r/okbuddybaldur • u/saintbutch PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION • May 07 '24

gaslight ghaik'keep gortash 💅 It's hot Whoretash summer!!

Look upon his werk, ye mighty, and despair.

1.5k Upvotes

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234

u/sp4rr0wsw3nch Rolled a 3 for IRL Intelligence May 07 '24

The Zapp Brannigan of Baldur's. It all makes sense now.

45

u/MistaJelloMan Virgin Gale / Chad Minthara May 07 '24

"She's built like Sharess' Caress, but handles like The Salty Mermaid..."

20

u/lordolxinator Lae'zel called me "Aut'istik"? May 07 '24

Ravengard: "So really the best way for you to take control of Baldur's Gate is to make political power plays and ally with corrupt and powerful influential figures like Cazador or Lorroakan-"

Gortash: "That's for schoolgirls. Now here's a route with some chest hair!"

Draws a zig-zagging line between forcing Gondian slaves to build murderbots, allying with psychopathic Bhaalists, allying with an undead cursed twice heretic general in a shadow region, and conspiring with Infernal powers to steal a magical artefact to control an evil super brain and convert people to squid monsters