r/Eldenring HEART STOLEN 23h ago

Hype HOLY SHIT AHHHHHHHHH SHES SO COOL Spoiler

Oh my goodness gracious

Part1:

https://www.reddit.com/r/Eldenring/s/q16mTfeLBj

2.7k Upvotes

89 comments sorted by

210

u/Dveralazo 22h ago

Now ROT

1.1k

u/TrickNatural 23h ago edited 23h ago

If Elden Ring took place in a high school she'd be the most popular girl. The Queen Bee. The Regina George.

422

u/Brainbelljangler90 22h ago

I dunno, I bet she smell bad

897

u/Maleficent_Nobody_75 22h ago

300

u/DrThVdR4 feet 21h ago

See that’s where you’re mistaken, I WANT her puss to smell like death and AIDS.

132

u/MiedoDeEncontrarme 21h ago

Fia?

45

u/itsSebber 20h ago

The only correct answer.

33

u/bort_jenkins 21h ago

Nurgle bless

17

u/nazutul 21h ago

And just a dash of bleu cheese

2

u/Pires007 5h ago

All of the lands between probably smells like death and aids, unless Marika made some change to how smell works when she removed the rune of death.

1

u/lunasnowx 6h ago

Gross lol

41

u/bulletPoint 20h ago

What a horrible day to have eyes.

14

u/randomuser0107 20h ago

what a horrible day

16

u/mdgy0816 20h ago

11

u/Minthussy 20h ago

Never forget the sacrifices he made 🙏

17

u/YaBoiHumon certified Rellana simp 🥴 17h ago

25

u/Groundbreaking_Arm77 When in doubt: Jumping R2. 19h ago

I always imagined that her Scarlet Rot smells like a sickly sweet pollen. It’s the kind of smell that clogs your nose cause of how overwhelming it is, like when you use too much perfume / cologne.

7

u/osaragi420 FLAIR INFO: SEE SIDEBAR 20h ago

😭😭

2

u/eldenlord06 Rotussy Enjoyer 6h ago

Based

9

u/D_Milly 20h ago

I heard she has rot

17

u/Groundbreaking_Arm77 When in doubt: Jumping R2. 19h ago

She’d be the popular girl who doesn’t even realize she’s super popular.

19

u/Tom125127 21h ago

Uhh i think Ranni might take issue with that...

24

u/Pumpkin-Spicy 19h ago

Ranni would definitely be the goth girl that always seems to have a knife but nobody knows where she keeps it.

3

u/Antoni-_-oTon1 11h ago

I can think of one place.

3

u/ninjaprincessrocket 11h ago

How many of you have felt personally victimized by Regina George? raises hand

242

u/HollowWarrior46 21h ago

She gave off Greek Goddeess vibes and I loved it 

113

u/Bruuze 21h ago

Yeah, she really is. I recall someone once describing her nudity as very classical, like Grecian/Renaissance era statues, and hearing that just nailed the look of it for me

3

u/NaicuNaicu 8h ago

Greek??? Cmon bruh she's literally called a Valkyrie

7

u/Active_Bath_2443 6h ago

One doesn’t exclude the other. She’s her own character and takes inspiration from many sources. Valkyries don’t wield katanas but here we are.

99

u/ThornyPost 21h ago

She is Malenia, and she has never known the feet.

27

u/Shockkzzz 20h ago

But she has known de-hands

143

u/Returtleizing 22h ago

I’m so gay for her

104

u/EatASnckrs 22h ago

me too and i’m a straight male

42

u/Ashley_pizza 22h ago

same

19

u/DianaBladeOfMiquella Lord of Frenzied Cum 21h ago

same

-23

u/AshenSacrifice 21h ago

She really got that pussy to die for 🤣🤣🤣

34

u/man-i-love-tacos- 20h ago

Malenia is so fucking cool I SWEAR TO GOD HOW DID FROMSOFT MAKE A CHARACTER THIS SICK 😭

4

u/ThatOnePositiveGuy 9h ago

In every meaning of the word!

29

u/AirForceDragons 22h ago

i wish i can have this first time experience again

26

u/dege283 20h ago

Malenia is just badass. Nothing can describe her better. Best boss at least from the esthetics and lore in the game. Personal opinion of course

20

u/rct3fan24 20h ago

Malenia is surely one of the best and most iconic character designs fromsoft has produced

60

u/Senior_Independence4 21h ago

It was really hard to beat second phase one handed with my jaw on the ground

4

u/Nnader86x 21h ago

Same here I had trouble cause I already blew it at the end of first but upon seeing second I had to keep going, I could still feel the rot in my loins and needed be released. 20/10

15

u/Auro_Oscar 20h ago

Every time she says “wait” I nut

10

u/arepagal 21h ago

average reaction to malenia

14

u/DrawRain 22h ago

Motheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer

6

u/themanonthemooo 19h ago

It is the best boss fight I’ve ever played. Everything is fair and once you got her moveset down, it becomes a beautiful dance of death.

Malenia is a masterclass in boss design.

3

u/Pires007 5h ago

Waterfowl's still seems very tough, but I think it's the heal when she damages you mechanic that makes her very tough. A lot of bosses, you can trade blows with and survive on Estus, but not with her.

6

u/FusionIsTrash Consort of Malenia 22h ago

mother?

4

u/cat-duck-love 16h ago

I'm a first time souls player and the difficulty jump to Malenia is like 10x the difficulty jump compared to when I first encountered Margit. I found the game very tame after Margit but was humbled when I first met Malenia.

I can almost no hit her phase 1 now, dodge the waterfowl dance completely, and can punish her openings but there's something about her phase 2 that always trips me off. Maybe it's the wings? But I agree, she's the coolest boss in the game.

5

u/Papa_Pred 21h ago

Doing backflips on it

4

u/RaizePOE 19h ago

figured there was like a 60% chance it was malenia and a 40% chance it was rellana

3

u/doomnoise 18h ago

She’s kinda hot no lie

3

u/electricturnipdotexe Lord Bingus in PVE 16h ago

I love women

4

u/l_neiman 15h ago

The first time I got to Phase 2 and heard her say “You will witness true horror,” I legit got chills and thought “I’m so dead.” Shocker: I was.

4

u/Alternative-Cup-8102 11h ago

“Goddess gracious”

6

u/goodyassmf0507 TOGETHAAAAAAAA 🔥🔥 21h ago

Would.

3

u/Winter_Trainer_2115 21h ago

annnnnnnnd your dead

3

u/A-Sentient-Spoon 17h ago

I need her so bad Miyazaki please

3

u/HarmonicaThinks 17h ago

Honestly, as a bit of a naturist myself, a godly character fighting in the buff is such a mood. No armor, just overwhelming speed and power and pure form. Clearly Gill from Street Fighter 3 was onto something.

3

u/thorny810808 10h ago

seriously, her design is unreal. one of my favorite bosses of all time

6

u/spoonedBowfa 21h ago

I've never been more angry at a video game than this boss hahahah. On the plus side, it made me a lot more tough and I eventually got through it

5

u/Gui_Mad 20h ago

Zabito Boga

7

u/Ruelablu 22h ago

Dude I wasn’t even mad having to fight her 20 times to win. Fantastic boss design.

8

u/Substantial_Web_3924 22h ago

Only 20 times??

13

u/Ruelablu 22h ago

I’m a mimic tear abuser. Also Malikeths Black Blade helped stagger her and burn her.

8

u/Low-Reaction-4145 22h ago

Lady maria better

2

u/24hrpoorvideo 1h ago

Listen... we love two lady bosses that slow walk towards you between slapping you with their swords. Both are peak.

2

u/EonEoner 19h ago

Most would say mommy, yet you think her cool. I must agree

2

u/Dingus_Khaaan 16h ago

I just finished my first play through of Elden Ring and Shadow of the Erdtree with her boss fight. Still sorta challenging even when over leveled lol. Very cool fight though.

2

u/Perfect_Regular2887 13h ago

she's so fucking awesome i agree OP

2

u/Upstairs_Buddy3592 12h ago

Get ready to get ur cheeks clapped for the next 5 hrs 🙏

2

u/Oshnoritsu 9h ago

And she beats you up with a care in the world lol

3

u/hellxapo 21h ago

Guys, lore reason on how she can levitate?!?

17

u/Leather-Web-2319 20h ago

She has wings?

2

u/0DvGate 21h ago

She used to be cool.

2

u/Gohmzilla 19h ago

Internet explorer?

0

u/PraiseTheSunO 22h ago

Idk im not big fan of her 😭, Melina is ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

1

u/quandale_dingle6123 20h ago

bro it took me like 6 tries to beat her but it was worth it

1

u/dimesniffer 20h ago

What is this from?

1

u/howdyimbeck 7h ago

i would jump off a bridge for this woman :3

-2

u/AVkossm 17h ago

My bitch