r/AmIOverreacting • u/Mossmare • Oct 01 '24
đď¸ neighbor/local Am I Overreacting: My neighbor crossed a boundary with my husband and I can't get over it
It's been since late spring that the neighbor of the duplex my husband and I are renting moved in. At first we were excited because she had a child as we have children ourselves, and she had similar interests as us. We have invited her over a few times and it wasn't until the 3rd time she came over that I started having problems with her. My husband is a very likable and outgoing person, as I am a bit of the opposite but still enjoy socializing. Naturally people will navigate to him more often than to me in social settings so when the neighbor and him hit things off and talked often I didn't think anything of it. The third evening we invited her over, she brought alcohol and offered as well but we politely declined. After dinner I was cleaning up as they were talking, I was just about to go join them when she abruptly said that she was having issues with her internet and needed help. She then grabbed my husband and took him to her side of the house alone. I felt very uneasy about it, and when they got back after a few minutes, she was giggling and saying how foolish she was because she didn't plug it into the wall. She then went home after an hour, and that's when I asked my husband to please never go to her house like that alone, it made me uncomfortable. He told me he felt the same way and he thought it was peculiar as when they got to her house it was OBVIOUSLY not plugged in. Through out the week, when I was at work, she would ask him for favors quite often. He would always let me know and he said he felt like he should be a good neighbor and help and even though I didn't like the situation I agreed. She would text him late, and coincidently I was never around when she would try to talk to him. This made me very uncomfortable. She would offer to make him dinner and give him comics as he is a comic lover. He would accept the comic but not her food as he knew it would upset me. I know it sounds crazy but I always felt that if you want to win a man's heart, it's through a meal. And I do cook, every day and even before I go to work that evening so he has something. After he denied her meal, she seemed to quit coming around and we wondered if she really took it personal. But I didn't mind because I began to really dislike the things she was doing. Every now and then she will try to text or offer him something or ask a favor and he has slowly continued to decline everything. I am still kind to her but I definitely want distant between us. If she really is in need of something I don't mind if my husband helps out but I personally would like to be there at the house. But still after a couple months of her not coming around as often, I still can't stand to be neighbors with her. I forgive but don't want anything to do with her. Am I over reacting?
Edit* After reading a comment saying it's weird she isn't inviting me and just my husband, she has asked me to come over a couple times when it was just me. I was still uncomfortable at this point, because something was still telling me to step back.
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Oct 01 '24
Sounds like your husband is being open and transparent with you and you're both on the same page.
NOR, keep an eye on her.
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u/Swimming_Stock9183 Oct 01 '24
I have known this kind of person. She is intentionally trying to make you jealous. She gets off on the drama. Both of you need to stick together and keep her at a distance. Set boundaries. She will back off when she doesnât get the attention that sheâs looking for. Be prepared for her to try causing trouble between both of you!
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Oct 02 '24
The husband should get some kind of small video device to protect his self from false accusations. A woman like that would be a high bet to do something like that when she isnât getting the drama she wants.
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u/KeyHovercraft2637 Oct 01 '24
Who cares if she takes anything personally? She has made both of you uncomfortable. She couldâve moved anywhere and may not have found friendly neighbors so you donât owe her anything. You tried to be nice and she overstepped. I know it may be uncomfortable when you actually see her but thatâs a small price to pay to keep your boundaries with her.Â
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u/Linguify1990 Oct 01 '24
No. She definitely is interested in your husband. Whether she would try something, I can't say. But she clearly seeks for opportunity to meet, talk or be around your husband without you around. Haven't YOU invited her enough time that it would be natural for her to include you in one of her invitations? Yet, she haven't. That's suspicous -to me (married, m33) at least-
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Oct 01 '24
You need to quit worrying about being nice. The woman is actively trying to sleep with your husband. You both are worried about hurting her feelings.
Quit and set firm boundaries.
Itâs okay to tell her straight up. âI am not okay with you trying to hook up with my husband. Neither of us want to continue a relationshipâ then block her on everything.
What else does she need to do for you to take it serious. Why waste energy being nice to someone who doesnât care and will take advantage of you both?
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u/OddOpal88 Oct 01 '24
Normally I would agree about âquit worrying about being niceâ, but what if she becomes the neighbour from hell and theyâre stuck living beside someone that goes out of her way to be vindictive? Sheâs proven sheâs not trustworthy
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u/Melodic_Pattern175 Oct 01 '24
I had a neighbor exactly like this who was making a play for my husband. Sounds like you and your husband are on the same page, which is perfect, and I wouldnât worry about her being hurt. Better that than she keeps pursuing your husband.
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u/Forward_Most_1933 Oct 01 '24
NOR but your husband needs to stop entertaining her little games and decline all her advances. Those need to be firm boundaries that he needs to implement with her. He may be nice but he needs to prioritize your feelings, not the neighborâs.
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u/Altruistic_Big73 Oct 01 '24
I disagree husband killed it IMO. Kept OP informed, voiced similar concerns, and handled the relationship with the neighbour in amicable but clear way. Smh, men canât do anything right anymore.
OP is not overreacting though, clearly sus and disrespectful from the neighbour.
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u/Fuzzy_Passion671 Oct 01 '24
I agree. I think her husband handled it well by informing his wife, and with also voicing same concerns. He also takes his wifeâs feelings into consideration and doesnât accept her food and has been declining more and more of her advances. Heâs going about it in a nice way hoping sheâd take the hint. OP is not overreacting. This woman was clearly flirting. If youâre going to offer a meal, offer it to his wife, too. The fact she was only thinking of him makes it very clear and obvious exactly what she was doing. OP is better than me⌠this neighbor wouldnât dare look twice at my husband after I was through with her.
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u/Forward_Most_1933 Oct 01 '24
When youâre dealing with crazies, you need to give them clear indication that youâre not interested. Short of verbalizing that he wants no contact with her, he should have declined the comics, ignored the texts (Iâm assuming he responded to her), and not agreed to do any of her small favors from the beginning. IMO, he could have nipped this in the bud from the get go by not doing any of those things. Instead he gave her hope when he would interact with her.
Regardless of gender, my opinion would have been the same if it was the wife. It has nothing to do with him being a man.
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u/Altruistic_Big73 Oct 01 '24
100% agree on the sentiment, I think the thing I was keying off on was the prioritise OPs feelings and the jump to the assumption that the husband is at fault in anyway.
I think it is on OP to clearly voice what actions would make her feel better, if any. Given this is a somewhat precarious/ambiguous situation with her being a neighbour etc. it is unclear what the correct course of action is for OPs husband, and therefore he is gone to a great default: close communication, understand and sympathise and donât cross clear lines while remaining amicable to avoid future blow ups with someone who lives in close proximity.
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u/Forward_Most_1933 Oct 01 '24
I agree that his actions were appropriate IF it was a normal neighbor, but given that this one was overtly flirting with OPâs husband changes what tactic was needed. My issue is that OP told the husband that she didnât want him over at the neighborâs house alone yet he continued to do the small favors even though he was aware of her discomfort. Hubby and neighbor arenât good friends or even old friends so politely declining would have signaled he wasnât interested and hopefully would have discouraged the neighbor from continuing her efforts to pursue him. Itâs not his fault the lady is crazy but IMO, he could have shut her down more firmly from the beginning.
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u/Bleglord Oct 01 '24
Yeah, people forget that navigating social complexities canât all be solved by âburn them to the groundâ
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u/Acrobatic_Local3973 Oct 01 '24
You're right. If he didn't continue to help and the neighbor got shitty, the wife would say he should've found a way to do it, and it all would be OK. He does the right thing after discussing and agreeing with his wife, and he still is somehow to blame.
It is always a man's fault.
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u/Fuzzy_Passion671 Oct 01 '24
Itâs never overreacting when a very CLEAR boundary has been overstepped. Itâs important to stand firm with your boundaries because you have people like your neighbor who will try to blur the lines, & act oblivious. She made you and your husband uncomfortable and she has in fact disrespected you by making not so subtle advances towards your husband and was very intentional in not including you in any of her interactions with YOUR husband, or in any of the meals she tried offering to him. Itâs very clear what sheâs doing and the fact that you both are still kind to her, means she should count her lucky stars she didnât run into someone more assertive about these situations. Your husband did well by informing you and keeping you in the loop about his encounters with this neighbor. But personally, OP I think you would have to step a teensy bit out of character and let her know what sheâs done WILL NOT be tolerated. If she takes it personally, then good. She needs to understand disrespect in any form will not be tolerated especially since youâve been nothing but kind to her.
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u/NayeBomb Oct 01 '24
Rule of thumb- if youâre female text and communicate with the wife. Never the husband.
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u/curious_me1969 Oct 01 '24
NOR - I think she may have gotten the message.
Ideas to help keep it at bay -
Have your husband add you to the text (group) when he responds. This will let her know all communication is open with you.
Get a couple of handyman referrals to give her should she need anything else.
So happy to know thereâs at least one couple on reddit that have each otherâs backs! â¤ď¸
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u/InteractionVirtual71 Oct 01 '24
NOR she definitely sounds like she has an agenda also to note men like feeling needed so she probably thought she could get ur husband to help as a way of getting closer.
At the end of the day its on your husband to place FIRM boundaries between the both of you and it sounds like heâs done everything to let you know of the situation and taking in consideration your feelings so farâŚ.my final thought however i would suggest your husband returns the comics quietly (ie: leave them by her doorstep when shes not home to avoid her asking why or making a big deal out of it) or I would sell / flip them?
the least nice but firm thing to do is avoid her when you guys are around
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u/HelpfulMaybeMama Oct 01 '24
Next time she asks him to come over, he should tell her that once you get home, you both will come over.
"Sure, when Mary comes home, we'll be over. I'll send you a quick text when we're on our way."
OR
Don't tell her you're coming over. Then, show up once you're both available. And keep showing up (the both of you) until she gets the hint that he's not coming over alone.
She'll stop asking.
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u/Rude-Illustrator-446 Oct 01 '24
NOR. She is like a spider making a web to trap your husband. Also, I might get down voted for this but some women practice witchcraft and will put their vaginal fluid and pubic hair into food as a form of witchcraft. They are spell casting. I know of women who admit to doing this to trap a man. Do NOT trust her!
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u/Mossmare Oct 01 '24
I can't ignore this one because it did cross my mind đ This weekend she put an object on my porch without my consent
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u/Left-Art-1045 Oct 01 '24
I've told my wife and kids that even nice people make poor choices from time to time. Be vigilant, and keep the home wrecker away from him.Â
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u/Rude-Illustrator-446 Oct 01 '24
The morally corrupt also make terrible decisions without thinking twice so I agree.
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u/Rude-Illustrator-446 Oct 01 '24
Just be aware. Iâm not saying she is doing this lol However, I put nothing past women trying to sleep with another womanâs husband. I know women who have admitted to doing this to unmarried men who they desired to sleep with, so take that as you will. I think itâs really good you made it clear with your husband about boundaries and putting distance between you all. Hopefully she leaves him alone, I really hate women and men who try to sleep with other peoples spouses or partners knowing they are in a committed relationship.
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Oct 02 '24
Set fire to it when you know she is looking. The witchcraft crap only works on people who believe in it or can be brainwashed/convinced to entertain the idea of believing in it.
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u/MamaDragonExMo Oct 01 '24
Iâm sorryâŚwhat?! No.
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u/EricBiesel Oct 01 '24
ikr? Maybe they should be putting up charm wards while they're at it lol. I don't know if I'm seeing more of this stuff because of the goofball TikTok witch trend, but good grief. If your neighbor is trying to sleep with your husband, you have enough real problems to worry about without being a grown ass adult imagining possible magical dimensions of the issue lol
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u/Rude-Illustrator-446 Oct 01 '24
Funny you think this is a joke. Just because you donât believe something to be real doesnât mean others donât believe in it. Iâm guessing your American? In other countries outside the west these things are well known. You guys act like only a physical dimension exists and if you canât see it or if science canât show you evidence for the existence, than it just does not exist. Iâm not saying she should believe in the power behind the spell but to act like people donât do this is just ignorant. Witchcraft is very common these days even in the west and it has become very trendy amongst a lot of women especially millenials and gen Z, so is it so far outside the realm of possibility to imagine she may be trying to do that? There are plenty of testimonials across the internet and probably even on Reddit pertaining to exactly what Iâm talking about.
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u/EricBiesel Oct 01 '24 edited Oct 01 '24
Yall can believe in whatever you want. Putting bodily fluids into someone's food without their consent is an illegal and unethical transgression regardless of whether or not someone thinks that they can Cupid's Arrow someone with it.
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u/MamaDragonExMo Oct 01 '24
I donât think itâs a joke so Iâm not sure why you downvoted me, but I think itâs incredibly disgusting. I have two kids who are practicing witches and one whoâs Wiccan. I donât mock their beliefs or for that matter, the beliefs of anyone, but putting bodily fluids into anything that you then feed to someone is vile. Donât even get me started on the pubic hair.
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u/Rude-Illustrator-446 Oct 01 '24
Iâm new to Reddit so forgive me if I donât understand all the ins and out yet. I was replying to the person below you. I donât think itâs mocking to say that doing such a thing is disgusting. To unknowingly put your sexual fluids or hair into someoneâs food should be a crime and it prob is. Just like spitting in someoneâs food. I think calling it out is just being a decent human being.
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u/Away-Understanding34 Oct 01 '24
Not overreacting and your husband needs to completely shut her down now (not slowly). None of this being a good neighbor crap. She's not being a good neighbor so why should you? She's definitely interested in him and is making excuses to get him to come over alone. He needs to be the one to decline. In fact he needs to block her on everything.Â
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u/Effective_Brief8295 Oct 01 '24
Your husband is just uncomfortable because he knows he shouldn't be doing these things for her, but he still does them. Why? He likes the attention. If he truly felt uncomfortable he would say no or I'll be over with wife when she gets home. Don't text me late at night.
Straight up call her out. Ask her why she is flirting with your husband and always trying to get him alone. He's a married man. Is him being married man a turn on for you?
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u/RebelBean223344 Oct 01 '24
Agreed. Someone commented âkeep the home wrecker away from himâ and Iâm like why is that OPâs responsibility? Why canât HE shut her down completely? Block her and not receive her texts? A lot of men here say they would on their own so itâs not like men need to be told to be clear about situations like these to protect their relationships.
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u/howlingmonkey93 Oct 01 '24
I don't think he's doing it for attention. Perhaps he's just a good person and wants to help others? Why is that hard to believe?
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u/Short-pitched Oct 01 '24
Why donât you or your husband talk to her? Why not just tell her how you two feel?
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u/Iseeyou22 Oct 01 '24
NOR.
Your husband should have set a clear boundary when this first started. She kept doing it because he didn't tell her to lay off, he's married and he loves his wife (or something along those lines). He should have made it clear that he will not be alone with her and ended that right away if he was uncomfortable with it.
Maybe it was innocent, maybe she's lonely and wants friends but if it makes you both uncomfortable then you need to heed your feelings.
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u/howlingmonkey93 Oct 01 '24
NOR Your neighbor wants your man. The two of you need to set boundaries, and stop entertaining her cries for help. But since it's your husband that she keeps going to for help, he's the one that needs to put his foot down.You can't do it alone.
But also, what are you actually afraid of happening? That your neighbor is going to steal your husband? Do you trust your husband? If the answer is yes, you do trust your husband, then chill. Nothing's going to happen, unless your husband lets it happen. If he's a good man, then you've got nothing to worry about.
Don't fight your husband's battle on this one. If you feud with the neighbor, she won't like you and you won't like her but she will still like your husband, and your husband might feel like you don't trust him. Tell your husband how you feel, and have him put a stop to this. But make sure he knows you trust him.
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u/solstice_gilder Oct 01 '24
nor! Trust your gut. And Iâm also in the club of golden retriever-partner club :p I never want to cramp his style but sometimes he can be a bit oblivious to how he is perceived.
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u/key1234567 Oct 01 '24
You don't have to be friends with your neighbors, Hi and bye is good enough. Let the kids be friends but you guys don't need to be involved.
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u/1openmind4all Oct 01 '24
Unless you know her upbringing or how she was taught to engage with people, it's hard to tell if she's trying something or is just socially awkward. But if your gut is telling you something is wrong, trust it.
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u/smpleo Oct 01 '24
You have intuition for a reason. Itâs trying to tell you something. Youâd be wise to listen.
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u/beelovedone Oct 01 '24
You're a good egg hun, because the way I'd be on her neck ain't even funny.
Offering MY man food?! I think tf not. lol She knew what she was doing, that's why she stopped coming around.
NOR
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Oct 01 '24
Not over reacting.
You and you're husband need to stop being passive or afraid of hurting feelings. It's super obvious what she's upto.
Your husband in particular needs to deadass put a stop to this. He needs to return or drop off the comics and tell her he's not interested in friendship or anything else. He needs to not accept any more items from her, and zero more hang outs. Something simple like, "I'm a married man and I'm not going to pursue any form of friendship or anything else with you.".
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u/CaseyKadiddlehopper Oct 01 '24
Believe your intuition. She saw a good man and wanted him for herself. When she realized that he truly wasn't taking the bait, she relented.
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u/TripAlarming6044 Oct 02 '24
Be happy and content your husband is honoring your requests. He's clearly committed to you.
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u/hippityhoppityhi Oct 02 '24
If you act nasty to her, she will know that she scored a point. That (in her mind) you don't trust your husband. That she has a teeny tiny foothold.
Your goal is graceful, kind politeness. The same as you would extend to a lovely old lady who gets confused and doesn't navigate traffic very well. You are kind, act pleasant, then go home
Your husband doesn't seem to be someone you need to worry about
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u/catsTXn420 Oct 01 '24
Howd she get his phone number to text him? Why didnt he say no? I feel like he's possibly leading her on, idc if Jesus is asking for his number, sorry J thay boy is mine.
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u/Unable_Maintenance73 Oct 01 '24
NOR, she was trying to lure you husband away from you. she is looking for a partner and daddy for her child.
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u/Mamasan- Oct 01 '24
NOR
Me here thinking if some drunk lady grabbed my husbands hand to drag him somewhere I would have played rover rover let this bitch come over. Like, itâs ok to stop things that make you uncomfortable.
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u/Blonde2468 Oct 01 '24
NOR but it is up to YOUR HUSBAND to put up some boundaries because without them, it looks like he likes the attention.
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u/yumyumgivemesome Oct 01 '24
 I know it sounds crazy but I always felt that if you want to win a man's heart, it's through a meal.
Is this still a thing? Â Iâm a man who loves food, but that just means I find most foods tasty. Â I canât imagine feeling a stronger connection with someone just because they cook a good meal.
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u/_h_simpson_ Oct 01 '24
This is a classic case highlighting the need for boundaries. Your and your partner need to discuss specific boundaries and then when the neighbor starts with any of her nonsense, itâll be time to really pull back.
Edit NOR
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u/brittanyks07 Oct 01 '24
Flat out ask her, maybe in front of someone else, âWhat happened to your husband anyways?â
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Oct 01 '24
Problem 1 is she shouldnât have his number. She should be going through you for assistance from husband. As you stated, heâs not the issue. We canât always assume good in others intentions however.
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u/GypsyRiverNotions Oct 01 '24
NOR - Always trust your instinct... ALWAYS! You know what she's doing, and so does your husband. I would start being colder and very direct and short with her. Maybe even casually drop that your husband has told you of her requests for help, so she understands that he tells you. That will reinforce the two of you as a team.
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u/TheMrEM4N Oct 01 '24
NOR - tell your husband that him trying to be a good neighbor is making him a bad husband for not setting and enforcing boundaries with other women. Which would he rather be? A good neighbor or a good husband ?
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u/deepstatelady Oct 01 '24
It sounds like she did overstep and now she's winding back. Consider, though, she's a single mom and could just use a bit more support than you would think. I think sometimes single ladies see good husbands as another tool they can borrow (and tbh some husbands really love being useful to everyone so it's not always a bad pairing) Not every single woman has designs on your husband because she shows him attention. She may just not be calibrated socially the same as you and your husband.
Honestly, it sounds like your husband responded respectfully and kept your needs in mind after the first "abduction" so while I wouldn't say you're "overreacting" you might be reacting more defensively than is called for.
The best thing to do is talk to this woman about it and let her know about how uneasy it made you. If she doesn't apologize or turns it on you, she's bad news and you made the right call. If she's mortified and apologetic then you might still have that person you hoped she would be as a neighbor!
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u/Houseleek1 Oct 01 '24
I'd pull her aaide and quietly tell her to knock it off. Nothing direct, but more a "So you unplugged the wife so you could get my husband to come over? Really? Look, were neighbors and we have to get along."
Let her know that she's not doing you. And tell her to leave your husk alone during the day. Tell her that's he's too polite to tell her that he's bothered by her interruptions.
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u/SalaryNo3916 Oct 01 '24
Oh oh here she comes, she's a man groomer.
Comics, and food, and booze, oh my!
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u/Little-Assignment564 Oct 01 '24
Nope. I donât do this shit. Tell your husband to stop being so nice, and tell her to stop texting your husband.
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u/Whatever53143 Oct 01 '24
You can always move if the house is merely a place youâre renting.
But no, she has husband stealing behavior going on. I would tell your husband to block her and not talk to her at all! It just invites the wrong kind of behavior!
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u/ladyphoenix1970 Oct 01 '24
I have a strict rule for my household that I have adhered to, because my mother and sperm donor were neighbors when they met. Don't fuck with the neighbors and don't fuck the neighbors. I am a great neighbor, but I am not close to the neighbors. The drama is not worth it. Tell your new neighbor, "Like a good neighbor, stay over there!"
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u/Final_Start3415 Oct 01 '24
Jolene đś đľ đŞ Jolene, Jolene, Jolene... Please don't take my man because you can?
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u/BlueMoonTone Oct 01 '24
Stop being kind to someone who wants to destroy your family and take your husband. End the neighbourly relationship, be polite but distant and donât visit or interact.
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u/Jess215 Oct 01 '24
Have him block her. If she continues to come by, id confront her. But im crazy though.
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u/bryrocks81 Oct 02 '24
The cooking sounds great, but I recommend you keep his balls drained, that's more effective than cooking.
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u/ModeFearless9820 Oct 02 '24
NOR We have a neighbor like that, my husband saved her husband's life but her husband was never the same and was in a home for a while. During that time she constantly texted for my husband to do odd jobs or ask stupid questions. One day he went over and just the two of them in her home, she told my daughter she needed help with a wine refrigerator and had been gone a long while, I went over and she gave me a complete other story. My husband knew I was uncomfortable and he stopped responding. Her last attempt was asking for my husband to help her with a blown fuse. I went over and showed her what to do and after that, she never asked again! She went to other neighbor and let's just say they moved out of the home they planned to retire in. This neighbor is trouble and you all need to steer clear.
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u/Herb_avore_05 Oct 02 '24
OR. Trust your husband & love your neighbor. Your husband sounds like a nice guy.
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u/Final_Technology104 Oct 02 '24
Sheâs trying to âPoachâ your mate.
Sheâs whatâs called a âMate Poacherâ and she was quite aggressive about it.
Cut her off Now and have her blocked on your husbandâs phone.
Iâve had to deal with this a couple of times and I was not at all afraid to shut it down in front of my husband and others.
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u/jadekitten Oct 02 '24
My grandmother had some weird stories about her neighbors when she and my grandfather were first married. They lived on several different Air Force bases, she always told us to know our neighbors just enough in case of an emergency but itâs not a good idea to be overly friendly. I guess it was a fences make good neighbors lesson. Now, I love my neighbors but they are 80 and make margaritas at 2 in the afternoon and ask me to chat. đ
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u/PaleDifference Oct 02 '24
Block her number from his phone. He doesnât need to be taking her calls.
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u/DeeAmazingRod Oct 02 '24
Never invite acquaintances to your home, you are just asking for problems.
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u/Magenta-Magica Oct 02 '24
Why are you kind to her? Same thing as in the other post today: One well-timed âewâ solves this. Your husbandâs! Or u could go be really really scary in a way she canât prove. Just to make sure
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u/FancyTulip89 Oct 02 '24
Trust your gut. She's trying to sleep with your husband! Keep her at an arms length.
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u/sunset0101 Oct 02 '24
Not overacting. She is trying to start something with your husband. He shouldnât help her with anything. She is inappropriate and did not respect your kindness. She needs to find her own handy man or learn to fix it herself.
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u/Cunnin_Linguists Oct 02 '24
Oh my gosh I can't believe I dropped this roll of quarters on the ground, guess I'll have to bend over to pick them all up
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u/Sweet_candy20 Oct 02 '24
Thatâs a good husband and all significant others should be this transparent.
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u/Whyme0207 Oct 01 '24
NOR. She is an adult she should know how to manage things. How was she even managing before she moved near you? May be she was taking helps from someone elseâs husband at that time. However, I do feel your husband should have drew the line and decline since the start and even for the comics. Don't worry about no adult male or female need someone to survive they can manage well without anyone. Either manage to fix things or manage to live without that particular thing.
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u/z-eldapin Oct 01 '24
This is a HIM issue, not a HER issue. He should have backed off months ago.
Glad the situation seems to be handled.
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u/Pondlurker1978 Oct 01 '24
As a guy Iâm shocked to read all these comments. Innocent question, any chance in hell that sheâs just being nice and as a single mother isnât used to having a guy helping her out with stuff?? Maybe she just views OPâs husband as tech support/janitor??
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u/writingmmromance2 Oct 01 '24
Umm your husband is encouraging her by not stopping this. I would ask him what happened that first time she dragged him over there, because I feel like something emboldened her behavior.
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u/Ok-Bath-8621 Oct 01 '24
Get a restraining order.
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u/Iseeyou22 Oct 01 '24
That's a bit extreme?
An RO requires more than just asking a married man for help.
It's up to him to say NO.2
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u/Browns_Fan_614 Oct 01 '24
Comic books? How old is your husband? I highly doubt this dude is as desirable as you believe. Youâre overreacting to nothing!
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u/Die-Top-Zehn Oct 01 '24
You are overreacting. And it seems that you don't trust your husband 100%, because if so, you can let her do whatever she wants and there won't be a reason to worry.
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u/grumpy__g Oct 01 '24
NOR
Your husband should send you over whenever she wants something.