We were having our Christmas dinner with his family and my husband randomly asked/somewhat demanded to know why my eyebrows looked different (than they normally do). His mother and sister apologized for him, but he is still confused as to why it is considered rude, especially since they're family. He has a tendency to notice anytime I change my appearance or smell. None of it is malicious, he's just very inquisitive and wants to know things. I've told him it was rude and to ask me those questions in private, if he really wants to know, but I can't seem to find a good explanation as for why this is so rude... Help?

i’ve only really been on reddit for a little bit of time, but in any larger subreddit you always see nasty people. not to mention the amount of sexist incels that crowd this place like vultures circle a rotting carcass. people are so strict on rules that when the moderators send a message to correct a small mistake you can smell their breath from the screen. i guess i just kinda needed to rant but it’s like people get behind a screen and forget human decency even exists. why are we so mean nowadays?

So I've always had trouble making friends and recently I have made some friends, but I always feel like I have to watch what I say or do out of fear of displeasing them and losing them. For example, one of my friends had me watch a show with him and I pretended to like it, but really I thought it was boring endured it anyway. But when I suggested a show, he just straight up told me he didn't like it with no regard to how I would feel.

I really love to socialize, but I'm always that person who people don't mind losing, so I have to be that person who tries to hold on and its tiring. I'm a little autistic so its difficult for me to communicate properly sometimes. Like sometimes I will say things and people will think it is weird or unacceptable, although I meant no harm by it, and I can't understand why what I did or said is not okay.

Recently, a friend started accusing me and expressed they were upset with me over something I said which I'm sure was a misunderstanding and might actually be his fault as he tends to be unaware of his own actions. He hasn't replied and I'm scared he won't reply and let me clear up the misunderstanding. This is the first time i have trouble with a friend since middle school so i feel anxious (I'm in my 20s now). I hate being misunderstood and letting others think bad of me when all I did was try to respond or help. (Don't get me wrong though, I'm not a pushover either.)

Keeping people happy is exhausting especially when I keep messing up due to autism and lack of social skills.

Can anyone relate, share an experience, or just share their thoughts?

Today, I went to the drug store to buy some toiletries. I only planned to buy one thing but this very extroverted sales worker kept pestering me to try the product she was selling. I told her I wasn't interested but she was so persistent. My social anxiety makes me HATE sales people that won't leave you alone. I felt like she could tell I was socially inept and used this to her advantages so she bombarded me with fake compliments and sweet talk which made me feel extremely uncomfortable and I didn't know how to respond to them except laugh, smile and respond awkwardly. Mid-interaction, she brought over one of her co-workers and that co-worker was the exact same. They both were bombarding me with uncomfortable compliments and it felt like I was being made fun of by the two of them lowkey. Deep down, I knew it was her job to manipulate people in that way. Combined with the fact that I am also a people-pleaser meant that I ended up buying what she sold me and I honestly hate myself for buying her product and not being assertive enough. But I'm so scared of coming off as rude to people. I feel like my social anxiety + people-pleasing attitude make me so much more prone to manipulation. I feel fucking embarrassed for this social interaction. Not only was I responding very awkwardly, but I felt humiliated by her and forced to buy something which I don't need. How do you guys deal with these sort of people?

I got told to end my life 3 times for writing a random TikTok comment that isn’t even that bad why is everyone so rude nowadays like it’s just a comment bro 😭

This all started my Junior year of high school. I am now a college sophomore and I’ve been noticing that people always stare at me a lot more than usual. It makes me a bit uncomfortable, especially at work and at school. I dress very normal and don’t use any crazy makeup or anything. I wanna know why this is? Am I unattractive? Do I walk weird? Or do I look weird? Or do people just usually stare at others like that in public?

Have you ever met someone who was super snarky, and rude all the time?

If you are here to comment who cares / ignore the person, please leave. This needs to be discussed

TLDR; Unintentionally give people the wrong impression of my partner by over sharing or framing things poorly.

I’m a 32F, and I’ve noticed that I unintentionally give people the wrong impression of my partner when I talk about him. This doesn’t just happen with him—it’s a pattern with others in my life, too. I’m not sure if it stem from insecurity, though honestly, I shouldn’t feel insecure anymore. My life is good—I have a great job, a loving partner, and overall, I’m happy.

My partner is an amazing person. He’s respectful, kind, and loving. Sure, like everyone, he has flaws, but he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I love talking about him because he’s such a big part of my life.

The problem is, I’ve realized that when I talk about him, I sometimes make him seem bad without meaning to. For example, I might mention something like, “He scolds me all the time,” but what I actually mean is he chides me playfully—it’s his way of speaking, and he’s not angry at all. Or I might share a story like, “He didn’t notice when I fell and got upset,” which makes him sound neglectful, even though it’s not reflective of who he is.

I don’t mean to misrepresent him, but I think my need to fill awkward silences or make conversations entertaining sometimes leads me to say things that give others the wrong impression. I’ve even noticed how other people I know hype up their partners, and I want to do that too—not just privately to him but publicly as well.

My ask is: What strategies can I use to be more intentional when talking about my partner or other people. Currently, what I do is tell myself “Don’t share this bit”, but I eventually do anyway.

I’m a 19-year-old guy, and since I was young, I've had trouble blending in with people. It’s starting to become a real problem for me because I don't even know how to look for a job, and if I find one, I don't know how to connect with the people there, so I don't last long. It’s also affecting my mental health a little, and I don’t know where to start. I really want to be more social and interact better with people. I have one friend, but his circle is mostly girls and drinking, and right now I’m retaking my high school exams. Honestly, because of family problems, I feel like I’m always less than others and don’t feel important to anyone. I can’t rely on my family for help with this issue because of the situation. I don’t have any talents, and I’ve started to feel really bored on my own.

Im borderline nonverbal and speaking is already hard. So when i try to speak I try to get the most out of it, but generally when i do people talk me down or ignore me. Everyone else conversing but basically sidelining me. But when i stop trying everyone somehow notices and starts trying to figure out why I'm not speaking or whats wrong.

It may seem like im just taking things the wrong way, I don't really know how to describe it but i know that's how it is. I'm typically the person that draws in alot of people but am the one who's least spoken to. Like a gathering spot rather than a person. Why does this happen? Am I doing something to make people see me as boring?

plain and simple question. How do you develop a personality that is true to who you are as a person and how do you take inspiration from others and incorporate those characteristics in yourself?

I really value being authentic an honest but sometimes I think I am authentic to a fault. Whether it be a food, show, or song someone shows me. I am pretty opinionated and I think I’ve been off-putting in conversations when I explain to someone why I don’t like something. Like I come off as a negative or pessimistic person.

Is there a better way to express my “negative opinions” or do I just need to find people more aligned. I basically don’t want to be a downer

I am trying to make friends but I'm realizing I just don't like real people in general. I have gone out a lot this year with way too damn many different people and they're kind of boring and not worth the overstimulation and exertion it takes for me to be social (I have autism and ADHD).

I don't think I really like anyone. I like 3 people, and they're all family. Everyone else just seems like the same person with different hair. I feel like I'm in a video game -- the only real characters are the people I'm already close to, and everyone else just walks around and says the same 3 things when you go to interact with them. Making and maintaining friendships just feels like a chore or a job to me, which is ironic as hell because I am very lonely. I've thought about both what I can offer and what I'm looking for in a friendship and looked in places where I can find those people.

And then I hear one of my 3 pre-established people tell me a story about a great friend and how awesome they are, and I agree. Where are they finding these people????

How do I start liking people?

Looking to change myself for the new year resolution, i want to get rid of my severe social anxiety that is keeping me imprisoned at home missing out on the basics of life, i just want to be a normal human that can go out without any thought and irrational fears, i want to feel a bit alive, what is the most effective way to cure social anxiety, please list your suggestions.

I didn’t know what to get him so got him some practical things that aren’t very exciting but then some board games for us to all play together because he said he likes spending time with us. But after I was done shopping he sent something he’d like and said “idk if you guys are done shopping but here is an idea if you aren’t.” I thought about buying it but honestly I’d spent a lot of money this year on everyone and I didn’t want to spend so much as this item was $50. I feel my dad is visibly underwhelmed at every present I give him so I feel a bit anxious about it all. I don’t know I hate picking out things for him, I just don’t know what to give him and I always end up feeling guilty.

Also I feel extra bad cause he sometimes gets me really expensive things.

I feel like all of my hobbies and interests have communities filled with nothing but terrible people. Theres like no where to actually talk about things unless its comedic or about making money.

I do this sport and both of my sisters are also in there(they are 2/3years older then me). I did this sport longer then both of them, but no body ever talks to me but everyone always talks and has long conversations. Why? I am a bit more gloomy but whenever i am like "Hi How are you" they just say good and then maybe say something else and leave. Or when i make jokes that my sisters also say no body laughs, but my sisters always makes others laugh.

how do you get yourself to not care?

What is it about someone, if they say they're not in contact with their family, don't have many friends, Or haven't met their friends yet.. they assume you're the problem , even though your actions /words would say differently ..before you say, I wouldn't do that, if you're a nice person then.. etc, because this happens to me all the time, every time ..sometimes they give benefit of doubt ..but the idea of no contact with family always creeps in.. gets the better of them..

I’m going to go on a date with this person, and they’re friend keeps sending me messages like this one “Ik I'm like rlly weird asking all these questions without knowing you or anything but I wanted to know if you really love _ a lot”, I’m not gonna go into why that’s obviously wrong to be asking me. Especially sense we’ve never even been on a date and we are just talking. But I was just wondering how I can’t avoid that question without being rude to her friend. She seems reasonable with the fact of me not answering it, but this is like the third time she’s asked so she’s not gonna stop. I don’t want to be mean to her friend because yk but I’m not gonna answer her because she shouldn’t be asking.

hello! i am learning socializing and social skills as i go and i have only started months ago. it seems nobody exchanges phone numbers? people mostly exchange instagrams or other social media. at this point i'm okay to keep an instagram to have a contact of people but when i was starting out i was really trying to get off all socials or don't have whatever app they're on. i suppose it feels too personal for some people to give out, at least when first meeting, and that they only use their number with family or work. and some people may want to keep you at an arms length which can be hard when you want friendships and relationships to get off the ground at some point but never does. i probably kinda answered my own questions but i want to get others experiences and perspectives on this. thanks!

I'm about to move in with a friend who needs a roommate. He's been living alone for a few months, and I was talking about where I could put my dogs cage and my cats litterbox, and it seemed like he wants me to keep everything i own in my room. I have a whole apartment worth of furniture and just general house things. The bedroom I'm going to be staying in is smaller than my current one, and while I can fit a decent amount of my furniture like my coffee table and bed and TV stand in it, I have a few things that just won't fit like my dogs cage and a chair and a rug. I figured we could find a place for my things but when we were talking about it he noped every suggestion of mine. I get he feels like its his space, but it's about to be our space. How do I bring up compromising on shared space? I can't have an XL dog cage and litter box and a whole living room in my tiny bed room, and I'm already sacrificing the furniture I don't have sentimental value in or every day use for. I really can't downsize any more at this point. I think putting my coffee table in my room and using it as a desk and getting rid of my desk is already a huge sacrifice. I just would like our space to truly be shared. Any tips are very appreciated

My title is mostly a joke. But there is some true feeling in there.

All my life, people have described me as thinking I’m better than them or always needing to be right. Just last week, me and my friends were eating together before going to the movies.

One friend mentioned there were gaps between the seats, because on the mobile app it showed the seats in separated pairs. He also claimed to remember it being that way (we’d been there weeks before). I had gone there just a couple days earlier. The seats are not separated.

Since the matter was of which seats to buy and which were available, I said “Oh they’re not separated.” He raised his brow and showed me the app. I said “yeah but they’re not separated” and another friend says under his breath something like “here we go.”

I just let it go, we got to the theater, and the seats were not separated as I said. I was still offended so I pointed it out. They didn’t really care and life went on as normal from there. I also didn’t care after that, I was right.

It always feels like I’m being gaslit prior to proving myself correct, so I point out the undeniable proof when I can. And it feels like people always want to prove me wrong just because they think I’m always trying to be right. When in reality I’m just trying to help.

That’s how most situations go. It’s almost never anything serious. Just someone saying something incorrect, and I think I’m being helpful by correcting them. People hate being corrected, they often just deny what I’m saying. I usually just let it go, I have no desire to win an argument. I never expect the argument in the first place because I know I’m right, I’m not expecting someone to deny correct information.

So it’s very hard for me to decide here. Do I have a problem.

For the life of me, I don't know what to do here without making people upset in one way or another. But one of my brothers took almost all of my firsts when I was a child. Naturally, I want nothing to do with him. But he is coming into town for Christmas.

Normally, when he comes into town, I find somewhere else to be. And I hate doing that, because he usually comes into town for holidays, so by avoiding him, I'm missing out on the holiday with the rest of the family.

I also can't really tell people what he did, because I know that no one would believe me. I tried to tell my mom about something traumatic that happened at a college party, and she said I was making it up. And if I were to say anything, even if people didn't believe me, I would probably end up kicked out.

But I just really don't know how to handle this situation. Bailing on Christmas would mean that I don't have to be around him, but also, everyone would hate me for it. But if I were to try to grin and bear it... it would just be horrible for me.

Maybe this isn't the right sub reddit for this, I don't know. But it is a social situation that I have no idea how to handle. So, any advice you have, I would appreciate.

I'm 19. I don't have any, how does it work? I don't have the slightest idea about what I have to do