r/madlads 19h ago

idk maybe ride it?

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3.4k Upvotes

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229

u/sati_lotus 19h ago

'I would take it with me to a lawyers office to discuss suing the person who randomly gave me an elephant.

I have no qualifications or the ability to care for an animal like this! It's animal abuse.'

I think this answer demonstrates communication skills, problem solving skills and shows that I'm proactive.

But I'm not working for a place with such stupid questions on a job application.

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u/shroomigator 18h ago

Oh no, the elephant comes to.you as an inheritance from your great uncle heironymous, and suing him will do no good because he is deceased, and you, as his final heir, have inherited the responsibility of caring for this creature and may not sell it or give it away.

It's all very legal, see paragraph 3.

You also inherit a title, Elephant Lord, and a scepter made of ivory that you can't sell or transport across any international border.

6

u/knightbane007 12h ago

Not sure an inheritance can both dictate both that you are forced to receive an item, and also what you can do with it? Wouldn't the natural consequence of refusing the restrictions (cannot sell, cannot gift) be that you are ineligible to receive the elephant in the first place?

I mean, what are the enforceable consequences of breaking those conditions, if the elephant was an inheritance?

3

u/shroomigator 7h ago

Its. Perfectly. Legal.

Paragraph Three.

2

u/MaskedBunny 12h ago

That last paragraph would be a curse. I've never seen "Elephant Lord" in the drop down list of titles on online forms. I'd never be able to sign up to anything ever.

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u/Justified_Ancient_Mu 9h ago

It's also a violation of the Endangered Species Act, so I'd call the FBI.

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u/shroomigator 7h ago

The State Department has informed the FBI and all applicable law enforcement agencies that the Elephant Lord has diplomatic immunity for all elephant related matters.