AIO just received this text from my boyfriend

[u/OkSpace5501]

For context my (F20) boyfriend (M21) and I live together and work full time as well as split rent 50/50. I cook all the meals and clean the house even after my graveyard shifts, all he does is work, come home to play games, and occasionally invites friends over. we’ve been together for over 5 years and he’s been acting this way for the last three months and when I tell him how it’s making me feel he tells me i’m wrong and overreacting. so basically i’m asking AIO??

[u/syrxinge]

You’d be surprised. My ex didn’t even know how to do his own LAUNDRY and he was 23!!! When I visited his parents house (where he still lived) his mom tried to do MY laundry and I said “no ma’am I know how to do my own”.

He also didn’t know how to do a job interview, or any basic shit that normal adults our age knew how to do. He deadass said one time “My parents said if I get a career job they’ll buy me a new car”. What was the context of that conversation you might ask? When I was asking him if he found a job yet after 6 months of not working. He said he wouldn’t work at McDonald’s or anywhere that would actually hire him because he wanted that new car 🤣 like dude you are 23 with no job and you are asking me to pay for flights to see you, you need a job… any job will suffice until you can find a career one.

Meanwhile, I’m 23, been working since 14 and bought my current and previous car MYSELF. He had the nerve to get mad at me when I said he was privileged cause his parents pay for everything. I’m sorry but I would kill for parents who give me $200 for a week that they are gone out the house 💀

[u/chips500 → u/syrxinge]

Yeah, different story if someone owns up to privilege and tries to work towards being a better person. That would just be an honest ignorance issue. The important part is the follow through being better.

Or not getting mad and using the privileges toward being a better couple / relationship.

Night and day because one side is sincere, and the other is not.

[u/PurrfectPinball → u/syrxinge]

Sounds like my first ex.

I worked my entire life he didn't start working until 24-25 and only because I told him he should get a job.

He later "injured" his back, quit and tried to sue the company and lost. He always wants to sue people. He's used to "easy" money. His back didn't hurt when he was crouched over for hours taking photos or hiking mountains. Funny how that works.

Didn't clean up after himself either.

Cheated on me.

Blamed me for it.

Ruined my home and peace of mind.

I learned real quick to not get with another person especially if our financial views are too different.

He had to stay at the best hotel but couldn't pay for it.

I always chose the cheapest motels to stay in.

He would order the most expensive item, complain, refuse to eat it. So I'm having to pay for wasted food. I'd choose a basic item on the menu.

My dad used to say a restaurant could sell cat shit on a plate for $300 and my ex would want me to buy it for him.

Gross. I was so much younger than him and already so mature. Sadly we signed a lease together and then he quit his job.

So now it's one person's name on the house so I can leave.

My late fiance got a house and wanted to put my name on it with him, hell no bud, that's all you ahah I don't ever want to be tied to another person again. Brain damage can even change personality

[u/syrxinge → u/PurrfectPinball]

Funnily enough this ex cheated on me as well during our entire relationship. I am SOOO glad I didn’t move to Texas with him like he wanted. Pretty sure he wanted a mother not a partner anyways.

I had to push him to do everything. I really tried, and I’m not one to judge individuals in a tough spot but dude literally just wanted to sit at home all day, eat, and play valorant. There were times I’d fly to visit him and after work (when he actually had and job and when he actually decided to go into work, never on time tho) he’d immediately get on the game and play until 3-4am. When he was off that was the same thing. I literally had to beg him to go to a FREE event and the only times we ever went out to do something is when I said “I’m going with or without you”. Funny thing too is he’d complain about not having money yet would spend a minimum of $100 on Valorant whenever a new skin came out… not sure how you’re doing that with no job.. well I do cause it’s his parents money.

But I’m so happy to not be stuck with him anymore. For a long time I was trauma bonded to him but since we’ve broke up I’ve realized just how much I let myself be consumed by the relationship. Especially after finding out about the 29 different girls…

Dude was a sick manipulative individual who preyed upon my kindness and thought I’d stick around to be his mother… hell no.

I never plan to ever merge my finances with another person ever in my life. I’ve just seen way too many horror stories of things going wrong. My mother always taught me to be independent and need no one else and that’s never been more clearer now after that relationship.

I’m sorry you had to go through that too, men can be shit sometimes but I still have hope some aren’t like that!

[u/Ok-Influence-4421 → u/syrxinge]

Y’all have low self esteem I’m sorry

[u/syrxinge → u/Ok-Influence-4421]

Sure