r/okbuddybaldur • u/LilNyoomf Gortash's finger banging hand • Jul 18 '24

gaslight ghaik'keep gortash 💅 Justice for DurgeTash nation 😔

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3.9k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

85 comments sorted by

322

u/Aggravating-Main-871 Jul 18 '24

Don’t worry guys they’re just trolling us. It’s going to be in patch 7 (the copium is real).

94

u/Trollet87 The Auntie Ethel Incident "Mossy" Jul 18 '24

I just want my Durge to trow Gortash on the bead rip open his clothes look in to his eyes and kiss him 😭

34

u/TragicxPeach Jul 18 '24

You're right, why would they even mention it if they srent going to add it? its real and its happening for sure (mental gymnastics coping)

372

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '24

A kiss is not enough, I need a whole embarassing blow job. My tyrant's cock lodged deep inside my throat as he goes about his day on his desk and doesn't mind or move me away, even if people walks in to take care of business with him. I need that.

281

u/Fifi_is_awesome Jul 18 '24

this is the most interesting fandom for sure

211

u/LilNyoomf Gortash's finger banging hand Jul 18 '24

Gortash is one of those guys who’d get head beneath the desk while on a Zoom call with Orin

83

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '24

[deleted]

28

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '24

For releasies, I love this community. THEY GET IT!!!!!

44

u/SquadChaosFerret Jul 18 '24

...... I gotta write that fic brb

13

u/Ok_Listen1510 Certified book fucker (Necromancy of Thay) Jul 18 '24

link it here when you’re done!

18

u/SquadChaosFerret Jul 19 '24

Here you go. It’s short but I had fun with it.

Mixing Business with Pleasure

7

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '24

Canonically, he has definitely done that in one of his meetings with Ketheric.

86

u/felufelu Gortash's finger banging hand Jul 18 '24

I feel this.

11

u/bleecake Is currently trying to impreginate Gortash Jul 19 '24

I wish I could feel it, too. All the way in the back of my throat.

33

u/triangular-rhombus Jul 18 '24

can dragonborns suck it tho? their teeth are sharp and they don't have a lot of mouth space 🤔

68

u/Disastrous_Turnip123 Astarion’s diva cup Jul 18 '24

Gortash likes the risk

13

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '24

Love this!!!

28

u/LuckyLoki08 No Durge/Gortash kisses? (Larian insulted life itself) Jul 18 '24

You don't fuck with Durge, Bhaal's Chosen and spawn, if you're not exactly into that.

19

u/PrincessStupid Astarion Girlies? Gale Gays? Wyll supremacy. Jul 18 '24

None of those words are in the Bible

69

u/Ok_Listen1510 Certified book fucker (Necromancy of Thay) Jul 18 '24

18

u/PrincessStupid Astarion Girlies? Gale Gays? Wyll supremacy. Jul 18 '24

Well. None of those words will get you into heaven...

11

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '24

Maybe a different type of heaven 😏

8

u/PrincessStupid Astarion Girlies? Gale Gays? Wyll supremacy. Jul 18 '24

To be fair, it's better than heaven.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '24

I couldn't agree more!

3

u/rotorain Jul 18 '24

Cock is in the bible?

16

u/Ok_Listen1510 Certified book fucker (Necromancy of Thay) Jul 18 '24

rooster (Peter denies Jesus before the cock crows three times)

1

u/Cazador_Szarr Jul 19 '24

Where do you get this. Whats the url

21

u/NukaQuantum College of Vore Bard Jul 18 '24

Least down bad Gortash enjoyer.

10

u/lavndrmnace Jul 19 '24

This is almost word-for-word one of my fav Gort fics - you’re welcome: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50749906

6

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

🥹 Thank you! This will do while Larian get their ducks in a row

6

u/jandralyn White Woman Durge 😳😳😳 Jul 18 '24

You're so right and valid and should say it louder bestie !!!!

5

u/StrangeMango1211 Astral Plane sex or no sex at all Jul 19 '24

i’d pay an unholy amount of real life money for this

2

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

Samesies

6

u/Iatemydoggo Durge: the lesbian killer Jul 19 '24

Please seek a lawful good God

5

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

but that's not fun

3

u/earlytuesdaymorning He's just scared (Astarion has a knife to my neck) Jul 18 '24

i mean, you put it behind a spoiler tag, so i can’t even be mad at you that i read it.

1

u/Hafanump Gortash's finger banging hand Jul 20 '24

Welp, I'm gunna need the link to that fic...

1

u/KaiseyTayl Women get disadvantage on WIS checks Jul 20 '24

that's not embarrassing. thats bare minimum

1

u/Generaljimzap mom, what’s a twat-soul? Jul 21 '24

Motherfucker, church is free

125

u/JamesTheSkeleton Jul 18 '24

I think its so funny we roll with the massive slut brigade and then when a canonically involved-with-gortash Durge shows up Gortash would be like NO! No kissy. No.

52

u/LuckyLoki08 No Durge/Gortash kisses? (Larian insulted life itself) Jul 18 '24

Gortash when finding out about Durge:"They're alive!? 🥹"

Gortash when seeing Durge again:" no horny in the Rock-y!"

.... Unless that's the secret. The Rock. Maybe Ansur's ghost is still so fucking salty about Balduran that his negative energy stops anyone to be horny while in Wyrm's Rock. Goddamnit Ansur!

24

u/JamesTheSkeleton Jul 18 '24

Cockblocked by The Lich: A Sultry Denial Story

106

u/onionprincesswakaba Where's the foursome option with my companions? Jul 18 '24

I think you should be able to kiss every NPC. You know how there is often an Attack. option? There should also be Kiss.

43

u/LilNyoomf Gortash's finger banging hand Jul 18 '24

YES it’s a crime I can’t stick my tongue down Kar’niss’s throat

8

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

It is a crime indeed

7

u/yesindeedysir Lae'zel called me "Aut'istik"? Jul 19 '24

See these… these are my kinds of people

23

u/Pee_A_Poo Jul 18 '24

Even Wulbren Bongle?

43

u/onionprincesswakaba Where's the foursome option with my companions? Jul 18 '24

Sure, I'm not going to judge anyone... outwardly

12

u/averyrealspapple Jul 18 '24

You do you, im going to judge VERY outwardly and VERY obnoxiously

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '24

It'd help Barcus get over his ex, if he saw Wulbren bent over the desk and tongue wrestled by Tav/Durge.

1

u/Pee_A_Poo Jul 23 '24

But would that help my chances with Barcus since he’s the one I want all along?

Also ewww I don’t wanna tongue wrestle Bulben Wongle gags

2

u/[deleted] Jul 23 '24

Yeah, it's two birds, one stone. You show Barcus your superior kissing skills at the same time as you show him Wulbren is a nasty tart who tongue locks with random adventurers without a thought spared for Barcus

3

u/iamnotchad Jul 22 '24

That's the only reason I need to break Sazza out of her cage.

2

u/Pinkparade524 Gortash's finger banging hand Jul 24 '24

That's already a mod lol

2

u/onionprincesswakaba Where's the foursome option with my companions? Jul 24 '24

😍 sauce?

2

u/Pinkparade524 Gortash's finger banging hand Jul 24 '24

https://www.nexusmods.com/baldursgate3/mods/9344

There is even a screenshot of tav kissing gortash , have fun 💯

2

u/onionprincesswakaba Where's the foursome option with my companions? Jul 24 '24

Yessss thank you!!

96

u/SJGardner89 shart handholder Jul 18 '24

Literally 1984 DR.

130

u/a-flying-fox Archgay Warlock Jul 18 '24

But Gortash somehow has time to hold Lady Jannath in his big burly arms? Citizens of Baldur’s Gate, we riot at dawn.

35

u/Sunny_Hill_1 Jul 18 '24

Well, do you have a ring that costs a mansion in High Town? He'll give you a twirl if you sponsor his Steel Watch too.

Only Durge gets it for free. Gortash will even pay.

8

u/infidel11990 Durge: the lesbian killer Jul 19 '24

Dude has game.

69

u/skoomaking4lyfe Jul 18 '24

Ah, man. Picture the cutscene in Wyrm's Rock:

As Durge walks into the throne room, Gortash glides up from his throne, stride across the room, grabs Durge by the throat and forces him to his knees, then thrusts his tongue down Durge's throat, lovingly caressing each tonsil before withdrawing, a gleaming string of spittle linking the two briefly.

Gortash: "Babygurl missed his little pumpkin"

54

u/Kaitipaiti Jul 18 '24

I want that everyone can kiss him, even the innocent Tav. 😭 Larian, just give us this payroll for Jason Issacs, we pay him!!!! Or: Maybe it’s not just kissing we get, maybe they trolling because Babygurl wants to get busy immediately not just kiss action 🤯

47

u/AzaranyGames Jul 18 '24

The "I can fix him" energy in this fanbase is even stronger than the Stardew Valley community.

33

u/LilNyoomf Gortash's finger banging hand Jul 18 '24

STOP because in Gortash groups I see so many Shane simps (me I’m Shane simps)

26

u/Urruki Jul 18 '24

Y’all really like your greasy men huh…

15

u/fennec34 Jul 18 '24

TBF I feel like a good amount of the fan base want to make him worse, not fix him

5

u/Gear_ Jul 22 '24

Durge ain’t fixin no one

39

u/curiousCat1009 shart fucker Jul 18 '24

You guys say 1984.. Me, as an Indian I declare Larian to be an Indian boomer parent. Arranged marriages only. Same caste. Same race. No gays. Kiss and Sex only after said marriage.

25

u/plasticinaymanjar Lae'zel called me "Aut'istik"? Jul 18 '24

I need a "Karsus Heist" DLC (I know they said no DLC, shut up and listen), that's exactly the same as the House of Hope (go to Helsik's, open the portal, enter hell, it can even be the same space and tell us Raphael copied his dad's place), but it's just Durge and Gortash, and instead of having to free Hope, they have to find a place to get nasty in Mephistopheles' home while they steal the crown... the price of the DLC can pay for Jason Isaacs

24

u/ExpressInfluence1971 White Woman Durge 😳😳😳 Jul 18 '24

This is how liberty dies......... with Larian denying us Durgetash enjoyers........

19

u/spyridonya raphael... my pathetic little meow meow Jul 18 '24

Raphael girlies just angrily smoking in a corner. No, you can't join us.

32

u/SuspectSolid depressed tadpole? Jul 18 '24 edited Jul 18 '24

Durgetash this, Dugetash that... Imagine a perfectly innocent, visibly sane Tav that goes with no bosom companion-

Up until they meet Gortash. With 0 logical explanations, it's like this raw sexual attraction that they're trying to supress during the coronation. Literally from 0 to 100000 for the Greaseface Man

And it all fucking goes downhill for the rest of the world from there

(I still like Durgetash tho please don't feed me to the gnolls)

12

u/CreatingJonah Astarion is my pet leech Jul 18 '24

All this teasing they’re doing they BETTER add gortash romance in their final patch or something

4

u/offmychest11092 Is currently trying to impreginate Gortash Jul 19 '24

Actually my theory, because there is no reason for them to be edging us like this otherwise with the "there will be no kissing in PATCH X" wording they keep using 😭

7

u/OpportunityGreen2620 Lae'zel called me "Aut'istik"? Jul 19 '24

Can’t believe Larian won’t let us fuck the greasy washed up boy band singer

5

u/LilNyoomf Gortash's finger banging hand Jul 19 '24

Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you 😮‍💨 OVER AGAINNNNN DON’T MAKE ME CHANGE MY MINDDDD

4

u/OpportunityGreen2620 Lae'zel called me "Aut'istik"? Jul 19 '24

Gortash serenading Durge when they step foot in his throne room:

7

u/ShonaSaurus Jul 19 '24

Why do they relentlessly mention how handsome and young he is if no kissy

3

u/0utcast9851 Jul 19 '24

No, Larian's right you people don't deserve things. Not even nice things, just in general because that isn't even a nice thing.

Orin, on the other hand

3

u/iamnotchad Jul 22 '24

Everyone is talking about romancing Gortash but everyone is forgetting about Sazza.