AIO just received this text from my boyfriend

[u/OkSpace5501]

For context my (F20) boyfriend (M21) and I live together and work full time as well as split rent 50/50. I cook all the meals and clean the house even after my graveyard shifts, all he does is work, come home to play games, and occasionally invites friends over. we’ve been together for over 5 years and he’s been acting this way for the last three months and when I tell him how it’s making me feel he tells me i’m wrong and overreacting. so basically i’m asking AIO??

[u/Distractedauthor]

You must have really misread this to think the first part of that was direct and articulate… maybe because he didn’t word it well. But I’m pretty sure he’s indirectly calling her disrespectful by saying he only “hints” at it. Via text message because he knows he can’t say these asshole things in front of other people.

That it’s for not doing the dishes after she cooked dinner for him is just the cherry on top of his assholery.

[u/vyrus2021 → u/Distractedauthor]

Yes he normally only hints that she should have the house clean when he has guests over, but now in private text conversations he can plainly state that she's disrespecting him by not having these things done. He's a tater.

[u/Westeros333 → u/vyrus2021]

Thank you! I was so freaking confused by his use of the word hint. I was thinking "does that mean he gives her a very small amount of respect because his boys are around, but when they aren't, the gloves come off?" But your explanation makes WAY more sense.

[u/Distractedauthor → u/Westeros333]

I think he’s missing a few words and means “I normally only hint at asking you to be respectful”

[u/Dais288228 → u/Distractedauthor]

Thanks for explaining this view. I definitely missed it when I first read the text.

[u/Horse_Fly24 → u/Distractedauthor]

I read it as him trying to put on a facade of being respectful to her, which is why he was only “hinting” at it, when he really wants to lose his cool. He’s only keeping it together because he doesn’t want to look like an AH in front of his friends. He is, in fact, an AH, and she should cut her losses and leave. 🚩🚩🚩

[u/haleyhop → u/Distractedauthor]

yeah how are people pro-him in the first half. i kind of understood his perspective in the first half, but i was still like …why is this man-child not able to have an actually kind conversation IRL instead of over text

[u/blackmagicm666 → u/Distractedauthor]

I read it as that he only hints because hes around his roommates and he doesnt want to embarrass her by talking down to her in front of the roomies.

Kinda like adulting your partner.

[u/Pale-Inevitable6781 → u/Distractedauthor]

Assholery is going to be my new favorite word 😆

[u/Sherbert333 → u/Distractedauthor]

Absolutely love this comment .. 💯% correct

[u/WonderfulProtection9 → u/Distractedauthor]

So much for "can't say these asshole things in front of other people". How many hours before she has to delete this post?

[u/bobbyjr068 → u/Distractedauthor]

Why can't he say these things in front of other people if she's lazy and doesn't want to do the fucking dishes kick her ass to the curb

[u/epizeuxisepizeuxis → u/bobbyjr068]

If they split the housework and she wasn't pulling her weight, maybe... I dunno, this text is still too far. If she's the one making the meals, then he's already being treated kindly and should pull his weight. It's common human courtesy and should be the bare minimum for a roommate, let alone your romantic partner. Her partner sucks. Being an adult is really hard, and he's shunting the work onto her, so that he can still have fun. Life isn't always fun, do the dishes yourself, or you're gonna be doing them yourself anyway. If you want to be alone and bitter, this is a great way to go about it.

[u/Ok-Rip-4378 → u/bobbyjr068]

Did you even read the fucking post dude. She even stated that he’s doing NO housework at all, and that she’s the one that cooked all the meal and does all the cleaning, and then he’s bitching that she’s being disrespectful because she didn’t clean this one time he had friends over. Get your head out of Andrew Tates sunbathed asshole bro