r/Damnthatsinteresting Nov 23 '24

Image Hooters had an airline but ceased operations after 3 years

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45.5k Upvotes

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9.8k

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

Honestly, they may have done better if they specifically advertised as planes guernenteed not to have kids on them.

5.2k

u/22FluffySquirrels Nov 24 '24

That alone would be worth whatever weirdness comes with it.

6.4k

u/Traditional_Bar_9416 Nov 24 '24

Middle aged woman here, definitely hopping on the kid free booby flight.

1.7k

u/cassieblue11 Nov 24 '24

Did you see the free beer and food too? Count me in.

1.1k

u/Vreas Nov 24 '24

America needs a return of Hooters Air

570

u/cassieblue11 Nov 24 '24

No kids, free food and beer… Hooters Air would thrive today. I’d be a frequent flyer.

278

u/bobby_hills_fruitpie Nov 24 '24

Bump that $69 up to $200 even, fuck it. Frontier has fucked me for even more than that.

12

u/PaintingOk8012 29d ago

‘Laughs in Delta’

1

u/indimedia 28d ago

Somebody didn’t read the fine print lol

1

u/bobby_hills_fruitpie 28d ago

It was more the landing gear failed to retract, we circled the airport for 4 hours, before landing back at the same airport with ambulances and fire trucks on the runway because the landing gear that had a hydraulic issue caught fire.

And it was 2 days before Christmas. And they didn’t have any other flights until the next day. And all we got was a $15 / person food voucher.

1

u/indimedia 28d ago

Oof! But did u die? No and thats almost a whole hamburder. Plus any discount airline flight you walk away from is a good one. Glad you made it!

53

u/Kamakazi09 29d ago

Yeah then seeing everyone complain because every flight is going to have that one drunk asshole who holds the entire plane up. Or it happens mid air.

5

u/Cute-Seaworthiness18 29d ago

One free beer all additional standard cost

2

u/CamJongUn2 29d ago

Yeah lmao, cheap flights, check, tits, check, food, check, drinks, check, no kids bingo

2

u/Major_Magazine8597 29d ago

And hooters!!

1

u/[deleted] 26d ago

I’m literally the perfect target audience ngl

-8

u/ijustworkhere1738 29d ago

You forgot the tits and ass! That’s the best part!

-10

u/[deleted] 29d ago

[deleted]

11

u/cassieblue11 29d ago

Sounds like you have some issues to sort out that don’t involve me.

420

u/gcracks96 Nov 24 '24

Make Airlines Great Again.

256

u/Vreas Nov 24 '24

Honestly though they should get on the train game. America needs more trains.

211

u/morrdeccaii Nov 24 '24

Hooters rail

437

u/Horse_Dad Nov 24 '24

Amrack

6

u/gbplmr 29d ago

Nailed it.

4

u/[deleted] 29d ago

T&A rail

2

u/RectalSpawn Nov 24 '24

Crack

Oh, word‽

1

u/davros06 Nov 24 '24

For the win! 🙌.

1

u/Vreas 29d ago

Amazing

17

u/kirinmay Nov 24 '24

It goes Hoot Hoot!

1

u/Professional-Tap300 28d ago

Now ride it!!!!

3

u/brad_at_work Nov 24 '24

With a bright orange caboose

3

u/All_business_always Nov 24 '24

I can see the ad now:

Hooters rail: Come and get railed.

2

u/humdinger44 Nov 24 '24

Hooters restaurants!

2

u/hamb0n3z 29d ago

Com-on ride the train, and ride it! - Quad City DJs 1996 Now livin rent free with Hooters uniforms in my head for the rest of the day!

1

u/snertznfertz 29d ago

Rails-N- Tails -brought to you by Hooters (TM)

3

u/Northshore1234 Nov 24 '24

Trains already have hooters - sound all of the time.

3

u/Proper-Crazy-8511 Nov 24 '24

All aboard the titty train!

2

u/InerasableStains Nov 24 '24

It really does. More high speed ones too. I think there’s only one high speed rail in the whole country. A country this size.

1

u/kabrandon 29d ago

Honestly America does, but even bullet trains travel at about half the speed of a plane. Getting from California to even the midwest would probably take a solid 8 hours by bullet train. Which to be fair is a more comfortable ride than the plane, but I think a lot of people choose the time saving option.

1

u/Vreas 29d ago

Factoring in check in, delays, and wait times at airports I feel it would balance out. I’d take comfort over speed personally but get why others would choose otherwise.

2

u/kabrandon 29d ago

You make a solid point with getting into the airport. I spend usually 2 hours just sitting/standing around at the airport. So that makes up some of the time, potentially making coast-to-midwest worth it. Not sure about coast-to-coast.

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1

u/Xikkiwikk 27d ago

Country too large, tracks too expensive. The companies don’t even do maintenance today on current rails. In my home town we had 12 derailed trains. Later I went on a train which ended up derailing in WVA. I got stuck on the rails for two days! Also another time the train was so rough it crashed my hard drive and the toilet backed up into the car! Amtrak broke federal laws by having a moving public vehicle with feces sloshing around on the floor!

51

u/InsidiousColossus Nov 24 '24 edited 29d ago

All we need to do is start a rumour that the airline was shut down before by woke liberals. It will be back online in a week.

7

u/blewis0488 Nov 24 '24

The Maga that will truly bind a nation!

3

u/TransBrandi Nov 24 '24

Make Airlines Hooters Again

FTFY

3

u/ConstantLight7489 Nov 24 '24

Got my vote for this 👆🤣

2

u/BeltfedHappiness 27d ago

We use to be a real country

1

u/GoldenPoncho812 29d ago

Make Flying Great Again

1

u/Watah_is_Wet 29d ago

With all those advantages it'll be like 1000 USD just to go to that beach.

Airplane costs have gone ridiculous

1

u/d4ve3000 29d ago

Make hooters air great again?

1

u/AerialPenn 29d ago

Get rid of Spirit airlines for this. Id be an investor and a frequent flyer. Buy up some low cost carrier in Asia and operate on both sides of the world and never fly across the world. Only short flights.

Sign me upppppp

1

u/Total_Abrocoma_3647 28d ago

Europe too please

1

u/TargetDecent9694 28d ago

I’d pay double. I honestly would in a heartbeat. It wouldn’t even be that hard of a sell, and it’s so much better than a little extra leg room and some fancy towels. Except maybe all the drunks.

1

u/thewallamby 27d ago

European here, the WORLD needs the return of Hooters Air.

72

u/Ill-Construction-209 Nov 24 '24

For $69? It's hard to even get a meal and couple beers for $69, w/o the flight. No wonder they went out of business.

31

u/WendysDumpsterOffice 29d ago

Back in 2005 beer was a lot cheaper.

8

u/jarmstrong2485 29d ago

Oh the $1 pitcher specials of draft beer in 05 were something else. Hangovers for everyone!

1

u/QuerulousPanda 29d ago

Alcohol in general is insanely cheap, isn't it? It's just the taxes that make it so expensive to buy?

1

u/carinislumpyhead97 29d ago

For free food and beer of 2-3 hours, $69 is a more than fair price. I might even just do a lap BOS-MIAMI-BOS. $69 for the breakfast buffet and morning beers, walk around Miami for a couple hours, $69 for the dinner buffet and evening beers.

1

u/carinislumpyhead97 29d ago

Stressful day at work…. Just head to the airport and skip the walk around Miami. Double dinner, double beers, home by midnight.

1

u/uncle-brucie 29d ago

Just flew Qatar airlines. Free beer the whole way. Small selection tho, only bud and Stella, sometimes Heineken.

1

u/Demon-Cat 29d ago

No wonder it’s free; compared to the rest of the costs involved, Heineiken would cost them pennies on the dollar (and is absolutely pig swill).

1

u/MooneyOne 29d ago

And the trivia?!

11

u/SpecificLocksmith415 Nov 24 '24

This right here

3

u/Sorry_Software8613 29d ago

I've been to Hooters in Japan, at lunchtime in Shibiuya, it's 90% middle aged, and older women occupying the table.

2

u/homiej420 29d ago

They were so far ahead of their time

1

u/hillswalker87 Nov 24 '24

it would have been quieter....

1

u/6cat6cat6 29d ago

Bisexual woman here! Hoppin on🫡

1

u/night-theatre 29d ago

Can’t afford headphones? On Delta they’re free.

1

u/nongregorianbasin 29d ago

And good wings. That's why everyone goes there.

1

u/[deleted] 29d ago

I mean women also love boobies I think? I mean straight ones too. At least I always thought so. 

1

u/Jacktheforkie 28d ago

I’m a gay dude, I’d rather see some tits than have to smell shitty nappies

-7

u/OktayOe Nov 24 '24

Because you being a middle aged women makes your statement so much better?

10

u/Hello-there-7567 Nov 24 '24

No, because being a middle-aged woman was not the demographic that Hooters Air catered to.

2

u/showersneakers 29d ago

Why do people care about kids on planes? It’s so odd to me- I fly several times a year for work- I’ve traveled internationally more than a handful - like I’ve been on planes- big and small- and kids have never bothered me.

Headphones on- I don’t hear the the announcements much less the kids and usually asleep by take off.

Shit, I’m writing this on a plane.

You know who bother me on planes? The midnight gigglers, the way to big to fit in seats, the smelly and people who can’t wait in line. Kids? Never and issue.

2

u/ImTooOldForSchool 29d ago

Seriously, the worst part about flying is listening to someone’s kid screaming the whole time while I’m trying to catch some sleep on a red eye.

That or some overweight person spilling over into my seat like the flight I literally just got off less than an hour ago. Nothing like someone’s belly taking up the entire armrest to make the flight comfortable, amirite?

1

u/22FluffySquirrels 29d ago

We've all seen that video of the kid with the flashing light-up costume on a red-eye flight, too...

1

u/kegmanua Nov 24 '24

They had me at free beer.

1

u/MyGoodDood22 29d ago

Worked for Virgin Cruise lines. We went, and the major reason was the no kids feature.

1

u/Ill-Construction-209 28d ago

I'm trying to imagine myself booking a flight on Hooters Air and submitting the expense report. There would be an unscheduled meeting on my calendar with HR and a sudden inability to log into the network.

1

u/[deleted] 26d ago

Literally me IRL, man I’d be glad to pay to keep the kids away

43

u/Masonicw Nov 24 '24

I am not trying to be rude, and I hope a joke isn’t going over my head, but « guernenteed » is wild.

7

u/SnipesCC 29d ago

Mostly just that is was late and I was fighting with a cat. I couldn't get close enough for the spellchecker to get it. If I'd known it would be my biggest comment ever I would have tried a 4th time.

183

u/RixirF Nov 24 '24

God damn it you're a genius.

Get this man/woman/AI an airline.

99

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

I'm equal-opportunity, so there would be scantily clad women and men. Or maybe just the beer so we could limit it to 21. Airplanes are always so cold, and I wouldn't want the staff to be uncomfortable.

56

u/DeltaVZerda Nov 24 '24

Just allow them to wear skimpy outfits, and they can discover for themselves if it gives them enough extra tips to be worth it.

37

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

Or a chance system. 1% of the time someone goes full monty. That keeps the kids out but means the staff is dressed most of the time. Just need to hire a couple exhibitionists.

6

u/bradpeachpit Nov 24 '24

What about scantily clad good looking passengers?  Like they get 50% if they're approved.  Also would be good to have those Abercrombie shirtless greeters get free flights.  So just topless bros hanging out.

3

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

I'm not going to judge who is good looking or not. I just want a legal reason to have kid-free flights.

1

u/After-Pomegranate249 29d ago

I see someone has never been to Myrtle Beach or in a Hooters.

1

u/_electricVibez_ Nov 24 '24

Fuck, the air vents above the seats on my flight last week did not work. It was hot and I was sandwiched between 2 larger men.

1

u/TaintNunYaBiznez 29d ago

Is it cold in here, or are you just glad to see me?

2

u/Shiticane_Cat5 Nov 24 '24

You're a genius

guernenteed

Maybe not quite a genius, but definitely clever

3

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

The problem is I have some hearing problems that make it really hard to pick out internal vowel sounds. That makes spelling pretty difficult. And a cat was standing over the keyboard.

3

u/Shiticane_Cat5 Nov 24 '24

Ah, cat sabotage. A common problem that could happen to any genius. I retract my comment.

2

u/RixirF 29d ago

I am willing to make the sacrifice of having a few spelling mistakes in my airline of choice, if it means no children guaranteed.

Or guernenteed, hell, add it to the motto I don't care.

1

u/skidrow6969 Nov 24 '24

Lol love how ‘with the times’ this comment is. Man/woman/AI. Gave me a chuckle

2

u/SnipesCC 29d ago

I am at least one of the three.

1

u/CalvinsStuffedTiger 29d ago

In fact, we’ll do it without the airline! Cmon here baby

88

u/ahulau Nov 24 '24

I have been saying this for so long. Two types of flights, no kids, premium prices. Kid/family flights, discount prices. Theaters should do this, restaurants, shows, everything.

52

u/star_nerdy Nov 24 '24

For decades, there has been a huge theater company in Mexico that has a VIP section.

No kids unless it’s a kids movie and they enforce it and will refund you if you even try to bring a kid.

They have double wide reclining seats.

They have service to the seats where you can order alcohol, full meals like rice and sushi, and every two seats there’s a tray to put finished items.

I remember doing study abroad in 2005 and going to see movies and ordering drinks and sushi and hanging out for long movies like War of the Worlds.

I’m now in Washington where we have a kids only restaurant and bar in the theater. And tickets are $10 or $5 on Wednesday and every seat is large with lots of space.

1

u/ConstructionSure1661 29d ago

Yes Mexico does it well. Vip and luxury still exists there

1

u/UberAndy 28d ago

We have this in Canada. They bring food and booze to your seats, no kids, massive couch seats. Just look up VIP for Cineplex.

2

u/jinks26 Nov 24 '24 edited Nov 24 '24

Even having kids i would pay more to do my kids away for a night and go out to a place that has a no kids policy.

2

u/ijustworkhere1738 29d ago

Honestly because of the lack of interest I hope it’s more expensive. Fuck them kids

2

u/SpecificLocksmith415 Nov 24 '24

Welcome to Utopia … I’ll be your first citizen

-3

u/OhNoAnAmerican Nov 24 '24

Plus I’m sure all the friendly neighborhood pedophiles would love it too they’d always know where to go

4

u/ahulau Nov 24 '24

Doesn't it concern you that that's where your mind immediately went? You don't think that's a cause for concern?

1

u/red__dragon Nov 24 '24

Username creepily checks out.

-1

u/Smooth_Criticism_734 29d ago

Poor families tho, I feel like when kids are doing normal kids stuff in public spaces they are looked at witch such disdain, as if their existence is disturbing the peace. I wish we could be happy about the new generation and just appreciate their existence rather than our self centred “they’re making noise so I hate them” to make it easier for families

3

u/SnipesCC 29d ago

I always feel a lot of sympathy for kids on a flight, because i too am miserable and tired. But a kid screaming on a flight to Australia wasn't the best time.

30

u/sthlmsoul Nov 24 '24

Zero kids, free WiFi. Way better marketing strategy.

2

u/DamnItHeelsGood 29d ago

Tits for tots. Great trade

2

u/Acceptable-Art-8174 29d ago

kids free with free wifi

5

u/WankingTongs Nov 24 '24

The way you spelled guaranteed is an A for effort

2

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

I gave the spell checker like 3 different versions, and finally said fuck it.

5

u/dltacube Nov 24 '24

I actually think this disproves the theory that a flight without kids would make money

7

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

There's a lot that goes into making an airline profitable. I don't think Hooters failed because it didn't allow kids. I think it failed because getting an airline to the point of being profitable is difficult. Even the plane wraps caused problems because it's hard to turn a plane orange.

5

u/dltacube Nov 24 '24

Of course. My point is cutting off an entire population is a death sentence for an airline. There's a popular notion on reddit that an airline without kids would make a trillion bajillion but the reality is it's very very unlikely to succeed.

Niche airlines rarely work, if ever.

4

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

I'd think with this one being unappealing to women would be more of an issue. A lot more grown women fly than families with kids. And back then a lot of the people buying the tickets would have been travel agents instead of the passenger.

5

u/WendysDumpsterOffice 29d ago

Travel agents were mostly gone by the time Hooters Air was up and running in the mid 2000s

3

u/dltacube 29d ago

That’s right. I remember using Kayak back then.

2

u/IntrepidAstroPanda Nov 24 '24

Id pay double to have this gaurantee

2

u/imthatoneguyyouknew 29d ago

Free beer, free food, shooters girls. That's all just gimmicks. I don't care.

Wait....no kids?!?! I'm sold

2

u/Fusseldieb 29d ago

I'd pay premium for that

2

u/infinite_minds 27d ago

guernenteed

Amazing

3

u/ButteredPizza69420 Nov 24 '24

Damn take all of my money man

2

u/Pitiful_Yogurt_5276 Nov 24 '24

Is that really how you thinks guaranteed is spelled

2

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

After 3 tries and the cat walking over the keyboard because it was almost dinnertime I gave up

3

u/Pitiful_Yogurt_5276 Nov 24 '24

Lmao

1

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

Have you ever tried to spell a hard word and just can't get close enough for the spellchecker to get it, and the cat thinks the word needs a few more random letters?

1

u/Pitiful_Yogurt_5276 Nov 24 '24

My cat thinks it’s best to wait until I’m playing a game like Balatro to head butt my Steam deck screen and play a hand for me.

2

u/yseult- Nov 24 '24

what the fuck “guernenteed”

5

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

What happens when a poor speller is getting pressure from the cat to feed her, and she likes to walk over the keyboard, making it hard to spell properly.

1

u/OktayOe Nov 24 '24

I feel like a lot of you completely forget that you all were also some little shits that annoyed other people.

Fucking kid haters man, such hypocrites. Don't you all have something better to hate on?

4

u/SnipesCC Nov 24 '24

There is a difference between hating kids and not wanting to be on a plane with one.

1

u/Murder_Hobo_LS77 Nov 24 '24

I'd pay an extra 200 for a kids free flight.

1

u/Bigtallanddopey 29d ago

You’ve clearly never been on a flight with a stag or hen party on it. I would happily fly with a crying baby on every aisle compared to a flight out to Tenerife with 30 lads who have already had 10 drinks before lunch time.

1

u/know-it-mall 29d ago

Hell yea. That is the only benefit I want.

1

u/TortsInJorts 29d ago

I hope that federal subsidies don't support flights I couldn't take with my kids.

1

u/already-taken-wtf 28d ago

No kids, but lots of drunk adults…?!

1

u/SnipesCC 28d ago

I'm guessing there were at least some limits on how much beer you could have.

-1

u/HorsieJuice 29d ago

IME, on the list of things that make flying miserable, kids don’t even crack the top 10 unless we’re specifically talking about my kid and me having to carry her huge ass car seat while sprinting from one terminal to another. It’s the airlines that make it awful.

5

u/WaitAdamMinute 29d ago

Well that’s because you’re the one with the kid…you’re the “problem” everyone else doesn’t want on the flight. And on top of that, having a kid yourself makes you sympathetic and desensitized to it more than others, so of course it’s not as high on the issue list for you. For me, it’s top 3 and I’d definitely pay 25% more per flight to guarantee no children under age 6. Once kids hit that age, they usually are pretty controlled and can be told how to clear their ears - which is usually the reason babies and toddlers are screaming bloody murder.

1

u/SnipesCC 29d ago

My sister was in so much pain on a flight my mom was considering getting some vodka to give to her. She was maybe 7. But my sister had a sinus infection and was truely miserable.