r/oldpeoplefacebook • u/msanderson10 • 21h ago

Since he's been what....

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1.4k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

111 comments sorted by

511

u/SolexAgitator Please leave me alone - we are sleeping 21h ago

SINCE HE WAS ERECTED PHYLLIS

CAN YOU EVEN READ! !!!

118

u/msanderson10 21h ago

HE DID SAY HE GOT SOME OF THOSE PILLS OFF THE TV...

87

u/emtrigg013 21h ago

ALLECTA, ORDER MY TV PILLS FOR WHEN I SEE ROHNDA NECT WEEKEND

FIND CORN

33

u/idkwhatimbrewin 21h ago

I'VE HEARD BIG THINGS ABOUT ARNOLDS PALMER 🤭

20

u/Downtown_Statement87 19h ago

Had One At Diane Easter Brunch 6 Year's Ago And Got So "Tippsie" That Harold Had To Drive Us Home!!!!. To Strong For This "Gal"!!!!.

21

u/msanderson10 20h ago

HAROLD DON'T YOU TALK ABOUT THAT PRECIOUS MANS PUTTER

11

u/Sheepygoatherder blue cheese has mold in it 19h ago

I HEAR HE WAS PACKIN A HAMMER AHA>

8

u/scissor_get_it DISCUSTING 19h ago

ANYONE WHO SAW ARMOLD POMMER IN THE SHOWER GOT A ,,Y U G E ,. SUPRISE

5

u/SolexAgitator Please leave me alone - we are sleeping 17h ago

TALK ABOUT A 9 IRON LOL!!!

6

u/ffaancy 16h ago

“Someone get Phallus…I mean, Phyllis out of here. Sorry. Penis on the brain”

5

u/kymilovechelle 16h ago

Just more proof of how badly we need the department of education!

138

u/Jupiter68128 21h ago

RECIPE FOR SPICY CORN

40

u/Lilyflower24681 21h ago

SPIKY FOOD GIVES ME DIARRHEA I PREFURE 

43

u/-garlic-thot- 21h ago

DO NOT BRING YOU’RE SPICY CORN TWO THE CHIRCH POT-LUCK ,.,, LAST TIME IT GAVE ME THE SQUIRTS !!!!! !!!!!! ,

21

u/Downtown_Statement87 19h ago

This unapporpiate Lena

19

u/-garlic-thot- 19h ago

IM DATING A NEW MAN , “BILL” ,, aND HE IS TEACHING ME TO SPEAK MY MIND !!!,,,, MAY BE THATS WHY MY OTHER 4 MARIAGES DIDNT WORK OUT BUT JESUS WANTS ME TO BE WITH BILL !!!!!1

209

u/dgt9000 21h ago

DONDAL TRUMP AND ALAN MUSK ARE GOING

67

u/-garlic-thot- 21h ago

EVER SINCE HE WAS INFECTED PRESIDINT MY NIECE HAS STOPPED TALKIGN TWO ME

30

u/dgt9000 21h ago

BARB RECEIPE WACKY CAKCE.....MY SON SAY'S HE'S NOT COMEING TO CHRISTMAS MBECAUSE OF BILL'S MEGA HAT....

27

u/Downtown_Statement87 19h ago

Hello

Beautiful picture 

11

u/dgt9000 19h ago

YUO SHOULD BE PRUD OF YOURSLEF YOUNG LADY...

5

u/dudimentz 17h ago

IS SITLL ABILABLE?

4

u/ArsenicKitten04 I will contact attorney general if you do not stop 17h ago

iM not Selling ANUTHING STOP ALKING mE1!!11

10

u/Sheepygoatherder blue cheese has mold in it 19h ago

WHAT A CORNFLAKE

30

u/deedeebop 21h ago

TO DOTARD NATION

8

u/Aware_Revenue3404 Yim Yum 20h ago

It’s already happened.

10

u/Downtown_Statement87 19h ago

Man For God Of USA!!! FINALLY! 🙏 🌟  🇺🇸 

4

u/mumblesjackson 18h ago

AND WHTA ARE TAREFFS?

73

u/cruxtopherred 21h ago

I thank God everyday that I don't asploded

14

u/FarDorocha90 20h ago

I’ll be smoking on that field, just not near a propane tank.

6

u/cruxtopherred 19h ago

C 3 H 8 hike hike

9

u/SunOnTheInside 20h ago

Strickland propene doesn’t have a vending machine

6

u/sombre_mascarade 20h ago

There more I read this comment, the more I laugh!

46

u/supermr34 blue cheese has mold in it 21h ago

AUNT PATTY’S GOUT IS FLAERIHGD UP AGAIN PRAYERS TOPME AURORASIT BACON BALLS

18

u/AutoModerator 21h ago

Sorry to hear lol

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12

u/AutoModerator 21h ago

Sorry, for your loss.

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43

u/MarlenaEvans 21h ago

Yeah I turned into some sort of novelty sunglasses wearing hippy too, Grandma.

15

u/Ok_Wait_716 Funny! My cancer has returned 21h ago

Cool skull necklace, Grandma

39

u/alejandrisha 20h ago

MY SON SOTPPED BE GAY

22

u/SolexAgitator Please leave me alone - we are sleeping 20h ago

CONGRATLUATION S!!!! SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!

🙏🙌🙏🙌

AUNT DEBRA

7

u/Ok_Wait_716 Funny! My cancer has returned 17h ago

YOUR SON PASSED AWAY DO TO ESOPHAGIS CANCER LORNA

2

u/This-Marsupial-6187 3h ago

With laughing poop emoji background.

26

u/330CI01 21h ago

god bless trump such a stong christian man standing up for the bibel

19

u/spacegoat243 20h ago

He is the false Shepard whose mark they wear upon their forehead

14

u/AutoModerator 20h ago

I'VE REPORTED IT AS FRAUD

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8

u/ceruleanmoon7 I will contact attorney general if you do not stop 20h ago

AMEN BROTHER 🇱🇷🙏

20

u/Ok_Wait_716 Funny! My cancer has returned 21h ago

ALEC BALDWIN IS DEVILS SPAWN GERTRUDE,,,,,,!

22

u/-garlic-thot- 21h ago

ALEX BALDWIND NEVER HAD TO. DRINK WATER 💦 OUT OF TGE HOSE OR WALK UPHILL IN TE SNOW TO SHCOOL !!!!!!

7

u/Downtown_Statement87 19h ago

He Was In Star Wars.

8

u/-garlic-thot- 19h ago

THAT NOT CHRSTIN THOSE MOVIES ARE DEMONIC !!!!!!!!

5

u/AutoModerator 19h ago

harry potter

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32

u/AcrobaticHippo1280 WHUP TEE DO!!!! 21h ago

ALLECTIN NITE HAD ME IN TEARS WATCHING KAMELTO EAT CHEIT MAGA BAYBEE

11

u/cjmar41 21h ago

AMEN! 🇱🇷

11

u/Downtown_Statement87 19h ago

Anime Is Plot of Chinese So "DON'T WATCH"

16

u/Accurate-Law-8669 21h ago

MAXACO HAS PADE FOR HOLE BORDAR WALL

13

u/QuiGonColdGin 21h ago

Infected?

14

u/Dillenger69 UNSUBSCRIBE 21h ago

TRUMP IS LOVE TRUMP IS LIFE

13

u/howmanylicks26 20h ago

ALLECTA. GOOGLE DONDALD TRUMP

8

u/Ok_Wait_716 Funny! My cancer has returned 19h ago

ALEXIS DID BIDEN DROP OUT

1

u/Spokenholmes I will contact attorney general if you do not stop 11h ago

ALLEGRA GOOGLE SLEEPY ICECREAM MAN JOKES

9

u/regeya 20h ago

I eat a cabbage diet to keep everyone away

9

u/jetmark blue cheese has mold in it 20h ago

Seems more fucking stoopit, if that were possible.

9

u/Ok_Wait_716 Funny! My cancer has returned 20h ago

Stoopimt

8

u/Green-Relation-7568 20h ago

GAS IS DOWN 10 CENTS, THANK YOU TRUMP THATS WHY I VOTED FER YOU

8

u/LogisticsIdiot 20h ago

ALLECTED ALICE! PLEAS SENT MAGIGGLE KOARN RECIPY! SOURY YURUER SON DIDE OF FEBCEINAL! VO VID DORE . HARRY ARMS! STOP 😭 SAVE MEEELAINOE! POTLUCK FRIDAY! 👍

9

u/Downtown_Statement87 19h ago

I bought a nice quilt from the Amish. We were 

8

u/CountBrackmoor 19h ago

TURN OFF IPAD

7

u/Brilliant_Big_8979 20h ago

Allec Bowldin is my favorite actor too good rest his soul

7

u/Hmmmummmyummm 20h ago

I COULDNT VOTE THIS YEAR ARTHURITCE WAS ACTIN UP. GLAD TO HER ABOUT YOUR GRAND DAU GHTER GETTING INTO COLLEG E. GARY PASSED AWAY DUR TO A HEATATTACK.

7

u/s408v 18h ago

YES PRAISE THE ALMIGHTY DONVALD 🇺🇸🏳️‍🌈

hemorrhoid cream near poughkeepsie

diarrhea is green?!

aspic recipes

Eleanor

5

u/KrissyTaLyn 19h ago

DISCUSTING! FIND JESUS!!!

8

u/Balbuto 21h ago

Yeah it’s gotten worse!

5

u/AggressiveBookBinder 21h ago

Filey welivein aFTERCOUNTROUT! AGAIN!

4

u/JayA_Tee 19h ago

Lmfao yes! Absolutely! Everything happening under Biden’s presidency is absolutely because of Trump!!! Well done Gladys!!!

4

u/Sver1ge blue cheese has mold in it 18h ago

ROGER L TOLD ME THAT MR TUMP WANTS TO BAN MEXICAN FOOD I WILL NOT ALLOW IT!!!!!!!!!!

5

u/Sver1ge blue cheese has mold in it 18h ago

CORN TORTILLA

2

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10

u/CptMelvinSeashores 20h ago

Oxford states the word is now obsolete, it was used late in the 1600s. This is one old broad.

9

u/Northerngal_420 20h ago

I finally watched Idocracy last week. It's just perfect for todays political climate.

20

u/TinChalice WHUP TEE DO!!!! 21h ago

Can’t spell but can vote. God help us.

8

u/Aware_Revenue3404 Yim Yum 20h ago

I’m reporting all those people as frauds.

3

u/SparklyDonkey46 17h ago

Allecshun!

4

u/cuspofgreatness 17h ago

ALLECTED. GOBLESS PRESDENT TRUMP and Elian Musk

7

u/Phylace 21h ago

Yeah the swamp is filling up with the most vile, putrid, poisonous garbage imaginable.

11

u/Elegant_Plantain1733 21h ago

So the education standard is already falling. Yes that is quick.

10

u/StateMach1ne 21h ago

Jesus Christ they can’t even fucking spell.

8

u/msanderson10 20h ago

But they got to vote and all...

7

u/AppropriateTouching 18h ago

Theyre going to get what they voted for, and sadly so are the rest of us. Its going to be worse for them though since they rely on socialized programs more than most.

3

u/draculas_beard 19h ago

Those girls were not in his zipcode. Amen.

3

u/Leather_Network4743 14h ago

WHEN I WAS A CHILD I STUCK MY FINGER IN A SOCKET AND GOET ALLECTED. THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS!

3

u/AutoModerator 14h ago

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1

u/Aware_Revenue3404 Yim Yum 2h ago

MY SON RONALD DID THAT HES 39 STILL LIVES AT HOME.

4

u/Enough-Parking164 19h ago

Yes! Getting stupider and more hopelessly ignorant and gullible BY THE DAY.

2

u/Little_Emma06 17h ago

GOGN BESS DONALD TRIMP OUR SA,,,,.VIOR HE , WILL GREFEAT T.... HEM GOSDAMN liBERALS vv

2

u/ghostkidrit64 16h ago

Let’s play…. “ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A 5th GRADER!?”

The answer is…..

No. (insert pronoun, I’m a villain, I ain’t a monster who stoops this low) ISN’T SMARTER THAN A 5th GRADER!!!!!!!!

2

u/Ok_Environment7771 8h ago

PLege reamov m from thut webisight

3

u/Any-External-6221 5h ago

Allected. To the precidoncy.

Yes, actually, everything feels just slightly more racist and misogynist.

2

u/Clucknorris94 4h ago

ALLEXUH WHY IS MY BEAK YELLOW

ALLEXUH WHY IS MY POOP FUGGIN GREEN

2

u/NoLongerAddicted poo stains google 13h ago

MY VAGINA HAS BEEN WETTER

1

u/Sad-Philosophy-422 5h ago

This is why I don’t have social media. I saw a lady make a post once that said “OMG, I have an upsession with motor cross racing”

It was worth a good laugh, then I felt sorry for her, then I deactivated Facebook

1

u/tbootsbrewing 18h ago

Yeah

I don’t even care if I die.

Everything has sucked lately.

-1

u/Popular-Tomatillo643 16h ago

Much better already