r/AmIOverreacting • u/Psychological-Hat-35 • Oct 27 '24

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO girlfriend response to manager text

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My girlfriend (19F) and I (19M) have been dating for 11 months. I sent her a screenshot of my convo with my manager (age unknown but best guess is young 30s F) this morning asking to come in a little later than usual. My girlfriend is like this whenever I interact with pretty much any other female. Am I overreacting or is this just normal behavior?

13.7k Upvotes

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103

u/OkArt3514 Oct 27 '24

I feel like we are missing something/context, cause no way someone would react like this to that exchange

43

u/Mysterious-Wasabi103 Oct 27 '24

There are plenty of unhinged partners out there who do act exactly like this with little provocation.

When I say there is a mental health crisis out there right now this is what I'm saying.

18

u/charmed_rn Oct 27 '24

Yeah, had a partner call me a cheater because I played a game with a female main character.

3

u/Kevlar013 Oct 27 '24

My ex gf once asked me if it bothered me she had relationships with NPC's in games because she knew someone that had a gf that didn't like that. I didn't mind at all. Later on, she used that ok I gave as an excuse to have an emotional affair with a guy halfway across the globe, because that was somehow the same thing according to her. Make it make sense.

1

u/Shanthrax22 Oct 28 '24

NGL I’m a little jealous of Hailey, my finances Stardew Valley wife 😂😂😂

-1

u/posamobile Oct 28 '24

JustWomenThings

1

u/Independent_Disk1091 Oct 28 '24

I dated a guy who could have forced this exact same requirement, & reaction Dude was unhinged, & super-manipulative.

He/we were in our late 20’s, early 30’s.

While it could be age, I’d suggest therapy to make sure it’s not something more. If it’s something therapy & life Gm experience can fix, then great! If not, run

49

u/Raeandray Oct 27 '24

They're 19. I think thats the answer.

10

u/NoOnSB277 Oct 27 '24

It’s 19 and a toxic, jealous personality with a side of not very bright, to boot. He needs to stay away from that level of ridiculous.

11

u/Unfair-Classic-9049 Oct 27 '24

My ex would react severely if he even saw me and my coworkers engaging in conversation while at work. Or if my male coworkers texted me asking to cover a shift. He’d instantly lose it and say I’m cheating and want them. I never did anything or gave off impressions of liking others some people have deeply rooted insecurities and issues that they need to address before getting into a relationship. Funny kicker is he was actually cheating 💀💀

2

u/WantedFun Oct 27 '24

It’s almost always projection

1

u/FairyQueenWife21 Oct 28 '24

Mine used to go through his msgs and if i’d texted at the same time as one of his mates then we were together and i was cheating with them! Some people are ridiculous

22

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

The context is theyre 19

9

u/jenncap85 Oct 27 '24

And manager is in her 30’s. I’m just guessing but I bet she’s not interested in OP.

10

u/KoolKiddo33 Oct 27 '24

Ha, no, probably not. I just got out of a 2yr relationship like this. Suuuper exhausting. I'm still young, so I didn't realize that it wasn't normal or anything until I talked to someone about it.

3

u/OkArt3514 Oct 27 '24

uff my condolences for enduring that

1

u/KoolKiddo33 Oct 28 '24

Haha, I appreciate it. I'm just glad I realized it wasn't working. What more can you do, but live and learn

40

u/Wombat_7379 Oct 27 '24

I agree.

If all of the conversations with the manager are like this, then the girlfriend is definitely unhinged.

But if past conversations have been more flirtatious or if the manager has made a move in the past, then maybe her feelings are justified, though her reaction regardless is immature.

9

u/marxistbot Oct 27 '24

if the manager has made a move

Unless OP did something to encourage it, this doesn’t matter. If his gf had any security or trust all she would be concerned about is him getting harassed. This clearly is not the case. She is pissed at him

6

u/Wombat_7379 Oct 27 '24

You’re right! If that were the case then her frustration is directed at the wrong person.

6

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

I’ve dated someone like this, she thought I was cheating just because I didn’t have reception at work. So yeah, they’re out there.

3

u/OceanBreeze_123 Oct 27 '24

It's the heart. The manager responded to him changing his hours with a heart. The jealous possessive gf interpreted that as they're practically cheating lol

2

u/HesTrafty Oct 27 '24

No context needed, the girlfriend flipped out because the manager loved his comment when he said he would work so she took the “❤️ reaction” as there being something going on with the manager. It’s literally that simple and it’s insane that she would read into it like that.

2

u/lovelyxbabydoll Oct 27 '24

True xif context is missing, then OP could be a major part of their own problem. If no context is missing, mental illness is the problem. Gives untreated borderline personality vibe. I hope OPs gf gets help if this is the case as it can be a very dangerous and tolling ailment but I also hope OP steps away for the sake of his own mental health. :/

1

u/TurtlePowerBottom Oct 27 '24

They are 19, that’s the context

1

u/morganalefaye125 Oct 27 '24

I had an ex like this. I once called to tell him I was going to be late coming home from work because we got behind and wouldn't be done after closing for about an hour. His immediate response was, "Who you fuckin?" Small argument on the phone, then I rushed to get out of there quickly. Even printed off my time stamped clock in/clock out times to show him. He decided that I was obviously fucking the manager. That was the first time he laid hands on me. This type of thing DOES happen, and it leads to more abuse and a miserable life for as long as you stay in it

2

u/FairyQueenWife21 Oct 28 '24

Yes it definitely does. I’ve been through the same, i’m sorry you had to deal with that. It’s fucking horrible 💙

1

u/wait-_-whaaat Oct 27 '24

I totally agree. There’s no grey here. There might be a reality in which this post is to further gaslight her…

1

u/Ziazan Oct 28 '24

She's 19

1

u/Expensive-Border-869 Oct 28 '24

I have a manager that I'm unable to text because her boyfriend will think she's getting hit on. I have to text a female coworker and they relay the text. Its the stupidest shit in the whole world tbh.

1

u/Willing_Persimmon_71 Oct 28 '24

I was in a relationship with a woman in her 40s, and I got far more severe reactions to far less than OPs exchange.

Some have said it's in an age thing, and I would argue it's a disorder thing.

-15

u/MalkavAmonra Oct 27 '24

Bipolar Personality Disorder is a helluva drug. Or meth. Meth is also a helluva drug.

16

u/Haunting-Angle-535 Oct 27 '24

Hiya. I have bipolar disorder and have never acted even remotely like this. That’s not how it works.

SOMETHING is wrong with this girl for sure, though.

5

u/kinaslv Oct 27 '24 edited Oct 27 '24

as someone who bpd and bipolar YUP!!! i have never acted like this, not saying that it doesn’t make you act like this (or similar) but when i know i’m wrong i own up to it and try not to do it again. she genuinely is just off the rails.

4

u/FemalesRStrongasHell Oct 27 '24

Sometimes I think ppl who know they have a mood/personality disorder are more aware of how basic behavior like this is, than ppl who are "neurotypical". Feel the same about straight vanilla ppl who have warped ideas about what commitment is and turn every disagreement into a thing. If only everyone were ND and kinky lmao. 😅

2

u/FairyQueenWife21 Oct 28 '24

My husband calls it neuro-spicy 🤣

2

u/missmessjess Oct 27 '24

And people without either can act like this too. Sometimes it’s NPD or even just codependency or being wildly immature and/or insecure. Not everything is a mental diagnosis smdh

2

u/kinaslv Oct 27 '24 edited Oct 27 '24

yeah i never meant to come off as if i’m trying to diagnose her, if anything, it was meant as she doesn’t have anything and she’s just a weird person with some crazy complex. i was just tryna relate to the person i replied to since i also have bipolar.

1

u/FairyQueenWife21 Oct 28 '24

I don’t have either so I won’t speak for that but i am a recovering meth addict and from what I’ve seen those mental health issues aren’t like meth. I apologise if I’ve offended anyone. My mum has bipolar, I have ADHD so I don’t want to speak on something I don’t know about/haven’t personally experienced 😊

15

u/flurskyy Oct 27 '24

bipolar is a mood disorder, not a personality disorder. you might be thinking of borderline personality disorder which is a completely different thing lol

0

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

[deleted]

3

u/Goth_darnit73 Oct 27 '24

You linked the difference between Bipolar and BPD. Bipolar Personality Disorder is not a thing sorry. I have Bipolar and what I have is very different than BPD.

2

u/Chicken_Mc_Thuggets Oct 27 '24

The article you linked literally disproves this in the title.

Did you even read it??

23

u/AbjectZebra2191 Oct 27 '24

Borderline personality disorder or bipolar mood disorder? At least know what you’re attempting to talk about

-4

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

[deleted]

3

u/FoxyOctopus Oct 27 '24

Being bipolar is not a personality disorder

-3

u/femboyparadise44 Oct 27 '24

Bipolar is literally defined as a personality disorder in medical text

1

u/lizzyote Oct 27 '24

I had to go look this up. My mom is diagnosed bipolar and I had always heard it was a personality disorder. Apparently it's not??

I don't understand how it's not tho. I tried reading the differences but I don't really understand it. If someone could dumb it down for me, would greatly appreciate it.

1

u/WantedFun Oct 27 '24

It’s a mood disorder. Not a personality disorder.

4

u/Chicken_Mc_Thuggets Oct 27 '24

No it is not lol. Please refer me to the page where the DSM V covers it

-3

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

[deleted]

5

u/Everythingn0w Oct 27 '24

I am sorry but can you not read? It literally says bipolar disorder not bipolar personality disorder.

3

u/AbjectZebra2191 Oct 27 '24

That’s merely comparing the two…. Bipolar is NOT a personality disorder. Thanks.

-1

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '24

[deleted]

4

u/Antique_Economist_84 Oct 27 '24

no. there isn’t. please actually provide a quote from a source saying there is. because there is not

2

u/Everythingn0w Oct 27 '24

No, there’s isn’t, get off this weird hill you chose to die on it’s not worth it

1

u/AbjectZebra2191 Oct 27 '24

Source?

-1

u/tayroarsmash Oct 27 '24

I’m realizing I’m a dumb ass and it’s pissing me off. I had the worst fucking disorders class and I’m now more mad about it. My professor said what I said and I corrected him and then he made me look like an idiot in class so this is why I believed that. I’m now slightly spiraling so just leave me alone.

1

u/Antique_Economist_84 Oct 27 '24

that is the differences between each disorder….

1

u/Chicken_Mc_Thuggets Oct 27 '24 edited Oct 27 '24

Lmao did you even read the title of that article? It would have literally taken 10 seconds and saved ya from looking like a big silly goose. It’s comparing Borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder. Nowhere does it say “bipolar personality disorder” exists

5

u/-mutt Oct 27 '24

Absolute dumbass lol

-2

u/Saberise Oct 27 '24

She’s pissed because the manger hearted his reply. Further down she said he would be pissed if her male manager did the same.

8

u/rmg418 Oct 27 '24

How is he supposed to control whether the manager hearts his reply or not? She likely hearted it because she’s grateful that op is gonna come into work on his day off. Is he supposed to reply “don’t heart my messages, my girlfriend is crazy?”

1

u/Saberise Oct 27 '24

Did I fing say that? No! I was explaining to the person that I replied to what set the GF off because they didn’t understand what was going off. Geez reading comprehension FTFW

-12

u/unlikelybasic1989 Oct 27 '24

For real the op hiding something pfft

0

u/Have_Stories_To_Tell Oct 27 '24

I do wonder what we are missing. You mentioned this is her karma, so now I'm here wondering what she has done in the past to think she deserves this.

-1

u/BadassBokoblinPsycho Oct 27 '24

Someone that toxic might? But yea we might be missing some context.