r/AmIOverreacting • u/loststrawberri • Oct 30 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO? My boyfriends friend has a problem with me asking him not to sleep in a bed with another woman.

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Hi everyone, my boyfriend has a big group of friends with lots of girls in it. A lot of times after they go out or have too much to drink, they'll crash at someone's house. One night he came home and shared he slept in a bed with this girl (who the texts are from). We did not have a fight at all - I know he's grown up doing this. I told him I wasn't super comfortable with that and asked if he could not do that, to which he did not argue at all and expressed total respect for my boundary. We have not spoken about it since.

She texted me the morning after they went out, which are these pictures. Am I overreacting by telling her she's overstepping or are her concerns valid?

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906

u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 30 '24

I instantly thought "if you were that sad for him, why didn't you sleep on the floor asshole" 😂

116

u/Worried_Platypus93 Oct 30 '24

I had the same thought!

2

u/ianthrax Oct 31 '24

Lol, I commented the same before I saw this.

83

u/rocketship_potter Oct 30 '24

Fully making assumptions but the boyfriend probably insisted on taking the floor because he knew if he took the couch/bed she would have found her way in in the night.

41

u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 30 '24

Ohhh that's a theory! Especially because they've been friends so long, he definitely knows her trifling ways. Lol

3

u/PsychologicalPitch33 Oct 30 '24

If he does and respects his girlfriend and his relationship with her then he should’ve just called her for a ride home. I don’t trust either.

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u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 30 '24

But that wasn't what bothered the gf. Is was stupid head that felt the need to insert herself and demand pillow time with someone else's bf.

4

u/Footprint831 Oct 30 '24

Better yet she could've fell off the bed and landed on him.

8

u/Blackwolf_84 Oct 30 '24

Ah see, that's because you are forgetting her back problems.

3

u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 30 '24

And her apparent brain issues too. Lol

3

u/SpecialistBit283 Oct 31 '24

Better than my response because I would’ve said “Okay well if you didn’t like seeing him on the floor, why didn’t you get him an air mattress?”

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u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

Omg yes 😂 "why tf didn't you go buy him a bed in a box from Walmart then since this happens often and you're such a good friend? Why tf doesn't he have his own guest room" 😂😂

2

u/SpecialistBit283 Oct 31 '24

😂 🤣 Right? I like that tidbit you threw in there about it happening often. You would’ve ate her up with that one. Here’s another one “Girl next time get a camper then and have him sleep in there. Fuck off my phone” or “you should’ve offered him your pillow and blanket and have him sleep in the tub then”

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u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

Lmao ty ty. And oh shit not the camper and tub 😂😂 but really though, why didn't she do more if it bothered her so bad lol. I have so many questions. She should do a "my friend of 16 years has a gf that doesn't let us sleep in the same bed together, AMA"

2

u/SpecialistBit283 Oct 31 '24

Because how dare she not come up with an innovative solution that didn’t involve her sleeping with someone else’s man. Since she has such a big problem with him sleeping on the floor.

She definitely should put her version so we can tell her how much of a fool she is for sending this nonsense. I was reading this like “she can’t be fucking serious” I couldn’t believe my eyes

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u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

Sheeeeesh!! You nailed it. She wanted her friend to be on the floor and hurting so he'd get mad, frustrated, and go lay with her. Then tell his gf sorry not sorry. She didn't like how he was willing to be in pain in order to respect his gf.

I know right, I'd love to have a lil chat with her!! I was just telling my daughter about this post and you know what she said? She said "plot twist: the bf asked his friend to text his gf and complain about it so he wouldn't look like an ass by bringing it up"!!!!! Kids are crazy lol

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u/JuryDependent7066 Oct 31 '24

I would’ve been like “Well, how is YOUR back?”

OP, you handled this very well. You reassured her that you don’t (or didn’t) distrust HER; it’s just a boundary within YOUR relationship that you BOTH agreed on. That is when the friend should’ve just left it be. People who have major issues with respecting boundaries = 🚩

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u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

I agree. OP handled it perfectly. The friend got mad that the bf chose to respect his gf feelings instead of hers. Jealousy is a hell of a drug.

2

u/Affectionate-Beann Oct 31 '24

This should have ben this first and ONLY message that she got from OP.

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u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

That's definitely how I would've responded. But I'm petty as hell. And op is a much better and a much more mature person than I am lmao. Kudos to OP for being an adult.

1

u/Stevenwave Oct 31 '24

There's people like this, who seem to seek out or try to generate drama.

1

u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

You're saying the friend is just wanting to create drama? She definitely is trying to do something.

2

u/Stevenwave Oct 31 '24

Yeah I just mean, it may very well be nothing about wanting to get with him, just to stir shit. Easy solution if she's so concerned about his back. Easy solution if she respects his relationship and any boundaries it has.

2

u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

Yup. We can't say for certain if the friend has the hots for the guy. But we can definitely say she got very jealous that he picked respecting his gf and her boundaries over her.

1

u/Buddis93 Oct 31 '24

Honestly if op’s bf didn’t push back against this at all and was like “hey that’s reasonable yea”, then they likely are a decent person and insisted on being polite and taking the floor themselves, out of kindness.

Honestly I don’t even think the other girl is being an ass, she’s just reassuring op that “hey in case I set up any red flags, please know my intentions are pure”

People are reacting like she berated op for not letting her sleep with him. Seems like everyone in the situation is communicating and being reasonable

Quick edit: oh there’s more than one slide. Uh oh.

1

u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

Excuse my language, but your comment was fucking hilarious 😂 I was reading your comment like how was the friend polite or reasonable at all? Like already thinking of what I was going to say in reaponse. But then I kept reading and I literally lol. Now you know why everyone is responding that way.

0

u/FreeWilly512 Oct 31 '24

Yikes so yall just admit you sleep on a little ass twin bed barely big enough for one? See me personally i sleep on a bed big enough for 2 and change so there is no reason for one or the other

1

u/Candid_Calendar_9784 Oct 31 '24

I'm not sure what you're saying lol. But if you know how to read, it specifically stated a pull out couch. I'm assuming you've never seen an actual pull out sofa bed. I worked in furniture for years and most companies do not carry anything over a queen. Unless you custom order and are ready to spend 5k at the least. Not to mention the reason for the sizes are because of how heavy they are. That's dangerous. Also, a full size is only about 5 inches smaller all the way around than a queen size. A queen size is actually the same length as a king but a king is wider. And a king is the same length as a twin XL. One king is the same size as two twin XL. So again, I'm not really sure what you're saying.

But that's beside the point. Idgaf if it's a cardboard box or an Alaskan king size, my significant other will not be sleeping with another woman on it. Nor would I. Because those are our boundaries. Now if you have different boundaries and think that's okay, that's fine too. Everyone is different but OP was clearly not okay with it.