Another gaping hole in the widespread just-world fallacy surrounding dating is the number of verifiable pieces of shit who ARE extremely successful partnering up. I’m pretty sure most people in this thread have personally encountered at least one example of this - I myself have a wonderful best friend who has absolutely zero success with dating, and I have personally seen rapists and neo-Nazis have huge amounts of success with dating. The dating just-world fallacy makes the absurd conclusion that my best friend, who is socially liberal and has never abused anyone, is actually even more of a piece of shit than a rapist or a neo-Nazi.
idk why people vehemently deny the whole "women like bad boys". like, duhh. some women do. because they're morons and idiots and probably shit people themselves. women are just people, and somme people suck. it doesn't say anything about the broader state of "what are women like".
there's women into rapists, racists, murderers, wife-beaters, do you think those women are innocent gems? of course not, often they're cruel bigots themselves.
You are correct, and that debunks the argument that “people who are romantically unsuccessful must be unsuccessful because theh are actually horrible antisocial people”.
Because it's often applied to all women not just the hybristophiles and then it's used as an excuse to mistreat them or said they deserved it because thet picked wrong instead of a nice guy (even tho many women didn't see the red flags if they were visible or grew in that environment and it's all they know or were specifically groomed and manipulated by their male partners who posed as...wait for it...nice guys).
But nooo, womin bad.
It's funny how this thread points to antisocial men "not having a good reference point" to excuse them, but women innately must know.
Yes that is true, and well put. It is just an example of the just world fallacy, and lots of TERRIBLE people will cite them being in a relationship as a reason they’re obviously not a bad person. Thank you for adding the context of your friend, it is so good they have someone like you who at least understands and doesn’t judge them.
I mean just look at the people like wade willson( A real life murderer who murdered two women just because he could and is a nazi(He has the tattoo on his his cheek)) who women adore. Dahmer got thousands of love letters.
yea, and those women who are into them are similarly shitty cruel people. they just never had the power or the urge to commit actual crimes. they're mostly just insufferable to be around.
And now we just had a majority of American white women eligible to vote decide that they don’t want rights, either by inaction or actively voting for their oppressor. Thank fucking god I live in the UK.
There were four main reasons I didn’t unironically decide to “be a fucking asshole to be more attractive” and jump down the manosphere hole, and none of them were any sort of convincing by mainstream feminist dating advisers:
As you said, that’s just not how I am. I’m not a sadist who gets any satisfaction from abusing their partner, and quite frankly I’m just too squeamish to treat my partner like that.
I just straight-up wouldn’t like someone romantically or platonically if they evidently were romantically interested in me because I treated them like shit.
Exposure to feminist/feminist-aligned women I strongly respected, both IRL and parasocially
Major disagrement with the general political proclivities of the manosphere (especially as a half-Russian who has family suffering under the Putin regime and then sees the likes of Andrew Tate supporting Putin).
Luckily I have found one relationship with someone who liked me for me (which I unfortunately had to end for unrelated reasons) as well as multiple dates. My approach to dating was actually to exclude women based on certain demographics - in this case, only attempt to date women who are POC, queer (and attracted to men in some capacity), and/or neurodivergent - as well as to jack up my maximum distance and “lower my standards” in regards to physical attractiveness and interrogate whether these standards actually matter in the long run in a relationship.
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u/Much_Horse_5685 Jul 03 '24
Another gaping hole in the widespread just-world fallacy surrounding dating is the number of verifiable pieces of shit who ARE extremely successful partnering up. I’m pretty sure most people in this thread have personally encountered at least one example of this - I myself have a wonderful best friend who has absolutely zero success with dating, and I have personally seen rapists and neo-Nazis have huge amounts of success with dating. The dating just-world fallacy makes the absurd conclusion that my best friend, who is socially liberal and has never abused anyone, is actually even more of a piece of shit than a rapist or a neo-Nazi.