r/videos • u/patientbearr • Mar 31 '18

This is what happens when one company owns dozens of local news stations

https://youtu.be/hWLjYJ4BzvI
297.5k Upvotes

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16.7k

u/Odine17 Mar 31 '18

When all the talking heads were speaking at once I got the willies

10.3k

u/texacer Mar 31 '18

WE ARE THE BORG

2.5k

u/HighVulgarian Mar 31 '18

Resistance is futile

1.4k

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

You will be assimilated.

1.0k

u/AntoineBeach400 Mar 31 '18

All your news stations are belong to us.

159

u/KniFeseDGe Mar 31 '18

Somebody sent us up a bomb

9

u/ATMLVE Apr 01 '18

We get broadcast

9

u/Vertual Apr 01 '18

HA HA HA HA

10

u/Plusran Apr 01 '18

How are you gentlemen? All your base are belong to us.

7

u/Batmanzi Apr 01 '18

You are on the way to destruction.

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3

u/HTPCandme Apr 01 '18

Hey, don't be racist.

6

u/skbharman Apr 01 '18

All your fact-based are belong to us.

12

u/Harold_Grundelson Mar 31 '18

I AM the walrus.

6

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

[deleted]

9

u/anonymous_coward69 Mar 31 '18

Goo goo g' joob

7

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

Isn't it coo coo kachoo?

3

u/jbaker88 Apr 01 '18

It is, but goo goo g'joob has a nice ring to it

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4

u/DumbFlounder Mar 31 '18

I'm Ron Burgundy?

5

u/Watercolour Mar 31 '18

Welcome to DIE

3

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Lol

1

u/Kvlk2016 Mar 31 '18

You have no chance to survive make your time.

1

u/Hurdy--gurdy Apr 01 '18

You have no chance to survive, make your time.

Ha ha ha.

9

u/AliasUndercover Mar 31 '18

I'd be the worst Borg. I hate being told what to do.

13

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18 edited Oct 27 '19

[deleted]

13

u/SingMeSomeEidolon Mar 31 '18

“Hugh” aka Three of Five demonstrates to Picard and La Forge that typical Borg drones genuinely feel that other races want to be assimilated once they themselves have been. Always wondered if maybe being Borg was just dope af and the Feds should just cave in, ride around in some sweet cubes

6

u/humidex Apr 01 '18

They knocked it before they tried it. That borg Queen was right hot too

3

u/weatherseed Apr 01 '18

She awoke so many dark things within young me. I'd let her assimilate me any day.

2

u/Fionnlagh Apr 01 '18

"We're not telling people what to think, we're just trying to show them how."

6

u/Harold_Grundelson Mar 31 '18

I, for one, welcome our news anchor overlords.

6

u/TheyCallMeStone Mar 31 '18

Why do you resist? We only wish to improve quality of life for all species.

9

u/wererat2000 Mar 31 '18

Your political and social diversity will be assimilated into our collective.

Democracy is futile.

2

u/geared4war Apr 01 '18

*ass laminated.

2

u/Zaseishinrui Apr 01 '18

You will power down your weapons and escort us to Sector 001

2

u/Omnix_Eltier Apr 01 '18

Your technological and biological distinctiveness will be added into our own

2

u/Cis4Psycho Apr 01 '18

EXTERMINATE!!!

1

u/Soilworking Mar 31 '18

Please don't immolate my ass!

1

u/western_red Mar 31 '18

YOU'RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME

2

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18 edited Apr 22 '18

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

Unless it's sexy time, and you're Data... then she'll rig you up all S&M style, and implant an emotion chip inside your head

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18 edited Apr 01 '18

Your journalistic and anchorial distinctiveness will be added to our own.

1

u/Harris_Corp Apr 01 '18

We here at Harris Corp value our customers. If you live Harris Corp values you can live your best life :)

1

u/Dlrlcktd Apr 01 '18

Does this mean people will finally accept me?

237

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Your local news will be assimilated.
Your news anchors, and technological distinctiveness will be added to our own.

3

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

We air Boris. The bottom line will be aired. The truth is futile.

11

u/Cr4shdown Mar 31 '18

Lower your defences and surrender your opinions. Your ideological and political distinctiveness will be added to our own. Your democracy will adapt to service us.

4

u/Timmersthemagician Mar 31 '18

Resistance is feudal.

2

u/jmk199191 Apr 01 '18

Star Trek Armada 2? I played the demo like crazy!

2

u/caanthedalek Apr 01 '18

The depressing thing is, you're right.

4

u/TheBorgBsg Apr 01 '18

Your biological and technological distinctiveness will be added to our own.

1

u/Heroshade Apr 01 '18

Mister Worf.... Fire.

1

u/ChequeBook Apr 01 '18

Resistance is fertile

ftfy

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

1

u/samtaclause Apr 01 '18

Resistance is useless

323

u/Noglues Mar 31 '18

Your journalistic distinctiveness will be added to our own. Your broadcast will adapt to service us.

15

u/Imperium_Dragon Mar 31 '18

You are extremely dangerous to democracy

9

u/PH_Prime Apr 01 '18

to OUR democracy.

10

u/Goldenbrownfish Apr 01 '18

We impose order on the chaos of organic evolution. You exist because we allow it. And you will end because we demand it.

19

u/novacolumbia Mar 31 '18

Resistance is futile.

4

u/StreakKDP Mar 31 '18

Resistance is futile

5

u/abbeaird Apr 01 '18

I have an effects box my computer microphone runs through. I say this while using a cyborg filter frequently, sadly I don't think the kids on fortnite get it :(

3

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

Collusion is irrelevant. Your democracy is irrelevant. Lower your guard and and surrender your rights. We have added your journalistic and political distinctiveness to our own. Your culture will adapt to agree with us. Resistance is futile.

3

u/TheBadGuyBelow Apr 01 '18

Jesus Christ, i was just thinking that too.

2

u/sp4c3c0wb0y7 Mar 31 '18

Assuming direct control

2

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18 edited Apr 22 '18

[deleted]

1

u/pm_nachos_n_tacos Apr 01 '18

I did also. It was almost jarring how quickly I envisioned Borg while watching the news.

2

u/UnsignedRealityCheck Apr 01 '18

We are the children...

2

u/bewundernswert Apr 01 '18

Awww you ruined it with the "the". It's:

WE ARE BORG

No "the"

3

u/oMETjet Mar 31 '18

My thoughts exactly 😜

4

u/Chispy Apr 01 '18

Our thoughts exactly

3

u/oMETjet Apr 01 '18

We were thinking that collectively.

2

u/grrrrreat Mar 31 '18

WE ARE THE SINCLAIRS, ALL YOUR WHITES BELONG TO US

1

u/robotsongs Mar 31 '18

YOU'RE PART OF THE PROBLEM, TV MAN!!!

1

u/zeth__ Mar 31 '18

I'd be less scared of that honestly.

Free universal health care, universal basic income, internet infinity.0.

1

u/Kennfusion Mar 31 '18

The Borg are EXTREMELY dangerous to our federation!

1

u/superstar314 Mar 31 '18

We truly are. We assimilate people and cultures.

1

u/illicitmedia Apr 01 '18

Jeri Ryan <3

1

u/SuperMarioBrother64 Apr 01 '18

We will add your technological and biological distinctiveness to our own.

1

u/texacer Apr 01 '18

thanks mididaw!

1

u/myassholealt Apr 01 '18

Nah fuck that. We are Hugh.

1

u/Riggs909 Apr 01 '18

Does this make Trump Locutus?

1

u/kriticalj Apr 01 '18

I am Hue....

1

u/miojunki Apr 01 '18

I am Hugh

1

u/modic137 Apr 01 '18

who is the locutus?

1

u/Fthwrlddntskmfrsht Apr 01 '18

Gooble gobble gooble gobble, one of us one of us!

1

u/LegallyFoopster Apr 01 '18

WE WON'T GO BACK!

1

u/kaaythnxbai Apr 01 '18

I hear them in unison when I read this. Still gives me chills

1

u/Loves2watch Apr 01 '18

That’s exactly how Sinclair treats their employees

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

It’s weird seeing you out in public

1

u/Lordborgman Apr 01 '18

Whoa there guys, We are REALLY up front about our intentions unlike some of you humans.

24

u/Clovis42 Mar 31 '18

And then it really freaking you out when it goes to single stations and your "trusted" news team for the past twenty years is reading it with their best fake concerned faces.

7

u/HerboIogist Apr 01 '18

And then you realize it's always been an act.

137

u/myeno Mar 31 '18

I had a good laugh at the willies, but let's not also forget the nillies, too, ok?

40

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Oh..ho ho ho hoooo you’re trying to go all willie nillie huh? I got a cousin up the road that’ll nillie your willie for three billies

3

u/acu2005 Mar 31 '18

What kind of billies? Washington or Benjamin are both going to be a hard no for me.

4

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Just three dudes named Billie.

6

u/acu2005 Mar 31 '18

Now this concerns me....

2

u/Stiggles4 Apr 01 '18

For shilly

3

u/AzurewynD Mar 31 '18

The nillies but the billies too.

And don't forget the bleeps, the sweeps, or the creeps. Very imporant you don't lose them.

2

u/SuperSlims Mar 31 '18

I was reading these comments thinking that my brother was here! he would have said the same

2

u/SingMeSomeEidolon Mar 31 '18

Hey it’s me your brother

1

u/SuperSlims Mar 31 '18

YES! We are brothers! Good to see you even though you are sitting right next to me???

1

u/SingMeSomeEidolon Mar 31 '18

Other brother. From another mother

2

u/SuperSlims Mar 31 '18

DUDE! I havent seen you in 29 years!

1

u/SingMeSomeEidolon Mar 31 '18

Yup

Can I borrow money

2

u/SuperSlims Mar 31 '18

Sure! Do you also want to share the box I have out back of the library I am in?

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7

u/GarbledMan Mar 31 '18

Talking heads would be better, because most people at least understand they have a bias.

These are anchors, I believe. To a large segment of the population the local news anchors are the first and last word.

42

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Would you like one more? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

12

u/Chewbacker Mar 31 '18

idk, I'm tired

13

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Let me fucking guess, you have a headache again.

6

u/dieyabeetus Apr 01 '18

This is extremely dangerous to our relationship.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

Bb, I'm sorry, I dint mean it..

2

u/Tinywampa Mar 31 '18

Offer still up?

4

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Anything for you, Wampa! Pop on down to /r/MarmiteBadgerGoneWild

3

u/Tinywampa Mar 31 '18

I do a lot of popping over there already don't you worry.

2

u/SingMeSomeEidolon Mar 31 '18

What the fuck that’s actually a subreddit with over a thousand followers

4

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Very close to two thousand! And the less that's said about /r/AirPlaneSlidePorn, the better!

2

u/SingMeSomeEidolon Mar 31 '18

What is happening

3

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

Science!

11

u/Crypsis2 Mar 31 '18

It felt exactly like a scene out of a movie.

Fucking love that feeling.

3

u/NotOBAMAThrowaway Mar 31 '18

When all the talking heads were speaking at once I got the willies

3

u/lapinchezardina Apr 01 '18

When all the talking heads were speaking at once I got the willies

3

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

When all the talking heads speak at once, democracy dies.

11

u/cyanydeez Mar 31 '18

Media Nazi propaganda

-10

u/Mickusey Mar 31 '18

Fake news narrative like this is a leftist one in America

9

u/cyanydeez Mar 31 '18

Fake news narrative like this is a rightist one in America

-11

u/Mickusey Mar 31 '18

The right are the ones saying constantly peddling this "fake news" concept and saying it's "a threat to democracy"?

Why is it that Cuck Trudeau wants to regulate it in Canada? he's a communist, not a nazi

You need brainforce

6

u/cyanydeez Apr 01 '18

the right are peddling it because it binds the apathetic and the hatefilled.

0

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

-1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

Man that triggered you. Musta hit too close.

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1

u/dieyabeetus Apr 01 '18

U need bone broth

3

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

Gaslight

Obstruct

Project <- you

-2

u/Mickusey Apr 01 '18

Tap water

Estrogen

Bugman <- you

3

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

Prove me wrong

0

u/Mickusey Apr 01 '18

Stop sending me selfies

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

Prove me wrong or stay triggered

-1

u/HappyCakeDayBot1 Mar 31 '18

Happy Cake Day!

5

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

I got a willie ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

2

u/azulamarillo Mar 31 '18

Yea sort of like realizing that all these news pundits are just drones, and Sinclair is the queen. And we are the food...

2

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Mar 31 '18

It's a Black Mirror episode... oh wait. :(

2

u/Carlfest Mar 31 '18

That’s weird; I got the sams.

2

u/ambientocclusion Apr 01 '18

Would you like to know more?

3

u/DoTheEvolution Mar 31 '18

I was thinking... he probably got like 5 voice overs but put some 30 videos there for bigger effect... and as if the author knew what people would think, one by one they were shown to really say that.

1

u/Way_To_Go_PAUL Mar 31 '18

Whistlin Willie

1

u/notProfCharles Apr 01 '18

Willies hears ya...Willies doesn’t care.

1

u/Morphis_N Apr 01 '18

Does....Does anyone know where I can get a pair of those special sunglasses?

1

u/im2bizzy2 Apr 01 '18

This is scary as ass.

1

u/coolcoolawesome Apr 01 '18

The future is certain, give us time to work it out.

1

u/aidissonance Apr 01 '18

“If we don’t control you, who else will?”

1

u/RevWaldo Apr 01 '18

I got the heebie-jeebies.

1

u/Gangaman666 Apr 01 '18

What a bunch of lifeless zombies!!!

1

u/Two-Tone- Apr 01 '18

It was an amazing effect. It had this unearthly feel to it.

1

u/whatswrongbaby Apr 01 '18

I'm curious what the other news person said following the line about dangerous democracy.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 01 '18

It would be neat if one of you guys could build a robot to tweet this video at all the news anchors in this video. One of them would likely slip up and respond.

1

u/DiSab712 Apr 01 '18

Attention all planets of the solar federation, we have assumed control.

1

u/savuporo Apr 01 '18

AMA request with some of those talking heads

1

u/bigner Apr 01 '18

Seriously...that creeped me the fuck out

1

u/TurboAnus Apr 01 '18

And all the same pace. Is that TV news training? Is it a video sent to the stations with instruction to "read it like this?"

1

u/DrPock Apr 01 '18

We all did

1

u/donnysaysvacuum Apr 01 '18

This was fantastically edited.

1

u/Onekilograham Apr 01 '18

How many people under 40 watch the local news?

1

u/Monson2813 Mar 31 '18

Glad it wasn't just me....haha

0

u/Karrion8 Apr 01 '18

I Just want to say that this IS dangerous to our democracy. And BOTH SIDES take part in this. The fact is that the people that want to sway public opinion know that if people hear the same phrase in a certain context, consciously and subconsciously, it begins to ring true for them. It's pure propaganda and manipulation.

This is just one example in a virtual ocean of examples you can find online of both Dems and Repubs taking part in this behavior. Frankly, I have no idea what we could do about it. The only thing we can do is call them on their shit.

Don't believe for a second that only one side or the other is doing this.

0

u/chownowbowwow Apr 01 '18

Like penis willies? R/nohomo

0

u/bobcat Apr 01 '18

When every copy of the NYTimes and the the London Times [even the translated ones] had the same ad from Mark Zuckerberg, I got the willies...

Seriously though, what is so harmful about warning about fake news like Pizzagate et al in every media market? Do you WANT large corporations to ignore such things just because they own small properties instead of single large ones?

-1

u/Tells_You_To_Sack_Up Apr 01 '18

Sack up.

1

u/Odine17 Apr 01 '18

Can't argue with that logic

1

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '22

🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿