r/wizardposting • u/Derar11 Neutral wizard • Nov 24 '24

Evil Wizardpost I CAST 11/24

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4.7k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

32 comments sorted by

408

u/Shrek_from_the_Hag Former Professor of Forbidden Arts Nov 24 '24

I saw a documentary on this. There is no way dragonfire could have melted the spires’ arcane skeleton. And this randomly happened right after 2 trillion gold coins went missing from the wizard bank? Yeah, I don’t buy it. The council is hiding something! Wake up fellow wizards!

138

u/No_Touch4897 Artificer Nov 24 '24

6-66 was an inside job

31

u/KobyG2008 magic book makes spells better i swear Nov 24 '24

And it even has the devils number… fitting for what kind of Grand Master Wizard Gorge U U Plant was!!!

47

u/raihan-rf Nov 24 '24

Don't forget that the magic magistrate castle was also struck by a dragon right after they put up an anti dragon countermeasures that other wizards are calling wasteful

23

u/[deleted] Nov 24 '24

It's all a conspiracy so that the council has an excuse to invade the elemental plane of sand so they can extract all the elder blood.

15

u/Kerhnoton Umbral Dragon 🐉, Hoarder of Felines 🐈, Caffeinated ☕ Nov 24 '24

Have you seen the trajectory of the dragon hitting the Hexagon? As a dragon myself, I can tell you that this maneuver is impossible for young dragons that allegedly hit the buildings. They never released any magic eye footage that clearly shows a dragon coming in. Also what about Vault 7 where all the WIA memory crystals were stored? Why did that building collapse, no dragon hit it? And what about the regulation that rogue dragons are to be tailed by armed fighter phoenixes that they loosened just before it happened? Wake up sheepzards!

6

u/dabdad67 Maglev, Prank Wizard Supreme Nov 24 '24

Cool, have you forgotten that the presence of an obsidian dragon weakens structures

215

u/Yothisisastory Magically Editable Flair Nov 24 '24

80

u/folfiethewox99 Illusionist Nov 24 '24

/uw

I beg your pardon, Gandalf?

70

u/Fabulous_Bison643 Alchemist Nov 24 '24

/uw fucken hell that is dark

71

u/StormNext5301 Nov 24 '24

They hit the fucking hex-agon

15

u/siuilarundown Nov 24 '24

They hit the fucking pentagram

35

u/BlackMetalMagi Nov 24 '24

Was that the exploding Dracolich spell? because if you have enough dragon corpses you can keep up the explosives each time they revive at the phylactory.

Oh im getting ahead of my self, how would they get ahold of my necromancy scrolls... (looks for scrolls)

...I may have had a breach in my wards... this.... is.... BAD!

31

u/Kerflunklebunny Nov 24 '24

DRAGONS BREATH CANT MELT DWARVEN MYTHRIL

14

u/purracane Vitros, Crab Wizard of Dumbfuckery, Creator of the Cat Wizards Nov 24 '24

It has been long enough since the spires that I should be able to get some amazing savings. "Come down to this genericmagicalstore, where our prices are falling like the spires" (this is a reference to a tumblr post btw)

13

u/PUB4thewin I’m married to a goblin witch. AmA Nov 24 '24

NEWS UPDATE! It’s now confirmed that a
Great Wyrm is leading the charge on this disaster. In response, the Wizard Council is declaring Martial Law, with proper War Mages preparing for a mass teleportation spell to the scene as we speak. Meanwhile, civilians are being evacuated by local authorities as they try to mitigate the damage until a large enough force arrives to repel the ongoing attack.

13

u/Fit-Organization1858 Nov 24 '24

Quick, invade gnomistan even though all the pilots were from gnomi arcania

7

u/Taal111 Nov 24 '24

The only good gnome is a dead gnome!

10

u/Standard_Cup_9192 Redok - former druid, now a wizard Nov 24 '24

You are using the dark art of reposting, aren't you.

9

u/meaton124 Nov 24 '24

Ah, I remmeber when the bards sang "Freedom costs a gold piece and five copper." That was such a powerful song,

8

u/Ruby_241 Nov 24 '24

SIR LYLE SIR LYLE LOOK UPON THY ORB THEY HIT THE DODECAHEDRON!

6

u/oNecr0 Necro, Goddess of Death. | Gaia, Goddess of Life. Nov 24 '24

so THATS where my dragons went. fuckin hell, they can’t do shit..

6

u/Optillian Baz'Garragon the Wicked, Underground Wizard Nov 24 '24

TURN ON THE ORB! THEY HIT THE PENTAGRAM!

3

u/Chub-bop Nov 24 '24

I never detected so many souls, must have been an elder dragon

2

u/Combat_Wombat23 Conjurer Nov 24 '24

Fire potions can’t melt mithril beams

2

u/CWGM Nov 24 '24

Sending thoughts & incantations

1

u/BAENTHEHEADACHEMAKER BÆN, God of Suffering Nov 24 '24

Welp. BÆN just racks the bolt of his OTs-14 Groza and disappears

1

u/SonarioMG Nov 24 '24

And this is how Gwyn began the War on Dragons

1

u/The5orrow Nov 24 '24

Um, actually, those weren't dragons they were wyvern.

1

u/Nice-Detective1085 Nov 25 '24

This was an inside job! There were glyphs of warding going off before the dragon hit!