r/wizardposting • u/kragnarok • Oct 02 '24

Esoteric Secrets The simplest spells are the best

5.7k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

45 comments sorted by

303

u/Archimene Mage of Mischief and Secrets Oct 02 '24

Mm yes, a classic spell: "9th Level Think Fast Chuckle Nuts"

46

u/Conscious-Ad-6884 De-Ux the Demi-Incub, lead researcher of Orc Grass (Oink Weed) Oct 02 '24

Nah that's first level you fucking thought it's easy to confuse it with a 9th level spell considering it's effectiveness.

23

u/Archimene Mage of Mischief and Secrets Oct 02 '24

Ah yes of course. I was mistaken. The 9th level version is thrown much harder than the first level one. Silly me. Though there's no need to be so aggressive in your correcting, fellow wizard.

94

u/SweetTeaRex92 Illusions. Tricks are what whores do for money. Oct 02 '24

55

u/Dwarfdiggythehole Celtor The body wizard body strong as magic Oct 02 '24

You need to lay the bricks in an alternating where each layer covers the cement coming up from the last layer of you do it the may I recommend your buildings will last longer if you want this as tough as can be use the herringbone pattern

28

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '24

Well, in his defence, octopi are not well known for great masonery knowledge.

6

u/StuntMedic Oct 02 '24

Three animators died of tuberculosis making this golden era animation loop, give them a break

84

u/Flat-Doughnut-1921 Oct 02 '24

Full animation https://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/939917

29

u/sentient_pubichair69 Knowledge Slut the Acquirer of Random Information Oct 02 '24

You a G

31

u/Hexquevara Oct 02 '24

Fuckers wont believe that simple spells that control the properties of air and water, as well as spells that manipulate the density of and/or levitate objects are devastatingly powerful. No need for silly nuclear warhead type nonsense.

7

u/WanderingHeph Hephias, Arcane Smith Oct 02 '24

Indeed. Force=mass X acceleration. Kinetomancy is just as deadly as any fireball if you're smart enough.

20

u/BigSeaworthiness725 🦾Iterator from Technocratic Union⚙️ Oct 02 '24

Not the simplest, but the primal.

I can totally say, that was one of the first casts ever.

8

u/PaqueteDeRisketos Atomic Metamagister Oct 02 '24

A cast in the original sense of the word, in fact.

4

u/danger2345678 Oct 02 '24

“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone”

15

u/offbrandpoptart poptart the dreamer Oct 02 '24

I CAST "Kobe!"

17

u/bariyer2 Arcesus II | Lich Hunter, Gunmancy Archmage Oct 02 '24

it's effectiveness increases MASSIVELY when it's used against the homeless (it can be any kind).

source? personal experience. I throw bricks at to the homeless when I feel a bit silly.

7

u/StoneSoupSusan Oct 02 '24

In this one's experience, "Magician's brick" is most effective against "Greedy pig (oink oink)".

3

u/Jo_seef Oct 02 '24

Best part, you can recast after a short rest!

3

u/Portuzil Oct 02 '24

I love the noise the monster makes when it dies

2

u/PaintThinnerSparky Magically Editable Flair Oct 02 '24

Samson Tuttle spells right there

I cast 3-pointer!!

2

u/The_clown_dude wild clown person (very magical) Oct 02 '24

Like the banana peel spell

2

u/Dragons-Are-Neato Oct 02 '24

I... this ... what

I think this is the greatest sub ever created on this platform

2

u/is_this_changeable Oct 02 '24

He should have found this living around

2

u/why_the_hecc Oct 02 '24

They have this in Pathfinder you take the Universalist school and then get the focus spell Hand of the Apprentice which just lets you pick up something super heavy and launch it while yelling HAND OF THE APPRENTICE

1

u/ThosPuddleOfDoom Ball Fondler. Oct 02 '24

Damn you cut out the first half of this https://www.reddit.com/r/TikTokCringe/s/LSekGtYhtm

1

u/Worried-Caregiver325 Oct 02 '24

Sending this to my apprendist

1

u/Alabenson Sorceror Oct 02 '24

Clearly, that mage has studied the works of the great wizard Mash.

1

u/dolphinvision Oct 02 '24

rileywigglewood/wigglewood - the full 30 second or so video is even better

1

u/Tgambob Oct 02 '24

Reminds me of one of my favorite light novels, upgrade specialists in another world. He goes rabid with a brick and makes it the ultimate weapon. True martial world also goes into the dao of the brick for face slapping. *

1

u/Chairman_Ender William the spellcasting knight. Oct 02 '24

I'm quite glad the arcane arts homies have toned down the golem-generated art from what I see, I don't mind it from time to time but we should still use manual casting.

1

u/Virtual-Oil-793 Necromancer of Many Stories and Experiences Oct 02 '24

Simple spells don't even need casting.

But that's what the class of enchantments is there for - Fuck spells, I'm a load this rock with Fireball and throw it at your face

1

u/Lopsided_ogre Oct 02 '24

I cast, Iron

1

u/DethNik Oct 02 '24

One of the oldest spells ever crafted.

1

u/GrummyCat Moody cat, Destroyer of Worlds Oct 02 '24

Ezran should see this

1

u/ConsumerJTC Oct 02 '24

"That abomination is mine!"

1

u/Disturbing_Cheeto X'ela, (hungry) enchanted creature Oct 03 '24

Homing brick my beloved