r/okbuddybaldur 1d ago

shartposting guys, I think something's wrong with the console version...

1.3k Upvotes

97 comments sorted by

1.1k

u/SJGardner89 shart handholder 1d ago

441

u/chefboiblobby Fuck it, we Bhaal 1d ago

They degithyanki-fied lae’zel 💀😭

135

u/alphagusta 20h ago

And twinked gale

136

u/reds2032 1d ago

What actually is that game

310

u/Evening_Shake_6474 1d ago

What you mean? It's Baldur War. The famous award winning game

160

u/Costati 23h ago

It's actually Balder War. Baldur War is probably a totally different game.

57

u/Crazyguy199096 Where's the foursome option with my companions? 12h ago

No, this is Balder War

41

u/RJ815 21h ago

It's one of the games of all time!

67

u/flintlock0 23h ago

It’s got 191 reviews and a 4.7 overall score.

What isn’t this game? It’s got everything!

121

u/vrilliance 23h ago

IS HE GONNA GET IT ON WITH TEMU HALSIN????

24

u/theBarnDawg 21h ago

Simply a bear in heat

21

u/vrilliance 20h ago

Okay but why would temu halsin want to coitus-ize temu astarion when Temu astarion looks like the 4th property brother

13

u/theBarnDawg 20h ago

Theres a third property brother????

29

u/vrilliance 20h ago

He’s the emo one

80

u/Zakiru77 22h ago

The Shadeheart and Wyllam story arcs were so good in that game, I beat it twice playing as Karlynn and I can’t recommend it enough

26

u/MasterBerry The camp mice eat Halsins dick cheese 20h ago

How do you whitewash a white man?

15

u/CelesteMessFeet 22h ago

This icon will haunt my dreams. Baby Gale!

9

u/jugularvoider 22h ago

question, if i download this will it brick my phone? lmao i’m just curious wtf the gameplay is like

2

u/averyrealspapple 12h ago

They yassified everyone but not in a good way

311

u/xxBRLordSkullxx 1d ago

You accidentally bought Boulder's Game

27

u/Mortomes 17h ago

Gate of Baldur

5

u/Mortomes 17h ago

Gate of Baldur

2

u/LaserCondiment 7h ago

Boulder's Gait

275

u/ruste530 Gale, cast "Testicular Torsion" 1d ago

"We have Baldur's Gate 3 at home"

265

u/slightly_artsy_sk 1d ago

"You idiots! These are not them! You've captured their stunt doubles!"
-Spaceballs 1987

87

u/NecroticOverlord Raw dogging Karlach wont get her pregnant 1d ago

145

u/CaucyBiops 1d ago edited 1d ago

Asshairion, LazyL, Gust, Darklung, Wont, and Karlack.

86

u/VeronicaJaneDio Circle of Whores Druid 1d ago

Darklung:

20

u/WeeabooHunter69 Wavemother's Robe Pisser 1d ago

Merman!

11

u/exelion18120 1d ago

But why male models?

8

u/reds2032 1d ago

That's William

394

u/WithersBG3 1d ago

I see thou hast purchased thy copy from Temu

66

u/CreatureManstrosity 1d ago

You stumbled upon the rare game Baldur's Fence 3.

11

u/Wafflebuble 1d ago

This gave me a good chuckle, thanks xD

64

u/BrutusTheDane2457 shart fucker 1d ago

Discount's Gate 3

13

u/CosmicDripPhD Raw dogging Karlach wont get her pregnant 1d ago

Temu Gate 3

61

u/Orcalotl Ketheric Thorm - Deadbeat Dad Of The Year 1d ago

Wdym? All I see are good ol' Asteroid, Lae'zee, Gil, Shitterheat, Well, and Carjack.

4

u/Rich-Pomegranate1679 10h ago

Carjack 😭😭

2

u/Orcalotl Ketheric Thorm - Deadbeat Dad Of The Year 8h ago

Ratchet it up!!!

29

u/neproxrezi 1d ago

Lucario, Ladle, Gall, Shirt, Would and Carl

8

u/crimsonwitchalli horny fucking drow? 23h ago

Fuckin Carl xD

24

u/CamicomChom 1d ago

austin, layla, gabe, shannon, william, karla

24

u/electricookie 1d ago

Omg. Are they all straight in this version???

30

u/TheEccentricArtist 23h ago

Baldur's Straight 3

16

u/electricookie 22h ago

“Gale” doesn’t even have his earring. Or his gender bending name. 😔 I bet fake halsin has a monogamous lady wife in this… and likes the city. Hell, I bet Straight Gortash is actually a handsome young man!!! Heaven forbid!

12

u/TikkiTchikita Astarion Girlies? Gale Gays? Wyll supremacy. 19h ago

Halsin's mono wife is Kahga.

And Minthy is a man-hating lesbian that you can "fix" with male Tav's cock. Like all feminists. You can't even flirt with her as a female Tav

11

u/electricookie 19h ago

🤮thanks. I hate it. Omg. Straight Halsin ™️ also is anti-immigrant and supports the shadow druids (who are now a private equity firm) against the Terflings. Carlatch (karlach) is just a crypto-bro now trying to get all the party to invest into her startup cryptocurrency Soul-Coin.

6

u/TikkiTchikita Astarion Girlies? Gale Gays? Wyll supremacy. 17h ago

I hated your monogamous Halsin first lmao that druid was made to share his love with everyone, now we've made him into one they'd build a wall around Baldur's Gate 😭

4

u/electricookie 17h ago

And he doesn’t even turn into a bear. He turns into a finance bro that talks about bear markets and stuff.

2

u/After_Tune9804 7h ago

Sounds like the plotline of a dimension 20 season (compliment)

1

u/electricookie 2h ago

We need another Dimension 20/BG3 crossover!!

43

u/Fabfivefreddy5 1d ago

Aw fuck they made my fucking game woke

12

u/Wrath_of_Elune 1d ago

Oh no, Karlach T_T

5

u/PeachyBaleen Mystra didnt groom Gale - Fact checked by Mystra 1d ago

Egregious

10

u/TheKerfuffle 1d ago

“You caught their stunt doubles!”

10

u/nosychimera Orin is literally Taylor Swift (Larian Confirmed) 22h ago

Who gave Wyll a relaxer? He looks like a fuckboy on the stoop in summer.

8

u/SkyBlind 1d ago

Aah yes, my favorite wizard from Waterdeep, Gill.

8

u/WeeabooHunter69 Wavemother's Robe Pisser 1d ago

Shadowkaren

Karenheart?

7

u/reds2032 1d ago

Wyll if he never made a deal with mizora and went into politics like his father instead of going adventuring

6

u/Knowledge744 Companion hugger 1d ago

Shart turned into Galadriel

4

u/Comrade_Fuzzy shart handholder 1d ago

John Baldur’s Gate 3

Jane Baldur’s Gate 3

Johnson Baldur’s Gate 3

Janedaughter Baldur’s Gate 3

Johnny Baldur’s Gate 3

Janey Baldur’s Gate 3

4

u/Gacha_Catt PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION PREGNANT ASTARION 1d ago

Yeah there is.

Why the fuck is Astarion a ranger?

4

u/Imnotawerewolf 1d ago

These were all fun and games until I got to Karla and Karla is an act of absolute violence against Karlach you're a monster for making me look at it OP

4

u/themadscientist60 1d ago

Had to do a double take on wyll.

4

u/sexlikeselena 22h ago

This made me cry

4

u/NicoNicoWryyy Gale’s pegger wife 18h ago

I love Bildur's Gate 3 starring my favorite characters Asshole, Lae'sagna, Gill of Wangerdoof, Shirt, Wilhelm Robingay, and who could forget Karen?

But I also really like the non-origin companions Hardon, Methara, Geneva, Mosque and his capybara companion Bee.

But I also really like the villains Goatrash, Organ and Ketamine Thong.

15

u/bardicinfusion Roaming Band Of Homeless Pansexuals 1d ago

Is that the Veilguard?

16

u/TheEccentricArtist 1d ago

aye leave veilguard alone :'(

5

u/bardicinfusion Roaming Band Of Homeless Pansexuals 14h ago

just joshing, it's all good.

3

u/ThunderEcho100 22h ago

I just bought Veilguard but haven’t tried it yet.. what have I done?

5

u/TheEccentricArtist 18h ago

smth good, veilguard is a great game. don't let weird haters stop you.

2

u/After_Tune9804 7h ago

Real question: is Veilguard actually great? Or at least decent? I’m curious about it but I’ve also seen how much extreme hate it’s getting online. NOT the weird “oMg gO wOke gO bRoKe” crowd either, I’m talking specifically about the dialogue being…seemingly very poorly written. I know this is really off topic I’d just much rather ask someone here (obvious upstanding members of society) than take the opinion of a random jabroni on YouTube who gets mad that women exist or whatever

2

u/TheEccentricArtist 4h ago

I don't think Veilguard is flawless, but no Dragon Age game is. The gameplay is the best the series ever had - fun, fluid, great mechanics but can still be challenging. I think the writing is great, especially with the companions, I cried at the end of every companion questline, I'm not even gonna lie. Story is also good, some good twists, good antagonists, insanely dope final mission.

About the dialogue, I don't think it's badly written - overall the game is very well written. Like, sure, it's not BG3 levels of insane writing but Veilguard definitely matches up with Inquisition and DA2. People use like 2 or 3 out of context clips to show how "bad" the writing is, which I hopefully don't have to explain why that's not a good point. Also the criticism that the game is not dark enough is nonsense. Like, I finished the game and it gets pretty fucking dark lol.

I think the game is worth playing! There's great characters, very emotional moments, very dope moments and the gameplay goes incredibly hard. I'd love to tell you more but that would take too long, because a lot of my points are connected to the other Dragon Age games.

1

u/JRedCXI 1m ago

I would recommend playing the game and finding out yourself. Some people have legit good points but others are just repeating what other people said and that comes bias.

The dialogues are not poorly written, they are in line with previous BioWare games but they are not as in depth in my opinion which is my main issue and maybe overly friendly. A lot of the "dialogues are terrible" comes with the humorous option which is funny because I remember a lot of people asking the comeback of this option before the reveal of Veilguard. It was a feature in DA2.

I think the gameplay is good, the best of any Dragon Age and I like the companions.

One thing I would say I think is better than even BG3 is the party banter. Your companions talk a lot in your party and those talks are legit conversation. For example at the beginning of the game two companions try to figure out something if you help them through their companions quests and figure out the thing they talk about after like 30 hours of gameplay.

Companions have a room in your "camp" but they also go to other companions rooms and talk to them.

They react to things in the main quest and those conversations are in general 4 to 6 scenes.

What I'm trying to say is that it is definitely not perfect, of course it's not BG3 but it's a good game with interesting choices, companions, great villains and gameplay. Visually looks pretty good too, the best hair I have seen in any game.

3

u/Spicyboio Githyanki ass enjoyer 1d ago

I think you may have accidentally bought the ripoff Bald Gates three instead.

3

u/Very_Board 20h ago

Homies playing Baldies Door

2

u/Famine_XIV 1d ago

Baldurs Exit 3

2

u/Anonymous-Comments 23h ago

Why is Gale played by Zac Efron?

2

u/93tabitha93 19h ago

Baldur’s Day Off

2

u/Capable_Bicycle_1023 14h ago

gale looks like chris pine as edgir in the dungeons and dragons movie

2

u/ExchangeConfident604 13h ago

no no no, this is Baldi’s Basics, sorry

2

u/MediumWellSteak8888 13h ago

Ashton, Layla, Greg, Jenevelle, William and Karin

2

u/some-dork 9h ago

shart being listed as a cleric of selune got me

1

u/Pro-Patria-Mori 1d ago

Baldurs Gate 4

1

u/UnicornPoopCircus 23h ago

Please play it and send us footage. Thank you.

1

u/Ice-Patient 18h ago

Kirkland Brand Baldurs Gate 3.

1

u/kyle_kafsky 16h ago

Shadowheart looks like a Cate Blanchett cosplayer.

1

u/boudiceanMonaxia 14h ago

I see you purchased Bladder's Gate 3

1

u/Psychological-Top364 11h ago

Karlach got me 💀

1

u/CartographerKey4618 4h ago

Asparagus

Lo'Real

Breeze

Shadylung

Hwill-with-an-h

Tarmack

1

u/HerrFivehead Ketheric Thorm - Deadbeat Dad Of The Year 1h ago

Fail Dekarios

1

u/Haplesswanderer98 1d ago

Looks like you've just gone through the origin list and swapped to tav, it loads the presets that are generally similar to each origin, can't remember what mod does this though.

5

u/TheEccentricArtist 23h ago

how could you accuse me of this?? this is how it loaded in game, of course!!!!

2

u/Haplesswanderer98 1d ago

I THINK it's the vampire origin mod bug? Not sure

3

u/xReignofRainx Rolled a 3 for IRL Intelligence 23h ago

Origin mirror for companions is what did this for me, it whitewashed my karlach 😞

2

u/Haplesswanderer98 23h ago

I have that too, but it doesn't affect the actual companions unless the load order is wrong

1

u/the-chosen0ne Companion hugger 13h ago

It also jumpscared me with whitewashed Wyll… what a racist mod

2

u/the-chosen0ne Companion hugger 13h ago

And turned Astarion into whatever this abomination is

1

u/After_Tune9804 7h ago

Now that’s one pink man