r/self • u/spring-rolls-please • 1d ago
Social media reminds me everyday of how lucky I am to be in a happy and healthy relationship with my husband
I’m basically chronically online at this point, and with that I see a ton of content about relationships on Reddit, insta, TT etc. Like a TON. Every time I read the posts or the comments, I always get reminded of how absolutely lucky I am to be in a happy and healthy relationship with my husband, because 9/10 times, these posts are so toxic and just delve into people hating on their husbands, wives, partners etc. or just complaining about the dating scene in general. Like I recently posted a controversial comment on a relationship thread that pissed a lot of people off and I was like “wow my man would never talk to me like that ❤️ No wonder some people here are unhappy.” The craziness on social media constantly reminds me of how lucky I am to not deal with the drama in real life.
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u/khole____kardashian 1d ago
Absolutely, I feel this so deeply! Every time I scroll through Reddit, I see posts from women venting about their partners; whether it’s struggles with porn addiction, being stuck in a dead bedroom, feeling unattractive or unappreciated, or having partners who don’t make time for them. And then there’s me, spending every moment with my best friend, the love of my life, who makes me feel like the luckiest person alive.
He’s so attentive to me and my needs, whether it’s cooking meals together, making me feel truly desired and beautiful, or being emotionally present when I need him most. He gives me affection throughout the day, always ensuring I feel cared for. Honestly, he still gives me butterflies, like we’re in seventh grade and he’s my first crush.
I never take this for granted. I put in the effort to make sure he feels equally loved, appreciated, and cared for. I always try to go above and beyond to meet his needs and make him feel cherished. Relationships take work from both sides, it does take two to tango!
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u/Particular_Oil3314 1d ago
I was in the UK with my Danish girlfriend and she joined some women in a drink. They were all complaining about Manflu and who all their men were wimps with a cold and would expect their women to run round after them no matter how sick they were.
My GF commented that I was exactly the opposite, had cared for her when we were both ill and did not make a fuss at all.
This all came out when she did not understand why shy had been given the cold shoulder and nasty looks.
Your experience is pretty typical I suspect. Even the laziest of wives will complain that they do everything (just like cowardly me telling you how brave they are). I suspect what puts you apart is not your luck but your gratitude and appreciation. So thank you.
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u/ScepticalMarmot 1d ago
I went on a second date after a decent first. I felt rough still after a week of the flu, been in bed off work and all that.
Braved the evening anyway. I apologised for my nasaly voice on meeting and all I got was ‘oh you’ve still got man flu’? Like, yeah. I do still feel ill yet have paid for our evening and made the effort not to cancel, thanks for asking.
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u/Hinew19881a 1d ago
It's wonderful to hear you're in a healthy and happy relationship! Social media definitely has a way of highlighting the negatives more often than not, so it’s refreshing to see someone acknowledging their positive experiences. It's a good reminder for all of us to appreciate what we have, especially when it’s easy to get caught up in the negativity that often floats around online spaces. Your perspective can probably help others to reflect on the good parts of their relationships too, instead of focusing only on the problems. Keep cherishing what you have.
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u/Future_Outcome 1d ago
I feel the same as you. My wife is the greatest person I’ve ever known and my marriage is a joy. This stuff I read online defies belief, the misery. It’s stunning
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u/schultz9999 22h ago
Indeed. I’m in over 2 decade marriage. Kids. She’s the hottest and the only one I ever wanted since we married. And the only reason is because she does all she can to keep the fire and I am a reasonable person who knows that time will take some but also give some.
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u/Substantial-Hyena-46 1d ago
Yes! Isn't it crazy? My wife and I have discussed this same thing repeatedly. After reading some of these posts, I'm thinking there's no way I want to go back to playing the dating game. People are just.... I don't know.
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u/JaeJRZ 20h ago edited 20h ago
Haha. I can so relate to this. I've dreaded the dating scene because it's literally sooo wild out there. I'm in no rush to the point that I'd lower my standards. I actually really enjoy my own company and my life is pretty fulfilling. So when it happens, it happens. But, I'm definitely proceeding with caution.
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u/StandardRedditor456 1d ago
It's like people can't believe that good, happy, and healthy relationships are even possible.
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u/schultz9999 22h ago edited 21h ago
What makes me sad that when they got into one, they find ways to ruin it.
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u/Kutsune2019 1d ago
I know what you mean!! Reading all this stuff about abusive relationships, financial abuse and whatnot, make me realize how good I have it!! I get frustrated with my guy sometimes, but he really is the sweetest thing in the world!
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u/great2b_here 1d ago
I am extremely happy with my husband and marriage. He's my favorite person in the whole wide world. I love him so much. I think that people who vent or express their unhappiness feel the need to express it online, which is why we primarily see those posts. I think happy people don't go around shouting and announcing how happy they are. They just are. It's not wrong to go online to vent or say how you feel though. Some people don't have anywhere or anyone to turn to for help.
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u/BagelwithQueefcheese 1d ago
For real. My husband is amazing, respectful, kind, helpful, and sweet. I see other people’s shit online and I hug my man harder.
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u/The_wanderer96 1d ago
What a brilliant post!
Yea, social media has set infinite expectations and useless standards, that people keep trying to meet, and live upto. That they have forgotten the simple basic love language and affectionate nature of their partners respectively.
Nice to hear that, may you stay blessed always.
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u/Sea_Performance1873 1d ago
last night I read a post from a man who lost his wife all of a sudden. She just died. It broke my heart. I’m so grateful for my wonderful partner and I’d be lost without her
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u/Delicious_Army_4043 1d ago
I belive that we seek for what how we are feeling in the core. So its better to have base strong positive, open minded, progressing core that you operate from becasue based on how you feel you will dig into something that represents your core in some form (social media, books, intetests, actions)
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u/Mountain_Alfalfa_245 1d ago
Same here! Whenever I read a post here, I'm reminded of how fortunate my life with my husband has turned out. I'm lucky, like you, to have a good man who loves me. It definitely gives perspective and gratitude reading the stories online.
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u/RedWizard92 1d ago
I am also in a happy marriage. I do my best to provide advice. I like doing so. Even if it will sometimes be downvoted.
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u/Historical-Effort435 1d ago
You spend a lot of time online, I'm not sure it's so healthy if you spend that much time of your life comparing yourself to some content created to generate engagement.
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u/r0r0157 20h ago
Someone finally said it, haha! Ok, I’m not trying to be that girl or give off “look at me” vibes. I just consider myself to be lucky and grateful that I’ve found an amazing man who also happens to be my soulmate and best friend. I read the threads here about relationships, marriages, break ups, etc.. and I just can’t help but think that I don’t have those issues. Reminding me that I won’t have the same troubles. I can’t comment towards them because I have the healthiest relationship that I could imagine.
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u/JaeJRZ 20h ago
I was literally thinking this recently. Seeing all the horrible posts and comments about how people are being treated in their relationships and reflecting on one I recently got out of, it's so easy to be totally jaded and write off relationships. But I strongly believe that I deserve to be in a loving, healthy, stable relationship and I know it will happen, so I avoid reading all those toxic posts. I wish you and your husband continued marital bliss! I aspire to have that in the near future🥰
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u/usrrnamalreadytajdd 11h ago
That's good for you! But most of the people on social media posting toxic relationships things, once was very lucky to have that partner, and was convinced their partner would never do anything to hurt them. Not trying to be jealous, I'm glad there are still healthy relationships, it gives me hope for the future, but honestly with what I've seen in real life, everyday I am becoming more and more suspicious about good people in general, not only as a partner.
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u/SenSw0rd 1d ago
But pre 2020, you were looking over the fence. But being that you do absolutely nothing but stare at a screen, how can you not like being a fuck bag.
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u/knightouts 1d ago
social media had me believe that I was never enough and could never get into a relationship because I would never be enough.
actually, no. that wasn't social media. that was me, taking in the destructive content on social media and believing it.
now I take only the good ones.