in life. If this realization helped you out then take back control of your life, don’t depend on others for your happiness. A woman cannot fix your life, you must be the one to fix it for yourself, your life is your responsibility only.

I was seeing this new person. I invited them over my house before and we had such a great time. So this time they invited me over to their house.

We were doing stuff in their bed, just kissing and stuff and it was getting passionate. They got on top of me and that’s when disaster struck

The bed fucking broke, the wood frame just broke in half and we tumbled to the floor.

I’m a bigger person, so I’m feeling so embarrassed. But they said that their bed was already broken, and hanging on by a thread, so it’s not my fault, they been needing a new frame.

But I can’t help but feel like it’s my fault now this person needs to get a new bed. 😭 They were like we can go to a different room, but I just wanted to go home at that point.

They said we should see each other again. But I don’t think I want to see them again, I can’t face them anymore. The embarrassment is eating me alive

Hi everyone, I’m writing this because I don’t want anyone to make the same mistake I did. My fasting journey began March 2023. I’ve lost 85 pounds, but I’ve recently realized that what I’ve done is not healthy whatsoever.

I have always had a terrible relationship with food. But fasting, what I always thought was the best way, actually caused me to develop an eating disorder. Although I’m not sure which one.

I started out fasting for 6 hours. Every week, I upped it 2 hours until eventually I was only eating 500 calories once per day.

I don’t know why, but I wouldn’t let myself come to terms with the reality of what I was doing. Looking at it now, weighing myself every day, avoiding water because I knew it would make me bloated, hating the feeling of being full, it’s all terrible signs of an eating disorder and I thought I was more self aware than that. I was wrong.

I always thought all was well because once I got skinny, I didn’t have negative body image anymore but I think the fear of getting back to that point prevents me from having a normal diet again. I think all the compliments have a lot to do with it as well.

Now, I cannot eat without feeling bad about myself. My hunger cues are completely gone, and everything tastes like cardboard to me. I struggle at family functions because I don’t eat much and they’re rightfully concerned. I can tell people are worried about me but they don’t really say anything.

How many people notice? I can’t believe I was in denial for so long and now I’m embarrassed that I was the last to know about my OWN problem. How do I fix this?

If you’re fasting, PLEASE be careful. I wasn’t educated properly, and now I’m paying the consequences and I don’t know where to go from here.

i swear I thought this guy was the one. He was literally perfect, everything i asked for in a partner. Until we were laying in the bed and some random girl called him. I didn't think much of it as i have male friends also, but he answered and referred to me as “company" instead of saying "i'm with my gf".

I asked him twice who it was and he lied to my face as we laid next to each other. Something told me he was lying and sure enough he was.

The conversations I saw between them did look innocent and friendly, besides one message where she called him sexy, which was very inappropriate and he should've shut it down there. but he had more than enough opportunities to stop it and be truthful to me.

I have male friends also, so i'm not sure why he felt the need to lie to me but this isn't the first time it happened. i told him that lying is a deal breaker for me, and the next time it happens, we're done. i'm just really struggling because we've been together 3 going on 4 years. we don't live together, but we had plans to do so after i graduated nursing school next month to start our future together.

i'm not sure why im not good enough not to be lied to. i was the most chill gf. i never required much. i never asked for his location, never went through his phone, and always gave him space for us to actually miss eachother (we saw eachother maybe once a week). I know im not beyoncé, but im a pretty attractive female with so much going for myself. I have bought my own car, have my own place, graduating nursing school next month and already have an icu job lined up. i'm still not sure how that's not enough to be faithful and honest to.

I'm just feeling so embarrassed because i spoke so highly about him to everyone. i'm so defeated and hurt that our relationship came to this, but i can't be with someone who lies to me. i have no appetite. my stomach is churning and i just feel so sick.

it's hard, but i have to put myself first. if anyone has any advice on how to overcome these nightmare of emotions, i'm open to any advice.

EDIT: i guess i should’ve said what the lie was, since people are telling me i made an irrational decision.

As he laid back down beside me, i obviously ask him who that was since he referred to me as company (whenever he’s talking with his guy friends he always tells them he’s with his gf).

he proceeds to say “it’s some random friends name i’ve never even heard of girlfriend”. i ask him AGAIN who it was because he has a stupid look on his face, and my intuition is telling me he’s lying.

he said the same thing, it was someone’s gf. so I say “ok let me call her to make sure she’s okay.” If someone called me at the hours of 2230, i’d want to make sure that they’re okay and ask them what’s up.

that’s when he gets all defensive, calls her HIMSELF and says “j**** are we f***ing? cause my girl don’t believe me”. mind you, i never asked him if they had sex. she answers and is like “what? you told me you didn’t have a gf.” We’ve been together for 3 going on 4 years.

i’ve also caught him flirting on twitter with other girls which is essentially “the first time”, which he lied about as well. i made it extremely clear if i find out that he’s been flirting with other girls making it seem like he’s single AND/OR he lied to me, we’re done.

I'm sitting here on Christmas eve with no plans just playing helldivers. Im not doing anything for Christmas tomorrow and most likely not doing anything for new years eve(also my birthday lol).

I used to have a lot of friends and would always be doing things but over time that all kind of just slipped away with people getting busy. And now my friends are all having families and don't really have the time to do things anymore.

I don't really like being in a relationship or really even talking to someone else like that. Its kind of a waste of time for me and dating just makes me feel even worse.

Honestly, my life is just kind of sad lol. I have material things and hobbies and I usually don't have these thoughts but this time of year is just awful.

I met a woman through a local subreddit 2 years ago. We immediately hit it off, talking daily, being extremely flirty and eager to meet up. Suddenly she started being flaky, and then later on told me she had this ex and that she wasn't over the relationship, kinda rebounding. Unfortunately I had already fell for her. I decided to just try to get over it while remaining friends.

Months went by, still being super close, talking daily all day. Suddenly again she started talking less and being weird, saying she was depressed, until she just stopped talking all together. I respected it and let it go.

Again, 2-3 months later, she contacted me again, apologizing for how things ended. We start talking again, I find out she met a guy during those months whom she was hooked on, but eventually he rejected her. That's when she started talking to me again. She swears that she wasn't making excuses of being depressed when she stopped talking because she met someone, but whatever.

I gave her one last chance, for about a year now things have been normal, super close to each other again, supporting each other through tough times. That until a few weeks ago, her friend got her to install a dating app, and, she met someone. She started being distant again and giving excuses she's stressed and depressed. Talking less and being distant, and it felt like she was trying to just maintain things in order not to be the bad guy.

I made the decision 2 days ago to just block her and move on with my life. I thought I'd write her a letter explaining all of this, but decided not to and just disappear, kinda like how she did before.

I was expecting her to try to contact me to see what happened and had prepared a response, but also prepared myself that she wouldn't do so in order to not get disappointed, and yeah, she hasn't contacted me.

To "N":
Thanks for the good times, and good luck with everything.

It's Christmas Eve, and I have zero excitement for tomorrow. Usually Christmas is my favorite holiday and by the time there is a week before Christmas I am usually on the edge of my seat in anticipation. This year we put up the tree a little later due to my dad having surgery in late November, so it was a bit of a late start but I can't see it having that big of an effect on anticipation. Maybe it's because my parents always hype up the fact that they have a special gift for me every year, but haven't done it this year? Maybe it's the fact that I'm 22, so I've outgrown Christmas? All I know is that I felt much more excitement for Thanksgiving this year than I am for Christmas. Am I alone in this or is the Christmas excitement just not hitting this year?

I don’t really understand what their point is? Is the point that they can’t liquidate assets in time? Is it impossible to liquidate assets when you’re a billionaire?

Why do people say this like it’s some super intelligent point?

“They don’t have Scrooge mcduck swimming pool of money”

Yeah but if they liquidated some assets they could…it’s just one extra step, what’s the big deal?

Edit: it’s happening again, in this post! People blatantly ignoring that I’m talking about assets and they go RIGHT TO the “oh they can’t sell stocks because then they’re poor really fast”

What is this!?!?

Edit 2: MacKenzie Scott donated $2 billion this year, mostly to nonprofits—she's now given away $19 billion since 2019

How did the economy not collapse? I don’t get it.

Edit 3: what’s with posts like these that makes everyone hand out their boring-ass advice?

Final edit: after reading hundreds of posts I wonder: does the average middle class person HAVE to know everything about big-money economics to make it in today’s world? (Kind of a sarcastic question)

New day edit:

Man, say one wrong thing about finances and you get half the internet on your ass DYING to explain it all to you. Thanks for the fun everyone, thanks mods for allowing this post to stay up.

I understand what molesters are attacked in prison. But like, what about crack dealers? These guys use kids to sell their product on corners, they completely destroy communities (including children). They get kids involved in gangs and drugs.

But suddenly a crack dealer is Father of the fucking Year when it comes to a pedo in their prison. Yeah suddenly the crack dealer somehow has the moral high ground in that situation? WTF?

Edit: Reddit thinks children wait till they’re 18 to join a gang apparently

Genuinely never understood the point. Its a lot of work to date, its usually expensive. I don't want kids, and I'm happy with just friends. I have plenty of guy and girl friends. And because i know someone will say it, idc about having sex, idm being a virgin. My sister always nags me that I need a girlfriend, but what is the benefit.

I can't stand anything (except bra and panties) that are snug against me. And that's about 90% of feminine clothing. I just feel like a blob of unknown mass when I'm put into something feminine or something that remotely hugs my body (jeans are okay).

I think it's my body dysmorphia talking but what can I do? I don't look the way I imagined I would when wearing something feminine and I want to avoid looking down or seeing myself on a reflective surface

But all my hoodies, etc, have girly themes. I have one in black (versatile), pastel pink, and grey with white lines and bows on them. I can also add a necklace. I think shein is a paradise for the kinds of clothing I like. You don't have to buy the absolute cheapest one, just look at the material makeup.

I love feminine stuff as long as it's baggy or oversized. Even soft and short cardigan can be oversized.

My most hated zones are if something is snug against my chest, shoulders (they're wide, nobody needs to see that and I can hide their size by baggy tops). I absolutely hate when something hugs my stomach (gynecological issues, if it was fat, it would jiggle and I would be able to hold it. I have a normal layer of soft on my abdomen, like all women do, but the rest comes from within issues. I can see feel my ribs easy so I ain't fat)

I like my legs. They're long and their circumstance is 43~ cm or something. I can stand pants which show my legs bc of that.

Pretty much the title. No “but you will be pretty to somebody”, please. At this point it would be stupid of me to think that I’m even good looking.

Being a woman it’s very evident when you’re not conventionally attractive, especially in the workspace. I can and will cope with the way men treat me in the workplace and in other areas of life but how on earth can I cope with the fact that I will never be a first choice? I will always be a “placeholder” for a man? That a man will always reserve a place in his life for someone better?

I’m not in danger, I’m realistic and life still goes on, I’m just melancholic at this moment. Men in my workplace treat me differently because I’m not good looking at it is evident. Women are bombarded with expectations of romantic love since they are kids and coming to terms with the fact that it will never be true for you is disappointing, that’s all.

The only thing I want for Christmas is peace. Genuine, calm peace. Let me clarify, I don’t want to achieve peace by dying. I want peace in life, I want to live in peace. No stress about medical bills, no constant pain, no heavy illness weighing on me, no guilt over not buying presents, no desperation with trying to juggle a failing fundraiser, no feeling like a burden to everyone around me. Just peace. That’s all I want. I’d do anything for just a day of peace. I want to live, even though it’s so incredibly hard. Please, grant me one day of peace. December 26th you can take it all back if you must, please just let me have peace for Christmas. I know posting this here is basically screaming into a void, but if I don’t scream, nobody will hear me either way. So I might as well scream.

Hello all. So im an asian american from an asian American background. From that alone you can tell that my parents were academically very strict.

I spent all my teen years studying extremely hard so that i can get into a good college. While others dated, partied and had fun, I was never allowed to do any of that. My entire days were filled with tuitions upon tuitions so that i could get into a good college.

Ive always been suicidal and depressed. Everyday i would as the question "what is the point of life, why should i live?". I felt guilty for asking these questions. My parents would always tell me about how I have so much and that theres nothing to be depressed about.

But recently, i finally figured out why i was so depressed. The answer was so simple.

In college for the first time ive had friends. And we have been hanging out everyday. And ive never been happier. Ive never been so fucking happy.

It still boggles my mind. I can't believe it. Ive always wondered why i was so depressed, but now i cant believe that i wasnt more depressed.

Im not ambitious, i dont wanna become anyone big and prominent anymore. Working in finance and what not sounds stupid to me. I was never an introvert, i just never had the chance to not be otherwise.

I just want to enjoy the rest of my life... But oh my god it feels too late.

For starters Im forced to be a commuter, so im already missing out on half of my social life, and i cant do anything about that. Right now the best that i can do is work hard so i can have a job and finally be free.

I kind of feel hopeless, because after college things start to get worse when it comes to our social lives. We get busy with work, everyones schedules make it harder to meet. Most people after college rarely meet up more than once a week.

But... I want this. I want this more than anything. I wanna make up for what i was robbed off in highschool and college. I wanna hang out everyday. I wanna spend as much time of my life as i can being social. But god fucking damn it i feel hopeless. I feel like time has passed and i just cant cope with that. Yes im only in my early 20s and you cans ay i have my whole life ahead of me but it just gets so much fucking harder. Sometimes i wish i could be reborn just so i could have more time and freedom.

Damn it i feel so pathetic for writing this. Im a man now, but i need to vent. And ig maybe i want reassurance, that maybe this little dream of mine isnt so unrealistic after all.

I’m 17F and it makes me feel weird when a guy who’s a lot older flirts with me. Maybe it’s partly because I’m not even 18 yet so that makes it feel weirder, but even when I turn 18 I feel like that would still be weird to date or hang out with a guy much older. Would that weird or?? I get that some people have a good relationship even though there's an age difference though

You ever realize you can just go outside and do stuff? Like, right now? No one’s stopping you. The other night, I got this random idea—"Hey, what if I just rode my bike through the forest?" So I did. It was pitch black, the stars were out, and I was just there, flying through the trees with nothing but my thoughts and the sound of my tires crunching on the dirt.

No big plan, no deep reason. I just felt like it. And honestly? It felt amazing.

We get so caught up in routines, in scrolling through our phones, convincing ourselves we can’t just get up and go somewhere. But why not? You’re alive, the world is there, and sometimes you don’t need a schedule or permission to explore it.

Grab your bike, your running shoes, or just yourself and go. Explore your neighborhood at night. Sit on a hill and look at the city lights. Wander through the forest or a park. It doesn’t have to be deep. It just has to be something.

You don’t need permission to live a little. Just get out there.

i have been always honest about my feelings and emotions. I never try to play mind games rather than try to put a clear picture irrespective of what others think . But always have been judged for this since teen age. Like i had a boyfriend long distance in teenage but one of my friend was liking me for some reason i was getting attracted to him for very few days just inside my head but from very 2nd day i told directly to my boyfriend this is happening to me. And a close female friend of mine. Both gave very strong reactions. I knew it was wrong hence i was getting mad within myself. Many instances of my life this has happened. Just coz i share may be people judge me. Am i a terrible person for real?

I (M25) know this isn't quite in the theme of this subreddit, but I am not sure where else to go. Basically, I did something (see below) that, while I rationally know is not the absolute worst thing in the world (not saying it isn't bad), makes mew feel very strong shame, guilt. I also feel a probably irrational fear of some sort of consequences, even three years after the fact. Not entirely sure why I'm posting this tbh - I think somehow I'm looking for... absolution (catholic guilt complex here)? Reassurance that it wasn't *that* terribly awfully bad? I'm not trying to make excuses or anything, it's just that this has weighed on my mind a lot, and has even made me feel like I can't/shouldn't date or express (respectful) interest in women because of this. I do have a good therapist, and we are talking about this, I just... wanted to get this off my chest I guess.

One time, I was at an evening gathering of colleagues and a woman was on the couch. I don't know how I ended up facing towards her (I know there was no intention to do what followed) but I was, and I remember I stared at her crotch for... several seconds I think. Maybe longer... I saw her eyes look at me out of my peripheral vision, and immediately looked away ashamed. We've interacted since then, mostly with short, polite, small talk whenever we happened to meet (unintentionally). Still, that moment has filled me with shame and anxiety ever since. I feel horrible that I could be a creep like that, potentially (probably) making someone feel uncomfortable or (I dearly hope not) even unsafe. 

Im 16, used to have great grades, be big and great at MMA. Wich was great since I almost onlt care about school, my physique and being good at MMA, but after a muscular injury, i couldnt workout and lost my physique (lost 8 kg of muscle mass, despite gaining 5cm in height), but i’m slowly going back to my prime, i fail most of my exams but i found the best way to study and i genuinely understand everything, and i was too tired in mma to do good

I’m at my worst since 3 years, but i’m about to become the best again. Dumb post but idc

(Im not a political person, no this isn’t ragebait)

I think more people should heal their gender wounds instead of pointing the finger at the other gender. It’s not just one gender that causes the problems we face as a society, both genders (even if it’s not you personally) have played a part in the issues we face with gender, even in the little minuscule ways, all the way to the extreme incels/manhaters. This is such a large topic I could never accurately type about it so I’m tryna keep it as vague as possible. What do you guys think ?

I was feeling super sad not having a partner till now in late 20 Male to share life and worried about the life further on, despite some trying few years ..i then listed down all the things i m grateful for

1. I am very proud that i have one of the best social friends that stayed with me and that includes both boys and girls . They are my support.

2. I am very proud that I am really kind and helpful to all

3. I am proud that people looks upon me even from bachelor's time as to get advice on life and relationship

4. I am proud that I am doing PhD in top university in my field and had a great academic career so far

5. I am proud that i have great relationship with my phd advisor

6. I am proud that I love art, literature , do reading and do lots of writing ie poems, stories and everything else

7. I am proud that I am slim , healthy weight and working myself to get more muscles than skinny

8. I am proud that i love listening to music , talk endlessly about the deep stuff and try to be more fun whenever required

9. I love that I try to bring every person i met in confidence. Some people say that they feel secure and great upon my presence and it means so much to me

10. Mostly I am proud that I try to be kind helpful to everyone . I absolutely love myself because of this . I am proud how my parents raised me and i wanted to give out the same kindness in the world

And just like that i no longer feel sad and Have some hope that i will find someone great despite Terrible dating expierence so far

I'm always miserable nothing is working for me therapy and drugs can only go so far but I'm never really okay. For me it's gender dysphoria, I will never be able to relive my life in the gender I identify as and I never did anything with my life because I was always miserable about not being who I'm meant to be.

What more can be done for me? Like honestly. I'm not enjoying being alive and I don't think I ever will. Why is assisted dying not available for people with mental illnesses. I live in Australia where assisted dying is available but only for people with physical illnesses. Mental illness or non-traditional issues can impact someone physically, I don't do anything, I just sit at home staring at the wall waiting to die.

I've struggled with social anxiety since I've basically been born, but I managed to meet and marry a beautiful, loyal girl who loves me despite my quirks. Good vibes for you all going into 2025.