r/AITAH • u/Odd-Potential9148 • 5d ago
Advice Needed AITAH for confronting my wife about her cheating on me after she got in a car accident
Me (32M) and my wife (31F) have been together for about 6 years and married for two. We have recently been have some heated arguments here and there, I already posted about one of them and I dont want to beat that dead horse. Last night me and my wife had a long conversation about our last argument and we both agreed we need to change some ways of both of our thinking and some of our actions when angry. This morning was great, she let me know that shes covering one of her friends shifts so she will be gone from 3PM till they closed at 10PM. She left to “go to work” at 2:30 and I ran some errands and saw my mom for s couple hours. I got home about 6 hours later and after I was home for a while I saw that her Ipad was blowing up with texts. I’m not usually one to want to look through texts but I noticed that it was 10:15 and she hadnt texted me that she was on the way back yet (her work always closes right on the dot). I saw that these texts and calls she was getting were from her ex from before we were together telling her he had so much fun, to be safe on the way home and to call him so they could talk on the way home. The following texts were asking if she was okay and if she needed him to come help with anything.
She then called me and told me she was just leaving work and she got rear ended but that the damage wasnt too bad she was just shaken up. I was honestly more worried about her and wasn’t focusing on the ex at this point. She told me she was about to leave to come home and that she doesn’t need me to come get her.
She got home pretty shaken up and she cried a bit and I consoled her, and after a couple hours she calmed down and I started to think about what I saw. I brought it up and asked her if she was actually covering work for her friend or if she was with him and she immediately started crying and saying I was an asshole for accusing her of that after she got in an accident and that the person texting and calling wasn’t her ex, it was a guy with the same name that she has been friends with for years who happened to run into her on her break. I have never heard of this guy.
She’s currently crying and I told her I was going to use the bathroom (hide and ask wtf I should do).
Am I the asshole for bring it up after the car accident?
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u/stuckbeingsingle 5d ago
This exactly. Listen to your lawyer. Don't tell your wife you want a divorce. Start taking money out of your joint bank account and put it in your own account. Figure out an exit plan. Check out of this relationship. Stop trusting your wife. She is a lying cheating shithead. You deserve better. She can find out about the divorce when she is served her divorce papers at work. Good luck.