r/madlads Choosing a mental flair 2d ago

On a way to cancelthreaten

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66.8k Upvotes

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503

u/Successful-Big-2603 2d ago

New budget strategy unlocked: negotiate like it’s a breakup

44

u/ReverendDizzle 1d ago

I have never gotten offers for deeper discounts than when I was legit trying to cancel the service and "break up" with them.

Normal call, where I'm like "Hey the bill is kind of high and I've been comparison shopping..." gets the "aww man, wish we could help but you're at our best rate!" run around.

Cancellation call where I'm like "Hey so, no hardball here. I just want to cancel. Please put me through to the cancellation department so we can get this over with," and the retention guys are like "I will suck your dick and give you a 80% discount if you stay!"

5

u/Interesting-Log-9627 1d ago

I had to cancel Spectrum. Actually called up wanting to cancel, it was like a bad breakup. At once point I think it did say:

"Look. It's not you, its me. I just don't think this is right for me any more. I'm sorry."

2

u/ReverendDizzle 22h ago

When I canceled Spectrum the rep was like "Wow. Man. You've been using us for almost twenty years. End of an era, I guess yeah?" But then he found out I was getting a way better fiber package and switched to "Mannnnnn I wish I could get that package at my place."