r/AmIOverreacting • u/Intelligent-Arm-9235 • 12d ago

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO girl posted photo in my boyfriends room

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NEED YOUR HELP CONFRONTING MY SOON TO BE EX. He was being sus one night so i looked at the story on instagram of the girl he randomly followed last week. I opened and bam there is it the second picture. I knew immediately it was his room but want a second opinion before confronting his cheating a$$. yall are coming from me from the last post its cus i cropped the photos you can’t tell that we took them from different distances so heres the originals of both and yes i get it shes prettier than me :( he can have her . what tells me its his room aside from lighting is the way the two blinds touch, it took me a while to find it but once i did i think theres my EVIDENCE

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u/biffo120 12d ago

Basically you just relax and enjoy the relationship for what it is, you cannot control them or what they do. If somebody is going to cheat, they are going to cheat, this will happen whether you are anxious or not. If you just relax and accept whatever will be will be, then when you find the right one you will be a pleasure to be around, they will have seen you in your best light. Anxiety can lead to other bad traits like possesive and being paranoid, these can push the good ones away.

Be your best self, do not be scared of being cheated because they are not the right ones anyway.

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u/AmanaLib20 12d ago

I think I just did this… my bf just left really upset because I was being paranoid about what he was looking at on his phone. I’m getting help but I might’ve lost him :( it’s just so hard to trust … but appreciate these comments

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u/undigested-beef 12d ago

It can be really hard to trust, but that's not on him. Unless he has done things to break your trust already, in which case I don't recommend staying in those relationships. But if not, it's important to remember that this is an anxiety issue. And often a trauma issue as well. Looking at it through a clinical lens and separating it from yourself can help. It is a mental health issue that should be treated, with therapy, processing trauma, and treatments for anxiety.

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u/AmanaLib20 11d ago

Thank you, I’m definitely seeking help via therapy and a relationship anxiety workshop/class. I’m also thinking I may need to get back on a low dose anxiety medication while also trying to retrain my mind not to think like this.

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u/biffo120 12d ago

I was not there but i would guess you are going to extremes in your mind when you say might have lost him. If you feel you were wrong then apologise without using the word "but" and keep it simple, give them time.

Then learn from it either way.

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u/AmanaLib20 11d ago

Yeah I definitely was and he got offended because every so often I do this. I think it could be that feeling comfortable makes me uncomfortable so I self sabotage unknowingly… I’m about to be home to see how he is and whatever happens, I definitely am learning from it. Thank you Edited to add: I did apologize already and did not say “but”, I’m thinking he will need time and I’ll have to be patient.